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Posted: 2/19/2006 5:53:08 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/19/2006 5:53:27 PM EDT by Specop_007]
Sonofabitch. My wifes friend is a peice of shit. Motherfucker leeches off everyone, nothing is his fault, world owes him yadda yadda yadda. For those following the going-ons, you'll know this wonderful stand up citizen to be the adopted son of my wifes girlfriend who is having (still) an affair on her husband. Irrelevent for this story. Anyways, ever since our said cum guzzling stank ass broke up with his boyfriend hes bounced around between places to live cause he torn ass self cant seem to find and hold a decent job.
And guess what? The ex b/f (Who is also one of my wifes friends) came over to visit with said lowlife tonight. I KNEW he was gonna ask if he could stay the night. Fuckin knew this shit. I told the wife no. HELL FUCKING NO he aint stayin here tonight. I'm not a goddamned halfway house for every gay peice of cock sucker that decides to be a leech ass piece of shit.
Whatever.
So i leave for work and the 2 guys and my wife are still there.

And guess what? I get a call..."Do you care if sonso stays here tonight? Its just one night"
YES. YES I FUCKING CARE. QUITE A GODDAMNED LOT IN FACT. Didnt I make it clear before i left when I clearly said "HES NOT FUCKING STAYING HERE'? Did you interpret this to me Yes hun, its ok if he stays here? The wife hems and haws but but but he can watch the kids in the morning still the baby sitter gets here, its just one night, he has no place to go...

THIS SHIT IS NOT MY FUCKING PROBLEM! I dont care if hes your friend, hes still a worthless shitbag ass fuckin cum guzzlin lazy fuck who needs a real goddamned job so he doesnt have to leech off everyone!!

Damnit, I KNEW this shit was gonna happen. Soon as I leave the house the wife gets all fuckin wishy washy and its all over. Sonofabitch.

Rant fucking over.

Link Posted: 2/19/2006 5:55:17 PM EDT
Too much to say, must be quiet now.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 5:57:13 PM EDT
Throw her out too for not listening..lol
Beside immediate family there are no other men up in my crib when i aint there.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 6:01:16 PM EDT
Need to work on that Pimp Hand........
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 6:04:10 PM EDT
So two gay male friends of your wife's are staying over at your house tonight ? Do you and the wife flip a coin to see who has to change the sheets in the guest bedroom the next day ? Kinda hard to follow but it sounds like a hell of a situation. If you don't want them in the house the wife should respect that just as you should if she doesn't want any of your friends staying over. Good luck
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 6:05:03 PM EDT
While trying to scan your post, I get

-sonofabitch-
-leeches-
-hell fucking no-
...

-this shit is not my fucking problem-

Take note guys. This is the agressive way to rant!
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 6:05:23 PM EDT
Ummm I think its great that ya trust your wife enough to leave her alone with a lowlife but ummm Im thinking she maybe needs some new friends maybe
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 6:06:37 PM EDT
Call the cops?

Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:36:20 PM EDT

Originally Posted By LANCEMAN:
So two gay male friends of your wife's are staying over at your house tonight ? Do you and the wife flip a coin to see who has to change the sheets in the guest bedroom the next day ? Kinda hard to follow but it sounds like a hell of a situation. If you don't want them in the house the wife should respect that just as you should if she doesn't want any of your friends staying over. Good luck



No, gay #1 brought gay #2 to our place to drop him off to stay with us. Gay #1 then went home.
Yeah, I'm a halfway house tonight. Hoo fuckin ray for my generosity.

Both guys in question are good friends with the wife so.......Kinda an uphill battle. And we ALL know whats on the line in a disagreement with the Other Half.
Pie.



Its a no win situation. I either have Torn Ass staying the night or I get no Pie.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:36:51 PM EDT

Originally Posted By CSM:
While trying to scan your post, I get

-sonofabitch-
-leeches-
-hell fucking no-
...

-this shit is not my fucking problem-

Take note guys. This is the agressive way to rant!




I was mad as hell, what can I say.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:39:51 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/19/2006 8:40:08 PM EDT by VTwin60]

Originally Posted By Specop_007:
Its a no win situation. I either have Torn Ass staying the night or I get no Pie.



hey I'm just glad you said it and not me......but you may want to consider sleeping on your back....

Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:49:28 PM EDT
tag for outcome!
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:52:05 PM EDT
Do what I do with people like that I don't like. In short, make them sure you are completely NUTS!

My routine, (and I have had people tell me I remind them alot of Pvt. Pyle in the latrine after this routine)

Talk about crazy off the wall shit, like how you like killing animals, promoting the death penalty, or something suitably nuts. Give it a day, then show them some flash videos like, Mr. Happy Face, or Milkman. Laugh hysterically at both of those (it may take practice) and in the end, talk about guns and how much you love them...

Oh, forgot a very important part, get a good stare down. You know the stare, the semi blank, "I am trying to burn you with my mind!" stare. Use "The Stare" on them, soon they will ask what you are thinking about. Give a good answer, "nothing, heh heh..." or "pain, and happiness", or if the situation is extreme and you are alone, "brains, splattered all over the wall!"



Mods, this is a joke, in satire, not intended to violate the COC.

Link Posted: 2/19/2006 8:53:36 PM EDT
You've let him take up residence, now you have to have him evicted if you want him to leave. NEVER LET ANYBODY STAY IN YOUR HOME!
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:02:22 PM EDT
right now he is eating your food and watching your tv


tommorow night I would give 50/50 odds it will be more of the same
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:05:35 PM EDT
You should learn how to put your foot down in these situations!
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:10:10 PM EDT
Bring home a couple of hookers for yourself and call it even.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:10:43 PM EDT
Sounds like it's time to trade in wifey on a 2006
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:11:46 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/19/2006 9:12:13 PM EDT by distributor_of_pain]
WTF is your problem man!?
Haven't you seen Jerry Springer?
You're fucking asking for it aren't you!?

Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:14:39 PM EDT
this thread is going to be from a rant thread to a draw down thread in the next few hours. Just you watch.
Link Posted: 2/19/2006 9:23:45 PM EDT
Tagged to see what happens when you come home to find to guy sleeping on the couch.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 5:48:11 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Sub-MOA:
Sounds like it's time to trade in wifey on a 2006



Yep- those older models- high mileage, high maintenance, boxy shape (esp/ in the rear), frame sag, hard to get 'em to turn over on a cold morning- sounds like a good idea to me!...
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:35:34 AM EDT
Dude seriously...Why is your wife associating with a bunch of butt pirates? I would be straight up with that faggot mofo and tell him I didnt like him and dont appreciate him mooching off me and causing problems between me and my wife! good luck man...and you got to explain to your wife why this shit aint cool
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:39:16 AM EDT

Originally Posted By TheAmaazingCarl:
right now he is eating your food and watching your tv


tommorow night I would give 50/50 odds it will be more of the same



+1
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:42:15 AM EDT
So your wife is letting some guy with known issues watch your kids?

She totally disrespected your positon on staying in your home?

That is some seriously fucked up shit. I hope you did an inventory of your home.

Unfucking believable.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:47:29 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Hellhound:
Need to work on that Pimp Hand........



+87


You will end up on the ARFCOM divorce list.


Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:49:34 AM EDT
I thought you were a cop?

OC that fuckstick and be done with it. Man, ya'll need to learn to yell more or something. Work with your wife, but make her work with you.

In essence, be a man and tell her NO and mean it.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 6:54:18 AM EDT
MFMM

that'll make an interesting video, not exactly my thing, but I'd recommend you go heavy on the tequila.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 7:12:48 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 7:47:48 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/21/2006 7:48:05 AM EDT by TheOtherDave]
If he's still there when you get home, it's time for an upgrade on Wife 1.0.

OTOH, it might be a great time to hit her up on that night vision you wanted.....
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 8:03:41 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Bama-Shooter:
So your wife is letting some guy with known issues watch your kids?

She totally disrespected your positon on staying in your home?

That is some seriously fucked up shit. I hope you did an inventory of your home.

Unfucking believable.



What he said. Either your wife needs news friends or you need a new wife.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 8:07:13 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/21/2006 8:08:07 AM EDT by Hokie]
If I were you, I'd shop around the EE for a set of duracoated pre-ban testicles with a low round count.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 8:15:08 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 8:17:18 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/21/2006 8:18:01 AM EDT by Hokie]

Originally Posted By Stokes:
Obviously, you're having problems controlling your wife, while some turd burgler isn't.

The first thing you need to do is quit communicating your wish with the turd burgler through your wife. Do it direct, do it yourself. Let him know personally that he's not staying.

Now, go and let you wife know who is the head of household. If there is a power struggle between you two, you better win and you better win quick.

Don't let a turd burglar vaginize you by proxy.



+1
that turd burglar is metaphorically sticking it up your ass
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 8:21:50 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 1:31:26 PM EDT
What would your wife say if you had a couple of lesbians sleeping over who were friends of your sisters husband?
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 1:39:36 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/21/2006 1:40:02 PM EDT by red65]
Tonight when you are sleeping, if you start having a dream that you are sucking on a popsicle or eating a banana, WAKE UP QUICK!!

Your new friend might be "checking your tonsils" if you get my drift.
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 1:51:13 PM EDT
Have a lipstick lesbian drop off her lipstick lesbian partner to stay the night and see what the wife says then.

Randall
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 7:06:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Hellhound:
Need to work on that Pimp Hand........



+1
Link Posted: 2/21/2006 7:07:34 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:29:47 AM EDT
Well, I was expecting to hear something by now....

The Turd Burglar must've beat Specop_007 till he pissed like a puppy..
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:51:20 AM EDT
Forgo the damn pie and kick his worthless oxygen theif, Rump Ranger ass out on the street.


Do it now or you know damn well he'll be back - with friends.

I'm serious.

CMOS
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:54:56 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Bama-Shooter:
So your wife is letting some guy with known issues watch your kids?

She totally disrespected your positon on staying in your home?

That is some seriously fucked up shit. I hope you did an inventory of your home.

Unfucking believable.



This would be the red flag, more than the other issues you mentioned.......
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:55:57 AM EDT
Turn in your "man card".
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:56:55 AM EDT
Errrrr "Team Clubhouse" is that way bro -------------------------->

Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:57:18 AM EDT
Gross!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:03:01 AM EDT
Diversity's Grrrrrrrrrrrreat!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:06:18 AM EDT
It definitely sounds like a pimp slap is in order. WTF is you wife doing hanging out with people like this in the first place?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 5:10:08 AM EDT
Well crap man. Sorry for your predicment. If it turns out that the wife agrees to give you a bj,just make sure to keep a light on.
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