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Posted: 12/29/2001 2:29:51 PM EDT
After reading all the funny threads on how people were handling telemarketers, I guess I have become hardbitten.

I am so sick of these people with their, "You have just won X," spiels that I just angrily shout "Scoundrel!" and slam the phone down.

How are the fine people at AR15.COM handling them?

[chainsawkill]
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 2:45:53 PM EDT
[#1]
Myself, personally I let my telephone answering machine screen all my calls.  If I want to talk to them, I will pickup the phone, otherwise, they will have leave a message and I will call them back(NOT).  Most of my friends and legit companies will leave a message directed to the person they want to contact.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 3:07:29 PM EDT
[#2]
Anonymous call block and caller ID really helps. I never put my phone number on any sort of application. I have a onebox.com voicemail account for that. If per chance someone slips through, I have a great telemarketing script of my own given to me by my Amway freak sister. I just proceed to recite the script to sell them into a great moneymaking opportunity. That usually catches them offguard.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 3:29:00 PM EDT
[#3]
i just hangup and if the call back i hang up agien evently they stop calling since i dont even bother to humor them
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 3:40:04 PM EDT
[#4]
I proceed to turn their scheme against them- I try to sell them driveway sealing- for only
$99.99..with a lifetime warranty against water damage..installed in 24 hours.. any time anywhere... I persist until they hang up... they never call back...
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 4:22:19 PM EDT
[#5]
This same debate came up 2 nights ago. I was at my In-laws (outlaws) celebrating my wifes birthday when the phone rang. Father in law answers (he's a minister so he is very polite) and proceeds to tell the lady on the phone 13 times (we counted) "no thankyou" finally he just hung up. Five minutes went by and the phone rang again, my father in-law told the telemarketer that they would have to speak to his son in-law who handles his accounts. I get on the phone and say "this is hubert" the moron on the phone pauses and says "oh yes, Hubert your name is right here..... (thats not even my name) I let him give me his song and dance and tell him "oh you will have to speak to his mistress" and I hand the phone to my sister in law. That phone made the rounds at the table that night.

Next time they get a telemarketer they will give the phone to their chinese exchange student to converse with in Chinese!!

idaho-ar15
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 4:31:11 PM EDT
[#6]
Three Words:  FREE PHONE SEX.

That's right.  If a young lady (by the sound of her voice calls), don't let slip the opportunity for some good old conversation of a personal nature.

When they call me, I usually say: "excuse me, but what are your wearing?"

"What?"
"What are you wearing?"
"A blouse."
"No, under that.  What are you wearing?"

And so it continues until the young lady;
a) gets confused and embarassed and hangs up.
b) gets nasty (in which case, you win) and hangs up.
c) continues to speak.

Remember, THEY CALLED YOU.

Honestly.  I do this all the time, and my wife loves it.

However, when an old lady calls telling me I'm pre-approved for yada-yada mastercard.  I yell into the phone, "and you've been preapproved to SUCK MY DICK!!!"

Now, get to work.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 4:37:42 PM EDT
[#7]
I have one of those Tele-zappers...
Every time the phone is picked up, it emits a special audible tone that disables the telemarketer's computerized dialer...
It makes their computer think that they called a fax machine, and the call ends immediately...
Also, it deletes my number from their files...

Best money ever spent !!!
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 4:38:38 PM EDT
[#8]
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 5:49:23 PM EDT
[#9]
If you really want to get rid of them the magic words are "take me off your phone list". Theyre required by law to cease calling you, and to maintain a list of opt-out phone numbers.

works great.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 6:28:05 PM EDT
[#10]
Kinda funny actually because I just got a prank call saying that they were from a local radio station (z100), i was on air live, adn that i'd just won a pair of blazer tickets. lol



i hung up a couple seconds afterwords...
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 7:03:45 PM EDT
[#11]
I love it when telemarketers call. I ask them if they sell anything that removes blood from carpeting because I need it ASAP.

I've told female callers that it's hard to concentrate on what they are saying cause my woman is giving me head a the moment and can they please call back in a little while.

I've also pretended to have Tourrette's Syndrome. That one is fun.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 7:18:42 PM EDT
[#12]
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 7:35:32 PM EDT
[#13]
My answering machine screens all calls.  I don't even talk to them anymore.
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 9:02:07 PM EDT
[#14]
My first reply to an unwanted call is "How did you get this number and did you know this phone line is for official gov. use only and you may be fined $500.00 for improper use?".  I never hear from them again.  Try it, you'll like it!
Link Posted: 12/29/2001 10:10:49 PM EDT
[#15]
what I do is when they call for my dad I just act like I called them and proceed to finish my order, you know the whole "no I want two extra larges not 3 and put peparonies and anchovieson the second one". its great everytime that they try to explain that they called you and tell you about what they are selling you just completely ignore them. ignore them and come up with somthing like "so if its not here in 30 minutes do I get it free".

reminds me of a trick I played on the pay phones down at ft jackson. some jerk ratted me and a friend out for somthing small and made a big deal about it and got the di's on our asses. we got his phones parents phone number some how I don't even remember. finally we called his collect and told his mother that we just wanted to tell him that "my name is george and me and you son are in love and a going to get married". mom was fun but it really got interesting when dad (the cop) got on the phone. plus we locked the key to his locker in his locker with all his personal things. he never did prove that we did either of the above.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 12:29:44 AM EDT
[#16]
I had a woman from a local home repair contractor call a few weeks ago and she told me that they had some guys doing some siding work in the neighborhood and would like for them to come by and give me an estimate for siding on my house, which BTW is brick.  She then asked when would be a good time for them to come by.  I told her whenever they got ready.  She then asked for my address and then asked for directions to the neighborhood.  I  asked her why they needed directions to the neighborhood if they were already working in the neighborhood.  Finally, I told her that I was homeless and lived in a cardboard box behind the local grocery store and that she had called a payphone.  

Also, we use to get telemarketers calling asking for my wife's sister who lives and works in Washington DC.  Finally got them to stop calling when I told them that she was my sister-in-law but that they had caught us right in the middle of a threesome.  The woman quickly apologized and hung up.  That was the last call asking for my sister-in-law.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 12:36:44 AM EDT
[#17]
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 5:14:51 AM EDT
[#18]
Phone rings, you pick it up and say "hello." If there isn't an [b]immediate[/b] answer, hang up.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 5:46:28 AM EDT
[#19]
I suppose it's kinda cheesy, but I like to use the line from that Metallica/Napster Bad!  cartoon that was wandering around the internet a couple years ago:

"Fuckin Metallica here, GO!!!!"

They usually hang up.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 6:03:31 AM EDT
[#20]
I was working third shift and the same woman called me 3 times in a row about 0900. I told her I would talk to her later and asked for her home phone number. She gave me her 1800 number at work. I told her I wanted her home number so I could call her about 0200 in the morning and wake her up like she did me. She did'nt call back.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 6:44:16 AM EDT
[#21]
My old man used to get really surly and say "You're not fooling me buddy, I know who your are. Your that guy seeing my wife behind my back. Yeah, didn't think I knew about that, did ya? Well I got news for you. I just about got who you are figured out." No matter how much they insisted they did not know what he was talking about, he would just come back with something like, "Hey buddy, you're not fooling anybody, I know what's going on. How stupid do you think I am?" They always gave up after a few minutes and rarely called back.


My favorite was from my brother who recieved a call about insurance on his credit card account. He asked, "Is this so, if I die, my credit card is paid off?" "Exactly"' the guy responded, sure he just made the sale. My brother responded, "If I'm dead, I really don't care if my credit card is paid off or not." The guy gave up and never called back.
Link Posted: 12/30/2001 7:30:51 AM EDT
[#22]
If you ask them to remove your number from their calling calling list the must by law do so and you will never get another call from them again. I have done this and it works.

Does anyone know how to get the real return addresses of SPAM E-mailers? That shit annoys me!
Link Posted: 1/2/2002 8:43:31 PM EDT
[#23]
don't ever reply to a spammer. they'll just put you on the 'active email address' list and sell it and you'll get more.

it's just not worth it to put you email address in any public place these days.
Link Posted: 1/2/2002 8:54:14 PM EDT
[#24]
It is now  law here in ca.You can be added to a do not call list.I'll  believe it when the phone stops ringin.I like the phone sex idea will have to try that
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