Need help from the ladies on picking a present... (Update Page 2)

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Need help from the ladies on picking a present... (Update Page 2)

Posted: 12/1/2005 8:37:06 AM EDT

Umm.... Hi.

I want to buy Trillian, with whome things may....... MAY, have turned around, or be in the process of ddoing so, something VERY nice for Christmas.

I want it to be personal, elegant, and meaningful. I am willing to pay up to around $500. No, I'm not kidding. I can afford it. Once.

I recognize the risks, but I won't bore you with the faith-based reasons I'm going to go for broke.

What would you recommend?

She doesn't do much asie from work, and while she's just setting up a new house she's renting, I'm not sure that anything for the home would express how I feel. The default is jewelry, but I'm wondering if there is a better alternative.

Oh, and I'd like to get her mom something (obviously a token, nowhere NEAR as expensive). Thing is, I know NOTHING about her, and I want to surprise BOTH of them with it.

I'm either an incureable romantic or a complete idiot. Time will tell.

Thanks for the help.

- Clueless in Laredo

Posted: 12/1/2005 8:45:53 AM EDT

[#1]

My advice would be give her your time. Maybe a week end at a bed and breakfast. A cruise. Fly some where warm and go shopping for the house.

Congratulations. If it was me, a nice new CCW would be very romantic!

Posted: 12/1/2005 8:56:17 AM EDT

[#2]

Sadly, we've not gotten to that point yet (where she'd spend a weekend or something), but maybe I could always ask.

We WERE at that point once. Then someone lied to her about me, and she recoiled. It's taken eight months of patient chasing to get her to realize I wasn't at fault, and I can see the change in her eyes. Now I simply have to continue being patient. I've told her how I feel, and done what I can to show her within the limits I've been given. Maybe I want this gift to really drive the point home.

I love her, and until I hear her tell me to get lost from her own mouth, I'll not quit. Amen.

Posted: 12/1/2005 9:10:57 AM EDT

[#3]

Two rooms. You can always get two rooms.

PS I'm so jealous!

Posted: 12/1/2005 9:54:11 AM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:
Two rooms. You can always get two rooms.

That's true....

PS I'm so jealous!

Thanks.

I'm hoping she'll appreciate it.

Posted: 12/1/2005 12:23:33 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
Umm.... Hi.

I want to buy Trillian, with whome things may....... MAY, have turned around, or be in the process of ddoing so, something VERY nice for Christmas.

I want it to be personal, elegant, and meaningful. I am willing to pay up to around $500. No, I'm not kidding. I can afford it. Once.

I recognize the risks, but I won't bore you with the faith-based reasons I'm going to go for broke.

What would you recommend?

She doesn't do much asie from work, and while she's just setting up a new house she's renting, I'm not sure that anything for the home would express how I feel. The default is jewelry, but I'm wondering if there is a better alternative.

Oh, and I'd like to get her mom something (obviously a token, nowhere NEAR as expensive). Thing is, I know NOTHING about her, and I want to surprise BOTH of them with it.

I'm either an incureable romantic or a complete idiot. Time will tell.

Thanks for the help.

- Clueless in Laredo

Well, just a few suggestions that I would like if I were in a new apartment..

A nice stereo system with surround sound and a selection of DVD's you can watch together?

a kitten? (I personally would love that..not needy like a puppy, but good company).

Jewelry is always good. How about a nice bedroom set (linens for the bed..new pillows, comforter, all the trimmings, etc?)

These are just things that I know would show me that you're very thoughtful, and practical as well, and you're not just buying jewelry that anyone could buy.

But jewelry is always good, too.

Posted: 12/1/2005 1:28:09 PM EDT

[#6]

I like Daisy's suggestions.

Posted: 12/1/2005 5:48:35 PM EDT

[#7]

is this your wife or a gf?

wait, that has not much to do with the gift, im just nosy

i think the bedroom set is a neat idea

we often recommend a spa day or some such, too

Posted: 12/1/2005 6:25:57 PM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
Sadly, we've not gotten to that point yet (where she'd spend a weekend or something), but maybe I could always ask.

We WERE at that point once. Then someone lied to her about me, and she recoiled. It's taken eight months of patient chasing to get her to realize I wasn't at fault, and I can see the change in her eyes. Now I simply have to continue being patient. I've told her how I feel, and done what I can to show her within the limits I've been given. Maybe I want this gift to really drive the point home.

I love her, and until I hear her tell me to get lost from her own mouth, I'll not quit. Amen.

daisywench I am not putting down your idea.
diabolical_chickens idea, spa.

but with the above said. The bedroom stuff may give her the wrong idea.hardI’m still thinking of an Idea for her, but for mom a gift certificate to a Spa.

If your lady works hard she might like that too. If she and her mom get along?

Drop them off. Pick them up, Take mom home,
Take GF to a nice dinner and other romantic stuff, give her more gifts if needed.
They get to spend the day together. You get brownie points from mom, GF happy, la de Da.

Just a thought.

Oh and sorry ladies I have not posted to say Hello in the women’s forum yet, not trying to be rude,
But I wanted to jump in on this thread.

Hello

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:17:04 AM EDT

[#9]

To answer all the questions:

Ex-GF, who became an ex when someone lied to her about me. It's taken 8 months to get her to be a possible GF again, once she realized she'd been had. Unfortunately, those eight months saw a lot of stress between us, especially since we work together (and there are issues with that, too).

Her mom lives out of town. As for picking them up and dropping them off at the spa, I'll remind everyone that I live in Laredo, and Trillian lives in NUEVO Laredo (as in Mexico). The only thing around here that remotely resembles a spa is the Rio Grande.

The idea for the bed set is pretty cool, but I really want something PERSONAL. While sheets may be considered such, the fact is they wear out and are discarded. I'd like something more permanent. Besides, the only thing I want to give her for her bed is ME (again)!

She has two dogs, and is no fan of cats. Probably not a good idea. Bummer.

Yes, her mom and her get along. Her mother raised her and her two brothers alone after her dad died when she was 8. That must be one hell of a woman. I've not been permitted to meet her because she doesn't want to introduce her to anyone until she's going to be married. This has been confirmed by her brother (nice guy).

WTF do you women have to be so GD complicated? We men go through life being told that all you want is to be loved, and here I am offering exactly that, and all this shit happens!

Like I said: Incurable romantic or hopeless idiot. Time will tell.

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:19:18 AM EDT

[#10]

Quoted:
To answer all the questions:

Ex-GF, who became an ex when someone lied to her about me. It's taken 8 months to get her to be a possible GF again, once she realized she'd been had. Unfortunately, those eight months saw a lot of stress between us, especially since we work together (and there are issues with that, too).

Her mom lives out of town. As for picking them up and dropping them off at the spa, I'll remind everyone that I live in Laredo, and Trillian lives in NUEVO Laredo (as in Mexico). The only thing around here that remotely resembles a spa is the Rio Grande.

The idea for the bed set is pretty cool, but I really want something PERSONAL. While sheets may be considered such, the fact is they wear out and are discarded. I'd like something more permanent. Besides, the only thing I want to give her for her bed is ME (again)!

She has two dogs, and is no fan of cats. Probably not a good idea. Bummer.

Yes, her mom and her get along. Her mother raised her and her two brothers alone after her dad died when she was 8. That must be one hell of a woman. I've not been permitted to meet her because she doesn't want to introduce her to anyone until she's going to be married. This has been confirmed by her brother (nice guy).

WTF do you women have to be so GD complicated? We men go through life being told that all you want is to be loved, and here I am offering exactly that, and all this shit happens!

Like I said: Incurable romantic or hopeless idiot. Time will tell.

go with the jewelry Zaphod. Ya asked for suggestions, hon. Don't shoot the suggestors.

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:32:14 AM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:

go with the jewelry Zaphod. Ya asked for suggestions, hon. Don't shoot the suggestors.

He's not. He's just a little stressed out about this whole thing, which I can understand. Zaph, you need to go with jewelry. How about something like a past, present, future diamone necklace? (Google it.) You could always go poke around on the Tiffany's website and see what you can find.

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:36:25 AM EDT

[#12]

Quoted:
Quoted:

go with the jewelry Zaphod. Ya asked for suggestions, hon. Don't shoot the suggestors.

He's not. He's just a little stressed out about this whole thing, which I can understand. Zaph, you need to go with jewelry. How about something like a past, present, future diamone necklace? (Google it.) You could always go poke around on the Tiffany's website and see what you can find.

See the smiley?? I was kidding.

Anyway..I like the 3 diamond pendants, those are really pretty...or the single diamond bezel pendant. Very nice, and not all mushy like a heart pendant might be construed.

OH!!!!!! WAIT!!!!!!!!! How about a watch????????????? A really nice one.

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:50:41 AM EDT

[#13]

Gifts are materialistic, time will be charished and remembered for a life time. If your g/f has been stressed over her new apartment and work - take her away from that and give her your time.

Patty

Posted: 12/2/2005 8:35:13 AM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

go with the jewelry Zaphod. Ya asked for suggestions, hon. Don't shoot the suggestors.

Oh, gosh! I hope I didn't give THAT impression!

Believe me, I appreciate the advice! So far, jewelry looks best, and I'm still going to see if there is a spa in the area (or in Mom's home town, for that matter).

Sorry if there was any confusion!

Posted: 12/2/2005 8:38:07 AM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
Gifts are materialistic, time will be charished and remembered for a life time. If your g/f has been stressed over her new apartment and work - take her away from that and give her your time.

Patty

I'll be offering that, too. The poor thing is really stressed out.

I've seen the past, present, future necklaces and earings. Definitely something to consider (nicest thing I've seen, actually). I'm going to head up to San Antonio on Sunday to do some shopping, as the selection here is limited to Zales and a few other mall bandits. Since the competition is slim, I'm not convinced the prices are the best.

Thanks for the understanding, SP1!

Posted: 12/2/2005 8:55:41 AM EDT

[#16]

Zaphod..no worries. I put a smiley in there to show I was kidding. see?

And I still like the watch idea. My boyfriend bought me one for our first christmas together (he did an awesome job picking it out) and I look at it every day and think of him, and how lucky I am.

Posted: 12/2/2005 9:01:02 AM EDT

[#17]

Hey Zaph...OK...My opinion? I am no jewelry person. I am accessory challenged.

If she is not into jewelry and you're looking for "personal" you'll need to fill us in on her likes/hobbies. Best Christmas gift I ever got (as an adult) was a rocking chair. But if had alot of personal meaning: I was 5 mos pregnant with my first boy. I was firm on the whole breastfeeding thing. I did not like the "gliders" that were in alot of the furniture stores. I wanted a classic oak rocker. Hubby found one. Stashed it. We went to bed Christmas Eve with all the presents wrapped under the tree as we always did (remember, no kids yet). Christmas morning, hubby woke me up saying "Santa" had come. I told him I was tired (pregnant, remember?) and wanted more sleep. Goofy man could not contain himself and dragged me outta bed: in front of the tree was my oak rocker.

I have no clue how he managed to hide it from me in our tiny little house that we had back then, but he did. And stashing it under the tree during the nite? Goofball sweet...and the best Christmas I've had as an adult..

So...point of this story...sometimes it is not just the gift...but HOW you gift it. THINK about her and how you can make WHATEVER you give MEMORABLE.

Hope I've helped.

Posted: 12/2/2005 9:07:31 AM EDT

[#18]

Quoted:
So...point of this story...sometimes it is not just the gift...but HOW you gift it. THINK about her and how you can make WHATEVER you give MEMORABLE.

Hmmmmmm......

Hope I've helped.

You have!

Posted: 12/2/2005 9:11:48 AM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
Quoted:
So...point of this story...sometimes it is not just the gift...but HOW you gift it. THINK about her and how you can make WHATEVER you give MEMORABLE.

Hmmmmmm......

Hope I've helped.

You have!

Ya know...a range report (of the gift...not the gratitude) needs to be posted no later than 12/27.

Posted: 12/2/2005 2:58:28 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:

Ya know...a range report (of the gift...not the gratitude) needs to be posted no later than 12/27.

I'll post one, but I can't guarantee the date.

She's a bit hard to nail down, I'm afraid.

Posted: 12/2/2005 4:45:34 PM EDT

[#21]

Ooh ooh, PM's right. It's not just the gift, but how it's presented that also means so much. Think of different ways to give it to her instead of just wrapped up under the tree. Quick story: When I was younger, my mom gave me some silly little sussy, but to make it fun for me to open she devised a treasure hunt. You know, she handed me a clue, which led me to another and another until I found the hiding spot where my gift was. I had a blast and it still holds the #1 spot for coolest way I've ever gotten anything. You could do the same thing, except at each of the hiding spots with a clue, you could put a little something along with it. A cd she wants, gift certificate to Blockbuster or Starbucks (or whatever she likes), a few Hershey Kisses with a sweet little card, you know things like that. Then at the final spot, there'd be her necklace (or whatever you decide on). That's awesome!

It's all about the presentation, dear. All about the presentation.

Posted: 12/2/2005 4:52:28 PM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
... I am willing to pay up to around $500. No, I'm not kidding. I can afford it. Once...

It's a sign! By incredible coincidence - or divine design, who am I to say - I know where there's a tractor for sale for $500.

I bet she'd LOVE a tractor restoration project. You could use SP1Girl's treasure-hunt idea to lead her to it!

Am I a romantic genius, or what?! It's no wonder I'm such a lady's man.

Posted: 12/2/2005 5:07:07 PM EDT

[#23]

Quoted:
Quoted:
... I am willing to pay up to around $500. No, I'm not kidding. I can afford it. Once...

It's a sign! By incredible coincidence - or divine design, who am I to say - I know where there's a tractor for sale for $500.

I bet she'd LOVE a tractor restoration project. You could use SP1Girl's treasure-hunt idea to lead her to it!

Am I a romantic genius, or what?! It's no wonder I'm such a lady's man.

tinypic.com/i408m1.jpg

No tractor.

Posted: 12/3/2005 11:07:36 AM EDT

[#24]

A tractor?

Why not give her a vacuum cleaner and save some money?

Posted: 12/3/2005 12:05:19 PM EDT

[#25]

Zaphod, there's a store called James Avery in Texas and they sell jewelry. Charm, necklaces, and the like. Not really fancy gemstone stuff, but they have nice, well-made items which have been in style for at least 25 years. I don't think you can go wrong with them. You should be able to find something for both your lady friend and her mom. (What about a nice gold cross and chain?)

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:28:05 AM EDT

[#26]

Well, it looks like I won't have to bother.

I had asked God that if she wasn't the one, then I wanted to hear it straight from her own mouth.

Well, today I did.

I submit. So be it.

Funny. I feel a lot better than I thought I would. Not that I feel good, mind you.

Thanks again for all the help, everyone.

Sigh...... Back on the market again. God, I HATE this shit.

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:40:57 AM EDT

[#27]

Sorry to hear, Zaphod. Even if it's for the best, it's rough that it happened right before Christmas.

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:43:12 AM EDT

[#28]

I'm very sorry. I wish I had some thing useful to say.

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:46:00 AM EDT

[#29]

Wow. That's so sad. I'm sorry to hear that Zaphod.

There's someone out there for you, have faith in that.

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:52:48 AM EDT

[#30]

It happened nine months ago. One of those, "I just want to be friends" things.

Then I discover that some ex-BF asked her to marry him, and she half-heartedly said yes.

Well, I got the sign I'd asked for, and I very gently warned her to be very, VERY careful about getting married. Even leaving me out of it, I don't want to see her go through what I just went through the past three years.

The Lord will provide. She even offered to set me up with her friend. What the hell. Can't hurt. I'll be leaving this shithole in April, anyway, especially now that my one reason to stay is gone.

I'm just glad that it happened before I spent $500+! That's an Aimpont, baby!

ETA: I'll never understand women. I know what I am, and more than one woman has told me that any woman would have to be nuts not to snatch me up, and yet "the one" continues to elude me. The fact I fall to quickly doesn't help. I wasn't kidding when I said I'm an incurrable romantic.

Real bummer....

Posted: 12/13/2005 11:59:14 AM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
It happened nine months ago. One of those, "I just want to be friends" things.

Then I discover that some ex-BF asked her to marry him, and she half-heartedly said yes.

Well, I got the sign I'd asked for, and I very gently warned her to be very, VERY careful about getting married. Even leaving me out of it, I don't want to see her go through what I just went through the past three years.

The Lord will provide. She even offered to set me up with her friend. What the hell. Can't hurt. I'll be leaving this shithole in April, anyway, especially now that my one reason to stay is gone.

I'm just glad that it happened before I spent $500+! That's an Aimpont, baby!

ETA: I'll never understand women. I know what I am, and more than one woman has told me that any woman would have to be nuts not to snatch me up, and yet "the one" continues to elude me. The fact I fall to quickly doesn't help. I wasn't kidding when I said I'm an incurrable romantic.

Real bummer....

I'm a little lost, I guess. So, nine months ago she told you this? And yet you've continued to try to change her mind?
or am I way off base.

Anyway...Hang in there. There's more than one "someone" for everyone, I'm convinced of that. You just have to be patient.

Posted: 12/13/2005 12:27:27 PM EDT

[#32]

Nine months ago she simply turned off.

It's taken me this long for her to finally say it.

Posted: 12/13/2005 12:45:48 PM EDT

[#33]

Sorry to here it. There is someone out there for you.

Posted: 12/13/2005 12:49:06 PM EDT

[#34]

Don't keep it a secret! Where is she?

Posted: 12/13/2005 1:37:31 PM EDT

[#35]

"NEXT!"

(It's one of the most useful words in the English language.)

Posted: 12/13/2005 1:38:33 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:
"NEXT!"

(It's one of the most useful words in the English language.)

Zaph...wasn't meant to be...you'll find her.

Posted: 12/13/2005 1:54:30 PM EDT

[#37]

I just asked one of her employees out.

SHE was so shocked she almost fell over. She'll get back to me. Sigh....

Posted: 12/13/2005 2:05:43 PM EDT

[#38]

You're trying too hard brother!

I know its not what you want to hear but you should focus on the upsides... You can do whatever you want, whenever you want! You can buy as many guns as you can afford! You can go shooting whenever you want!! You can eat pizza and beer on the couch in your underpants and watch war movies with your guns!!

The right one is out there and she'll make it all worth it. Just gotta wait.

Posted: 12/13/2005 2:22:00 PM EDT

[#39]

Quoted:
You're trying too hard brother!

I know its not what you want to hear but you should focus on the upsides... You can do whatever you want, whenever you want! You can buy as many guns as you can afford! You can go shooting whenever you want!! You can eat pizza and beer on the couch in your underpants and watch war movies with your guns!!

The right one is out there and she'll make it all worth it. Just gotta wait.

how wise, lfodnh

a

for you zaphod--patience, grasshopper

Posted: 12/13/2005 2:30:38 PM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
Well, it looks like I won't have to bother.

I had asked God that if she wasn't the one, then I wanted to hear it straight from her own mouth.

Well, today I did.

I submit. So be it.

Funny. I feel a lot better than I thought I would. Not that I feel good, mind you.

Thanks again for all the help, everyone.

Sigh...... Back on the market again. God, I HATE this shit.

You are $$$$ ahead. Now check out Geico!

Posted: 12/13/2005 3:28:56 PM EDT

[#41]

Things probably would have ended differently if you'd bought her that romantic tractor.

Well, you should never date a woman from Thanksgiving through Valentine's Day anyway. That's just a lot of boring parties, expensive gifts that give her the wrong ideas, and dinners with her family. The "season" is from March through October.

Posted: 12/13/2005 6:17:36 PM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:
You can eat pizza and beer on the couch in your underpants and watch war movies with your guns!!

Holy smoke!

You got a camera in here?

Posted: 12/13/2005 7:48:08 PM EDT

[#43]

Sorry, Zaph.

If it makes you feel any better, I'll never understand women, either.

Posted: 12/14/2005 1:14:33 PM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:
Things probably would have ended differently if you'd bought her that romantic tractor.

Well, you should never date a woman from Thanksgiving through Valentine's Day anyway. That's just a lot of boring parties, expensive gifts that give her the wrong ideas, and dinners with her family. The "season" is from March through October.

I don't know how or why EB puts up with you.

Must be the uniform.

Cuz it damn sure ain't your charming personality.

Posted: 12/14/2005 1:39:17 PM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Things probably would have ended differently if you'd bought her that romantic tractor.

Well, you should never date a woman from Thanksgiving through Valentine's Day anyway. That's just a lot of boring parties, expensive gifts that give her the wrong ideas, and dinners with her family. The "season" is from March through October.

I don't know how or why EB puts up with you.

Must be the uniform. Cuz it damn sure ain't your charming personality.

I'm living proof that good girls go for bad boys.

Posted: 12/14/2005 2:42:58 PM EDT

[#46]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Things probably would have ended differently if you'd bought her that romantic tractor.

Well, you should never date a woman from Thanksgiving through Valentine's Day anyway. That's just a lot of boring parties, expensive gifts that give her the wrong ideas, and dinners with her family. The "season" is from March through October.

I don't know how or why EB puts up with you.

Must be the uniform. Cuz it damn sure ain't your charming personality.

I'm living proof that good girls go for bad boys.