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Posted: 2/22/2006 7:16:14 AM EDT


1. If the enemy is in range, so are you.

2. Incoming fire has the right of way.

3. Don't look conspicuous: It draws fire.

4. The easy way is always mined.

5. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.

6. Professionals are predictable, its the amateurs that are dangerous.

7. The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions: When you are are ready for them and when you are not ready for them.

8. Team work is essential: it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.

9. If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you.

10. If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.

11. Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.

12. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

13. When the pin is pulled: Mr. Grenade is not your friend.

14. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.

15. When in doubt empty the magazine.

16. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you.

17. Next time your equipment malfunctions, remember it was made by the lowest bidder.

Thank a COMBAT VETERAN for the freedoms you enjoy today

Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:19:33 AM EDT
A lot of truth....
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 2:57:40 PM EDT
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:01:07 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 3:01:39 PM EDT by mtechgunman]

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



i really wish people would show some self control and not shit on other peoples threads whenever they feel need to make themselves feel important.

thanks for the thread........ i enjoyed it.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:05:03 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 3:06:16 PM EDT by MaddMan]
give him a break mtechgunman he is trying to get over three posts a day.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:11:25 PM EDT

Originally Posted By mtechgunman:

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



I really wish people would show some self control and not shit on other peoples threads whenever they feel need to make themselves feel important.

Thanks for the thread........ I enjoyed it.



True words.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:11:36 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.




Ease up guy - WTF?

+1 on enjoying the post.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:14:26 PM EDT

Originally Posted By mtechgunman:

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



i really wish people would show some self control and not shit on other peoples threads whenever they feel need to make themselves feel important.

thanks for the thread........ i enjoyed it.



+1..

Thanks for the crap in the thread Jacka-- er, JavaMan
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 3:19:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



I'll wager you don't get invited to very many parties, am I right?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:11:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Bubblehead597:

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



I'll wager you don't get invited to very many parties, am I right?



Probably never gets "re-invited".
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:14:37 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 5:17:21 PM EDT by PromptCritical]
Popularly known as "Murphy's Laws of Combat".

ETA:

5 second grenade fuses will burn down in 3.

Tracers work BOTH ways.

Equipment that needs to be together to function usually can't be shipped together.

Murphy was a Grunt.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:56:54 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 5:58:07 PM EDT by USMC_LB]
I post these for everyone except the "Thread Shitter" named JavaMan

Murphy's war laws

* Friendly fire - isn't.

* Recoilless rifles - aren't.

* Suppressive fires - won't.

* You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.

* A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

* If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

* Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.

* If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.

* If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.

* Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.

* Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.

* Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

* If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.

* The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.

* The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
when they're ready.
when you're not.

* No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.

* There is no such thing as a perfect plan.

* Five second fuses always burn three seconds.

* There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.

* A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
The Ol' Ranger's addendum:
Or else they're trying to suck you into a serious ambush!

* The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.

* The easy way is always mined.

* Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.

* Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.

* Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.

* If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.

* When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.

* Incoming fire has the right of way.

* No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

* No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.

* If the enemy is within range, so are you.

* The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

* Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.

* Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.

* Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.

* Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.)

* Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.

* Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.

* Tracers work both ways.

* If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.

* When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.

* Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.

* Military Intelligence is a contradiction.

* Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.

* Weather ain't neutral.

* If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed toward you.

LB
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:02:47 PM EDT
Einstein was right - the two most abundant elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. And not necessarily in that order.


Originally Posted By dalesimpson:

Originally Posted By Bubblehead597:
I'll wager you don't get invited to very many parties, am I right?



Probably never gets "re-invited".



Have you ever gone to a party where people are spewing nothing but old worn out crap and stupid hoaxes? Yeah, I wouldn't go back to that party, either. I'd figure those people are totall clueless lamers and have nothing interesting to say. But there are a few interesting people on ARFcom who actually type out their own thoughts rather than just Cut&Paste over-forwarded stupid crap that shows up in their inbox, so I think I'll hang around for a while. In the meantime, why don't you guys work on your self-control....
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:51:12 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:58:38 PM EDT
I can personally vouch for "Friendly Artillery isn't". Let's just say, incoming 155mm projo's have a way of changing the pucker factor.
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 4:54:54 AM EDT
Java, if you don't like my "old worn out crap and stupid hoaxes" don't read my thread.
you keep coming back so it must not be too lame.

Fox Uniform buddy...
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 9:03:17 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:23:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Rifleman1st:
Java, if you don't like my "old worn out crap and stupid hoaxes" don't read my thread.
you keep coming back so it must not be too lame.

Fox Uniform buddy...




I do it because I keep hoping one day you'll finally get a clue. Sadly, I believe I may be wrong about that.
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:26:24 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JavaMan:
I really wish people would show some self control and not repost every worn out piece of crap that pops up in their inbox.



Settle down Newbie.
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:29:45 PM EDT
Hey, is this the thread where we just drop by and poop in the corner? if not could you guys point me that direction

­




Keep posting, these are always good.
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:32:37 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JavaMan:

Originally Posted By Rifleman1st:
Java, if you don't like my "old worn out crap and stupid hoaxes" don't read my thread.
you keep coming back so it must not be too lame.

Fox Uniform buddy...




I do it because I keep hoping one day you'll finally get a clue. Sadly, I believe I may be wrong about that.


Hey why don't you get the fuck out of an otherwise good thread? Is it really that big a deal if you've heard this stuff before? If you don't like it...MOVE ON!!! Don't continue to post when you have obviously displayed what an ass you can make of yourself!!!!
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:33:43 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:42:37 PM EDT
USMC Rules For Gunfighting

1. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your
friends who have guns.
2. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life
is expensive.

3. Only hits count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.

4. If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast
enough nor using cover correctly.

5. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and
diagonal movement are preferred.)

6. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a
friend with a long gun.

7. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or
tactics. They will only remember who lived.

8. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and
running.

9. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more
dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun.

9.5 Use a gun that works EVERY TIME. "All skill is in vain when an Angel
pisses in the flintlock of your musket."

10. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have
to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. Have a plan.

13. Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.

14. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.

15. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.

16. Don't drop your guard.

17. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees.

18. Watch their hands. Hands kill. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep
your hands where I can see them).

19. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.

20. The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.
21. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you
meet.

22. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.

23. Your number one Option for Personal Security is a lifelong
commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.

24. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does
not start with a "4."

And the Navy Rules to Gunfighting:
1. Go to Sea
2. Bring Marines
3. Drink Coffee
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:45:46 PM EDT
A D.I.'s Rules For Dating His Daughter

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
Link Posted: 2/23/2006 12:48:05 PM EDT
Java you are a POS troll go play in the out in the road.



Originally Posted By JavaMan:
Einstein was right - the two most abundant elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. And not necessarily in that order.


Originally Posted By dalesimpson:

Originally Posted By Bubblehead597:
I'll wager you don't get invited to very many parties, am I right?



Probably never gets "re-invited".



Have you ever gone to a party where people are spewing nothing but old worn out crap and stupid hoaxes? Yeah, I wouldn't go back to that party, either. I'd figure those people are totall clueless lamers and have nothing interesting to say. But there are a few interesting people on ARFcom who actually type out their own thoughts rather than just Cut&Paste over-forwarded stupid crap that shows up in their inbox, so I think I'll hang around for a while. In the meantime, why don't you guys work on your self-control....

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