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Posted: 1/4/2006 7:29:00 AM EDT
Do you fellas know Bill Brasky?
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:29:15 AM EDT
No.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:29:20 AM EDT
Not a clue.........
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:29:53 AM EDT
He's a big fella, goes about 6'4", 280. He loves his Scotch!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:30:24 AM EDT
No but I'll take your word for it
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:30:55 AM EDT
Bill Brasky??? From Brasky's Plumbing?
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:31:46 AM EDT
He's a hell of a salesman!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:32:56 AM EDT
Bill Brasky
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Bill Brasky was the central figure of several sketches on the television sketch comedy program Saturday Night Live between 1996 and 1998. The format of these sketches was as follows: Three or four men get loudly drunk in a bar, hotel restaurant, Little League game, or other semi-public place and reminisce about Bill Brasky's superhuman accomplishments, usually focused on his virility, celebrity connections, and his reckless disregard for human life. Typically, the three cycle through the same genres of comment four or five times: one man will recount a tall tale about Brasky, the second will expound on the benefits of expense accounts, the third will hit on a waitress, the first will drunkenly blurt out something embarrassing, and then the cycle will repeat starting with the second salesman, getting more outrageous each time around. After a few minutes of this Bill Brasky himself will appear, via a forced perspective shot and either demand or offer everyone scotch, ending the skit.

Bill Brasky's full name is William Robert Brasky. He has a wife and a young daughter named Debbie. Cast member Will Ferrell and writer Adam McKay wrote these sketches.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:33:11 AM EDT
Bill Brasky, he used to buy my kids gifts every Christmas, here's to Bill Brasky.. Cheers!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:33:21 AM EDT
Well, anyway.. he shows up at the church in his golf pants, caked in mud. Well, ol' Bill Brasky pushes the priest aside and says, "I'll baptize that piece of calamari!" Then he pours Scotch all over my baby son and says, "There! You're baptized!"
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:33:50 AM EDT
To Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 7:34:17 AM EDT
To Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:04:34 AM EDT
Bill Brasky had sex with my Wife and ruined her for all mortal Men, to Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:10:38 AM EDT
The character of Johnny Appleseed was based on Brasky except for the part about planting apple trees and not raping men.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:13:34 AM EDT
Bill Braskey is a son of a bitch!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:15:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Yankee1911:
The character of Johnny Appleseed was based on Brasky except for the part about planting apple trees and not raping men.





Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:17:46 AM EDT

Originally Posted By JackieTreehorn:
Well, anyway.. he shows up at the church in his golf pants, caked in mud. Well, ol' Bill Brasky pushes the priest aside and says, "I'll baptize that piece of calamari!" Then he pours Scotch all over my baby son and says, "There! You're baptized!"


That ain't mud.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:21:57 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:25:10 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:27:12 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:41:56 AM EDT
One day me and Bill were drinking in a parking lot, and we drank for so long they built a bar around us. When we decided to leave, Bill lit a match and burned the place to the ground and said " I like to leave things the way I found em"
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:50:03 AM EDT
Bill Brasky stole my wife and turned me gay. He's a helluva guy!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:54:39 AM EDT

Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky sold me into slavery?

I woke up on a boat to Thailand, and while I was there Bill sired three beautiful children with my wife.

To Bill Brasky!

Link Posted: 1/4/2006 8:56:33 AM EDT
One time Bill Brasky and Chuck Norris were out drinking. They got into an arguement over whose dick was bigger. A fist fight broke out. The result? The big bang. Thats where the universe came from. It's still taught in most southern schools systems.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:00:41 AM EDT
Well, I'm in Corpus Christi on business a month ago, and I had this eight-foot tall Asian waiter.. which made me a little curious, so I asked him his name, and sure enough it's Ho Tran Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:02:58 AM EDT
Yeah, I know Bill Brasky. He's a 10 foot-tall beast-man, who showers in vodka, and feeds his baby shrimp scampi.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:18:45 AM EDT
Middle-Aged-Man's "Drinkin' Buddy"?
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:24:13 AM EDT
Wow, I feel like I missed something important,.......I just can't figure out what!!!

When we were teenagers there was a little fag named 'Willie' Brasky who ran around trying to suck our dicks,coincidence?? I think NOT!!!......
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:28:50 AM EDT
We once had a bachelor party for Bill Brasky. He ate the entire cake, before we could tell him there was a stripper in it.

Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:30:49 AM EDT
Brasky's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:32:25 AM EDT
Brasky is ranked 8th in the AP College Football poll.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:32:58 AM EDT
To Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:38:34 AM EDT
My name's Turk... and I know BILL BRASKY!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:45:03 AM EDT
Bill Brasky? Yeah, I know Bill Brasky.

Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky went hunting? Brasky decides he's going to hunt down all four of the Banana Splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machette. They all begged for their lives...except Fleagle.

Brasky drank a full glass of liquid LSD with his eggs. Then he slept for 8 months straight. When he woke he rubbed his eyes and said, "All in all, I prefer gin."

He taught me how to make love to a woman, and how to scold a child. To Bill Brasky!!!!!

-Jason M
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:54:05 AM EDT
Bill Brasky is the toughest man that I ever met. I saw Bill Brasky take Paul Bunyon's axe from him and then bitch slap ole Paul. After knocking Paul out, Brasky used the axe to kill Bunyon's oxe and make steaks out of him. It wasn't long before Brasky was cooking Blue on the grill and using Bunyon's wife as a concubine.

Here's to Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 9:58:13 AM EDT
Yeah I know who you're talking about. That dude John Goodman was talking about.

To Bill Brasky!

I thought for a sec your title said Brady.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 10:25:31 AM EDT
One day while I was at the range, shooting my Barrett .50 cal. @ 1200 meters. Brasky kicked me in the ass while I was in the prone position. And told me, “That’s not the way to shot that thing!” with gun in one hand and a 5th of Scotch in the other. He took his shot one handed standing, while downing his Scotch (he loves his Scotch). Standing in amazement sure enough the incendiary round hit the target. Then he said, “That’s how you do it pussy!” and slapped me breaking my jaw. YEAH it was wired shut for two months.

To Bill Brasky! A ten-foot-tall, two-ton son of a bitch who could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 10:32:18 AM EDT
One time I was with Brasky in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Brasky goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Bill Brasky! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'Billbrasky' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!

To Bill Brasky!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 10:44:55 AM EDT
yeah i know Bill Brasky....

Bill Brasky had a four day heart attack...a day for each chamber. At the autopsy, they said his heart looked like a basketball filled with riccotta cheese

I once saw him scissor kick Angela Landsbury.

He gave a handjob to a manta ray.

TO BILL BRASKY
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 10:52:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Bunn19:
One day me and Bill were drinking in a parking lot, and we drank for so long they built a bar around us. When we decided to leave, Bill lit a match and burned the place to the ground and said " I like to leave things the way I found em"




you beat me to it... my favorite!!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 10:56:13 AM EDT
jackie treehorn treats objects like women, man.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 11:22:05 AM EDT
People forget the brain is the biggest sex organ.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:04:50 PM EDT
On you maybe.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:12:45 PM EDT
Hmmm.

Brasky or Norris?
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:21:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By zer04evr:
Hmmm.

Brasky or Norris?



If they had children together.... Imagine the madness. We'd all be dead.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:24:55 PM EDT

Originally Posted By zer04evr:
Hmmm.

Brasky or Norris?



you have no choice


they'll both take your virginity
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:27:35 PM EDT
Are you guys talking about Bill Brasky! I KNOW HIM!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:31:15 PM EDT
He drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

BILL BRASKY!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:36:59 PM EDT
Brasky would put on a white tie and tails and would walk his cobra through the park on a leash. He named the cobra Beverly, and he taught it how to fetch and dial a phone. But then one day it bit the maid. So with tears in his eyes Brasky had to shoot the maid.
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:43:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/4/2006 12:44:18 PM EDT by UberPhLuBB]
One time I asked Brasky to dress up like Santa for a Christmas party I was throwing for my children. Well Brasky shows up as Santa, reaches into his bag and says "I've got goodies for you kids." He proceeds to hand out scrap metal and cigarettes to them. Then he takes off his beard and says "There is no Santa 'cause I ate him."

You know, it's said that the story of Indiana Jones is loosley base off of Bill Brasky's life!

Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky rode me in the Kentucky Derby? Hell, I was running full-bore right alongside some of the finest stallions in the business. That's when I blew out my knee. After the race they were taking me out back to be shot, thank God Brasky was there to tell them I wasn't a horse!

To Bill Brasky!

Game's called on account of scotch!
Link Posted: 1/4/2006 12:50:15 PM EDT
To BILL BRASKY!
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