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Posted: 3/21/2006 6:56:34 AM EDT
FROM AN IOWAN FARM KID,
NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT.


Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before maybe all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m., but am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc, but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon when you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route marches", which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. The country is nice but awful flat.

The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot.
The Capt. is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to hand combat training.
You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though,they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake.
I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds, and he's 6'8" and weighs near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.



Your loving daughter,
Gail.

Link Posted: 3/21/2006 6:59:08 AM EDT
IBTMH



Funny.....I had a feeling it was going to be a chick...Ok..I saw it was from Gail before I read it.
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 7:01:05 AM EDT
fiction
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 7:09:21 AM EDT
Fiction??? Sounds like Hollywood Marines to me

Of course Gail is a funny name for a guy ...WM's boot is at PISC
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 4:57:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By shooter0311:
Fiction??? Sounds like Hollywood Marines to me

Of course Gail is a funny name for a guy ...WM's boot is at PISC



It's kind of funny for a guy to sign his letters "Your Loving Daughter" too....
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 10:12:48 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/21/2006 10:14:38 PM EDT by Manic_Moran]
[Edited... Never mind.. Here's the Irish version...]

Welcome to at least 2004...

NTM
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 10:16:29 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 10:18:42 PM EDT
Who would name thier kids "Walt, Elmer, and GAIL"?

Wouldn't Emily, or some other name make more sense?

Gail..................................... way to "hippy-esque" for Walt and Elmer's parents.
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 10:22:39 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Manic_Moran:
[Edited... Never mind.. Here's the Irish version...]

Welcome to at least 2004...

NTM



I saw the first version before you edited and it reminded me of this. Not sure if this is like that, but it was pretty funny (just get past the idiocy of the first sentence):


Three guys -- a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden, and an American engineer
were working together one day, when they came across a lantern and a Genie pops
out of it. I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes total," says
the Genie.

The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also
farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." Pooooof! With the
blink of the Genie's eye, the land in Canada was forever made fertile for
farming.

Osama bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan,
Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious
state." Pooooof! Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, there was a huge
wall around those countries.

The American engineer says, "I am very curious. Please tell me more about
this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 5000 feet high, 500 feet
thick and completely surrounds the country. Nothing can get in or out -- it's
virtually impenetrable."

The American engineer says, "Fill it with water."

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 10:55:28 AM EDT
Here's a tip - when stupid, worn out crap shows up in your inbox, don't repost it. Sheesh.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 11:24:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
Here's a tip - when stupid, worn out crap shows up in your inbox, don't repost it. Sheesh.



Here's a tip, "Pucker up and kiss me where the sun don't shine cupcake" I thought the joke was humorous and posted it. Sorry if you didn't. Don't get your thong in a bunch.
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