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Posted: 11/27/2005 11:56:14 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/24/2005 8:41:17 PM EDT by muddawggin]
Well, after constant battling with the "wife" I find out recently that there was ANOTHER guy she slept with, and another guy she sucked off. She tells me now that she feels like she should be able to go out with whoever the hell she wants, whenever she wants. She said if she feels like going alone to a guys house, she should be able to...with no consequence here. Also, she said she still wants to "go hang out" with the guy she just got done fucking!!! She said she doesn't know if she'd sleep with him again, but can't promise either way. The list goes on and on, but the bottom line is this: I called the local authorities and asked if I could up and grab the kids and head back to OR. He said "absolutely." So they now have a heads up for Wednesday, when I bail out of here. She won't know until after midnight when she gets off work. I was broke, but a buddy of mine let me borrow a grand to get it done. So, MN...c-ya later. I'm heading back out west the 21st.
Link Posted: 11/27/2005 11:58:21 PM EDT
Sorry to hear that bud.

As soon as I get married I'm quiting this site. There seems to be a curse on it. Someone piss of a witch?

Terence
Link Posted: 11/27/2005 11:58:54 PM EDT
Make sure the kids are yours....that's the first thing I'd do.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:00:02 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 11/28/2005 12:01:41 AM EDT by AROptics]
Sorry Man. Refer to the advice on Napalm's thread and GTFO!
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:00:03 AM EDT
No advice, I will say I am sorry as hell though. Hang in there. You will figure something out, and move on with your life. And eventually, she will get her just rewards. You can't go through life doing shit like this and not have it bite you in the ass.

Aviator
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:02:13 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:02:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AROptics:
Sorry Man. Refer to the advice on Napalm's thread and GTFU!



Yeah, I left a remark in his thread. I feel for that guy too. GTFU sounds pretty good to me, only I should be saying that to her. Oh HillBilly, I know the kiddos are mine...they look like me, and even I can say that. I'm more worried about what friggin disease I may have now. I found out too late if you know what I mean.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:03:59 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:05:17 AM EDT
Too late for SSS.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:06:25 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Tomislav:
Too late for SSS.




Forgive my drunken stupor, but ???
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:07:11 AM EDT
Real doll is beginning to look better and better. Even at $6K cheaper too.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:08:03 AM EDT
Not to pry but are you 150% sure?

I mean did she TELL you that she cheated or did a "friend" tell you this?

Reason why I am asking is that I too was (what I thought) 100% sure and it turned out I was 100% wrong. I thought I had all the proof and details and the source fucked up BIG time.

If you are, I too am truly sorry for you. I feel more sorry for your kids than anyone. At least you understand what is going on as shitty as it is. They dont.

Another thing I heard just last week, it used to be men were the ones that cheated more. As of the last 5 years the tables have turned.

Man, this sucks and as I said... My thoughts and prayers are with you mud... I only wish the best for you.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:09:20 AM EDT
Sorry, I just re-read the original post... you got it from the horses mouth... What did the wife say?
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:11:39 AM EDT

Originally Posted By muddawggin:

Originally Posted By Tomislav:
Too late for SSS.




Forgive my drunken stupor, but ???



Shoot, Shovel, and Shutup.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:12:00 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:15:13 AM EDT

Originally Posted By David_Hineline:
It does not matter if the kids are his or the love children of some other man, he has been raising them so they are his. You can not go anywhere else because your kids are here. Have the local sheriff serve her divorce papers at work, get the locks changed on the house and get her stuff moved to a storage locker while she is away.

She cheats because she does not respect you. She will respect you even less if you back down and let her get away with this crap.

So you either leave it alone and live with it the way it is, or you take your children and kick her out.



Big ole +1.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:22:10 AM EDT

Originally Posted By DrFrige:
Sorry, I just re-read the original post... you got it from the horses mouth... What did the wife say?



Well, see, Wed, night she didn't come home from work. Normally she gets home about 12:45 A.M. I usually go to bed about 10 or so. For some reason, I woke up at 5:30 in the morning, and she wasn't home yet. I tried time after time to call her on her cell, but no answer. So I called the sister-in-law, and explained what was up. She then let me borrow her car to see if the wife was at work. Well, the car was there, and it was the only one. I again tried and tried to call to no avail. Then shortly thereafter, she called me back, about 6:45 or so. She said she was at a "friends" and that she was safe. I said she should come home, but she insisted she didn't want to. And that she would be home afternoon on Thursday. After a truckload of calls and a bunch of hours later, she finally decided to grace me with her presence. To cut the story short, I knew something was off, so I started pressuring her with questions and finally got the answer that she gave him a BJ the weekend b4, while I was on duty. But "nothing happened when she stayed the night." Yeah, I must have idiot stamped on my head. Anyway, the shit's house she had just stayed at walked her home. Turns out he lives no more than 100 yards from me. So anyway, I chewed on her answer for a day, and simply knew thee was moew. So I told her today I was going to take a claw hammer over to his house and start breaking bones if I didn't get the truth out of her right then. She slowly proceeded to tell me she slept with him once. I could still see lies in her eye, so I kept the pressure up until I found out that there had been THREE BJ's, and three seperate acts of sex. Once in my own bed. And as stated before, my son saw him too!! So I still made her walk over to his house and tell him that she told me everything, but I just wanted to hear him tell me the truth. He did, and the stories matched up. Now the wife can't think of what to say. What the hell is there to say. I know I have been brushing and rinsing like a madman though!!
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:23:35 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Tomislav:

Originally Posted By muddawggin:

Originally Posted By Tomislav:
Too late for SSS.




Forgive my drunken stupor, but ???



Shoot, Shovel, and Shutup.



Nice...sounds appealing!
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:26:24 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:27:34 AM EDT

Originally Posted By muddawggin:

Originally Posted By DrFrige:
Sorry, I just re-read the original post... you got it from the horses mouth... What did the wife say?



Well, see, Wed, night she didn't come home from work. Normally she gets home about 12:45 A.M. I usually go to bed about 10 or so. For some reason, I woke up at 5:30 in the morning, and she wasn't home yet. I tried time after time to call her on her cell, but no answer. So I called the sister-in-law, and explained what was up. She then let me borrow her car to see if the wife was at work. Well, the car was there, and it was the only one. I again tried and tried to call to no avail. Then shortly thereafter, she called me back, about 6:45 or so. She said she was at a "friends" and that she was safe. I said she should come home, but she insisted she didn't want to. And that she would be home afternoon on Thursday. After a truckload of calls and a bunch of hours later, she finally decided to grace me with her presence. To cut the story short, I knew something was off, so I started pressuring her with questions and finally got the answer that she gave him a BJ the weekend b4, while I was on duty. But "nothing happened when she stayed the night." Yeah, I must have idiot stamped on my head. Anyway, the shit's house she had just stayed at walked her home. Turns out he lives no more than 100 yards from me. So anyway, I chewed on her answer for a day, and simply knew thee was moew. So I told her today I was going to take a claw hammer over to his house and start breaking bones if I didn't get the truth out of her right then. She slowly proceeded to tell me she slept with him once. I could still see lies in her eye, so I kept the pressure up until I found out that there had been THREE BJ's, and three seperate acts of sex. Once in my own bed. And as stated before, my son saw him too!! So I still made her walk over to his house and tell him that she told me everything, but I just wanted to hear him tell me the truth. He did, and the stories matched up. Now the wife can't think of what to say. What the hell is there to say. I know I have been brushing and rinsing like a madman though!!



Dude, I am speechless. I dont know what to say nor can I picture or know what to do if I were in your shoes. As David Hineline said, be the stronger person, there will be more respect for you and GET THE KIDS!

fucking unreal!
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:28:50 AM EDT
Rule #1 of gun safety: Don't mess with another man's woman.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:31:26 AM EDT
He lives 100 yards away from you and he's still breathing without assistance?

He better thank God that you have some restraint.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:45:06 AM EDT
The one thing you can't do is continue to stay with this woman. She can no longer be trusted and has proved this.

If you ask me, she has already made the decision for you. The only thing left to debate is the kids and how that part of the situation can be dealt with.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 12:54:19 AM EDT
Stay with her and insist on counciling. Also make sure that you do not have intimate contact with her until she has been tested. Minimum 3 months to make sure that she does not have something nasty incubating.

Also spend as much time as you can with your kids. Get them out of the house whenever possible so you can spend time alone with them doing fun stuff.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:02:08 AM EDT
Put her ass on the curb. She can go live with that bastard.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:04:27 AM EDT
I dont think staying with her is the right thing to do even if kids are involved. If she cheated once on you she will do it again. This happened to me Found out my wife was fooling around on me. My Family, her Family and my wife begged me to stay and work this out. I stayed with her for a year and a half. She got Pregnant, Now with an 8 month son my wife is up to her old ways. So we decided to call it quits.

I am moving on with my life the best I can work on getting by one day at a time. Spend everyday off with my son.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:08:11 AM EDT
Put anything you have of value in storage and get a lawyer.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:12:19 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:16:33 AM EDT
I have no clue what you are going through man, but I feel bad for you. You seem like you have a cool head and that will be your advantage right now. If it were me I'd probably be sitting in jail for doing something stupid. Good luck and try to get those kids and yourself away from her as soon as you can.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:17:10 AM EDT
Here's a kewl animated .gif to cheer you up!

Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:19:17 AM EDT
No offense, but if someone cheats, its over in my book. I would NEVER be able to look at her the same. EVER. Plus, if they do it once, they'll do it again.

Dont hold a marriage together just for children. You wont be happy together, so it'll have a negative impact on the kids.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:20:59 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1GUNRUNNER:

Originally Posted By inzane123:
Stay with her and insist on counciling. Also make sure that you do not have intimate contact with her until she has been tested. Minimum 3 months to make sure that she does not have something nasty incubating.




Are you inzane?!



That's better advice than SSS . I know some of you would dream of doing that but I sure wish you'd think of this guys real state of mind right now and not advise him to do things that will land him in prison away from his kids.

I hope things work out for you Muddawggin. Lifes tough but your a Soldier so I believe your tougher. Hang in there and get through this. Keep your kids in mind and don't do anything rough. Sorry
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 1:24:11 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1GUNRUNNER:

Originally Posted By inzane123:
Stay with her and insist on counciling. Also make sure that you do not have intimate contact with her until she has been tested. Minimum 3 months to make sure that she does not have something nasty incubating.




Are you inzane?!



No. He's part of a new club!

Calling cmjohnson! Forgiveness advice, stat!
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 2:12:56 AM EDT

Originally Posted By mattimeo:

Originally Posted By 1GUNRUNNER:

Originally Posted By inzane123:
Stay with her and insist on counciling. Also make sure that you do not have intimate contact with her until she has been tested. Minimum 3 months to make sure that she does not have something nasty incubating.




Are you inzane?!



No. He's part of a new club!

Calling cmjohnson! Forgiveness advice, stat!




Don't knock him. If he can do all that bullshit he says, he's a better man than me.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 2:30:41 AM EDT
Am I the only pyscho in this forum. I would, at a minimum shoot the guy she was with and her and spend the rest of my life in prison. Then again is it the guy she's cheating with's fault. NO! and Yes! if he know's she is married then he can die too.

It would not be fair to the kids though to kill off their mom and leave them with no parents while I sit in jail for it. I walked in on my girl friend once just before she and a guy were about to get jiggy with it. He was sitting on the floor saying sweet nothings to her and she was on the bed in her night gown.

I came in with pistol grip 12 gauge in hand and gave him an evil grin. She claimed that he would not leave so she decided to just go upstairs to bed and he followed. Well he left in a hurry and called the police from up the street at the nearest phone booth.

I was gone and at home before they arrived. They asked her to press charges against me for B and E but she refused. I do not know what I would have done if they would have been doing the humpty hump when I walked in.

I feel sorry for a fellow ARF commer that this happend.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 2:32:35 AM EDT

Originally Posted By vanilla_gorilla:
Put her ass on the curb. She can go live with that bastard.




HELL YEAH, in fact throw her ass out nakid and lock the doors. Then tell her parents, and then lawyer up.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 2:35:01 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:04:37 AM EDT
Sounds totally screwed up.

My x-wife cheated on me too. Things will get worse (I know that doesn't cheer you up). You never watched the show "Cheaters" have you?...Those spouses are always soooo apologetic when they get caught. Moments before, they where happily sucking-face with someone else.

My sound advice...start quietly putting everything you want to keep, in a monthly storage facility. Tell no one. Sorry to say, you really can't tell who your "friends" are. I lost half of my property, when she finally split, with a U-Haul.

Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:12:46 AM EDT
A proper application of Tannerite will solve the problem.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:17:20 AM EDT

Originally Posted By inzane123:
Stay with her and insist on counciling. Also make sure that you do not have intimate contact with her until she has been tested. Minimum 3 months to make sure that she does not have something nasty incubating.

Also spend as much time as you can with your kids. Get them out of the house whenever possible so you can spend time alone with them doing fun stuff.



Are ya fuckin kidding me?!???

Counseling?!???????????!!!!!??­???????????

That bitch needs her fuckin head kicked in with a Kodiak steel-toed work boot.


Cheating is despicable and NOT tolerated.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:17:34 AM EDT

Originally Posted By UNIT6639:
Am I the only pyscho in this forum. I would, at a minimum shoot the guy she was with and her and spend the rest of my life in prison. Then again is it the guy she's cheating with's fault. NO! and Yes! if he know's she is married then he can die too.

It would not be fair to the kids though to kill off their mom and leave them with no parents while I sit in jail for it. I walked in on my girl friend once just before she and a guy were about to get jiggy with it. He was sitting on the floor saying sweet nothings to her and she was on the bed in her night gown.

I came in with pistol grip 12 gauge in hand and gave him an evil grin. She claimed that he would not leave so she decided to just go upstairs to bed and he followed. Well he left in a hurry and called the police from up the street at the nearest phone booth.

I was gone and at home before they arrived. They asked her to press charges against me for B and E but she refused. I do not know what I would have done if they would have been doing the humpty hump when I walked in.

I feel sorry for a fellow ARF commer that this happend.



LoL, sounds like you are a psycho. Its not the guys fault, hes just trying to get some. In every situation like this, it is the married person's fault, not the other party.

And yes I'm married. If I found out that my wife was cheating on me, I would have no anger at the man. He didn't make her do anything. She has free will.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:20:58 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Tallbill:

Originally Posted By UNIT6639:
Am I the only pyscho in this forum. I would, at a minimum shoot the guy she was with and her and spend the rest of my life in prison. Then again is it the guy she's cheating with's fault. NO! and Yes! if he know's she is married then he can die too.

It would not be fair to the kids though to kill off their mom and leave them with no parents while I sit in jail for it. I walked in on my girl friend once just before she and a guy were about to get jiggy with it. He was sitting on the floor saying sweet nothings to her and she was on the bed in her night gown.

I came in with pistol grip 12 gauge in hand and gave him an evil grin. She claimed that he would not leave so she decided to just go upstairs to bed and he followed. Well he left in a hurry and called the police from up the street at the nearest phone booth.

I was gone and at home before they arrived. They asked her to press charges against me for B and E but she refused. I do not know what I would have done if they would have been doing the humpty hump when I walked in.

I feel sorry for a fellow ARF commer that this happend.



LoL, sounds like you are a psycho. Its not the guys fault, hes just trying to get some. In every situation like this, it is the married person's fault, not the other party.

And yes I'm married. If I found out that my wife was cheating on me, I would have no anger at the man. He didn't make her do anything. She has free will.



Takes 2 to tango.

I would be pissed at both parties, more so the married one though.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:28:51 AM EDT

Originally Posted By muddawggin:

Originally Posted By DrFrige:
Sorry, I just re-read the original post... you got it from the horses mouth... What did the wife say?



Well, see, Wed, night she didn't come home from work. Normally she gets home about 12:45 A.M. I usually go to bed about 10 or so. For some reason, I woke up at 5:30 in the morning, and she wasn't home yet. I tried time after time to call her on her cell, but no answer. So I called the sister-in-law, and explained what was up. She then let me borrow her car to see if the wife was at work. Well, the car was there, and it was the only one. I again tried and tried to call to no avail. Then shortly thereafter, she called me back, about 6:45 or so. She said she was at a "friends" and that she was safe. I said she should come home, but she insisted she didn't want to. And that she would be home afternoon on Thursday. After a truckload of calls and a bunch of hours later, she finally decided to grace me with her presence. To cut the story short, I knew something was off, so I started pressuring her with questions and finally got the answer that she gave him a BJ the weekend b4, while I was on duty. But "nothing happened when she stayed the night." Yeah, I must have idiot stamped on my head. Anyway, the shit's house she had just stayed at walked her home. Turns out he lives no more than 100 yards from me. So anyway, I chewed on her answer for a day, and simply knew thee was moew. So I told her today I was going to take a claw hammer over to his house and start breaking bones if I didn't get the truth out of her right then. She slowly proceeded to tell me she slept with him once. I could still see lies in her eye, so I kept the pressure up until I found out that there had been THREE BJ's, and three seperate acts of sex. Once in my own bed. And as stated before, my son saw him too!! So I still made her walk over to his house and tell him that she told me everything, but I just wanted to hear him tell me the truth. He did, and the stories matched up. Now the wife can't think of what to say. What the hell is there to say. I know I have been brushing and rinsing like a madman though!!



Ma I am sorry this has happened to you, but I can't help but say that you made a grave mistake by threatening violence to get the story. If she has a half a brain and is devious she will get a restraining order against you and then you are screwed. Be careful, I think at this point you have to move out and get as far away as you can. Good luck.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:31:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 11/28/2005 3:49:36 AM EDT by Ragnaroc]
Good luck.
I took my cheating biatch of a girlfriend back and just found out yesterday that when she claimed to have gotten stuck in a truck, that her and her girlfriend were drinking beer and getting stoned with a single man that lives out of town a ways.
I don't think my girlfriend has smoked in ten years, but her friend does.

She even got pissed that I called her aunt looking for her because I was worried and was getting ready to go looking for them since they said they were going for a ride out of town. Stupid fucking me, never even entered my mind that they were going to that guys house until I was told.

Typical that she would get pissed at me, call it a defence mechanism. When she fucked my brother when I was running a track-dozer for 16 hours straight, she met me at the door with,"WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU?"

After all the shit I have been through, just the lie is enough proof for me, I am done.

I also have kids, can't just up and leave either.

Sorry to hijack, but I know exactly how the hell you feel and I don't know what the fuck to do either.

Once again, good luck, and try not to let it screw with your head too much.

ETA-Anyone planning on moving up here better bring a good woman with you because there is a severe shortage in this state.

Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:42:05 AM EDT
Similar thing happened to me. I found it while overseas. I couldn't get a phone call through to home so I called a neighbor. He said there was a moving van at my house. I was able to get back home within the week to find my house completely empty (except for the trash and used you know ).

I found out from the neighbors that everytime I went overseas, there would be strange men around. The babysitter confirmed this.

I always knew something wasn't right. In addition, she was a miserable bitch probably because she took me for granted. I'm sure if you think about it, there are signs that were pointing to her extracurricular activity. I grew up in a broken home and was bound and determined to stick it out. By leaving like she did, she did me the biggest favor in the world.

My advise to you is, leave her but do it in a non emotional and systematic way. Consult an attorney. Best one you can find that way she can't get the best attorney. The file for custody and divorice. The first to the docket has the advantage.

Good luck.......no matter how the custody turns out, you'll still be in your kids life and you will find a good woman. Since you live in the same town, you'll most likely get 50/50 custody. Try to live so that the kids are in the same school district as they are now, it will help the cause.

Bomber
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:50:14 AM EDT
What about a good old fashioned stoning in the town square?
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 3:59:10 AM EDT
Unbelievable....literally.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 4:13:03 AM EDT
Sorry to hear it.Don't know what I'd do-can't even imagine being in such a situation.She obviously has no respect for you,and I don't think that that is something I could ever get past.BUT,you have kids and THEY come first.Do whatever you can to minimize the impact on them.Protect yourself and your property,but also shield your kids as much as possible from the nastiness.Try not to let them get caught in the middle,and used as pawns,although she may.Good luck.You'll get past this.Spend as much time as you can with your kids.Love them.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 4:19:26 AM EDT
Wow... a lot of threads on this subject lately.

Must be that time of the year.
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 4:31:07 AM EDT

Originally Posted By operatorerror:
He lives 100 yards away from you and he's still breathing without assistance?

He better thank God that you have some restraint.




This has absolutely nothing to do with the "other man." This is ALL about his wife.

Good advice that he needs to kick her out.

NOW

CMOS
Link Posted: 11/28/2005 4:33:11 AM EDT
Had a close friend who found out what his former stripper trash wife was up to, and then hung himself. From what we understand, she told him that thier youngest child was really someone elses during an angry fit of rage to hurt him as much as possible. What a complete waste of a good man, as he couldn't imagine that life could ever get better. Life does get better, and what he did is an example of what NOT to do.

As for his trashy widow, she took $300K in insurance money and lived it up for a while. We all figure she is a broke crack whore by now.

There is a lot of good advice here from various ARFCOMMERS, keep a cool head and realize that life does get better, keep yourself at a safe distance from her damaging you any more.

Be there for your kids, they will appreciate that you did not let them down. Do not let her actions cause you to hurt yourself or anyone else, try to imagine how nice the future will be someday when all this dust settles and you move on. The future will be much better than you think...

Remember, actions have consequences - choose your actions very carefully or she will destroy you too - don't give her that satisfaction.
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