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Posted: 3/28/2002 6:17:51 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/28/2002 6:20:10 AM EDT by Beachboy]
LADIES, IT'S A JOKE, PLEASE DON'T TAKE OFFENSE

10. You can trade an old .44 for two new .22's

9. You can have a handgun at home and another for the road

8. If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will be impressed and let you try a few rounds with it

7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a back-up

6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you are out of ammo

5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space

4. Handguns function normally every day of the month

3. A handgun doesn't ask "do these grips make me look fat?"

2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you're done using it

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN......

1. You can buy a silencer for a handgun!!!!!!!


Again, it's only a joke and no offense is intended. Full nomex on.

Link Posted: 3/28/2002 12:29:30 PM EDT
Hehehehe..... Good one.
Send that in to NOW, see how funny they think it is!
Link Posted: 3/28/2002 4:55:04 PM EDT
Are ya sure that was a joke? I mean...errr...nevermind. I do have more handguns than women. (gotta be careful here)
Link Posted: 4/7/2002 12:16:44 AM EDT
Y'all laugh. At least you can own handguns.
Link Posted: 4/7/2002 11:33:35 AM EDT

Originally Posted By QBit:
Y'all laugh. At least you can own handguns.



LOL, I'd never be so delusional to even suggest one could ever own a woman.
Link Posted: 4/8/2002 3:22:53 PM EDT
Got plenty of handguns........right now....could be happy with a woman.........
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 8:22:50 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/9/2002 8:23:31 AM EDT by Hannah_Reitsch]
Some reasons why handguns are better than men:
1.) Very few handguns are single shot only.
2.) Handguns don't whine about doing their job.
3.) Handguns don't park in front of the TV and become mindless and drooling.
4.) Handguns don't go bald and grow bellies as they get older.
5.) Handguns never need a "night out with all the other handguns."
6.) Handguns rarely smell bad.
7.) Handguns don't grow scratchy stubble.
8.) Handguns don't *care* if you are over 44.
9.) Handguns *don't* go to sleep after one shot.
10.)Handguns don't get jealous if you want to shoot some other handguns.
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 1:49:01 PM EDT
Hannah.....not ALL men are single shots....
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 2:43:11 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 2:49:19 PM EDT
Tyler.....this thread might be going in the wrong direction..?.......
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 3:25:51 PM EDT
Hannah got us! She is stomping on the male ego! Dont ya just hate it when shes right? [>Q] I used to be an Uzi in my younger years, now just a Contender. Gotta make that one shot count!
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 4:15:31 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 4:24:39 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/9/2002 6:04:42 PM EDT by Beachboy]
HANNAH

I am ROFLMAO at your response. But, I must protest, while I'm no longer a BetaMag, I ain't a stack barrel derringer yet!
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 4:52:10 PM EDT
All in the spirit of good fun, guys.
Love ya
Link Posted: 4/9/2002 6:07:25 PM EDT
And that's just how it was taken.
Link Posted: 4/11/2002 8:11:19 AM EDT
Found some more on another board....
12 REASONS A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A MAN

1. Handguns can be used to repel bad guys - and you won't have to listen to the story about how they did it for the next six years.
2. Handguns don't emit noxious gases (unless you're using Armscor or Wolf ammo!)
3. Handguns only need a good boring out with a wire brush and a wipedown with oil for "a special evening".
4. Handguns don't have expensive hobbies, like jetskis, motorcycles, and computers.
5. Handguns don't gripe about your cooking; they don't care what they eat as long as it's ammunition.
6. If the barrel is too small or too short on your handgun, you can buy another handgun with a bigger, longer barrel.
7. Handguns don't require a half-hour of reassurance when they misfire, misfeed, or malfunction.
8. You get to decide what pictures a handgun shoots at.
9. If you ignore a handgun for six months, it won't start shooting wildly if you start using it again.
10. Handguns don't malfunction if you don't pull their trigger "that certain special way" every time.
11. Handguns don't whine when you take them to the department store, the opera, the hairdresser's, the nail salon, the OB/GYN...
12. Handguns are reliable; if you have one that's broken, you can send it back to the factory again and again until it's fixed to your liking.

Link Posted: 4/11/2002 8:35:44 AM EDT
Hannah! ------------------------->
Link Posted: 4/11/2002 12:49:38 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Hannah_Reitsch:
Found some more on another board....
12 REASONS A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A MAN

1. Handguns can be used to repel bad guys - and you won't have to listen to the story about how they did it for the next six years.
2. Handguns don't emit noxious gases (unless you're using Armscor or Wolf ammo!)
3. Handguns only need a good boring out with a wire brush and a wipedown with oil for "a special evening".
4. Handguns don't have expensive hobbies, like jetskis, motorcycles, and computers.
5. Handguns don't gripe about your cooking; they don't care what they eat as long as it's ammunition.
6. If the barrel is too small or too short on your handgun, you can buy another handgun with a bigger, longer barrel.
7. Handguns don't require a half-hour of reassurance when they misfire, misfeed, or malfunction.
8. You get to decide what pictures a handgun shoots at.
9. If you ignore a handgun for six months, it won't start shooting wildly if you start using it again.
10. Handguns don't malfunction if you don't pull their trigger "that certain special way" every time.
11. Handguns don't whine when you take them to the department store, the opera, the hairdresser's, the nail salon, the OB/GYN...
12. Handguns are reliable; if you have one that's broken, you can send it back to the factory again and again until it's fixed to your liking.




Okay, okay, okay, Hannah. Your point is well made! Now why is a woman better than a handgun!
Link Posted: 4/11/2002 4:00:29 PM EDT
Hannah, Hannah, Hannah.....
How about a truce, before somebody takes this thread in the wrong direction?
Link Posted: 4/11/2002 9:37:21 PM EDT
Sure, guys, and to prove my good intentions, let me add one more:
A handgun becomes a Curio and Relic after 50 years, a woman merely becomes......old.
Link Posted: 4/12/2002 6:14:19 PM EDT
How are a Woman and a handgun similar?

Both need to be properly lubricated for optimal function.(oil,liquor, whatever)

Both usually get expensive when you want to accessorize.

Never assume their totally safe. That`s when they`ll kill you.

And definitely never take either for granted. If you do, niether will be there when you need them.

Just a few thoughts.
Link Posted: 4/24/2002 10:53:07 PM EDT
If you hold her gently,breath just right,and put it right dead center,one shots all you really need to get the job done.

Bob Cole [;(]
Link Posted: 5/2/2002 7:15:12 PM EDT
[snip]

Originally Posted By Hannah_Reitsch:
only need a good boring out with a wire brush


[/snip]

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