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Posted: 3/9/2006 8:14:54 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/9/2006 8:16:12 AM EDT by daisywench]
I'm very much a Northerner. I talk fast, and I don't talk to people I don't know, and I keep my "personal space" around me with other people.

Well, this new girl just recently started in my office. She's a toucher, and a close talker.

Skeeves me out. She just came up behind me, put her arm around my shoulder, started rubbing my back and talking to me. Now, that's fine, I love questions, I'm the office trainer, very willing to share information.

But for God's sake, don't touch me. With the exception of family and close friends (Who I hug every time I see them) I don't like to be touched.

Anyone else hate the "touchers"?
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 8:28:26 AM EDT
I'm afraid the woman would have been laid out on the floor at the first touch. Its that automatic. I'd give Chuck Norris a round house kick to the face if he invaded my space.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 8:29:52 AM EDT
I also hate the touchers........ I have a "bubble" so to speak.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:12:05 AM EDT
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:16:15 AM EDT

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???



NO! GAR! Ya squished me boobies!

argh.

Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:24:10 AM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???



NO! GAR! Ya squished me boobies!

argh.




<fluffing them back up>
Better?


Ya just KNOW the pervs are gonna be in here now!
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:25:58 AM EDT

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???



NO! GAR! Ya squished me boobies!

argh.




<fluffing them back up>
Better?


Ya just KNOW the pervs are gonna be in here now!



Yer a mighty good Fluffer, PM. You can fluff me anytime.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:28:35 AM EDT
The girl that came up behind you and started rubbing your back, was she hot? What was she wearing? What were you wearing? Paint us a picture here, so to speak..

Better yet, post a pic.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 10:56:19 AM EDT
Maybe she has the hots for you?
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 11:26:41 AM EDT
I'm a touchy person sometimes. Depends on the person I get to touch.


If I don't know someone, or don't like them then I don't want them near me and they'll know it before they get within 2'.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 11:31:35 AM EDT
No, I know what you mean. I don't mind the touchiness IF I KNOW YOU REALLY WELL. Otherwise....it's just weird.

Sometimes if someone's doing the touchy thing and it's weirding me out, I say to them, "at least buy me a drink first."
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 11:36:53 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/9/2006 11:37:42 AM EDT by dvr9]
Hello ladies...I was told to report here.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 11:54:04 AM EDT

Originally Posted By dvr9:
Hello ladies...I was told to report here.



Are you a touchy person DV8?

Link Posted: 3/9/2006 12:11:13 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/9/2006 12:12:12 PM EDT by daydreamer]
She is showing no respect for your space. Feel free to make that clear both verbally and nonverbally, in public and in private if necessary. It may be that you have already made it clear nonverbally and she is ignoring your cues; that makes her an aggressor.

Was taught in a drama class with a very useful visual that all people have personal space, but that it varies. The teacher took several class members to the front of the class and told them to stand in one place. He approached closer and closer until each one in turn backed away or avoided him. Some had larger "bubbles" than others; they usually made it clear with body language.

[ETA: This from a generally friendly southerner.]
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 12:14:00 PM EDT
It depends if it "a good touch" or "a bad touch". And that depends on what mood I'm in and who's doing it.

But really... I don't mind too much. Now if I have no idea who you are... probably shouldn't be touching me but if I know ya... touch away if you feel you need to.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 12:28:29 PM EDT
Grrrr. I hate touchers. If I don't know you then there's no reason in the world for you to touch me.
Hell, I don't let some people I know touch me either. This is MY space, stay out!
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 1:00:43 PM EDT

Originally Posted By drache:
Grrrr. I hate touchers. If I don't know you then there's no reason in the world for you to touch me.
Hell, I don't let some people I know touch me either. This is MY space, stay out!



Can I get an AMEN!?
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 1:04:30 PM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By drache:
Grrrr. I hate touchers. If I don't know you then there's no reason in the world for you to touch me.
Hell, I don't let some people I know touch me either. This is MY space, stay out!



Can I get an AMEN!?



Girls that say that alot really don't like to be touched....

WHAT???!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 1:34:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By HeldHostage:
I also hate the touchers........ I have a "bubble" so to speak.



+1 and I have been known to become psycho in the checkout line when the person behind me doesn't get the hint when I keep inching forward after glaring at them for being to close.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 2:01:02 PM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???



NO! GAR! Ya squished me boobies!

argh.




<fluffing them back up>
Better?


Ya just KNOW the pervs are gonna be in here now!



Yer a mighty good Fluffer, PM. You can fluff me anytime.




I gotta come in here more often
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:05:20 PM EDT
Yeah, touchy people, regardless of gender, make me uncomfortable if they're strangers. If it's somebody I know, eh, fine, depending on how I feel about them. If it's a close friend or family, sure, hug me or whatever (doesn't matter if you're male or female), but if you're a stranger or a coworker or someone I don't like (99% of the people in the world, haha), don't even think about getting close like that, LOL.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:20:40 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Bob1984:
Yeah, touchy people, regardless of gender, make me uncomfortable if they're strangers. If it's somebody I know, eh, fine, depending on how I feel about them. If it's a close friend or family, sure, hug me or whatever (doesn't matter if you're male or female), but if you're a stranger or a coworker or someone I don't like (99% of the people in the world, haha), don't even think about getting close like that, LOL.



Bob if I ever run into you I'm going to make sure you get a group hug.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:58:09 PM EDT
Once standing in the line for the ladies room at the Kennedy Center, this old fat woman kept resting her enormous gut on my butt. I kept inching away from her, turning to the side, and then I finally turned around facing her hoping she would back off. She still didn't get the hint and it was just too creepy having her bumping into my abdomen with her roll of fat, so I turned around. I really wanted to assault an old woman! If she hadn't been old... I can't imagine why someone wants to get that close unless he/she is a perv, or trying to pick your pocket.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 4:00:34 PM EDT

Originally Posted By bblake00:

Originally Posted By Bob1984:
Yeah, touchy people, regardless of gender, make me uncomfortable if they're strangers. If it's somebody I know, eh, fine, depending on how I feel about them. If it's a close friend or family, sure, hug me or whatever (doesn't matter if you're male or female), but if you're a stranger or a coworker or someone I don't like (99% of the people in the world, haha), don't even think about getting close like that, LOL.



Bob if I ever run into you I'm going to make sure you get a group hug.



Link Posted: 3/9/2006 5:34:19 PM EDT
I am not a touchy, feely person.. even with people I like.

I tend to like my personal "aura" around me, and not to be invaded.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 5:40:32 PM EDT
I generally don't mind touchy too much but I have my personal space requirements, 2 foot minimum is generally enough. A step one way or the other generally gives the up-in-the-grill folks the hint to talk to me from more than 2 inches away.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 6:00:13 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 6:09:17 PM EDT
toucher here--apparently im in the minority

i do have what i think are appropriate boundaries, though--i would NEVER just come up and get all touchy feely like your new employee, daisy--thats way too much, especially in a work environment--i am careful to remain professional at work and pay close attention to body language and non-verbal cues--i know who i can and cant touch at work, and by this i mean a touch on the arm or back when i go by your desk or see you at the copy machine--im not going to go running into someones office and smack them flat with a hug --i am known for my awesome backscratches and backrubs, though--free of charge and upon request--bottom line, im probably not touching you at work unless you have invited it


in my personal life is a bit different, though--if i have met you once, you are more than likely to be asked for or offered a hug when i see you again (did i hug you when we met, mrsgh?? i cant remember) i try not to be overborad with it and alwyas ask before i hug you the first time, but youd better take the opportunity then to tell me you prefer not to be hugged, cause your on my list if i get one--i have also been known to forget and am sensitive to gentle reminders--i dont expect you to be uncomfortable--im just a hugger (and a poker, tapper, tickler--im kind of an attention hound in person)

why, you may ask?? i dunno--ive always had a fairly small personal space--i dont mind crowds or sitting in a crowded arena or standing in line for the bathroom
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 6:37:53 PM EDT

Originally Posted By diabolical_chicken:
toucher here--

---i am known for my awesome backscratches and backrubs, though--free of charge and upon request---






Really now...

Link Posted: 3/9/2006 6:46:17 PM EDT

Originally Posted By bblake00:
Really now







Link Posted: 3/9/2006 6:54:40 PM EDT
Did she have man hands or something?
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 7:05:43 PM EDT

Originally Posted By diabolical_chicken:

Originally Posted By bblake00:
Really now



www.orlyowls.com/owls/old/yarly.jpg







You're such a hoot!
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 9:25:47 PM EDT
I'm sort of half and half in this regard. My "personal bubble" is normally pretty small, I don't have a problem with other people entering my personal space and touching me, but unless it's a very neutral situation like a handshake or when I really need to get someone's attention (in which case I use a touch to their shoulder or arm), I'm almost never the first to enter their personal space and touch them.

After all, they probably have cooties.

Now, back to the fluffing!
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 6:56:01 AM EDT

Originally Posted By MrsGungho:

Originally Posted By HeldHostage:
I also hate the touchers........ I have a "bubble" so to speak.



+1 and I have been known to become psycho in the checkout line when the person behind me doesn't get the hint when I keep inching forward after glaring at them for being to close.



I've been known to 'accidentally' step back onto their foot, or, if they're standing behind me with a cart, I bump it then act like they hurt me. It's really funny.

But yeah. I've gotta have my eighteen inches.
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 7:06:27 AM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By dvr9:
Hello ladies...I was told to report here.



Are you a touchy person DV8?




Only to the point where I get slapped.

Have you seen the world famous dollar bill trick?
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 7:11:44 AM EDT
I don't mind it when hot wimmenz touch me...everyone else, keep your hands where I can see 'em.
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 7:13:46 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Ginger:

Originally Posted By MrsGungho:

Originally Posted By HeldHostage:
I also hate the touchers........ I have a "bubble" so to speak.



+1 and I have been known to become psycho in the checkout line when the person behind me doesn't get the hint when I keep inching forward after glaring at them for being to close.



I've been known to 'accidentally' step back onto their foot, or, if they're standing behind me with a cart, I bump it then act like they hurt me. It's really funny.

But yeah. I've gotta have my eighteen inches.




Link Posted: 3/10/2006 7:50:44 AM EDT
I'm gonna have to draw down on this chick.

Today, we're ordering chinese. She comes over, puts her hand on my shoulder, holds the menu and says "what's good". I said "IT's a freaking chinese restaurant!".

ugh. And she had on this wicked perfume, that made my already bad headache go into supersonic mode. I swear I'm gonna have to hit her.

Link Posted: 3/10/2006 8:02:39 AM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:
I'm gonna have to draw down on this chick.

Today, we're ordering chinese. She comes over, puts her hand on my shoulder, holds the menu and says "what's good". I said "IT's a freaking chinese restaurant!".

ugh. And she had on this wicked perfume, that made my already bad headache go into supersonic mode. I swear I'm gonna have to hit her.





If you fight her would give us a heads up so we can tape it for our training vids later.
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 9:25:58 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/10/2006 9:42:55 AM EDT by SP1Grrl]
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 9:27:16 AM EDT

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By Ginger:

Originally Posted By MrsGungho:

Originally Posted By HeldHostage:
I also hate the touchers........ I have a "bubble" so to speak.



+1 and I have been known to become psycho in the checkout line when the person behind me doesn't get the hint when I keep inching forward after glaring at them for being to close.



I've been known to 'accidentally' step back onto their foot, or, if they're standing behind me with a cart, I bump it then act like they hurt me. It's really funny.

But yeah. I've gotta have my eighteen inches.









That didn't come out right, did it? That'd bring tears to a girl's eyes.



This might seem a little extreme, but try eating a few garlic cloves and breathing on her for a few days. Bet she backs off big time.

For me, how much touching I tolerate depends largely on the vibes the person is giving off. Complete strangers can get the hell away from me. But people I don't know that well who seem 'touchy' can be tolerated if there's no pervy vibe going on. Depends on the person and the situation.



Link Posted: 3/10/2006 11:09:11 AM EDT
Until a few years ago, I needed my own 'personal space', but with the ethnic groups i've been socializing with, it's considered the norm. Meet the friend of a friend and it's an automatic hug, or kiss on the cheek. It was wierd at first. My family isn't real close to begin with and to have some come up to you and hug you was a shocker.

Can't complain now though. Go with the flow.


Link Posted: 3/10/2006 12:54:10 PM EDT
I used to require a lot of personal space when around others.

Living in Venezuela for a few years changed some of that. In Venezuela, the people stand close to you when talking, and the women great friends and family with a hug and kiss on the cheek. At the time I was a missionary so I wasn't allowed to accept the hugs and kisses (darn it! It hurt to have to exert so much self control!) On a few occasions girls snuck past my defenses and landed a kiss on my cheek.

Anyway, I've since been able to handle close proximity a little better. I frequently greet close guy friends with handshakes, family with hugs, and with women it depends on how well I know them. Usually a handshake is in order but sometimes a hug.

What I can't handle are crowded conditions, with or without touching. If I'm in a room crowded full of people, I try to find a less occupied area.

My wife is the one person with whom I want as much physical contact as possible, whether it's giving a pat, hug, squeeze, etc., etc.
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 1:57:23 PM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:
I'm gonna have to draw down on this chick.

Today, we're ordering chinese. She comes over, puts her hand on my shoulder, holds the menu and says "what's good". I said "IT's a freaking chinese restaurant!".

ugh. And she had on this wicked perfume, that made my already bad headache go into supersonic mode. I swear I'm gonna have to hit her.





WIll there be a range report when you hit it?
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 2:00:55 PM EDT

Originally Posted By UH_SALT_RIFLE:

Originally Posted By daisywench:
I'm gonna have to draw down on this chick.

Today, we're ordering chinese. She comes over, puts her hand on my shoulder, holds the menu and says "what's good". I said "IT's a freaking chinese restaurant!".

ugh. And she had on this wicked perfume, that made my already bad headache go into supersonic mode. I swear I'm gonna have to hit her.





WIll there be a range report when you hit it?


Link Posted: 3/10/2006 3:48:16 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By Ginger:
But yeah. I've gotta have my eighteen inches.






Glad I'm not the only person who saw that.
Link Posted: 3/10/2006 3:54:39 PM EDT
to be honest DW, I don't hate touchers as much as I hate close talkers, a friend of mine is a close talker....but the bad part is his breath is like smelling hot garbage , be glad your not im my posistion
Link Posted: 3/11/2006 6:00:46 AM EDT

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By daisywench:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:
I'm touchy ONLY with people I know well.
And Like.

<squeezes the stuffing outta Daisy>

There...Don'tcha feel better now???



NO! GAR! Ya squished me boobies!

argh.




<fluffing them back up>
Better?


Ya just KNOW the pervs are gonna be in here now!



Yer a mighty good Fluffer, PM. You can fluff me anytime.



OOH! OOH! sigline material right there. Can I use it?, can I?, can I?
Link Posted: 3/11/2006 6:32:05 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Shane333:
I used to require a lot of personal space when around others.

Living in Venezuela for a few years changed some of that. In Venezuela, the people stand close to you when talking, and the women great friends and family with a hug and kiss on the cheek. At the time I was a missionary so I wasn't allowed to accept the hugs and kisses (darn it! It hurt to have to exert so much self control!) On a few occasions girls snuck past my defenses and landed a kiss on my cheek.

Anyway, I've since been able to handle close proximity a little better. I frequently greet close guy friends with handshakes, family with hugs, and with women it depends on how well I know them. Usually a handshake is in order but sometimes a hug.

What I can't handle are crowded conditions, with or without touching. If I'm in a room crowded full of people, I try to find a less occupied area.

My wife is the one person with whom I want as much physical contact as possible, whether it's giving a pat, hug, squeeze, etc., etc.



In my old neighborhood, we had neighbors from Trinidad. They were the WARMEST people I've ever met. Generous, affectionate. Very much a culture thing, this touching phenomena.

Link Posted: 3/11/2006 6:32:38 AM EDT

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:

Originally Posted By PlaymoreMinds:

Originally Posted By Ginger:
But yeah. I've gotta have my eighteen inches.






Glad I'm not the only person who saw that.



At 18 inches, how could ya miss it?????
Link Posted: 3/11/2006 7:11:43 AM EDT
Hell, you'd be tripping over it.
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