User Panel
Posted: 10/22/2001 4:54:54 PM EDT
I witnessed something today I've never seen in the 18 years I've been with my wife.
I was entering phase 2 of a covert gun buy and everything was going according to plan. I came home from running an errand and went to the garage. Next thing I know there she is. The first words out of her mouth are "Are you buying another gun?" It's a good thing I wasn't holding anything because I would have dropped it. I faked to the right..dodged to the left and replied.."I was thinking about it..why?" "They called with the transfer number" She then proceeded to tear me a new one and stormed off. Well I was standing in the garage trying to decide ..sleep in the truck or on the couch she hollers out to me.."supper is ready". I went through the door low and fast expecting supper to be delivered in an airborne frying pan. There she is at the table all cheerful and talkative..like nothing happened. This is like 15 minutes after she was in Tazmainian Devil mode in the garage. that was over 3 hours ago and she is still in a good mood. I'm getting really nervous here guys. I've never seen her do a 180 that fast. Anyone else experience this before?[BD] edited cause it's hard to type looking over your shoulder. |
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Maybe give the dog a little bit of that dinner to test it out...beware!
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Uh-oh!
The "nice" treatment. You're really in for it! If she brings out the red lacey teddy make a run for it! Y'know...if you collected Glocks, they all look alike to help on those CGB's - Robbie * Covert Gun Buy |
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She's making a plan.Perhaps she is aware of the saying:"Revenge is a dish best served cold."
Remember: If it has tits or wheels, it'll give you trouble. BP |
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How was she 28 days ago? I get this every 28 days myself!!!!!!!!!!!
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Ah yes, one of the pitfalls of marriage. [:O]
How well can you sleep with one of your eyes open.[?][?] ColtShorty GOA KABA COA JPFO SAF NRA "I won't be wronged, I won't be insulted and I won't be laid a hand on. I don't do these things to other people and I require the same from them." |
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Hand her the checkbook and credit card .... She wants SOMETHING !!!!!
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[b]OH YES I HAVE!!!!!!![/b]
One of two things is going on. 1. She has accepted that fact that you are a liar when it comes to guns. 2. There is something really expensive that she wants...and you [i]will[/i] be buying it for her. This is how my wife is now, every time I buy a new gun she gets the same amount of money to spend as I did on the gun. This arrangement works for me. BTW I am looking at getting a CZ75 pistol for $100 soon![;)] sgtar15 |
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... Oh yes, I remember those days.
... my most popular line was: [size=2]"No honey, I've had [i]that[/i] one for years"[/size=2] |
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Like Dostoevski's Grand Inquisitor, who asked of the people, "Do you want bread- or freedom?", at some point she will ask you the same, albeit rephrased, magic question: "Do you want guns- or me?"
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Quoted: what is a covert gun buy? View Quote ... you would have to be married to understand! |
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beanbagger, you're not married, are you... [:D]
Striker, how old is she? [i](The antibiotics aren't a bad idea)[/i] |
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Quoted: what is a covert gun buy? View Quote Lets put it this way, ... you have more guns than you can afford to shoot, you cant get them all in your gunsafe with out stacking them on top of each other, .. your wife doesnt believe you need or have as many as youve got , ... BUT theres this sweet little _________ (fill in the blank)at the gun shop, that you just got to have to fill that nonexistant hole in your collection ......... |
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Give her pleasure tonight like she has never had pleasure before. Then do it again. In the morning, surprise her with breakfast in bed and some flowers. Then after she finishes breakfast, pleasure her once more.
That worked for me when my SO found out about my Sig 220. And it worked when she found out about my CZ 75. Damn, I think if I buy another gun my tongue is going to fall off. If you ain't into that, just let her buy something semi-expensive and be done with it. |
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She has figured out some way to turn this to her advantage.
Immediately start complaining about how little money you have. Also, let the dog test any food she prepares for you. Somehow, someway, you are about to take a hit. |
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Quoted: Hand her the checkbook and credit card .... She wants SOMETHING !!!!! View Quote [b]and I bet she's GONNA get it[/b] [;)] Jamie |
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Covert gun buys are usually the only way I can get another piece of steel pleasure in the house. The attic works wonders for a hiding place temp. Its a faze women go thru, they have the things they like and we have ours. Jus do what the guy above said pleasure her till she crumples from exhaustion. Who knows maybe you will get to buy more guns and more often.
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Quoted: This is how my wife is now, every time I buy a new gun she gets the same amount of money to spend as I did on the gun. This arrangement works for me. sgtar15 View Quote I think I'm going to try this. It is fair and will take away her only argument. Although I just went to the kitchen for a snack and she insisted I try some chocolate macaroons. |
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Its good to know that I'm not the only one who has to keep my gun dealings Covert at home.[beer]
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Quoted: Ahhh... The joys of being SINGLE!!! View Quote |
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Winston_Wolf: .... my most popular line was: "No honey, I've had [i]that[/i] one for years" View Quote That was one of my favorites too,,, but it stopped working a long time ago. Then I spent over five or six thousand bucks on safes, & thought I was in the clear (THAT didn't work out too long). Ever disassemble a new Bushmaster & have to smuggle the prohibited parts into your own house?!? [i]That's when you truly realize the genius of Eugene Stoner....[/i] |
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[size=3]HEEHEE, Once again this sight bring laughter when I'am a little down.
I'am having chest pain here, laughing so hard!! I'am thinking she's wants something and is setting you up for it. The next week or so, you should approach with caution. [:D][/size=3] [size=4]GOOD LUCK, keep us posted![/size=4] |
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Quoted: That worked for me when my SO found out about my Sig 220. And it worked when she found out about my CZ 75. Damn, I think if I buy another gun my tongue is going to fall off. View Quote LOL! This is too funny. |
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Don't you boys start feelin like the Lone Ranger. I'm a dealer and about 70-80% of my customers do covert buys. "Don't ever call up and say anything about pickin up guns, my wife will kill me!"
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Well, I had this ALL figured out...walk out of the house with a empty case and tell her you`re goin` shootin........the rest is easy...this worked SO good....till the day she said...."I`m going with you"..........[grenade]
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OK, I know what happened...She feels bad about yelling at you. After all, if it makes you happy, she should be happy for you. It doesn't make any difference to her if you have a new toy. Your hobby doesn't include cold whiskey or loose women, so what's the harm? You don't hassle her about shoes or purses or whatever...GOD knows she got too many of those....
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Just kidding....Watch Out! |
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Quoted: OK, I know what happened...She feels bad about yelling at you. After all, if it makes you happy, she should be happy for you. It doesn't make any difference to her if you have a new toy. Your hobby doesn't include cold whiskey or loose women, so what's the harm? You don't hassle her about shoes or purses or whatever...GOD knows she got too many of those.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Just kidding....Watch Out! View Quote your a sick man 40BOY[:)] |
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Really?
It took you 18 years to find this out? Took me only about 18 minutes with my wife. It is the set-up man.............the set-up before the kill.................I would not sleep were I you. BTW.................I am a fucking idiot anyhow and everything that ever goes wrong with anything or anyone is certainly never due to any direct fault of said thing or person....oh God forbid it!.....it is alfuckingways because of something I did wrong. So you should ignore my ass! |
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Quoted: Well, I had this ALL figured out...walk out of the house with a empty case and tell her you`re goin` shootin........the rest is easy...this worked SO good....till the day she said...."I`m going with you"..........[grenade] View Quote You could try getting a double case, and keep one gun in it. If she wants to go with you, then you have one but you need to stop at the shop to pick up some ammo and arrange to pick up the new one later. Course I don't have to do this since I'm single. [:|][:\][:)][:D][:|] |
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As from the movie BraveHeart.
"I dont know about me, but I am pretty sure your fuucked." I have just spent the last 5 days being a badasss, cost me dearly. I am slowly being able to get back up. God I thought I was dead meat. She is being nice, and that makes her the most dangerous women in existence. As Bruce Lee would say , "BE LIKE WATER MY FRIEND; LIKE WATER." Man modern PSY-OPS doctrine was written by married guys , I would bet my life on it. But rest assurred if you know her you will know what she is going to do before she does it. Set up an Ambush. THEN BEG FOR YOUR LIFE. Be the LION who makes himself look like the mouse. Never admit your wrong<--- I did this once and it emboldened her to the point where she attacked even harder. BuT you lied. You should never lie. Now anything she does you have comming and deserve it. You have already lost the battle. I don't know. That is tuff. Ben READ SUN TSU "The ARt OF WAR" quickly. Before she does. |
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In situations like this, there's only one thing to do - lie like you've never lied before!!!! Tell her the transfer is because you're [b][i]selling[/i][/b] a gun to buy her that diamond tennis bracelet she wants, but now she's spoiled the surprize. Then you better come home with that bracelet if you want to live!!!!
There's a thread you need to read - http://[url]http://www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?id=63027[/url] Be afraid, be very afraid!!! I'd go with that "dog tasting your food" suggestion. [:D] |
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Quoted: Go on antibiotics immediately. View Quote Yup, I agree. Go to the emergency room now. Did dinner taste funny or have that roasted almond smell in you drink. |
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Admit to nothing, deny everything, and make counter accusations!
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Let me get this straight...
Your wife goes completely nuts on you, You're thinking you are about to become a divorcee or dead man, She nicely says to you that dinner's ready, And you go inside and EAT it? Quick man, only one thing to do here!!! [puke][puke][puke][puke][puke][puke][puke][puke] Steyr Aug, you better regurgitate that grub before it ends you! Steyr Aug? Buddy? ... |
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Quoted: Ahhh... The joys of being SINGLE!!! View Quote Ditto brother...ditto!! |
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You mean you can still get guns up there in the "Great White North" ? What can you still buy legally up there ?
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Get a new wife!! I guess I got lucky, my wife buyes me guns. A couple of weeks ago she bought me a Winchester 30-30 for my [bday]. God I LOVE my wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Be prepared to be beaten with phone books in your sleep as not to leave any markings. Of course, my alternative isn't really much better. I don't lie to my wife about guns, because she likes them too. So, we talk about what we want to get, and we get it. Of course, my ammo costs have doubled, but worse things could happen I suppose.
God Bless Texas |
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OK what are the odds Striker makes it through the night and who's gonna hold all the money?
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Quoted: As from the movie BraveHeart. "I dont know about me, but I am pretty sure your fuucked." View Quote Nahhh... its like this man: "The Lord says he can get me out of this mess... but he's pretty sure you're fvckeÞ" Steven was my fav character in that movie It's MY ISLAND!! [%(] |
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Yes, I had that trouble with mine, she said "it me or the guns" I Love my new Colt 6731 just put a new red dot oko on it today as a matter of fact. I picked out my new girl friend because she's got a hot body and is brain dead, I've now begain molding her brain, hell, when somebody says diamonds, she drags me of to the gun store, she LOVES guns not diamonds, yes boys, the book will be out soon, watch for it in better book stores everywhere, heeeee!!!
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