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Posted: 2/9/2006 5:47:42 AM EDT
Mine didn't roll in dead treerat, it just jumped on the bed, stood 6 inches from the back of my head, and let out a dog fart
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 5:51:17 AM EDT
1. What the hell is your dog doing ON THE BED?

2. Was he smiling when he farted?

3. Do you have a picture?

4. Are you sure your wife didn't train him to do that?

5. That shits funny right there

roy d...my dog still living....but stays off the furniture
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 5:52:22 AM EDT
BOOM!
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:42:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By RoyDamnMercer:
1. What the hell is your dog doing ON THE BED?

2. Was he smiling when he farted?

3. Do you have a picture?

4. Are you sure your wife didn't train him to do that?

5. That shits funny right there

roy d...my dog still living....but stays off the furniture

It lives there

Probably

No

Hell no I fired that bitch

No, no it's not
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:47:03 AM EDT
Now that is a dog with personality!!! What breed is it?
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:52:19 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/9/2006 6:53:06 AM EDT by Dusty_C]

Originally Posted By JeromeAvers:
Now that is a dog with personality!!! What breed is it?

Brussels Griffon. I have 2 of the hyper bastards


ETA, actually one is my parents, and the other is a rescue. So she stays.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:53:13 AM EDT
dog fart is a punting offense
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:55:17 AM EDT
Well it depends. Is this the first time its happened or is the dog a repeat offender? Has the dog chewed up anything expensive lately? Does the dog have a purpose?(is he a working dog that earns his keep or a dog thats there for your enjoyment only) I would probably just kick him in the balls really hard and pepper spray him.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:57:03 AM EDT
BANG!!!
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 6:59:08 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BullDogger:
Well it depends. Is this the first time its happened or is the dog a repeat offender? Has the dog chewed up anything expensive lately? Does the dog have a purpose?(is he a working dog that earns his keep or a dog thats there for your enjoyment only) I would probably just kick him in the balls really hard and pepper spray him.

No purpose to me but my parents paid 500 dollars for the little rat bastard. He's a farter, that's for sure but this is the first time he got in my ear to do it.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:02:52 AM EDT
I'd fight fire with fire. Next time you have rip one, grab the dog and shove it up your ass and let'r rip.

Give that sod poodle a dutch oven.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:03:54 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Hokie:
I'd fight fire with fire. Next time you have rip one, grab the dog and shove it up your ass and let'r rip.

Give that sod poodle a dutch oven.

How bout I shove the dog up YOUR ass, lol. Nothing, especially dog, most especially a male dog is going near my ass.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:04:53 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Dusty_C:

Originally Posted By Hokie:
I'd fight fire with fire. Next time you have rip one, grab the dog and shove it up your ass and let'r rip.

Give that sod poodle a dutch oven.

How bout I shove the dog up YOUR ass, lol. Nothing, especially dog, most especially a male dog is going near my ass.



lol...I like you man, I really do, but you can't shove your dog up my ass!


lol
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:06:24 AM EDT
You are the one feeding him right? Change his diet so 1. He doesn't fart or 2. His farts smell good.

The way his farts smell is a direct result of what you feed him. Spend a few more dollars on good food and maybe his farts will smell good.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:10:32 AM EDT
I thought about Roy's thread this morning. I looked outside about an hour ago to see my two dogs having a tug of war with a deer hide. By now, they both smell like sweet sweet deer death. It's a good sized hide too, I guess my neighbor down the ridge didn't bury his deer guts deep enough. There are some farm dogs that come and visit my dogs, and I'm sure they brought the hide over.

I love my dogs to death, but there is nothing fun about bathing a 120 lb. German Shepherd that doesn't want a bath. The little 45 lb pit is even harder to bathe somehow. Having had two back surgeries doesn't make it easy either. My pregnant wife sure isn't going to give them a bath. I wonder if my neighbor would be up for it. Chances are he'd be an advocate of a lead bath.

I was going to shoot my pit a few months ago. I love that dog, I found her under a car in a parking lot in the Virgin Islands when she was three weeks old. She was covered with fleas and mange, and full of worms, and she wouldn't even drink water. I had to feed her milk water with a syringe for two weeks before she started acting right, and the medications had to kick in. I raised her very carefully, and she is a wonderful dog. Very loving and gentle, except to other animals that challenge her, then she is the meanest thing I have ever seen in my life. They breed dogs for fighting in the islands, and I didn't know all that before I got attached to her. I didn't even know she was a pitbull when I found her.

Two months ago, my wife had my pit with her when she stayed to sleep after a night shift at her doctor friends farm. She told her friend not to let our dog out. The doc let her out anyway to play in the yard. Doc has a goat that is the alpha animal on the farm, it even bosses her dogs around. Well, that goat decided to assert itself on my pit, and long story short, my wife was doing emergency surgery on the goat to keep its airway open a little later on the way to the vet. The goat was destroyed by my dog. This is illegal in WV. I have to put the dog down by law because of my wife's friends stupidity. If I don't, and someone calls the sheriff, he will come out and shoot the dog, and send me a bill for the bullet. Destruction of livestock means that my dog is now classified as vicious.

So, with tears in my eyes I told my wife I was going to shoot my dog. It absolutely broke my heart. My wife flipped out(she's a city girl from New Jersey), and went ape shit. Needless to say after she called me an animal and immoral and so on, she decided we are not going to put the dog down. So, now I am looking outside at this dog that I was going to put down that is rolling around(as we speak) on an old rotting deer hide, and wondering what my wife would say if I told her that our dog just disappeared today.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:39:42 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BigAKFan:
You are the one feeding him right? Change his diet so 1. He doesn't fart or 2. His farts smell good.

The way his farts smell is a direct result of what you feed him. Spend a few more dollars on good food and maybe his farts will smell good.

I don't feed them walmart shit. They get royal canin. I know how to treat my dogs but they still stink, no matter what you feed them.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 7:46:20 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 2IDdoc:
I thought about Roy's thread this morning. I looked outside about an hour ago to see my two dogs having a tug of war with a deer hide. By now, they both smell like sweet sweet deer death. It's a good sized hide too, I guess my neighbor down the ridge didn't bury his deer guts deep enough. There are some farm dogs that come and visit my dogs, and I'm sure they brought the hide over.

I love my dogs to death, but there is nothing fun about bathing a 120 lb. German Shepherd that doesn't want a bath. The little 45 lb pit is even harder to bathe somehow. Having had two back surgeries doesn't make it easy either. My pregnant wife sure isn't going to give them a bath. I wonder if my neighbor would be up for it. Chances are he'd be an advocate of a lead bath.

I was going to shoot my pit a few months ago. I love that dog, I found her under a car in a parking lot in the Virgin Islands when she was three weeks old. She was covered with fleas and mange, and full of worms, and she wouldn't even drink water. I had to feed her milk water with a syringe for two weeks before she started acting right, and the medications had to kick in. I raised her very carefully, and she is a wonderful dog. Very loving and gentle, except to other animals that challenge her, then she is the meanest thing I have ever seen in my life. They breed dogs for fighting in the islands, and I didn't know all that before I got attached to her. I didn't even know she was a pitbull when I found her.

Two months ago, my wife had my pit with her when she stayed to sleep after a night shift at her doctor friends farm. She told her friend not to let our dog out. The doc let her out anyway to play in the yard. Doc has a goat that is the alpha animal on the farm, it even bosses her dogs around. Well, that goat decided to assert itself on my pit, and long story short, my wife was doing emergency surgery on the goat to keep its airway open a little later on the way to the vet. The goat was destroyed by my dog. This is illegal in WV. I have to put the dog down by law because of my wife's friends stupidity. If I don't, and someone calls the sheriff, he will come out and shoot the dog, and send me a bill for the bullet. Destruction of livestock means that my dog is now classified as vicious.

So, with tears in my eyes I told my wife I was going to shoot my dog. It absolutely broke my heart. My wife flipped out(she's a city girl from New Jersey), and went ape shit. Needless to say after she called me an animal and immoral and so on, she decided we are not going to put the dog down. So, now I am looking outside at this dog that I was going to put down that is rolling around(as we speak) on an old rotting deer hide, and wondering what my wife would say if I told her that our dog just disappeared today.



I say live and let live.

in court you could argue willfull negligence on the part of the friend?

the dog was only doing what comes natural to EVERY canine.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 2:49:14 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Hokie:
I'd fight fire with fire. Next time you have rip one, grab the dog and shove it up your ass and let'r rip.

Give that sod poodle a dutch oven.



Problem with that is, dogs love the smell of people's asses so he's probably going to be sniffing you all the time in the hopes that you'll do another one for him.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 4:06:07 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Hokie:
I'd fight fire with fire. Next time you have rip one, grab the dog and shove it up your ass and let'r rip.

Give that sod poodle a dutch oven.




he does that he liable to wake up tomarrow morning with a dog dick humping his ear instead of a fart.
Link Posted: 2/9/2006 5:03:19 PM EDT
and while you at it kill my stinky-ass dog too!
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