Quoted: Not the worst Had him hold on to the exposed top of a sparkplug of a lawnmower i was tinkering with. Then I pulled the start cord. shocked the shit out of him.

Reminds me of when my dad told me how to turn off our pressure washer.

I was probably about 10 and my dad painted houses... I helped.  Child labor at something like $2/hour (10 years ago)... I thought I was rich.  He probably charged a good $30/hour for my labor.

Well... he told me to shut off the pressure washer while he was up on some guy's roof.  The shutoff was a grounded strap that you push with your foot to contact the spark plug.  Basically, it just shorts out the spark.

"How do I shut it off?"
"Push down on that strap!"  He never thought to tell me not to use my hand.

I'm still scared shitless whenever I have to turn that thing off!



I was the biggest asshole to my sister when I was younger... now I'm just a bit of an asshole.

She was about two years younger than me.  When we were in preschool, we had a woman and her kids come to our house to watch us.  My friend (who was a couple years older) and I dug what we thought was a huge hole.  We weren't very creative, but we told my sister:

"If you climb in that hole, close your eyes, and count to ten, you'll be in Barbie-land."

She climbed into the hole and we dragged a big piece of plywood over the hole... then I stood on it until I got bored of her crying.  Even as recent as a couple weeks ago, my sister used that very story to explain how horrible her childhood was.

ETA: Another thing I did.
I told my sister I discovered something.  I told her and her friend to come in the bathroom (get your mind out of the gutter).  I told them we had to spin in circles for thirty seconds with the lights off chanting "bloody mary" over and over... the room was pitch black.  As we were in there, I opened the drawer to the sink cabinet so the door couldn't be opened.

When the thirty seconds was up, I figured out which way the mirror was... and I pulled out a flashlight and stuck it in my mouth.  I then started to groan... they looked around, saw the reflection... the only thing they could see.  Well, if I remember correctly, they coudn't figure out how to get out of the bathroom because they were screaming and were dizzy from spinning in circles.

My friend gave me that idea.

When I was 12 my dad sent me to work on my grandfather's cattle farm for the summer.  My cousin who was 17 also worked on the farm.  One afternoon we were watching bullriding on the TV and I made the comment that most of those guys were pretty small and it didn't look all that hard to ride the bull.  My cousin readily agreed and told me that he had ridden my grandfather's brahma several times and it was a piece of cake.  

10 minutes later I'm scaling the tree the bull likes to hang out under with visions of glory in my head.  The bull wanders under the tree, I hop down and grab hold of his ears, and promptly get ejected to something simulating a low orbit.  I come down about 20 feet in front of the bull and now have to deal with a pissed off brahma heading in my direction.  I run across the field and make a leap for the fence and into safety.

Sum total- 1 sore ass, 1 dislocated shoulder, 1 deep distrust for the advice of cousins.

on the positive side my grandpa whipped the bejesus out of my cousin.  

You guys are bastards.....

Quoted: My bro used to put a half-full mason jar of water in the freezer every day and then come home and add tapwater to it after work.  one day i poured about a shot of vodka in with it before it froze... bout got my ass beat bad for that one :)  he's 5'11 330 and i'm 5'9 180ish... best bet is to run off for a while

I... don't get it. Why is that a prank? What did he do with it? What did the vodka matter?

The dirtiest I cant say.

We were running through the house playing tag. He ran into another room and then turned. I was running as fast as a 5 or 6 yo can chasing him but he was 10 ft in front of me. He waited until almost there and then slammed a glass door closed. Slicing my wrist (stitches)

7 or 8 me and him were playing at the park on the swings. As I was swinging to see how high I could get he threw the chain w/ seat attached from the next swing over so it pulled me off the swing. (Scalp stitches)

He convinced 2 other kids to hide at the top of the hill with rocks. When I rode my bike by after school they threw rocks at me. (tooth knocked out and scalp stitches)


My brother (12) and I (10) were playing around some R/R freight cars close to where we lived.
My brother climbed to the top and then called me up. As I got to the top of the ladder I saw he was laying down on the top of the frieghtcar feet facing me. I said what are doing  ? He answer "this" then kicked me in the face. Its a long way down.

Around 10 again we got some firecrackers. He lit all his off in one fell swoop. I unrolled mine from the pack one by one. After he was done with his and I told him I wouldnt give him any more. He told me to watch this then lit a match on the ground. As I looked at the ground he threw dirt in my eye's and then lit the fuse hanging out of my front pocket going to the rest of the firecrackers. Pants caught fire and much pain.

11 or 12 I wore braces and I had to wear head gear at night. I woke up one morning because my head was being sofly rocked back and forth. I though the head gear had gotten caught in the blanket again. No when I opened my eye's to see what they were caught on I saw my brother croutched down across the room by the wall. He was trying to plug an extention cord into the outlet. The extention cord was connected to my head gear by the way of alligator clips. The reason my head was rocking was because the cord was about 8" too short and didnt reach the elc. outlet. Yes he was trying to plug it in.

I could go on but it seems this has lost is fun for me.

I dont speak to him anymore.

I miss read the thread title.

I really cant remember doing anything except fight back to my brother but shit flows flows down hill and I had a little sister.

She was about 10 I was 12 and we had just moved from Mass to Puerto Rico that week. I was cutting the grass and ran over a huge ant hill with the mower, these were big ants and lots of em. I got my sister to stand in the ant pile under the guise of taking a picture to send back to Mass. Well she stood in it and nothing happened, I thought she would freak when she saw them. NOPE, So I told her to look down she saw the ants all over her feet and then stomped her feet a bunch to get them off. Anybody know what FIRE ANTS are ? I didnt have a clue what they were at the time, well she was fucked up. She had bites all up and down her legs. I swear I didnt know they were demon ants.

You got a real bummer of a brother.

You guys who watch SouthPark know that the Hitler is. Cartman would smear shit under someones nose while they are sleeping.

I did that to my brother when we were young. He couldn't figure out what smelled so bad, he spent twenty minutes looking for the cause of the stink. When I finaly thought he had enough, I said whats then under you nose. The first thing he did was start probing with his tongue. I call him Butters now.

Another time I depantsed him at the bus stop.

some of you guys were pure evil!

My friend of over 15 years told me he was going to vote for Kerry.  We couldn't have that could we?  So I signed him up to host parties for the GOP at his house, I signed him up to recieve GOP e-mails, phone calls, etc.  He had no idea why he was receiving all of this pro Bush stuff, after the election we let him in on it.  

He still gets calls from the state GOP.  

ETA: For the record I am not a serial killer, bad brother maybe, but not a serial killer.

I did some very horrible things....but as for pranks...

One of my better ones was putting on some gloves, taking a pair of Rose Clippers, and clipping some leafy stems from a Poison Oak Bush, then going into my older brothers bedroom and liberally rubbing the poison oak stems all over his sheets, pillow case, then I made sure I got most of his underwear in his dresser.

But I didn't simply stop at this, I also bought some NAIR and mixed it into his Shampoo and Conditioner.

So imagine, here is this 15 year old punk, who gets a bad case of poison oak, face is butt ugly and swollen up like a pumpkin, always scratching his balls, and his hair started to thin out a lot.

This was back in the early 70's. I didn't like my older brother very much, as he was an abusive ass_ole. However I was very sympathetic with him during this period, and told him that his hair loss was probably due to stress...

My little brother during his late teens was into body building and had to pose in every reflection he came across. It may be a mirror, store window, or what ever and he'd flex his arms and start to strut.

This got on my nerves so I had to knock him down a peg or two. He brought his hard hat and silver mirrored sunglass home every night from work and I used those to get him. Inside his glasses, I painted black with a paint marker and for his hard hat, I opened the liner as far as it'd go and stuck a thumb tack inside.

He later told me that when he got to work, all his buddies watched as he put the glasses on and couldn't see out of them. He said they really got a laugh when he put his hat on and screamed. I could just see him acting like a badass until the tack stuck in his head.

I played a prank on the nephew who was about 10 at the time. He was staying the night with us so we put the horror movie Ice Cream Man on. The movie was about an Ice Cream Truck driver that killed people, cut them into small chunks, and put the chunks in his ice cream. He had just given a Police Officer a cone and there was an eyeball looking out at the camera while the cop was eating it.

I then asked if anyone wanted an ice cream cone and in the nephews, I added a red jawbreaker. I watched as the nephew ate his and discovered "something" was in his cone. His eyes got big as he pokes his finger in it to see what it was. He got a laugh when he found out that it was harmless. He still talks about that and last Christmas we gave him a DVD of that movie.

Have em pee on the ground wire of an electric Cattle fence, SHOCKING!!!

My brother was a real dick to me, we had countless fights, he won 98% of the time. He is 4 years older.

When we used to go to the chinese restraunt, they would give us a bowl of those fried noodles and he would dip some in the hot mustard and put them on my side of the bowl.

My brother would squeeze oragel in my tooth paste tube. (i still do this to my wife and kids) Brushing your teeth and your whole damn mouth would be numb.

One time I was on the phone and my brother kept interrupting me, saying shit, so I raised the phone like I was going to hit him. He didn't back down so I smacked the reciever on his head. He got that wierd eye look like he was going to kill me. So I tried to knock him out and hit him in the back of the head before he could recover. Well shit it didn't work, I never ran so fast in all my life.

He broke my arm with a wooden katana training sword. I told my mother I slipped on the ice.

I would put ketchup packets under those knobs on the toilet seat cover so he would get red ass when he sat down.

There are many others but I'm too damn tired.

HEHE  some of these stories are awesome.  Every April Fools Day I'd switch the sugar and salt in their containers so not only did my brother start gagging when he ate his cereal but my parents would end up puking because they put so much in their coffee!!!!  I did it for atleast 5 years and they never thought of it when it came time...

Man too many memories.  I tied a rope to a Tonka Truck one time and told my little brother to pull it really fast.  Well the end of the rope was tied to a concret block too.  Horrible crash. I was about 7 or so.

I fed a whole box of chocoalte ExLax to my brother onetime when I was about 9 or 10 he was 7 or 8.  Had to call the Doctor and all that.  I got a whippin with a switch that day......Oooouch!!  I hated swithces, (especially when you had to cut your own)

I was in the back yard with a .12guage shotgun one day and my brother was at the barn feeding the cows, it is about 50 yards out in the pasture........ I yelled "Travis.....Don't look!!" and shot him with 8 shot.  I saw his coat actually sink into him.  He dropped the bucket and started feeling all over himself, I like to of passed out laughing so hard, man he was hot!  Well he got me back here.  Either I go stand by the barn and him shoot me or he'd tell Dad..... 8 shot stings pretty bad at 50yrds.  (winter time we were in coveralls)

My parents kept foster kids:

When I was about 15 I had a foster brother that was 13 and his older brother was my age. Well, remember the muscle heat from Highschool that the coaches would rub on you if you had a cramp?  This stuff made bengay feel like bengay don't work!

I talked the 13 yr old foster brother into rubbing some on his nuts for $1, his real brother was in on it too so he said he would.  He got a big hand full of it and rubbed it all over his nuts. While he was rubbing it in his brother said "I'll give you another $1 to rub it on your pecker too."  Little sucker did it.  When he finished he was saying give me my $2, give me my $2.  And for a minute that was all he said.

Then he started saying "oh man, oh man" and started taking off clothes and jumped in the shower.  He was starting to cry some then yelling for my Mom... Mom didn't know what we'd had him do so she was pretty mad, and started telling us to help him. So I told him water won't help use this, I handed him a bottle of rubbing alcohol he turned off the water and poured the rubbing alcohol straight onto his balls and peter, and SCREAMED like a banchi........ I almost died from laughing so hard.  We got in pretty bad trouble for that, but man alive it had to be the best $1 I ever spent.

One time I got an idea to pull the lead out of a .22lr and fill it with bar soap. (17 yrs old or so)  I talked another foster kid into letting me 'try it out' on him for $5.  Man, I shot him from about 7 yrds away and he hit the ground screaming!! Son, put a knot on his leg the size of a golf ball, and when he pulled his pants down there was even soap residue under his skin!!! (Irish Spring)  I was pretty worried about the wound it left so...... I had to give him another $5 hush money, but the other foster kids pitched in cause it was so funny.

Edit to say: You can't get a kid off the couch today for $5 much less have them creative enough to prank each other.  And even brothers/sibilings don't play together as much these days.  This is a great thread, glad you came up with it fxntime.

Shortly after my brother got engaged, his fince and I flew down to San Diego to go to a wedding.  lo and behold on the airplane happened to be a girl we had known for years and the sister of a guy I had worked with.  Both were significantly better looking than my future sis-in-law.  I got them to go out into the baggage claim area before us and both see him and then act like he was their boyfriend and then get into a fight over him.  And just before it got "violent" his fiance and I walked around the corner and saw him trying to separate them while they were hanging on him and etc etc with him.  His fince went all wtf with him, you go to San Diego and start playing around on me.

tag, i've got a shitload of stories to tell.

TAG

oh and I sprayed my brother with the old orignal mace once, thank god he never got me back for that.

One time me and my brother were in a department store, and we happened by some perfume samples. I picked one up and ended up dumping it all over him. While he was pissed off, he didn't want to leave, so we finished our shopping. All the while I kept calling him fag in an overly loud voice.


Well the joke was on me, that was the day I found out I was overly sensitive to certain scents. I ended up puking in the car on the way home. I guess you could say, I owned myself.

I shot my sister in the head with a .45clone pellet pistol, got beat good for that.

My brother and I used to stick dog chow in my sisters mouth when she was sleeping. Not to mention bugs.

once my brother and I were staying with the summer baby sitter.  My mom had asked us to tell her how to get to our house in the country.  She loaded us up and so the journey began.  We got her all the way out to the the house but told her to turn right instead of left and the journey continued.  She drove to the end of the oil well pad and asked now what?  We told her to drive across the mesquite infested field.  She then asked where the road was.  I told her we never drove in the same place twice so that we wouldn't kill the grass for the cows.  She believe it and ended up with flats and we had to change them and then she took us back the our mothers office.  When she finally got the right directions and when mom and dad got home we got an ass beating.

According to my brother, it was my ducking when he threw the teather ball at me.  He found out that tether balls go through plate glass windows.

For about 2 weeks (when I was a kid) I would go into my little sisters room when she was sleeping and put just a small drop of dish soap in her mouth. Not enough to make her sick, just enough that every morning she would wake up with the taste of soap in her mouth and no idea why.

Not me but saw my friend:  Dared is lil brother to pee on a rock.  Problem was the rock had wire from an electrified cattle fence wrapped around it.  The term knocked his dick in the dirt was born.

Kid went on his ass.  
20 years later-Still has not had any kids of his own and always has a weird look on his face.  

When I was 11-12 yrs old we lived on lakefront property. In the summer on especially nice days I'd get stuck watching my 5 & 7 yr old sisters as they splashed in the shallows. I'd give them a 1/2 hour or so and then yell "lookout,water snakes!" pointing at some broken off lily pad stems sticking up out of the water. With a little breeze they swayed in the water looking just like a snake swimming with its head sticking up. Of course we didn't have any snakes around other than garter snakes. They'd totally lose it,running for the house shrieking & screaming and I'd be free to go meet my buddies. Flash forward 30+ yrs. We'r discussing having a family get together at a local lake and one of them says..."there isn't water snakes there is there? Other one says,"yeah I still have nightmares about those things!" I'd completely forgot about it and they had to remind me about the "water snakes" at the lake house. I dam near died laughing and they were way POed! I'd scarred them for life.