For some reason, I feel like I need to chime in on this one.

My wife and I had a 2 hour conversation about this the other night.  We are both very ambitious in our careers and neither of us can imagine being a stay at home mom/dad.  We have decided that we both believe that children are a blessing in two ways...with and without.  Some people just aren't meant to have children, and I don't mean that in a bad way.  If you think that children are for you, go for it and congrats.  If not, then go for it and congrats.

just my .02

Brian

Amen, brother.  My wife and I have been married for 8 years, and we aren't having any of the little crumbsnatchers.  Matter o' fact, I'm getting fixed in a month or so just to make sure.  

People with children remind me of drug addicts...they look miserable, but they can't wait to tell you how great it is.

Quoted: Quoted: It seems like ever since my wife and I have gotten married, everyone if pressuring us to have kids. I don't want any and she doesn't want any either. I'll admit it. I'm a bit greedy and don't want to spend my hard earned money on a kid. No offence but it's a good thing for you & her that your parents didn't feel like that.

Their parents were adults capable of making their own decisions (or mistakes) too.

I'm 25 and I am very much like you. I never wanted kids. Being greedy is part of it. Not wanting to bring anyone else in this world since its not a very nice place was a big part of it too.


My son is four months old and I am more in love with his mom than ever before. Theres just something about seeing your child smile at you.

I can't blame you for not wanting children. But, if it happens, its not the worst thing in the world.

Quoted: It seems like ever since my wife and I have gotten married, everyone if pressuring us to have kids. I don't want any and she doesn't want any either. I'll admit it. I'm a bit greedy and don't want to spend my hard earned money on a kid. I'd prefer to spend it on myself or my wife and get the toys we want. We don't want the burden of having a child to deal with. Anytime we want to go out, we can go. I don't want to give up that freedom. Plus, the world is over populated as it is. We don't need anymore people. The world is F'ed up enough and I don't want to raise a child into that. Plus what says we have to have a child? NOTHING! You can say that our views will change, but I don't see that happening. I'm 26 and my wife is 24. She feels as strongly about it as I do. Plus it's better to not have them and wish I did than to have them and wish I didn't. OK.  I feel better now. Thanks for listening. Kris

If you don't want kids, don't have kids.  Why should anyone jump his case for saying he is sick of people asking when he is going to have children?  They do not come with instructions or garantees.  What pisses me off are the idiots that have kids, never have anything to do with them, and then later on in life have some more, then say, I can be a better parent now
Truth is, they still suck at being a parent.  If the kid turned out great, they take the credit, if the kid turned out to be an ass, they blame the person who had to raise them alone.

I don't believe in abortion, but it takes severe commitment to raise children, it is not some "dream" thing, they are hellions at times.  The best thing you can do for a child is make sure the person you are having/raising them with is ready to lay down their life for them, period, without the immature mindset that "MY Child Will Never", because you just don't know.  When things don't go right, there are always people there to kick you where you are hurting when it comes to your kids.

HOW TO KNOW WHETHER YOU'RE READY FOR PARENTHOOD

MESS TEST Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains.  Rub
your hands in the wet flower bed and rub on the walls.
Cover the stains with crayons.  Place a fish stick behind
the couch and leave it there all summer.

TOY TEST Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos.  (If Legos are not
available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken
bottles.)  Have a friend spread them all over the house.
Put on a blindfold.  Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen.
Do not scream (this could wake a child at night).

GROCERY STORE TEST Borrow one or two small animals (goats or
monkeys are best) and take them with you as you shop at the
grocery store.  Always keep them in sight and pay for
anything they eat or damage.

DRESSING TEST Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus.
Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay
inside.

FEEDING TEST Obtain a large plastic milk jug.  Fill halfway
with water.  Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord.
Start the jug swinging.  Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy
cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of
the jug while pretending to be an airplane.  Now dump the
contents of the jug on the floor.

NIGHT TEST Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill
it with 8 to 12 pounds of sand.  Soak it thoroughly in
water.  At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until
9:00 PM.  Lay down your bag and set  your alarm for 10:00
PM.  Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have
ever heard.  Make up about a dozen more and sing these too
until 4:00 AM.  Set alarm for 5:00 AM.  Get up and make
breakfast.  Keep this up for 5 years.  Look cheerful.

PHYSICAL TEST (WOMEN) Obtain a large bean-bag chair and
attach it to the front of your clothes.  Leave it there for
9 months.  Then remove only 10% of the beans.

PHYSICAL TEST (MEN) Go to the nearest drug store.  Set your
wallet on the counter.  Ask the clerk to help himself.  Now
proceed to the nearest food store.  Go to the head office
and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to
the store.  Purchase a newspaper.  Go home and read it
quietly for the last time.

FINAL ASSIGNMENT Find a couple who already have a small
child.  Lecture them on how they can improve their
discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and
child's table manners.  Suggest many ways they can improve.
Emphasize to them that they should never allow their
children to run riot.  Enjoy this experience.  It will be
the last time you will have all the answers.


From Darwin's perspective, you are getting you ass kicked by a whole lot of people.

Quoted: HOW TO KNOW WHETHER YOU'RE READY FOR PARENTHOOD <snip> 

That's some funny stuff.

Quoted:
HOW TO KNOW WHETHER YOU'RE READY FOR PARENTHOOD

(snip)



The Grandkids make all that worth it though, really!

GM

"I'm 26 and my wife is 24. She feels as strongly about it as I do. "

It's good you both agree on this issue. That being said, don't take any permanent measures for a long while. It is possible, even remotely, that you both may change your minds. Vascectomies and tubal ligations are not easily or reliably reversible.

My wife and I decided at about 4 years of marriage not to have kids. We have been bugged to death for eight years since then. The families started to accept it about five years later. However, every new couple we meet, usually with small children, ask us why we haven't had children yet. First of all, it's none of their business, especially since we first met. Second, it almost feels like they want us to join Amway.

Our best friends decided recently to have kids, and I think they'll be wonderful parents. I think I'll concentrate on spoiling their kid, rather than have my own.

Same boat. Don't want 'em. Ever. My family stopped bugging us a LONG time ago..

Co-workers and such that get nosey are fun though. You just have to develop some instant responses.

Q: "Why don't you and your wife have any kids?"

A: "Oh, we've had half a dozen or so. They fetch a pretty penny in Mexico!"

Smarmy remark: "You'll change your mind about having kids" * I get this one from male co-workers

Canned response:" Probably just like you changed your mind about sucking dick."

Q: "Why don't you want kids? Someday you'll be old and need someone to take care of you..."

A: "I hadn't thought of it that way! I guess the eventual cheap labor might be worthwhile..."

Q:"Who's gonna take care of you when you're in a old folk's home?"

A:" Your kids..."


See, all you have to have is a bit of a sense of humor. After all, they're being rude by pressing the issue and aren't entitled to anything more!

For random strangers I usually reply with a "Oh, God no!" delivered in the same manner as if I had been asked if I would like my testicles smashed with a hammer, when asked if I have any kids.


GT

Quoted: Your just young and dumb, Why did you get married? If you are not going to have kids why did you two even get hitched? You are not making sense. And why make a statement like this in public on a forum? It shows your imaturity, keep this shit to yourself,unless you are wanting to get hammered on. What a fargin young dumbass.

Marriage is not only about having kids. Sounds like you are the fargin dumbass.

Quoted: Quoted: Your just young and dumb, Why did you get married? If you are not going to have kids why did you two even get hitched? You are not making sense. And why make a statement like this in public on a forum? It shows your imaturity, keep this shit to yourself,unless you are wanting to get hammered on. What a fargin young dumbass. Marriage is not only about having kids. Sounds like you are the fargin dumbass.

You got that right.

Quoted: After reading your post, I would say that you are obviously not ready to be blessed with God's gift of children you greedy, self-centered sniveling little shit.  You are still a child.  Grow up.

I've seen plenty of welfare moms who are ready to be blessed with God's gift of children then?

Quoted: Quoted: There is nothing like looking into your little ones eyes or seeing them smile. I understand the joy that people get from having them, but again, I just don't think it's for me.

And I understand that some people don't want to have kids, and understand why.  It's different for everyone.  I certainly respect your decision.

What I don't agree with is people saying that bringing children into the world right now is wrong and "an act of cruelty".

We need people that responsibly bring children into the world and raise them properly with good morals and values.  Otherwise things won't change.

Plus you can teach them cool stuff like this.


BTW, I just found out we're expecting our 5th.  

You shouldn't have married so young.

-1

You should never have kids until you can afford them.

+1 for not wanting kids (now)

Do not have kids, or get married before age 30.

what's one of the main problems in the western world. Low birth rates. If you won't have children, people whom you don't agree with will soon run this country. Just ask France.

Yes, that's right, I'm telling you to have kids for the sake of our country.

The world isn't overpopulated BTW, it doesn't look like Detroit everywhere.

Quoted: what's one of the main problems in the western world. Low birth rates. If you won't have children, people whom you don't agree with will soon run this country. Just ask France. Yes, that's right, I'm telling you to have kids for the sake of our country. The world isn't overpopulated BTW, it doesn't look like Detroit everywhere.

Why don't you have a whole mess of kids for us then?

Quoted: Quoted: There is nothing like looking into your little ones eyes or seeing them smile. I understand the joy that people get from having them, but again, I just don't think it's for me.

And that's understandable.  

Quoted: You should never have kids until you can afford them.

If everyone listen to this advice NO ONE would ever have kids.

Do not have kids, or get married before age 30.

Now this one i agree with.
Married first time at 20 divorced at 26 no kids.
remarried at 30 and now have a 3y/o son.

I say wait and enjoy the freedom of no attachments. get wild and crazy.. get it all out of your system.. when you get to 30 you will see life in a whole new light.

You don't need kids to "complete" the family.  You were a family the moment you said "I do."  

Entirely up to you whether you want kids or not; no one else's business but yours, and anyone who judges you on this is wrong.  It's actually a good thing you know what you DON'T want, rather than someone who think they need to have kids and finds out later they don't want them.  We've got enough of those around already.  Kids are a huge commitment of time, money and energy, because as soon as you have one, the priorities (should) shift to them being #1; not in terms of spoiling them, but simply in terms of "I'm going to do the best I can for them, to make them mature, responsible members of society."

Along the same lines:  those who talk about how parents are cruel to bring children into this world are JUST as as judgemental, and just as wrong, as the people bugging you for not having kids.  It's a personal choice; leave it at that.





Limaxray--proud parent of two young men.

Quoted: Your just young and dumb, Why did you get married? If you are not going to have kids why did you two even get hitched? You are not making sense. And why make a statement like this in public on a forum? It shows your imaturity, keep this shit to yourself,unless you are wanting to get hammered on. What a fargin young dumbass.

Quoted: After reading your post, I would say that you are obviously not ready to be blessed with God's gift of children you greedy, self-centered sniveling little shit. You are still a child. Grow up.

Sad.

Quoted: After reading your post, I would say that you are obviously not ready to be blessed with God's gift of children you greedy, self-centered sniveling little shit.  You are still a child.  Grow up.

Its going to be okay wittle boy - it's just the internet.  Don't let the other bad men here hurt your wittle feewings.

I don't want kids either. Wife and I are 35 and 36 yrs old.
Every time she talks about adopting... she does a stint of babysitting for a couple months... no more thoughts of kids.

I readily admit that I am selfish and waaaaaaay too imature to raise a child. It's been my excuse since I was around 20 or so, my decision hasn't changed yet, and I doubt it ever will.

I do enjoy children, for very short periods. I am always glad when they go home.

It's up to you but the wife and I decided a long time ago that neither one of us would be fit parents and our financial situation is another factor in no kids.
Nothing worse than seeing breeders with kids and they can't afford to take care of them. It's just a stupid irresponsible thing to do.

Quoted: Your just young and dumb, Why did you get married? If you are not going to have kids why did you two even get hitched? You are not making sense. And why make a statement like this in public on a forum? It shows your imaturity, keep this shit to yourself,unless you are wanting to get hammered on. What a fargin young dumbass.

Man, you are some jackass.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: There is nothing like looking into your little ones eyes or seeing them smile. I understand the joy that people get from having them, but again, I just don't think it's for me. And I understand that some people don't want to have kids, and understand why.  It's different for everyone.  I certainly respect your decision. What I don't agree with is people saying that bringing children into the world right now is wrong and "an act of cruelty". We need people that responsibly bring children into the world and raise them properly with good morals and values.  Otherwise things won't change.

+1.  I too respect your decision.  However, I don't understand how one can say that this isn't a good time to bring children into this world.  Was there ever a more auspicious time and high standard of living in human history than today?