When you have an "I hate my job" day try this:

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section. You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer made by "Q-tip." Be very sure that you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed during your therapy. Change to very comfortable clothing, such as a sweat suit and lie down on your bed.

Open the package and remove the thermometer. Carefully place it on the bedside table so that it will not become chipped or broken. Take out the written material that accompanies the thermometer and read it. You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

"Every rectal thermometer made by Q-tip is personally tested."

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in quality control at the Q-tip Company."

You can take this job and stick it up yer ass!

How can you tell the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
the taste [puke]