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Posted: 3/4/2006 2:50:33 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/4/2006 3:07:17 PM EDT by PeteCO]
I am going to have to spend some time in Brisbane, AUS next month, and I have VERY pale and fair skin. I burn quite easily. Therefore, I decided to go to a local tanning place, which is something I have never done before. I just got back.

These are beds, and they are each in a little room with a chair. There is no full wall, just a partition wall.

When I was tanning, the woman in the booth next to me was quite obviously masturbating. It was, uh, interesting to listen to, but then the thought crossed my mind of some fat hairy bastard like myself having done the same as she in the same tanning bed I was in. We left at approximately the same time, and yes - she was quite hot.

Oh well, it was a nice distraction listening to her - I don't think she realized how loud she was being. No, I didn't tell my wife about it when I got back in the car......
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 2:57:01 PM EDT


She must of been REALLY loud.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 2:58:05 PM EDT
beats covering your junk with a sock i suppose
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:06:14 PM EDT

Originally Posted By krpind:


She must of been REALLY loud.



It was pretty quiet in there - some of their machines have fans and some don't. It was pretty deserted in there today so I could hear no just "vocal" noises, but some wet sking-type noises as well. She was really hammering away, from what I could tell.

I couldn't smell any of the funk, however.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:06:59 PM EDT
so were you tanning to get tan, or to prevent yourself from burning?

If the it's the latter, the efficacy of a 'base tan' is a myth.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:08:07 PM EDT
A new tanning lotion perhaps.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:08:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By bastiat:
so were you tanning to get tan, or to prevent yourself from burning?

If the it's the latter, the efficacy of a 'base tan' is a myth.



Eh, kind of both. My legs have seen maybe 30 seconds of sunlight my entire life, and I work long hours, indoors. I am a pale mf'er.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:09:39 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By bastiat:
so were you tanning to get tan, or to prevent yourself from burning?

If the it's the latter, the efficacy of a 'base tan' is a myth.



Eh, kind of both. My legs have seen maybe 30 seconds of sunlight my entire life, and I work long hours, indoors. I am a pale mf'er.



Well, I know your pain.

Thing is I can wear shorts all summer long and never get a tan on my legs. Spend several hours out playing golf and I'm as white as I was the day before.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:13:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By bastiat:

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By bastiat:
so were you tanning to get tan, or to prevent yourself from burning?

If the it's the latter, the efficacy of a 'base tan' is a myth.



Eh, kind of both. My legs have seen maybe 30 seconds of sunlight my entire life, and I work long hours, indoors. I am a pale mf'er.



Well, I know your pain.

Thing is I can wear shorts all summer long and never get a tan on my legs. Spend several hours out playing golf and I'm as white as I was the day before.



I get burnt like a lobster, but a week later I am pale white again.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:28:48 PM EDT
wet skiing sounds? did it sound like someone stirring a bowl of mac n cheese?
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:30:19 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/4/2006 3:30:38 PM EDT by sigarkar]

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By bastiat:
so were you tanning to get tan, or to prevent yourself from burning?

If the it's the latter, the efficacy of a 'base tan' is a myth.



Eh, kind of both. My legs have seen maybe 30 seconds of sunlight my entire life, and I work long hours, indoors. I am a pale mf'er.



dye your hair jet black.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:35:15 PM EDT
I would of said something just to see her reaction. Something to the effect of haveing fun in there?
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:37:44 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:39:15 PM EDT
You didn't "sympathy "sking"" along with her?
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:41:26 PM EDT

Originally Posted By christ0ph:
wet skiing sounds? did it sound like someone stirring a bowl of mac n cheese?



Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:47:15 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/4/2006 3:48:21 PM EDT by Andreuha]
Silly, you could have had some fun with it! If I saw her prior (so I'd at least know who I was remarking to), I'd have asked (half-jokingly?) if she was having fun - if not, I'd have listened and got up around the same time, and (in a small-talk'ish way) asked how the tan went... Yeah, I'm an ass...
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:51:57 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/4/2006 3:52:21 PM EDT by PinePig]
I can't believe you didn't put an erect penis on her cheek and snap a picture.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:54:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PinePig:
I can't believe you didn't put an erect penis on her cheek and snap a picture.



Only guys get that treatment
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:57:08 PM EDT
frost the tips of you hair so you can really fit in at the salon
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 3:59:02 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PinePig:
I can't believe you didn't put an erect penis on her cheek and snap a picture.



Just because I might have HAD an erect penis, doesn't mean I had to stick it on her cheek......

Link Posted: 3/4/2006 6:11:58 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By krpind:


She must of been REALLY loud.



It was pretty quiet in there - some of their machines have fans and some don't. It was pretty deserted in there today so I could hear no just "vocal" noises, but some wet sking-type noises as well. She was really hammering away, from what I could tell.

I couldn't smell any of the funk, however.



You should have done some kind of old southern gentleman thing, and kissed her hand.
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 6:27:18 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By PinePig:
I can't believe you didn't put an erect penis on her cheek and snap a picture.



Just because I might have HAD an erect penis, doesn't mean I had to stick it on her cheek......


Link Posted: 3/4/2006 6:29:47 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 6:33:08 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 7:19:20 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By krpind:


She must of been REALLY loud.



It was pretty quiet in there - some of their machines have fans and some don't. It was pretty deserted in there today so I could hear no just "vocal" noises, but some wet sking-type noises as well. She was really hammering away, from what I could tell.

I couldn't smell any of the funk, however.




Wet skiing-type noises??!@

WTF?? Was she masturbating with a pair of Rossignols?
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 7:48:23 PM EDT

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
I am going to have to spend some time in Brisbane, AUS next month, and I have VERY pale and fair skin. I burn quite easily. Therefore, I decided to go to a local tanning place, which is something I have never done before. I just got back.

These are beds, and they are each in a little room with a chair. There is no full wall, just a partition wall.

When I was tanning, the woman in the booth next to me was quite obviously masturbating. It was, uh, interesting to listen to, but then the thought crossed my mind of some fat hairy bastard like myself having done the same as she in the same tanning bed I was in. We left at approximately the same time, and yes - she was quite hot.

Oh well, it was a nice distraction listening to her - I don't think she realized how loud she was being. No, I didn't tell my wife about it when I got back in the car......



That is interesting.

My wife called me today from a business trip in Colorado. She said she had stopped in at some place to get into the tanning booth because she had a little time to kill. She says she is getting in the room to tan a fat hairy guy with real pale skin kept staring at her. She was a little disconcerted but figured it would be OK. now you must understand my wife is in her mid 30's, works out, and has a body that would stop a clock. When she wears tight clothing she gets looks from most men that see her.

Anyway, She was enjoying her time in the booth and kept hearing strange sounds from the booth next door with the fat hairy pale guy in it. he kept saying stuff like "yeah baby" and "OH YEAH" while she heard some wet sucking/slippery sounds in the background. She said she finally decided he was masturbating and went to get the manager. She decided to peek inside his room to make 100% sure so as not to embarass him. She said what she saw both shocked her and made her fall out laughing. There on the bed was this fat hairy pale guy with the smallest pee-pee she had ever seen. He was wearing it out with his hand and some tanning lotion. She laughed and laughed as she went back and changed clothes. She was leaving and noticed several more people in an adjacent room staring at her. About this time the fat hairy pale guy walks out, panics as everyone stares at him and he yells "IT WASN'T ME, IT WASN'T ME IT WAS HER!!!" and points at my wife.

He tells the manager as he is leaving the room, in a loud voice "I THINK SHE WAS MASTURBATING IN THERE, YOU MAY WANT TO CLEAN THAT ONE OUT!!!"

She couldn't help it, she laughed so hard she almost wet her pants. As the guy was walking out the door, he was saying "The guys on the (SOME GUN WEBSITE) aren't going to BELIEVE THIS!!!"


GR
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 7:52:25 PM EDT
Link Posted: 3/4/2006 7:54:36 PM EDT
I would have leaned close to her on my way out, with a shit eating grin of course ( mine is permanantly emblazoned on my face) and whispered : You know the walls here aren't quite as thick as you would think!
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