All this talk about the Beck bar-be-cue and nosy neighbors has me seriously concerned.  I keep hearing things on the news like: "neighbors are reported to have seen Beck loading 'high-powered' rifles into the trunk of his car."

Therefore, in an effort to get along better with my neighbors (and avoid an inevitable and painful death) I have decided to trade in all of my evil black 'high-powered' rifles in exchange for some more benevolent firearms that will not cause such disturbance or that 'queasy feeling' in the stomachs of liberals.

I'm looking for weapons that can wound or irritate, but not cause serious bodily harm or death.  Here is what I've come up with, please help me out with more options.

This is my best option so far:

[img]http://www.1bbgunblowout.com/daisy_4.jpg[/img]

I'm still a little uneasy about the next two, as I'm worried that they fall under the classification of "assault pistols":

[img]http://www.supersoaker.com/basicsite/images/cpszooka.jpg[/img]

[img]http://www.nerfcenter.com/photos/previews/rf20lg.jpg[/img]

The one above also has a selector for rapid vs. single, so I believe this may also be classified as a 'Machine gun'.

Looks like illegal weapons. The cops have been called.
[img]wsphotofews.excite.com/029/Tb/pR/et/qZ17499.jpg[/img]

Constructing a "low-powered" assault rifle:
1. Obtain materials: a straw and a piece of paper. For your own comfort tissue paper works best.
2. Wad up about 1 sq. in. of paper and insert in mouth.
3. Moisten in mouth while rolling with tongue to form a ball shape.
4. Insert straw in mouth, and force the wet wad into the straw.

You are now ready to fire the "low-powered" assault rifle.

Aim at a nearby individual. The basic version has no sights(which makes chucky schumer happy), so you must aim by intuition, what we would call point fire. Horizontal alignment is easy to gauge but vertical alignment requires experience and perhaps multiple shots.

5.Blow hard into the straw.

Repeat 2-5 for subsequent shots.

Hey hey now!  

I know you are doing this for the good of the children, but wait and let me explain myself.

I'm just LOOKING right now, I don't actually own any of the weapons pictured above...

HK
What I do is reload all my ammo with primers only.  The report is very low and bullets never even leave the bbl.
Bill