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Posted: 3/27/2006 7:35:35 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/27/2006 7:37:25 PM EDT by Planerench]
As many of you know, I fly small aircraft for a living. I fly photo missions, traffic watch, police survelance, and aerial banners. Yesterday I flew a billboard (12' by 60') for two hours over the valley covering a little over half of it at a half mile offset traveling north, south and offsetting west to east each pass. Monday, my customer gets this little gem.

"Congratulations on attracting attention with a plane with a banner in the air. Unfortunately for you, it's not positive attention. I'm sick of your stupid-ass advertising disrupting the peace and quiet of my home in Bristol Heights. Not only would I never use you, I will encourage everyone I know not to use you. Furthermore, if I see your plane over my home again, I'll call the police and file a noise complaint.

This is not a message inviting you to have any sort of business relationship with me. If you e-mail me, I'll report you as spammers."


The mission is flown at 1000' AGL, the speed and power settings are quite low and half the people I fly over don't even look up. I look up this guy's subdivision and it is located at the intersection of two of the valley's busiest thoroughfares. I know the general area well because it all used to be farm land and I grew up about three miles away from this numb-nut back when the roads were uncrowded two lane rural roads with potholes and the town had a stop sign at it's major intersection. Heck, it even had a flashing red light at that intersection!

This guy lives in one of the medium to upper class neighbor hoods springing up due to the influx of out of state folks (mostly from California) that have moved here for the quality of life but have drug along with them a piece of the city. Guess what pal! The stuff I do is because of you and your neighbors moving here, clogging the roads, providing dense populations to advertise to, and requiring extensive use of photography for land development! If you wanted peace and quiet you should have moved to Lowman! But numb-nuts like that won't move to the real quiet places because they get snowed in and don't get plowed out because of the few number of residents. [rant off]

PS I fly this particular banner once a month. Usually over different parts of the valley. It has been nearly two months since I flew it AT ALL!
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 7:38:51 PM EDT
Find someone with a Jet warbird to do an overflight of his house....
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 7:40:18 PM EDT
Dont matter, If he calles into 9-1-1, a good dispatcher will tell him that he needs to call the FAA...

Link Posted: 3/27/2006 7:41:28 PM EDT

Originally Posted By KA3B:
Find someone with a Jet warbird to do an overflight of his house....



My wife just confiscated my water balloons. Damn. And I am so careful to keep them in the freezer to keep them from going bad.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 7:43:23 PM EDT

Originally Posted By R-32:
Dont matter, If he calles into 9-1-1, a good dispatcher will tell him that he needs to call the FAA...




I was going to e-mail him and give him the names and numbers of the manager of the tower and the FSDO and my name and warn him that they will both be fighting back laughter when he calls to complain. I happen to be on good terms with all the local FAA guys.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 7:45:36 PM EDT
Any chance you could feather the props a bit and beat the air more for him?
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:11:28 PM EDT
Few things piss me off more than asswipes who bitch about small planes and GA activity at airports. Fuck him. I wish he lived near me, so I could hang it off the fucking prop above his house right at 1k AGL.

Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:15:06 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
Few things piss me off more than asswipes who bitch about small planes and GA activity at airports. Fuck him. I wish he lived near me, so I could hang it off the fucking prop above his house right at 1k AGL.




But would you put your erect penis on his cheek.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:18:14 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/27/2006 8:21:23 PM EDT by Paul]
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:20:17 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Planerench:

Originally Posted By R-32:
Dont matter, If he calles into 9-1-1, a good dispatcher will tell him that he needs to call the FAA...




I was going to e-mail him and give him the names and numbers of the manager of the tower and the FSDO and my name and warn him that they will both be fighting back laughter when he calls to complain. I happen to be on good terms with all the local FAA guys.



Do it! Treat it like a formal complaint!

Sooo... what do the local police think of folks calling 911 with bogus complaints....
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:22:40 PM EDT
you probably interrupted his busy afternoon of watching jerry springer and judge mathis.


almost as bad as the assholes who complain about USAF jets flying over their house.

the AFB was there BEFORE you moved in and you knew that! STFU!
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:43:04 PM EDT
I sense that this guy will wind up in the funniest police stories thread when one of our fellow LEO members goes to his house to respond to the call.

"OFFICER IT WAS AN AIRPLANE IN THE AIR AND IT WAS SENDING ME MESSAGES!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!! OR I'LL GO GET ONE OF THOSE .50 CAL RIFLES AND SHOOT IT DOWN!"
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:47:32 PM EDT
Too bad you can't dump a shitter tank on his house.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 8:52:40 PM EDT
I just had this evil mental picture of sprinkling a bag of flour over the guy's house. OK, I'm gonna go wash my brain out with soap & water now.

Paul, that's a GREAT picture! I should steal the idea and make my own.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 10:50:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Tromatic:
Too bad you can't dump a shitter tank on his house.




...or a Boeing Bomb!
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 10:55:22 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Lord_Grey_Boots:

Do it! Treat it like a formal complaint!

Sooo... what do the local police think of folks calling 911 with bogus complaints....



In your neck of the woods (mine also) they dont do a damn thing.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 10:56:50 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PinePig:

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
Few things piss me off more than asswipes who bitch about small planes and GA activity at airports. Fuck him. I wish he lived near me, so I could hang it off the fucking prop above his house right at 1k AGL.




But would you put your erect penis on his cheek.



Goddamn . . . I had almost managed to forget about that.

You're sick PeteCO! Cock-poser!
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 11:08:31 PM EDT
"WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH.

Sincerely,

Wahwah Wah."


$10 says it was a woman.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 11:17:36 PM EDT

Originally Posted By R-32:
Dont matter, If he calles into 9-1-1, a good dispatcher will tell him that he needs to call the FAA...




Yep or tell him to go get bent depending on what kind of night I've had.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 11:19:23 PM EDT
I'm sure he has an illegal weapons cache at his compound. Sic the BATFE on him...

Just Kidding. That's as bad an idea as daring him to sic the FAA on you. In case you need reminding, There are 3 agencies that work from the premise: guilty until proven innocent: ATF, IRS, and FAA. Never a good idea to rattle any of those cages, no matter who your "friends" may be.

Props to to you on your chosen career. Unless we have any Alaskan crab fishermen on the board, you hold the honor and distinction of "most dangerous job" Stay safe.
Link Posted: 3/27/2006 11:22:24 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Skibane:

Originally Posted By Tromatic:
Too bad you can't dump a shitter tank on his house.



img354.imageshack.us/img354/9688/boeingbomb5pw.jpg
...or a Boeing Bomb!



!!!!

"See there's a peanut right there!!"

GREAT movie... think I'll go watch it right now.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 3:46:20 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BillofRights:
I'm sure he has an illegal weapons cache at his compound. Sic the BATFE on him...

Just Kidding. That's as bad an idea as daring him to sic the FAA on you. In case you need reminding, There are 3 agencies that work from the premise: guilty until proven innocent: ATF, IRS, and FAA. Never a good idea to rattle any of those cages, no matter who your "friends" may be.

Props to to you on your chosen career. Unless we have any Alaskan crab fishermen on the board, you hold the honor and distinction of "most dangerous job" Stay safe.



I am also finishing up nearly 9 hours of flying today. Nine hours airborne. I am tired. It will be funny in the morning.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 4:03:38 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/28/2006 4:04:37 AM EDT by Kharn]

Originally Posted By DrFrige:

Originally Posted By Skibane:

Originally Posted By Tromatic:
Too bad you can't dump a shitter tank on his house.


img354.imageshack.us/img354/9688/boeingbomb5pw.jpg
...or a Boeing Bomb!


!!!!
"See there's a peanut right there!!"
GREAT movie... think I'll go watch it right now.



Kharn
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 11:41:16 AM EDT
OK guys got a plan. We were brainstorming at the shop today and my buddy Roy says, "If he is going to call the cops next time, tow a banner for the cops!". Support your Ada county sheriff or some such message.

I thought it was brilliant! If I hit his town for a couple of hours and he calls the cops, what is he going to say? Get your damn completely legal, support cops banner out of my sky!?
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 11:53:12 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BillofRights:
I'm sure he has an illegal weapons cache at his compound. Sic the BATFE on him...

Just Kidding. That's as bad an idea as daring him to sic the FAA on you. In case you need reminding, There are 3 agencies that work from the premise: guilty until proven innocent: ATF, IRS, and FAA. Never a good idea to rattle any of those cages, no matter who your "friends" may be.

Props to to you on your chosen career. Unless we have any Alaskan crab fishermen on the board, you hold the honor and distinction of "most dangerous job" Stay safe.



Both my parents have flown and my dad has a small craft license. With all the cops, soldiers, fire fighters, paramedics, and private investigators on this board, I can't quite see why flying a banner around for nine hours qualifies as the most dangerous job.

Also, we have at least two members that I know of who have done Alaskan crab fishing.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:31:44 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Swindle1984:

Originally Posted By BillofRights:
I'm sure he has an illegal weapons cache at his compound. Sic the BATFE on him...

Just Kidding. That's as bad an idea as daring him to sic the FAA on you. In case you need reminding, There are 3 agencies that work from the premise: guilty until proven innocent: ATF, IRS, and FAA. Never a good idea to rattle any of those cages, no matter who your "friends" may be.

Props to to you on your chosen career. Unless we have any Alaskan crab fishermen on the board, you hold the honor and distinction of "most dangerous job" Stay safe.



Both my parents have flown and my dad has a small craft license. With all the cops, soldiers, fire fighters, paramedics, and private investigators on this board, I can't quite see why flying a banner around for nine hours qualifies as the most dangerous job.

Also, we have at least two members that I know of who have done Alaskan crab fishing.



From the Department of Labor I believe. Pilots are like second or third after loggers on the mortality list. Cops aren't even close. I don't think paramedics even make the short list. BTW I flew the banner two hours on Sunday. The nine hours on Monday were four hours of traffic watch (had a 727 pass over this morning with about 500' vertical separation and 300' horizontal separation from behind and this happens all the time) and six hours of photo flight cross country (Sawtooth range) in a single engine Cessna. You do the math.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:36:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Planerench:
-snip-

PS I fly this particular banner once a month. Usually over different parts of the valley. It has been nearly two months since I flew it AT ALL!



That guy seems a little touchy for sure. He's obviously never had his bucolic peace shattered by a group of lawyers and insurance salesmen wannabe bikers blasting by his house in loud Harleys on a Sunday morning. Oh wait, that's every Sunday and Saturday for me.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:39:15 PM EDT
Do you have his email address? We here at arfcom would surely like to let him know we appreciate his delicate sensibilities.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:39:22 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Schulze:

Originally Posted By Planerench:
-snip-

PS I fly this particular banner once a month. Usually over different parts of the valley. It has been nearly two months since I flew it AT ALL!



That guy seems a little touchy for sure. He's obviously never had his bucolic peace shattered by a group of lawyers and insurance salesmen wannabe bikers blasting by his house in loud Harleys on a Sunday morning. Oh wait, that's every Sunday and Saturday for me.



When I read the e-mail I just sat there for a minute blinking trying to connect what I was reading to what I had done. It just doesn't make any sense unless the guy has had a bad week and is venting by grabbing the only thing he can get easy hold of (my customer's web address on the billboard) and letting fly.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:40:11 PM EDT

Originally Posted By nightstalker:
Do you have his email address? We here at arfcom would surely like to let him know we appreciate his delicate sensibilities.



Let me get him to e-mail me directly and not my customer and then we'll let slip the dogs of war.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:47:42 PM EDT
At the train station I work at, the train comes down and idles all day because there is no way to set up shore power for it as it is a different length each day.

This lady that lives 3 miles away said that she could hear it and came down to the station asking if we could turn off the locomotive (which supplies power for the AC, kitchen , etc, ). We said no. Then she would wait for the train crew to arrive and harass them, then she started calling the Main office, they laughed at her. She was finally asked not to step foot on RR property.

People are weird.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:48:39 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Planerench:

Originally Posted By nightstalker:
Do you have his email address? We here at arfcom would surely like to let him know we appreciate his delicate sensibilities.



Let me get him to e-mail me directly and not my customer and then we'll let slip the dogs of war.




Fun!!

That guy sounds like your typical, homegrown, Grade A @sshole.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:53:39 PM EDT
and I'm sure someone here can turn that email address into a name and the name into a home phone number in short order
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 1:59:56 PM EDT
ohhhh FIRE MISSION!!!!
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 6:08:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/28/2006 6:10:19 PM EDT by PaDanby]
Send him an e-mail asking who you should report spammers to, since you get a lot of spam at work.

You might even thank him for his address since it gives you the 15,000 you needed to submit your latest list to the mailing list folks.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 6:11:51 PM EDT
If you can get him made enough to threaten you personally, like shooting you down or something, then the homeland security can handle him for more than he'd bargained for.
Link Posted: 3/28/2006 6:13:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Planerench:
As many of you know, I fly small aircraft for a living. I fly photo missions, traffic watch, police survelance, and aerial banners. Yesterday I flew a billboard (12' by 60') for two hours over the valley covering a little over half of it at a half mile offset traveling north, south and offsetting west to east each pass. Monday, my customer gets this little gem.

"Congratulations on attracting attention with a plane with a banner in the air. Unfortunately for you, it's not positive attention. I'm sick of your stupid-ass advertising disrupting the peace and quiet of my home in Bristol Heights. Not only would I never use you, I will encourage everyone I know not to use you. Furthermore, if I see your plane over my home again, I'll call the police and file a noise complaint.

This is not a message inviting you to have any sort of business relationship with me. If you e-mail me, I'll report you as spammers."


The mission is flown at 1000' AGL, the speed and power settings are quite low and half the people I fly over don't even look up. I look up this guy's subdivision and it is located at the intersection of two of the valley's busiest thoroughfares. I know the general area well because it all used to be farm land and I grew up about three miles away from this numb-nut back when the roads were uncrowded two lane rural roads with potholes and the town had a stop sign at it's major intersection. Heck, it even had a flashing red light at that intersection!

This guy lives in one of the medium to upper class neighbor hoods springing up due to the influx of out of state folks (mostly from California) that have moved here for the quality of life but have drug along with them a piece of the city. Guess what pal! The stuff I do is because of you and your neighbors moving here, clogging the roads, providing dense populations to advertise to, and requiring extensive use of photography for land development! If you wanted peace and quiet you should have moved to Lowman! But numb-nuts like that won't move to the real quiet places because they get snowed in and don't get plowed out because of the few number of residents. [rant off]

PS I fly this particular banner once a month. Usually over different parts of the valley. It has been nearly two months since I flew it AT ALL!



Post his email here, I'm sure a few people would like to ask him a few friendly questions
Link Posted: 3/29/2006 9:08:31 AM EDT

Originally Posted By johnrj:
If you can get him made enough to threaten you personally, like shooting you down or something, then the homeland security can handle him for more than he'd bargained for.



I had a kid laser me two years ago and the men in black had a little "meeting" with him.
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