For all of our "Babylon 5" friends! YOU KNOW YOU'VE BEEN WATCHING BABYLON 5 TOO MUCH WHEN...*************************************************
* your hairstyle matches Londo's.
* your sexual fantasies include Delenn.
* your color is hot pink.
* you believe that in a past life you were a member of the Grey Council.
* you can't shake the feeling that B4 is DS9.
* the only ancient history you know is Babylon's.
* you pretend to blackmail Londo.
* there is a hole in your mind.
* you think vulcans are members of the Psi Corps.
* you wonder who would win a fight between a minbari and a vulcan.
* your .newsrc is exactly "rec.arts.sf.tv.babylon5: 1-3406".
* you keep saying "data crystal" instead of "diskette".
* you finger
[email protected] and wonder why doesn't it work... then you remember that he's now sinclair@ea_embassy.minbar.gov... it doesn't work either, and then you conclude it must be a problem with the nameserver.
* someone uses insecticide, you shout "Do you wanna kill N'grath? Are you mad?"... then you don't understand why everyone stares at you.
* you try to watch Mutai fights on ESPN. .. you actually call them to complain about it.
* you want to brain wipe someone you really hate.
* you think Darth Vader is a vorlon.
* you think Chekov was really Bester doing an undercover spying mission.
* you want to become monk of the Third Fain of Chudomo.
* you believe the Grim Reaper is a *Soul Hunter.*
* you wonder what did Captain Kirk do during the Earth/Minbari war.
* you wanna know if there are any xenobiology courses in med school.
* you ask politics experts wether Al Gore has got the flu already.
* you are upset because CNN doesn't report anything about Ragesh 3.
* you wonder what's wrong when you calculate your age as >300.
* your biggest worry is narn expansionism.
* you fart, and that makes you think of vorlons.
* you keep on thinking what went wrong in the Battle of the Line.
* your first son has just been born, and you can't think of any names other than Londo, Lennier and Kosh.
* you pretend to spend some vacations on Mars.
* your dreams include something scary about flutes made up of bones.
* you're afraid that your soul will escape if you're cut open.
* you think Ivanova *IS* God.
* you ask the Air Force recruiter about the Starfury Training Program.
* you go to the produce section of the grocery store and ask if their spoo is fresh.
* your wardrobe consists of nothing but white, military-pressed collarless shirts and military pressed slacks.
* you wonder who would win a testosterone battle between Garibaldi and Tim Allen.
* you tell the plastic surgeon you want to have an operation to make you an anatomically correct Centauri.
* you have a bumper sticker that says "My other car's a Starfury".
* you have a bumper sticker that says "Warning: Fully loaded Cobra Bay in trunk".
* you have made a PPG.
* you start scouring the world to try and find enough Quantium-40 to make a jump-point generator.
* you change from zip then fasten to fasten, then zip.
* your WWW client's hot list has over 100 entries and 95% of them point to Babylon 5 pages.
* you keep a notepad and pencil next to your bed so that you can write down what Kosh says in your dreams, should Kosh happen to appear.
* at work, you don't go to strikes because of fear of the Rush Act.
* you go asking everyone "What do you want?".
* you wonder why Lt. Barclay bears a striking resemblance to that demented war vet in B5's "Downbelow"... and you wonder how Bester and this war vet got to different Enterprises in different centuries via the same rift that ate B4.
* the phone rings, and instead of picking up the receiver you tap the back of your hand.
* you go to the aquarium and wonder if there's any significance to the fact that there's a kind of fish called the Garibaldi.
* you call your cable operator and ask what cable package comes with ISN.
* you are watching Letterman when the camera flashes to the audience. Two women are sitting quietly, not laughing at the jokes and wearing black gloves. You immediately shout, "Psicorps!"
* you wreck your car on the highway by spinning the wheel fully around while traveling at 80 miles per hour, trying to imitate Sheridan as he's leaving the station in "All Alone in the Night."
* you wonder where the hell is that clean, efficient Minbari power source for your new motorcycle.
* you catch yourself looking for rangers in the background while watching an opera.
* you skive off work just to see what the TV listings magazines have to say about the new episode within an hour of them appearing on the shelves.
* you call your travel agent and try to arrange passage to Minbar and get directions to the Earth embassy.
* you're planning your vacation, and the only place that appeals to you is Molari State Park.
* you bite into some fried chicken and say, "Hey, tastes just like Narn!".
* you see "Norton utilities for people", and your brain sees "Morden utilities for people".
* you'd like to introduce your sister to Lennier.
* you begin fantasizing political conspiracies at your family reunion.
* you wish you could stand up when driving your car.
* the entire weekend is devoted to preparing and eating one meal.
* while watching football, all the blockers look kinda like Kosh.
* when conversing with a Star Wars fan you claim that "my shadows can kick your Dark Side's butt".
* Barney and Baby Bop look like a viable alien race.
* you begin to wonder if Bester and Dianna Troi are related.
* you fantasize about how JMS would have written "The Andy Griffith Show".
* you realize that the "Psychic Friends Network" is actually the PR division of the Psi Corps.
* you are spending the night in a shelter to wait out hurricane Rita, and your only thought is "I'm going to miss Babylon 5 tonight for sure!"
* you are disappointed that your newspaper's religion page doesn't list a Foundationist church.
* your dreams don't simply include B5 characters and scenes, instead they are full new episodes.
* you trust the Psi-Corps, because the Corps is your friend.
* you try alligator at a restaurant, and all you can think of to say is "Tastes like Narn!".
* you have always been here.
* you go to the basement and expect to find a moment of perfect beauty in the darkness.
* you look for airlocks to shove irritating people through.
* "Scrag 'em" and "Space 'em" have become part of your normal vocabulary.
* you call B5-related conversations "dis-kosh-ion"s.
* you think genies were Shadow agents.
* you back off whenever people ask "What do you want?"
* you see a spline-based screen saver, and immediately wonder if Abel Horne has just interfaced with Control via that computer.
* you actually try to make sense out of which side the red thing on Ivanova's uniform is facing on a particular episode.
* you turn a mis-printed M&M upside-down and see the Psi Corps logo instead of an "m".
* you ask jewelry stores if they carry gravity-control rings.
* you offer to bring the little pices of red fruit to a friend's wedding. .. and then can't keep yourself from saying 'And so it begins' during the ceremony.
* And the most important of all is: you worship JMS.