I filled up a guys locker with shaving cream once...well, I almost did before he caught me.  That was a fun fight.

Sgtar15

HS. I had a band that the drummer had a 17 piece kit... just awesome. And we used to play in the basement of my house. One night about 10:00 he calls me to tell me that he has new skins and he wants to put them on his drums. I told him NO it was late.

Sure enough at like 10:30 he knocks at the door and says I will be out in less than half an hour just let me put these on so I can have them ready for tomorrows practice.

I was pissed.

The next day I run my ass home and take the skins off his drum and replace it with plastic wrap and stretch them real tight. He is so excited and goes to play them. His sticks go right through the plastic wrap... whooooo he was so pissed at me... So what!

Another time I took the four screws out of the back of my guitarists' guitar... you know, the ones that hold the neck on. and had his guitar just sitting on the stand.

Oh the good old days.

This is no SH#T: ( A sea story)

One of the guys in the V-6 division of the Coral Sea got thrown in the brig for a couple of days for some minor infraction.    
The one thing you don't want to do is brig time on a ship because there's a detachment of Marines assigned just to guard the Captain, the Nucs and the Brig.  They always seemed to be eager to make a swabs life even more miserable than it already is.
After the the kid gets out of the brig, one night about 03:00 he sneaks down and snakes a fire hose down into the marines berthing compartment with the nozzle turned on, then he went back to the main valve and charged the line!  Saltwater sprayed the Jarheads down pretty good and probably knocked more than a few of them around before they got control of the hose.  You should have seen those guys come boiling up through the hatch, soaking wet and madder than wet hens.
Of course the kid was long gone.  He was never caught. It just made your heart fill with pride.  
He became a legend and a hero to the ships company.  
The Marines posted a guard at the hatch after that.

GO NAVY!

Worst I ever did in high school was get a few other guys from the football team to put our shop teachers Suzuki Samurai in between two trees, so close to the bumpers that the damn thing wouldn't EVER get out.

After high school, the worst one is truly a story...
A bud had called one night, and after a long time of working as the only evening shift guy at a video rental shop, the storefinally hired some more help, and it was that guys first night. Call Jerry up and tell him to bring his starter pistol and some of his blanks. We pull pantyhose over our heads and jump in just at closing time, and take both guys into the back of the store. Put newguy down on the floor and blindfold him, then get our friend up and we all go out into the front of the store, after admonishing him not to move or even breathe. Then we start yelling at our bud and Jerry pops off one of those blanks, then...quiet, with sobbing from the back room and nothing else. That guy hated us forver for that. We were lucky no cops saw us or we'd be dead for sure.

One night two of my friends and I went on a rampage. We stole concrete lawn ornaments from peoples lawns and put them on our other friends lawns...for sale signs, garbage bags...anything. We also took one of these "gazing balls" those colored glass orbs and dropped it off of "hangman's bridge" (named such after a guy comitted suicide by hanging a few years prior). Under the bridge ran railroad tracks....and with a full moon, that globe shattered into a million sparkles.

Anyway, we also went behind the local trucking company and stole a couple of old semi tires and rolled them down the steepest hill in town (3:00 a.m.) The one Ryan rolled stayed on the road an went several blocks...the one I rolled took a left turn and smashed somebody's patio set.

We then went and stole one of those concrete "Fishing boy" stautes from a yard of a jack-ass. Unfortunately, he was awake at this point and saw us...he was screaming You little fuckers...I'm calling the cops....too late, we had his statue and threw it into the back of Ryan's car and headed off to "hangman's Bridge".....along the way, we stole somebody's clothes line. We tied a noose out of the clothesline and the other end was tied to the railing of the bridge. We then pushed the fishing boy off the railing expecting him to just hang there. Wrong...the rope broke and he hit the rail below and shattered....oops.

The next morning, I get a call from the juvenile officer (he and I were on a first name basis)...he tells me to come up to the station and to bring my friend Ryan.
After a 30 minute lecture about stealing the fishing boy statue...were are told we need to bring it back....we tell him we can't..it broke. Well then we are to either replace it or pay compensation. We decide to pay compensation...The jackass only wanted $30.00 for comp. Fine..we fork over $30.00.

Remeber that we had another friend along? This is where it gets funny. We called Phil and told him we got busted, but we didn't give the police his name as being with us...but we had to pay for the statue......we told him it was $90.00 so he forked over $30.00. Ryan and I never told him the true cost.


We also ran a fire hose into the hallway at school.....the hydrants would be flushed evey so often in town. One was right by the school parking lot, so instead of flooding the lot, they would attach a hose to the hydrant and run the water into the street. It was just long enough to get it into the hallway....never got caught.

We set off a brick of firecrakers in the tunnel leading to the locker rooms under the gym. We made a makeshift time delay using a birthday cake candle, and a clump of modeling clay. After sitting in class for about 5 minutes...the souns of those firecrakers going off echoed like crazy in school....never got caught

There are plenty more, but I don't have the time to type them...

Quoted: And the best...Had an old fire extinguisher, you could unthread the draw tube/trigger assembly and fill it with whatever you like. It even had a tire valve on it so you could pressure it up to the "green" area on the guage and if the substance was thin enough, blast it out with some pretty good force. D. AZEX

Got shot at and chased after we hosed down the prick that owned the movie theater.

About 5th grade after Valentine's Day.  took some soap and carved it into little pieces.  Melted some chocolate and dipped the little suckers in it.  Mixed in with the real stuff and took to school.  Cool thing is my mom helped me with it.

Imagine the outrage if you tried that today.

Guess that was the start of it.

One of my favorite pranks in college was "Letters from the Dean" to the mark using borrowed letterhead and a signature stamp.  One particular senior thought for an entire week (spring break) he wasn't going to graduate.

Tagged!

I was a mean SOB to the people that got on my wrong side and being that i have the typical scandinavian hulkis build i didn't fear anyone. so to get back at some jocks that thought their shit didn't stink and picked on me for no reason, i unloaded canister of pepper spray in the guys locker room when all the jocks i despised were in there.  
Psssssssssssttt....   WTF was that? ..... cough cough cough.. ahhhh fuck what the hell ow ow ow WTFs going on ow OW  COUGH OW.  they heard me laughing my ass off and knew i was the one that did it when they came barreling out of the locker room for fresh air.   I've never been called that  many names and been threated to be killed so many times..    
had a run in with a couple of them a week later when they tried to chain the grill of my vehicle to a pole, other then that i was left alone by them from then on.

During my freshman year of highschool, some friends and I got together with our ATV's and plenty O' Beer.  It was Halloween night so we decided to get buzzed and play a few pranks.  Growing up in a small town in the Northeastern portion of the country, we knew all of the back roads and trails leading to and from our tiny little town.  We took a scarecrow from a local garden, gathered some rope, a pumpkin head, ziplock bag, grape jelly, cottage cheese and frozen pieces of cauliflower.  Into the ziplock back we put all fo the ingredients and put the back into the pumpkin head.  We affixed the head to the scarecrow and put the rope through the belt loops.  

We traveled about 5 miles out of town to a place where the main road was staight for a mile so that we could see cars coming from a distance.  On either side of the road was 20 foot cliffs from where the rock had been blasted to keep the road level.  We positioned ourselves on top and waited for a car to come.  After about 30 minutes and several beers, a car finally came.  It was very dark at this time of night.  As the car approached, we threw the scarecrow onto the windshield and quickly retreived it.  The head exploded perfectly.  Cottage cheese, jelly and cauliflower spread all over the car and road like brain matter and blood! The driver locked on the brakes and turned on his blues.  It was the state police.  We immediatly high tailed it out of there and continued our partying.  The state police officer was always an ass, so we didn't feel so bad about it!

I know someone who knows someone who .....

knew a mental midget that was deserving someone's wrath.
His pickup was his pride and joy.

A local sporting goods store used to sell skunk cover scent.
In case anyone cares to know, you can use a syringe and needle to
squirt said liquid between the sections of the sliding back glass.

3-foot long piece of plastic tubing can extend the reach of a can of "GreatStuff"
expanding insulating foam enough that you can empty the contents into a muffler.

Knowing the kind of vehicle before the attack, go to a store and buy enough
key blanks for every door.

Using a Dremel moto-tool, grind a fishhook notch into one side.
THEN grind the handle part of the key so it will snap off under pressure.
Insert said keys into both door locks.

For the icing on the cake, a time delay.
Cut the gas cap strap and take his gas cap.
Replace his gas cap with a locking cap.
Keep the key.

So first the guy needs a lock smith to open the truck.
THEN the guy spends hours cleaning the skunk smell.
THEN the truck won't run when he tries to start it.
A few days later he is stranded at the service station because he
doesn't have enough gas to get home, and he can't get the gas cap off.

Quoted: I know someone who knows someone who ..... knew a mental midget that was deserving someone's wrath. His pickup was his pride and joy. A local sporting goods store used to sell skunk cover scent. In case anyone cares to know, you can use a syringe and needle to squirt said liquid between the sections of the sliding back glass. 3-foot long piece of plastic tubing can extend the reach of a can of "GreatStuff" expanding insulating foam enough that you can empty the contents into a muffler. Knowing the kind of vehicle before the attack, go to a store and buy enough key blanks for every door. Using a Dremel moto-tool, grind a fishhook notch into one side. THEN grind the handle part of the key so it will snap off under pressure. Insert said keys into both door locks. For the icing on the cake, a time delay. Cut the gas cap strap and take his gas cap. Replace his gas cap with a locking cap. Keep the key. So first the guy needs a lock smith to open the truck. THEN the guy spends hours cleaning the skunk smell. THEN the truck won't run when he tries to start it. A few days later he is stranded at the service station because he doesn't have enough gas to get home, and he can't get the gas cap off.

you win the prize for the best diobolical plan.

Oh man, I'll have to come back and list a few more later on tonight when I have time...

The last one we did I heard that was good.

Ingredients:

1 School Spirit Day
1 Large expensive fountain set behind a stage
1 Annoying University President to stand on said stage
1 Roll of monofilament fishing line (25# test should suffice)
2 balls of predetermined size that you find at Wal*Mart in those big tower things that are safeguarded by the bungee cords that are filled with air and bounce really well
1 gallon of liquid dish detergent
1 pair diving goggles
1 pair bolt cutters
4 sneaky college sophomores (can be substituted)

Find the vent that covers the small turbine that drives the water into the fountain's pump. Cut it off. Take one of the balls from Wal*Mart and push it into the opening you've created, make sure it gets cut up by the turbine. Fill the other ball with dish detergent, as much as it will take, then make sure you use an innertube repair kit over the spot where you filled the detergent in, just in case. Tie it in place with the monofilament line so that when one of the lines is cut properly the ball will go into the vent. Take that one line and run it 7 feet off the ground to an appropriate hiding spot. Wait until the Star Spangled Banner is done and then cut the line. You should start to get bubbles in about a minute. They won't stop for awhile.

The ball we the purveyors of this exersice used was about 1-1/2' in diameter.

I was friends with one of the prop managers during one of our school plays...there was an act where one actor was required to unroll a scroll and read some announcement....the scroll was one of those Roman times  kind...real ornate....I snuck into the prop area one day and pasted all kinds of porno pics on the scroll.....when the actor opened it up to read...he stumbled and could not remember his lines....the only words that came out were "Holy Shit!...Um..err...ahhhh"....another actor had to step up and ad-lib to cover the scene. It was hilarious!

Ok one last one I did.  I can't tell you all as that will give away all my secrets.

3am I arived at this assholes house.  
I placed a strip of 200 black cats on the ledge under a window, my targets room.
I lit it and ran, those damn things started going off sooner than I thought.  
Realizing I wouldn't be able to get away fast enough I hid under the the next door neighbor's porch.
That guys Father was out there with a flashlight just as I crawled under that porch. Probably less than 10 seconds after they went off
To this day I've never heard so many cuss words at one time.
I stayed under that porch for the next two hours before I started walking back home.

I have the coolest boss ever. In addition to walking in one day with a sword bigger than she is strapped to her back, she helped arrange a practical joke against one of our co-workers. He's an annoying kid; hard-working but an idiot. So we decided to set him straight by putting the fear of God into him.

One of my friends was the idiot's partner on the night shift. I headed out and parked behind the restaurant, wearing all black and a t-shirt ninja mask. Beside me on the seat was my blackened wakizashi and tanto. When there were no customers in the store and the idiot was up front, my partner on the inside opened the back door and let me in. We posed in the classic hostage position, hand around his nack with knife at his throat (sharp edge pointed safely away) and my longer weapon pointed in the direction the idiot would be coming when he rounded the corner. We made one last check on the monitor that no customers were in or approaching the store, then we began.

"Ian! Hey Ian! Fuck, get back here man, quick!"

So the idiot drops what he's doing and heads to the back where we were. Just as he rounds the corner, my 'hostage' says "We're bein' robbed man!" and I tell him to get down on the floor face-first and put his hands on his head. Instead, he sort of jumps in surprise without leaving the ground (giving the impression that he was stretching to the ceiling), spins around and runs for the door. The only thing that kept him from fleeing and leaving his fellow co-worker for dead was our hilarious laughter. He even had a tiny moist spot on the front of his pants, though it was barely noticable. It was great. He was simultaneously relieved at not being in a life-or-death situation and pissed at us for scaring the shit out of him. It took him fifteen minutes to quit shaking from the adrenaline rush.

So I decided to soothe the guy by making him my partner and getting the boss' son with the same prank the next night. He agrees, and I decide to up the joke slightly by exchanging my real swords for a replica pistol. In this case, it was a Transformers Megatron that turned into a rather realistic Walther P-38 and shot spring-loaded projectiles.

So I show up behind the store at the appointed time and wait for him to come unlock the door when nobody is in the store. I sat there for 45 minutes waiting, wondering just how freaking busy they were this close to closing time. Eventually, the door opens and the boss' son comes out with the trash and says hi to me and asks why I'm there. I explain what I'm doing sitting in an alley at night with a mask and fake gun and he tells me that the idiot had told him all about the joke played on him the night before. The dumbass not only forgot to let me in, he forgot not to tell the mark about the joke we were going to pull on him. So he lets me in the back and I sat back there for ten minutes waiting. The idiot rounds the corner to get cups and I jump up and start screaming at him for leaving me hanging. He starts blathering about forgetting and I shoot him in the forehead with a plastic pellet and cuss him out. Kid nearly wet his pants again.

I'm a bit of a legend around my workplace, but fortunately nobody outside knows of half the crap I've done.

Quoted: I know someone who knows someone who ..... knew a mental midget that was deserving someone's wrath. His pickup was his pride and joy. A local sporting goods store used to sell skunk cover scent. In case anyone cares to know, you can use a syringe and needle to squirt said liquid between the sections of the sliding back glass. 3-foot long piece of plastic tubing can extend the reach of a can of "GreatStuff" expanding insulating foam enough that you can empty the contents into a muffler. Knowing the kind of vehicle before the attack, go to a store and buy enough key blanks for every door. Using a Dremel moto-tool, grind a fishhook notch into one side. THEN grind the handle part of the key so it will snap off under pressure. Insert said keys into both door locks. For the icing on the cake, a time delay. Cut the gas cap strap and take his gas cap. Replace his gas cap with a locking cap. Keep the key. So first the guy needs a lock smith to open the truck. THEN the guy spends hours cleaning the skunk smell. THEN the truck won't run when he tries to start it. A few days later he is stranded at the service station because he doesn't have enough gas to get home, and he can't get the gas cap off.

Quoted: I'm not proud of  this but, I once took a leak in one of those tan salt shakers at a local mcdonalds....needless to say the next week cameras had been installed, and you had to ask for salt at the register

You will not make any friends here for that one. You should ask about the "wing hunt"...

Quoted: Made a huge smoke bomb and then started taking bets that I could get everyone the day off from school. My buddy then planned a party at his house for our day off. That sucker burned the floor pretty good and we got the day off. Collected my winnings at the party and met some nice girls.

 Boy does that sound familiar!  Nothing like huge plumes of gray smoke rolling down the hallways.  Ah, the memories..

IN college, I was dating a hottie in the Alpha Chi Omega sorority -- and as a function of this wound up in good graces with 70 women who lived in that house.  

One night, as I was sneaking out, I bumped into a buddy of mine who was also sneaking out.

We turned EVERYTHIGN in their house upside down.

Tables.

Paintings.  

Couches.

Etc.

Quoted: Quoted: I know someone who knows someone who ..... knew a mental midget that was deserving someone's wrath. His pickup was his pride and joy. A local sporting goods store used to sell skunk cover scent. In case anyone cares to know, you can use a syringe and needle to squirt said liquid between the sections of the sliding back glass. 3-foot long piece of plastic tubing can extend the reach of a can of "GreatStuff" expanding insulating foam enough that you can empty the contents into a muffler. Knowing the kind of vehicle before the attack, go to a store and buy enough key blanks for every door. Using a Dremel moto-tool, grind a fishhook notch into one side. THEN grind the handle part of the key so it will snap off under pressure. Insert said keys into both door locks. For the icing on the cake, a time delay. Cut the gas cap strap and take his gas cap. Replace his gas cap with a locking cap. Keep the key. So first the guy needs a lock smith to open the truck. THEN the guy spends hours cleaning the skunk smell. THEN the truck won't run when he tries to start it. A few days later he is stranded at the service station because he doesn't have enough gas to get home, and he can't get the gas cap off. you win the prize for the best diobolical plan.

Plan?  It was actually done, and worked perfectly.  

I'm not sure what the statute of limitations is, so I
really need to be careful what I say.

The BEST part was, the guy lives 200 miles away.
He was sure he knew who did it, and he told the police.
The police called and asked if I ...  umm... I mean the suspect
would come in for questioning.  Since the suspect was outside
of the jurisdiction, I never made it to the appointment.  

The thing was, when he discovered the gas cap, he made
another call to the police.  Remember, the gas cap wasn't
discovered for a few days.  But he told the police the suspect
must have struck again the night before he discovered it.
Only the suspect had a rock solid alaby for that night.
Police dropped it.

To top it off, since the suspect had an alaby, the truck owning asshole
ended up blaming his own son, and kicked him out of the house.  
They had been fighting prior to this, but he never suspected the son.
The son had nothing to do with it.  
The son was an ass too, so the real suspect got two for the price of one.

Dave

We used to have a lot of fun with stink bombs when I was in high school.  We would clear the halls after lunch with them every day.  There was one guy we called Dirt.  I could easily write a book about the stupid shit he's done and is still doing.  Me and him went to a movie one night, when it was over he dropped a stink bomb on the floor.  We were the first ones out and made sure to leave right away so we wouldnt get caught.  I went straight home and turned on my police scanner like I usually did.  I heard on it that an ambulance was needed at the theater because someone was having diffuculty breathing.  That was the last time I had anything to do with stink bombs.  I still feel really bad about that.

Here's another one involving Dirt.  Me and two other friends were bored one halloween night.  We took an old snowmobile suit and stuffed it with old clothes and put a clown mask on it for a head.  We planned on doing something evil with it, but ended up just driving around.  Matt was the one who supplied the clown mask ended up keeping the dummy, we nicknamed it Bernie the Clown.  Matt kept it in the front seat of his car and would drive around with it everywhere, he even made his girlfriend ride in the back seat when Bernie was with.  

Dirt hated Bernie, we would throw it on top of him, he was so scrawny that he had a hard time getting out from under it.  We'd put it in his car and he'd get pissed and drag it out and kick the shit out of it in the street.  One day we were sitting around Matt's house and he came up with a great idea.  We took all the stuffing out of Bernie and Matt put on the suit and mask and layed down in the back of my truck.  We drove over to the pizza place Dirt was working.  I made sure to park in front of the big window in front of the building so Dirt would see us.  Chad and I got out of the truck and went around back and grabbed "Bernie" by the arms and dragged him over to Dirt's car and propped him up behind the wheel.  We saw Dirt making his way for the door so we ran for my truck and took off to the parking lot across the street to watch.  Dirt came out the door, saw us and yelled "very funny guys", he opened he car door and reached and grabbed Bernie and said "come on Bernie"  and started to pull him out.  As soon and Dirt touched him Matt yelled and put his hands around Dirt's neck.  Dirt screamed like a girl and jumped back so fast that he hit his head on the roof and door frame that he almost knocked himself out.

beer cans & fishing line tied to the bumper or better yet frame under truck.   Makes a bunch of noise.   Non damaging.  

Shave an eyebrow off of passed out person.
Take green marks-a-lot marker and color passed out drunk like little sprout.  
Talcum powder under door and then take blow dryer and blow it under the door into dorm room.
Cold pitcher of water over the top of the shower.  
Waterballon topless sunbathing soriety girls next door.   Works best with surgical tubing launcher and spotter with video camera and walkie talkies.

This brings back some good memories.   thanks guys.

In basic training me and another genius decided to switch all the uniforms hanging on the ends of the bunks in the middle of the night. Our plan was foolproof until we mustered out in the morning. After the DI thought he was going nuts because name tags didn't match faces, he realized only myself and the other guy had our own uniforms on.   That one cost us a lot of "remedial training"

We were 16 and going Mailbox bashing. Using a one inch solid steel bar everything we nailed just crumbled. Then we came to a mailbox that was made from a old metal milk jug. The big ones that held like 5 gallons. My friend hurt his hand and we took it personnel. After many tries of banging we decided to blow it up. Fast forwrd 3 months and 4 tries. Finally fed up we ended up making the mother of allpipe bombs. More than a pound of Pyrodex in this thing and a 2 foot chunck of cannon fuse. We were 1/4 mile away when this thing went off huge fireball and a solid deep thunk sound. We could tell right away that it was a good one because of the sound "lot of practice by then" six hours later we did a drive by th take a look, go around the corner and the whole Barry county police force is armed to the teeth  waiting on us. Class D    felony dropped to destruction of property. 40 hours community service fine and 6 months probation that was shortened to 3 for good behavior.

Variation on an earlier post. I haven't actually tried this but I have it on good authority that it works well (if your goal is getting someone seriously PO'd).

Deposit a large amount of baby powder into a friend's car's defroster vents, wipe up any residue, and leave the fan switch on high for when they start it. here

get some of the long zip ties like 18 inches and put one around some ones driveshaft. when they start moving it will slap around under the car and make a tick sound that stops when they do. at highway speeds its it a really loud buzz

Attach a car horn to a spring loaded clamp and connect a trailer plug to it with the brake light wire hooked to the horn.  Place somewhere under the back of truck and plug into trailer harness.

Quoted: Variation on an earlier post. I haven't actually tried this but I have it on good authority that it works well (if your goal is getting someone seriously PO'd). Deposit a large amount of baby powder into a friend's car's defroster vents, wipe up any residue, and leave the fan switch on high for when they start it. P.S. Don't expect your former friend to let you anywhere near the vehicle again.

Wont work in a lot of newer cars.  I have microfilters in both of my cars.  Youll clog the filter but none will get in.  

Too many to post, it's a wonder I'm not in jail.

Me and my brother turned a mule loose in the hallway in high school. It was pretty tame and just wandered around looking in the classrooms. Was suspected but never caught.

Me and 2 other guys in my platoon got the ugliest hooker we could find and paid her to hang out in the straight laced squad leaders barracks room. He screamed like a little bitch when he turned the light on and that ugly fucker was waiting on him on his bunk. Again suspected.

In the desert during Gulf 1, a few of us found the casings to a cluster bomb unit. It was pretty fucked up cosmetic wise, but we put the sections in the back of a Humvee for later amusement. We fixed it up as best as we could and put it in the 1st Sergeants bunk when we got back to KKMC. The scream was stupendous. The CO was pretty amused but had to make a speech about to the company. It was more directed at our platoon, and I think my squad. Suspected, but not caught.

While working at Barrett we had a UPS driver that was a real jerk. He was always talking shit, the guy that was working with me in the assembly dep't was getting hassled by the UPS driver. We were really in a hurry to get some contract guns done and didn't have time to mess with him. We told him so, and the co-worker said we didn't have the time, so we would make up for it tomorrow and just shoot him.
Fast forward to the next day. Me and the other guy pulled the bullet from a .50 rd and dumped all the powder. We spent an hour or so shredding a few squares of toilet paper into tiny bits. We packed the confetti into the primed case and put the case intot the chamber of a bolt gun. Cocked the rifle and put on safe.
The UPS driver gets there about quitting time and just jumps down out of the truck onto the little drop down step on the back of the truck. He says "I thought you guys were gonna shoot me today" Coworker says "That's right I forgot." He picks up the rifle, knocks it off safe and fires it. The sound of a .50 primer is damn loud. All this confetti flies out of the barrel. The driver screams, falls back into the truck and immediately sits back up with this look of shear terror on his face. He is looking down at his chest and his hands are going all over his body looking for this huge hole and blood. We were laughing so hard it hurt. It hurt badly.

We didn't get any delivery or pick up from UPS for a month. The shipping and recieving guy had to go to the local station to pick everthing up and drop everything off that was shipped out.
The other drivers heard about it and still talk about it 5 years later.

Quoted: Attach a car horn to a spring loaded clamp and connect a trailer plug to it with the brake light wire hooked to the horn.  Place somewhere under the back of truck and plug into trailer harness.

HAHA I'm going to have to try that sometime. I could just imagine my friend's wife driving around his 4Runner with that thing attached and honking all the time. She'd never figure it out.

Quoted: Chaos ensued.

That's even meaner than the time you tormented that unfortunate security guard by trying to bring fire onto an aircraft.  You are a mean person.  Meanie.

A quart of dishwashing soap in a mall fountain makes for all kinds of sudsy fun on a busy weekend

My biology teacher kept a pet boa constricter as a pet in the class room, it got loose a couple of times. Well my physics teacher is scared of snakes, the last time the snake got loose she was all freaked about it and was helping to find it.  While she was gone, we got some rubber hoses for prodjects together and placed them on the door.  When she came back to class, that hose fell on her, thought we was going to have to pull her off of the ceiling.  After the snake was found, he had to remove,  I guess 3 strikes your out rule was ineffect for the pet.

Quoted: While working at Barrett we had a UPS driver that was a real jerk. He was always talking shit, the guy that was working with me in the assembly dep't was getting hassled by the UPS driver. We were really in a hurry to get some contract guns done and didn't have time to mess with him. We told him so, and the co-worker said we didn't have the time, so we would make up for it tomorrow and just shoot him. Fast forward to the next day. Me and the other guy pulled the bullet from a .50 rd and dumped all the powder. We spent an hour or so shredding a few squares of toilet paper into tiny bits. We packed the confetti into the primed case and put the case intot the chamber of a bolt gun. Cocked the rifle and put on safe. The UPS driver gets there about quitting time and just jumps down out of the truck onto the little drop down step on the back of the truck. He says "I thought you guys were gonna shoot me today" Coworker says "That's right I forgot." He picks up the rifle, knocks it off safe and fires it. The sound of a .50 primer is damn loud. All this confetti flies out of the barrel. The driver screams, falls back into the truck and immediately sits back up with this look of shear terror on his face. He is looking down at his chest and his hands are going all over his body looking for this huge hole and blood. We were laughing so hard it hurt. It hurt badly. We didn't get any delivery or pick up from UPS for a month. The shipping and recieving guy had to go to the local station to pick everthing up and drop everything off that was shipped out. The other drivers heard about it and still talk about it 5 years later.

holy shit, that was the funniest thing i have ever herd. thanks for the good laugh.

tagged

When working for the Navy, we had a co-worker that was just too easy a target for practicals.

Hung a 1 liter IV bag in the ceiling over his bunk - led the drip tubing down through a small hole in the ceiling tile, with a small plug in the end. the plug went (via the "t" rails) to the steam line by my bunk. When I went to bed, I'd pull out the plug.

First one misfired - stained the tile but missed the mark. Second time I pulled the plug about an hour before I went to bed. Came in to the bunkroom and heard SPLOOSH.... SPLOOSH.... SPLOOSH. Almost felt sorry and went to wake him up - realized he'd moved his bed to get out of the drip. It had worked like a charm.

In the morning, he talked to our Captain, and said he "thought we might be fucking with him". The cap suggested that when PWC installed the new radiator behind his bunk, they might have cracked a pipe joint, and he should call PWC. We tried to flag him off, but he didn;t get it in time. When he found out later, he told us "You guys should tell me when you're pranking him!" We told him it was more important for him to maintain plausible deniability.


A few months later, we're changing out old & broken ceiling tiles. I enter the bunkroom and nearly get decapitated with a 2' x 3' chunk of fiberboard thrown at me "frisbee" style, followed by I"'M GONNA KILL YOU YOU SONOVABITCH!"


Forgot to dispose of the evidence, and the mark found it... ooops!


Second one was at the City. Had a Fire Chief who always used to bum smokes. To be fair, when he had 'em, he'd share, but it became his trademark  "hey... you gotta smoke?"

One of the guys got a little cheesed at him bumming all the time. So, having recently been to Reeves Boomland, and having procured a pack of ladyfingers, I "rigged" a kool for my buddy. I marked it somehow, and told him about it. He was going to light it, and 'take the hit', then tell the Chief to 'be careful', just to watch him cringe every time he had to bum. Unfortunately, he forgot which one was the rigged one by that time, and gave the Chief the loaded one by mistake...



BAM!


A minute later, you see the Chief go stompin' through the station towards his office "Goddam practical jokes... just one goddam time..."


Of course, someone outside the loop offered the advice to the Chief that smoking was bad for his health at that moment... he choose poorly.

That reminded me. Living in smalltown in fla, we had city trash pick up every friday AM. This was back in the mid 70's. Everyone had metal trash cans at the end of their driveway by late thursday eve. Myself and Jeff B would go down the road about 1-2am and tie fishing line between the trash cans across the road and wait for a car to come through.

this thread will deffinitely brighten a persons day. lol

I know people who...

Kicked bowling balls out of the bed up a pick up while driving up the Harbor Bridge in C.C. TX. They were near the top.

Broke tooth pics off in the locks of the class room door everytime they had a test.

Jacked up the school brats car and left it on blocks, with the tires just a half-inch off the ground She reved the shit out of it, and we told her the tranny was blown. Her daddy called a tow truck, and the driver told them what was really wrong.

Stole a marks car, filled it with ice and beer, and left it on the Port A ferry. When the beer was gone of course.

Stole a marks car at a party and ran it off a parking garage.

Set a foot ball field on fire after that school had so rudely tried to burn the other schools bonfire.

Sent people home with bird shot in them when they tried to prematurely burn a bonfire.

Rigged diesel and kreosote bombs in the bonfire for who ever tried to climb up it to light  a bon fire.

Removed the u-bolts from the spring packs on a jeep so when the offending asshole drove off, he lost both axles, ruining his driveshafts, oil pan, transfer case tail shaft, and tranny mounts.

Set off coast guard spec orange smoke bombs in the school auditoritum.

Set on top of a dorm with a sling shot and a bag of pepper mints, and pelted campus transit buses. We made it a sport.
'                                ' with water ballons and targeted girls in white shirts. The guy down below with the camcorder is what got us busted.

Dumped  3 days fishing trip worth of fish bodies and guts in the car of a male teacher who made it a habbit to harrass female students. And we're talking king fish, amber jack, and shark.

Killed 3 hogs over 250# each and whiped garbage bags of guts and shit into someones yard at about 80mph. Stuff was hangin from the trees. It took 4 passes.

Quoted: We used to have a lot of fun with stink bombs when I was in high school.  We would clear the halls after lunch with them every day.  There was one guy we called Dirt.  I could easily write a book about the stupid shit he's done and is still doing.  Me and him went to a movie one night, when it was over he dropped a stink bomb on the floor.  We were the first ones out and made sure to leave right away so we wouldnt get caught.  I went straight home and turned on my police scanner like I usually did.  I heard on it that an ambulance was needed at the theater because someone was having diffuculty breathing.  That was the last time I had anything to do with stink bombs.  I still feel really bad about that. Here's another one involving Dirt.  Me and two other friends were bored one halloween night.  We took an old snowmobile suit and stuffed it with old clothes and put a clown mask on it for a head.  We planned on doing something evil with it, but ended up just driving around.  Matt was the one who supplied the clown mask ended up keeping the dummy, we nicknamed it Bernie the Clown.  Matt kept it in the front seat of his car and would drive around with it everywhere, he even made his girlfriend ride in the back seat when Bernie was with.   Dirt hated Bernie, we would throw it on top of him, he was so scrawny that he had a hard time getting out from under it.  We'd put it in his car and he'd get pissed and drag it out and kick the shit out of it in the street.  One day we were sitting around Matt's house and he came up with a great idea.  We took all the stuffing out of Bernie and Matt put on the suit and mask and layed down in the back of my truck.  We drove over to the pizza place Dirt was working.  I made sure to park in front of the big window in front of the building so Dirt would see us.  Chad and I got out of the truck and went around back and grabbed "Bernie" by the arms and dragged him over to Dirt's car and propped him up behind the wheel.  We saw Dirt making his way for the door so we ran for my truck and took off to the parking lot across the street to watch.  Dirt came out the door, saw us and yelled "very funny guys", he opened he car door and reached and grabbed Bernie and said "come on Bernie"  and started to pull him out.  As soon and Dirt touched him Matt yelled and put his hands around Dirt's neck.  Dirt screamed like a girl and jumped back so fast that he hit his head on the roof and door frame that he almost knocked himself out.

A friend was taking a seminar class that lasted all day and let out for lunch. Everyone had their coats piled on 2 chairs near the door. I got a condom from the nurses office opened it and unrolled it and took some of the antibacterial ointment packs they left ou in the 1st aid station and squirted a couple packets in.

Went to the class and placed it on his coat so that when the coat on top of his was taken it would "fall out" of the pocket and out into the open. When the OP started it was all I could do to not laugh as the woman, in her 30s picked up his coat while he was waiting for his. The rubber fell out onto the floor, with visible imitation jizz present. They both looked at it, at each other then back to the rubber as more people started to notice and point. The women was discusted at what she thought was some degenerate, sicko. Well, she was right....  All he could blubber was "It, it, it isn't MINE! I SWEAR! He turned beat red and was stammering when he heard my laughter outside the room. He knew who it was and took off after me. He chased me down 6 flights of stairs before I had to stop, I had run out of breath from laughing and was starting to hyper-ventilate. He was pissed but started laughing too as it was rare for someone to pull one over on him.

S.O.

In a massive snow storm we were throwing snowballs at cars. Didn't see what kind of car it was and my buddy let a very hard packed snowball fly right into the side window of a cop car. Within 10min there were 3 cops crusing the neighborhood. Never got caught though.

Our senior prank we took a calf from the local farm and got it ontop of the school roof. The school went crazy trying to find out who did it but the three of us kept quiet and got away with it.

In my frat at college we took a passed out pledge and stuffed the top half of a condom up his ass using a pencil, my buddy took lotion and greased up his butt and left his pants down. When the kid woke up it took him almost a full 15min. to figure it out. He freeked the fuck out and threatened to kick everyones ass that was within two floors. He told us later that he realy didn't know if he had been violated or not for a few days. His plede nickname was rubber-bum after that incident.

We would take duct tape and place it sticky side up across the road, when cars came by it would get all wraped up and they would stop. After doing this half a dozen times we got bored and hijacked a few woden garden stakes and attached them to both sides of the duct tape...... Our first victim was a big pickup truck, it picked up the tape and the rods just beat the shit out of the side of that truck..... The guy chased us all over the neighborhood but lost the race and we got away

This shit is too damn funny.  I really need to start on my friggin' paper and these posts aren't helping.