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Posted: 12/7/2005 12:43:09 PM EDT
I saw a guy walking out of a store today carrying a new mixer. Now, granted, she could really be into cooking and really wanted a new mixer, but I imagined the scene on christmas morning: "Merry Christmas dear...now go bake me a cake".

What would you consider the worst possible choice as a gift for your wife?
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:45:00 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/7/2005 12:51:10 PM EDT by rob78]
a man whore?



a strap on?


edit: wedding ring?


earlier I was told "anything with a cord"



Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:45:33 PM EDT
I gave mine a crossbow once - it cost me a Zales card
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:46:08 PM EDT
Any thing that you like..
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:46:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By kill-9:
I saw a guy walking out of a store today carrying a new mixer. Now, granted, she could really be into cooking and really wanted a new mixer, but I imagined the scene on christmas morning: "Merry Christmas dear...now go bake me a cake".

What would you consider the worst possible choice as a gift for your wife?



My wife had a Kitchenaid at the top of her list last year, and was thrilled when she got it. I've gotten lots of yummy results from it.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:47:03 PM EDT
A new vacuum
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:47:52 PM EDT
A bowling ball drilled to fit YOUR hand.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:48:41 PM EDT
Toilet brush
Pinball machine
5 lb. bag of flour
Cup hooks

The list is almost endless!
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:48:44 PM EDT
A set of dusting cloths and a can of Endust.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:49:16 PM EDT
Anything you've been desperately wanting including a playboy subscription.

I can tell you electronics don't fly well on valentines day though
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:50:46 PM EDT
I bought my wife a flat panel TV for my side of the bedroom...She loved it
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:51:12 PM EDT
I got my ex a table saw for christmas once. Wrapped it up, set it next to the tree, and everything.

No, she wasn't happy.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:52:38 PM EDT

Originally Posted By ZitiForBreakfast:
I bought my wife a flat panel TV for my side of the bedroom...She loved it



seriously? In all honesty I was thinking of buying my girlfriend a flat panel tv for the bedroom.



at least I'd get to enjoy it too...
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:52:44 PM EDT
Unless specifically requested, nothing that plugs in.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:53:03 PM EDT
Last Christmas, the first three gifts my wife unwrapped were as follows:

An iron

A cookbook full of sandwich recipies

A toilet brush

I was dangerously close to going over the line.


Sheep

Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:53:32 PM EDT
A thigh master
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:54:12 PM EDT
A rubber vagina sex toy.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:54:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By HeldHostage:
Anything you've been desperately wanting including



+1
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:54:33 PM EDT

Originally Posted By SirDrinksAlot:
A thigh master



Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:54:51 PM EDT

Originally Posted By stoner63a:
Unless specifically requested, nothing that plugs in.



I made the mistake of purchasing her a new coffee maker - WRONG!!
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:55:47 PM EDT
NOTHING.....

it will get you killed!
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:56:21 PM EDT
A set of snow tires.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:57:29 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:57:39 PM EDT
Floor mats for her car. That was a big mistake.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:57:41 PM EDT
Mine said not to get her a gun.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 12:59:52 PM EDT
I think "a strap on" wins
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:00:29 PM EDT
I have a friend who is really cheap... He gets his wife a bulk pack of panties from Wal-Mart every year, like the cheap kind.
One year her got her a call phone... It was free from the carrier, he put the bill in her name and expected her to pay for it.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:02:25 PM EDT
Diet pills.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:02:46 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/7/2005 1:05:58 PM EDT by texastactical]
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:03:11 PM EDT

Originally Posted By rob78:
I was told "anything with a cord"



120V A/C beats batteries any day...

<­BR>







Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:10:18 PM EDT

Originally Posted By texastactical:
Based on a recent conversation with a certain cutie......new tires!



I'd rather have an ACOG!
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:13:38 PM EDT
My wife wants a mixer for Christmas. The thing is $280.

The stap on has to be the worst giff. But you will only get F**ked that night.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:15:47 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:17:05 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/7/2005 1:17:21 PM EDT by napalm]

Worst christmas gift ideas for your wife



Anything with a cord.



ETA:

Unless it's a Sybian.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:23:59 PM EDT
"Strap on" wins thus far.

Any household impliment with a power cord bad, exercise equipment or gym membership worse. Picking out clothing is not a good idea either.

I suspect 95% of the time a hooker for a threesome would be worse.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:24:02 PM EDT

Originally Posted By rob78:

Originally Posted By ZitiForBreakfast:
I bought my wife a flat panel TV for my side of the bedroom...She loved it



seriously? In all honesty I was thinking of buying my girlfriend a flat panel tv for the bedroom.



at least I'd get to enjoy it too...



Tell her you want to bolt it to the ceiling.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 1:26:51 PM EDT
A Divorce
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:08:42 PM EDT

Originally Posted By texastactical:

Originally Posted By Glockgirl26:

Originally Posted By texastactical:
Based on a recent conversation with a certain cutie......new tires!



I'd rather have an ACOG!



An ACOG? Whew you would owe someone alot



I was told that he should buy me that ACOG in return for the privilege of being seen in public with me. That was about the nicest thing I heard that whole week.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:14:03 PM EDT
A case of this:

Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:16:24 PM EDT
A set of kitchen knives...trust me.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:17:02 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:20:56 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/7/2005 2:21:30 PM EDT by captainpooby]

Originally Posted By 82ndAbn:
One way airfare.



Worked for me.

ETA: I lied. It was a boot.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:21:07 PM EDT



Best friends Dad got this for his wife one year, guess she couldnt take a joke because they got divorced that year
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:46:22 PM EDT

Originally Posted By FatMan:

Originally Posted By SirDrinksAlot:
A thigh master



Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!



NOT SO FAST!!

True stories.

My parents had been married about 8 months by Christmas time 1957. My dad, for their FIRST Christmas, bought my mom a pair of Army Surplus Micky Mouse boots in his size.



Money was really tight the following year because I was soon to be born. The tiny house they lived in had a fuel oil space heater. It quit & cost most of a meager paycheck to fix. My dad carefully folded the paid repair bill & wrapped it in a nice little box that had a jewelry store name on it and gave it to my mom for their second Christmas.

Age has not diminished his capacity for strange gifts either. 4 years ago he gave my wife a carton of Harley Davidson cigarettes. My wife doesn't smoke.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:48:59 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:50:57 PM EDT
A treadmill. They'll think you're trying to say they're fat and need to lose weight.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:52:27 PM EDT
I got mine a garage door opener - that worked out okay.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:53:44 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Zatu:
A treadmill. They'll think you're trying to say they're fat and need to lose weight.



You must've missed the "thighmaster" post.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:53:48 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Gnarlyfeet:
NOTHING.....

it will get you killed!



really.... funny, I gave her that last year cause that's what she's given me the last two.

Buy for the kid(s).

No Expert
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 2:56:15 PM EDT

Originally Posted By mjohn3006:
A rubber vagina sex toy.



Well at least you'll have some play.
Link Posted: 12/7/2005 3:00:35 PM EDT
capsicum lube?

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