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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:13:23 PM EDT
[#1]
Quoted: What is the funniest thing you've ever done to a co worker? I work in an autoparts store, and I have to dispatch (babysit) 9 delivery drivers. I caught one of them making stops that he shouldn't have been making. My boss, him, and I all had a nice chat about it, and this particular driver has been extremely cold about the subject. He has been a TOTAL jerk for the last two weeks so I just HAD to do something to him. I couldn't think of anything that wouldn't get me fired, until I was unloading a truck with the forklift....I picked up the rear end of the angry drivers delivery truck up just about an inch with the fork lift, and just left the fork parked there. He didn't think anything of the fork lift being there, loaded his truck full of parts, and tried to leave the parking lot. The look on his face was PRICELESS when he jammed the truck into gear and couldn't go anywhere. Anyone got any stories that will lead to more pranks at work? One time I took all of his tools out of his toolbox, I screwed his toolbox to the worktable then put all his tools back. Our shop was the size of an airplane hanger. So can you imagine the look on his face when all his office furniture was hanging from the ceiling. too tired to think of more. Ooooh there was this one pompous ass that worked for us that drove a trans am... he loved that car and he is one of those that likes to keep his window rolled down an inch so the heat doesnt build up. We filled that fucker with those styrofoam peanuts... Man he was pissed. |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:18:33 PM EDT
[#2]
I once filled a coworkers car with garbage once, but got in alittle bit of trouble because I was going into his "private property" to screw with him. I need to have a local radio station "dirty friday" this guys ass.
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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:30:49 PM EDT
[#3]
This one is harmless.
Take someones banana from their lunch. Poke a sewing needle through the skin and work it back and forth. When the banana is peeled, it falls in half with a nice, neat cut. Let them try and figure that one out. [:D] |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:34:32 PM EDT
[#4]
My boss always backed into his parking spot so it was easy to put a homemade bumper sticker on his car that said "honk if your gay".
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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:40:38 PM EDT
[#5]
almost to me:
This summer our heavy equipment mechanic got stuck at the local airstrip when he spotted my truck. He was going to take the drive line out and put it in the back of my truck. He could not find any wrenches in the pilot's shack.... That would have been fun. Tightening up u-joints finger tight till I made it to a gas station. |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 10:42:34 PM EDT
[#6]
heh! bumper stickers.
While on the boat, putting Navy recruiting bumper stickers on an anti-navy rebel's car. |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 11:17:35 PM EDT
[#7]
My same friend, Jeremy, who pulled the alligator valve prank (see Tracer Paint thread) works in a kitchen at a bar. One day he saw the new guy slacking.
"Hey, Wade, I need you to go into the fridge and grab me can of bearded clams for a soup I'm making!!" About 5 minutes later: "I found this can of clams, but no bearded clams." |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 11:29:56 PM EDT
[#8]
Training a new guy, he's driving.
We get into a high speed pursuit, that leads to a crash, and the driver and passenger of that vehicle running on foot. I'm able to get out, catch up to, and tackle the suspect driver. As I am getting ready to handcuff him, my trainee comes running up. I say, didn't you hear what I said before I got out of the car? T: Huh, what, looking around. I said I'll get the driver, you get the passenger. I've got the driver, where is the passenger? T: Looking around more rapidly, I, err, but, hmmm, I don't know where he is. I didn't hear you say anything before you got out of the car. Look of fear starting over his face. I said I'll get the driver you get the passenger, just before I bailed. T: Starting to hyperventilate..........I DIDNT HEAR THAT. That's good 'cause I didn't say it............Why do we need the passenger? The driver is the guy that was causing the problems............. |
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Posted: 11/28/2003 11:43:50 PM EDT
[#9]
Fireman Abacan liked to fish off the fantail of the frigate we were stationed on whenever we had steel-beach sundays, and one particular day he fell asleep with his line paying out behind the ship. One of the engineers noticed and ran down to the metal shop and found a 40 lb. brass valve, which we secured to the end of his line and let drop in the sea until about 75% of his line was in the water.
Then we started yelling "You got a fish! Abacan, you got a huge one!" to wake the poor bastard up, and by this time the whole ship, including the captain, knew what was going on... I've never seen that many people on the ass end of a ship at one time before, and all of them cheering him on as he sweated and strained to reel this monster 'fish' to the surface. I think it took him almost an hour to reel that thing in, and he was beaming imagining what kind of fish it was... till he saw it. Half the crew was in tears laughing when they gaffed that valve. He was a good sport about it, and the CO let us polish the valve and put it on a plaque, commemorating the date and time of the first capture of the elusive north atlantic valve fish. |
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Posted: 11/29/2003 12:06:03 AM EDT
[#10]
OC spray on the toilet seat. OC spray on food. OC spray on doorknobs.
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Posted: 11/29/2003 12:24:13 AM EDT
[#11]
Turned a coworker's toolbox around and screwed all the drawers shut, then put it back. Glued his cowboy boots to the 20' ceiling, wrote "LOOK " on a mirror and set it on his box. You could see the boots it the mirror. Large tie wraps around the driveshaft on his truck. Grease under the door handles. Bumper stickers that said "gay and proud" and "I love latex".
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Posted: 11/29/2003 1:56:40 AM EDT
[#12]
The old envelopes of mustard and ketchup under the toilet seat trick. (folded in half, under the pads)
Got the cranky geezer...mustard up one leg, ketchup down the other, man was he fumin'! We can't do much of anything anymore...the paranoid types rule. Even if they get a flat on the highway, "it had to happen at work". (And try to get the company to pay for new tires!) ANYTHING that happens, real or imagined, they not only blame someone, they take it out on him. Not a good environment for (my famous) pranks. [8)] |
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Posted: 12/6/2003 10:52:21 PM EDT
[#13]
Had an Assclown at work steal my custom license plate off my '76 VW after I "walk in front of his forklift and got in his way". We were having construction in the plant and were using porta-potties instead of bathrooms. Waited until he went for his morning 1/2-hourly, had a friend help shrink wrap the whole thing so he couldn't get the door open. Then used a big pry-bar to tip it over.
Dave |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 12:08:32 AM EDT
[#14]
Back when we had armed security guards. I went into the restroom of our lobby and foun one of the guards in the shitter. He had draped his belt with gun over the door. I went back out, called the Lobby Guard over and while he was watching (didn't want this to get too far out of hand and of course needed a witness) grabbed the gunbelt and pulled it out of the stall. We ran out into the lobby and waited for him.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 12:19:06 AM EDT
[#15]
Lately I've been greasing the earpiece on the phones in the office and then going back out into the shop and calling the number on the phone in the break room. So far it's worked every time cause I'm using Crisco and it's damned hard to see. I won't be owning up to it, I've gotten just about everyone in management and now their on a witch hunt for "that goddamned greasy sonnuvabitch".
[}:D] |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 1:47:36 AM EDT
[#16]
I used to work in tech support and we had quite a bit of fun with each others computers
Changing the axis of the mouse-moving it left makes it go up, right/down, up and down makes it go left and right. Saving the desktop image as a bitmap and then making that the desktop-ya can't click on a thing! Loaded a computer with a Chinese version of Windows 2000-that was great fun. Tape on the bottom of the mouse ball Changing the display to the black and white high contrast magnify everything 500% Change the display so everything is upside down Set homepages to the worst porno sites Change the startup sound to increase the volume to full and play "hey I'm looking at porn over here!" |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:33:04 AM EDT
[#17]
When I worked in the engineering dept. at the hospital, everyone had a pair of rubber boots we wore when there was a flood. I took a bunch of those mustard packs and cut the corner off of them and put them in one of the supervisors boots. The next he put them on he had mustard all over his sock. Also put Never Seize on the doorknobs and phone receivers.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:51:40 AM EDT
[#18]
I used to work at a place where this was taken to an art form. We took an old pair of boots and an old pair of pants into a stall, made it look like someone was in there taking a shit, and locked the door. Some do gooder kicked the door in trying to help the poor guy out. I had some guy screw with me several times, so I took some graphite, the kind you use on locks. I put some in his pants, and shook them up. Some in his shirt. In his gloves, in the hatband of his hardhat, and in his boots. The stuff is so slick, he could hardly walk, and by the end of the day he was completely gray. All he could say was, you motherfucker. I'm going to get you motherfucker. He never did.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:59:15 AM EDT
[#19]
Friend's shopmate was too cheap to put his change in the donut cup, and always took the same flavor jelly fill. So he took out most of the jelly with a straw, filled with axle grease, then blew out the straw to patch the fill hole. Told the rest of the employees to leave the jelly one for him, and enjoyed the show.
Also used gloves to juice a habanero into the bosses coffee. Second sip did not make things better :) |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 6:07:04 AM EDT
[#20]
Had a co-worker who was deathly afraid of snakes and a very self rightous SOB know it all to boot. Mangaged to get the keys to his van early one morning before he showed up at the garage and placed a coiled rubber snake on the passenger seat covered with yesterdays newspaper ran a piece of nylon fishing line to the drivers side arm rest from the snake. Later on when the shop cleared out and he goes to his van a bunch of us hang back and watch the fun. As he opens the van door and the snake come hurtling at him he jumped it seemed like 10 feet in te air and back then scrambled backward on his butt for about another 10 feet then got up and ran across the parking lot at a full sprint. He goes and gets the fleet manager complaining about 'wiseass mechanics' and 'heart attacks' before he notices us all rolling on the ground laughing ourselves silly.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 9:33:35 AM EDT
[#21]
hahahahahahahahahaahaha I'm liking the ketchup/mustard packs under the toilet seat...one of the drivers spends ALOT of time in the bathroom, and we think its not on the seat (puttin somethin up her nose). This could be a good way to find out...LOL hey maybe I'll try it with those little honey packets from KFC........
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Posted: 12/7/2003 11:18:50 AM EDT
[#22]
20 years ago,
New guy welding at the station across from me. I filled a sandwich bag with oxy/acet mix, tied it off and let it drift next to his feet. Welding sparks drop, well you get the pic. It was f****** hilarious. No secret, even the boss knew I did it, but never said a negative word about it. |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 11:37:37 AM EDT
[#23]
Quoted: Saving the desktop image as a bitmap and then making that the desktop-ya can't click on a thing! Tape on the bottom of the mouse ball Change the display so everything is upside down Change the startup sound to increase the volume to full and play "hey I'm looking at porn over here!" We pulled the exact same ones on a good friend of mine who was our IT guy in our office. Another good story-- A girl in our office who was wasn't having much luck in finding a date had prank pulled on her by coworkers. One of her friends bought a full size blow up doll and dressed him in a real tuxedo and put him in her office when she came in. We could hear her scream way down the hall. We had great laughs over that one, but then we got the bright idea to take the doll and put it in the IT guy's office. We couldn't get him to stand up so we decided to hang him from the ceiling tile with a printer cable around his neck with his back facing the IT guy's desk. The next morning when he came in we all waited in the next door office. He walked in his office and didn't look up until he logged onto his computer. That took about 40 seconds. Then all of the sudden he screamed and threw his chair back into the wall, knocking stuff off the walls. I really felt bad, because he truly thought for a brief moment that someone had hung themself in his office. He said he thought his heart stopped; I thought I was going to have to go home and change my pants. |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 11:50:32 AM EDT
[#24]
1) Black phone recivers ear peace dabbed on a ink pad. = A case of black ear
2) Spray Hawkeye on toilet seat. = Hairs stuck to seat 3) Fart capsule (from joke shop) taped on pad under toilet seat. = real bad smell while trying to do your business 4) Fill condom with water, tape small hose on the opening, place in center desk drawer, close to pinch hose closed and cut flush. = wet shirt and pants |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 12:19:59 PM EDT
[#25]
We floated an Oxy/Acetelene Bag up under a gantry crane with a piece of burning oiled string tied to it.
He was up there sleeping on his cot waiting for the production line to start up again when it went off. I've never heard such a loud boom in my life. It blew him off his cot and he pissed his pants. He was MAD. I have felt bad about that for a long time cause I'm scared we hurt his hearing. We also used to get shot by our boss with a water hose, He'd catch you as you were walking under these catwalks. One time he DOUSED me when I got cornered. I went out to the end of the rolling mills where we had a high pressure water gun used to douse fires from hot ingots. He and another buddy of ours drove this old ford ranger past it with no doors on it. He came around the corner and was about 5 feet away when I hit him with that high pressure stream. It blew both he and hammer out the drivers side door and the truck crashed into the rolling mills. They looked like two drowned rats after that. That was awesome.... |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 12:31:21 PM EDT
[#26]
American industry at work.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 2:09:35 PM EDT
[#27]
Quoted: 20 years ago, New guy welding at the station across from me. I filled a sandwich bag with oxy/acet mix, tied it off and let it drift next to his feet. Welding sparks drop, well you get the pic. It was f****** hilarious. No secret, even the boss knew I did it, but never said a negative word about it. This is funny, but I really dislike pranks while I'm welding due to a bad experience... In H.S. welding class, I was a computer nerd, who also liked welding (it was interesting, and different; One of the few mechanical things I could do well). So the local redneck boys would always try to pull pranks on me while I was welding. Once while welding a kid snuck up behind me (I was sitting on a stool welding something on a bench), and used a brazing rod to snag a corner of what I was welding. Since I was wearing a mask, I couldn't see the brazing rod in my peripheral vision, it was too dark... Well, he decided it would be funny to FLIP the red-hot metal onto my lap!!! Mother fucker was laughing his ass off & it burned through the protective apron, and through my jeans, and into my thigh. Luckilly there's no scar. Then the previous idiot's best redneck friend decided to sneak up behind me while I was welding, and he thought it would be "funny" to flip up the protective lense on my arc welding mask... The bright flash permanently screwed up my vision in my right eye, I had a headache for 3 days, and was seeing spots for over a week & a half!!! HA HA! FUNNY!!! REALLY FUNNY!!! FUCKING REDNECK! Last I saw both of them were arrested & serving a few years for drug dealing. |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 2:17:25 PM EDT
[#28]
[/quote] HA HA! FUNNY!!! REALLY FUNNY!!! FUCKING REDNECK! Last I saw both of them were arrested & serving a few years for drug dealing.[/quote] Sounds like some great people! Just think of it this way, what they did to you is probably NOTHING compared to what its like in prison...If you ever see them again ask if they're a pillow biter or not. hehehe...Club Fed....must suck.... |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 2:20:24 PM EDT
[#29]
I'm gonna have to try the tape on the mouseball thing... We normally tape the little phone thing down so when they pick up the phone its still ringing, or we zip tie the phone cord together so when they pick it up the whole thing is still RIGHT THERE at the phone base....Hmm....this is going to be fun...
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Posted: 12/7/2003 3:35:11 PM EDT
[#30]
A few years back a coworker jumped into the back of an empty company triaxle dump truck to take a shit (we were working in a public area with no restrooms). Knowing he was back there, I counted to 30 and jumped into the drivers seat, released the air brake and yelled "OH SHIT!" which made him panic. I started rolling down the hill in neutral. After about 100 yards or so I slammed the brakes on, sending my coworker somersaulting to the other side of the dump truck - pants around his ankles.
I bought him dinner to apologize. |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:02:08 PM EDT
[#31]
Took the powder out of a M-80 fircracker and put the fuse back in. We lit the fuse and tossed it over the top of a stall that was in use. Door came flying open with a co-worker coming out running, rolling and tumbling with his pants around his ankles and the dud M-80 stuck in his pants still smoking. Still brings a chuckle 25 years later.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:22:39 PM EDT
[#32]
The tool room I worked at years ago we were allowed to listen to a radio only on the weekend. A co-worker which wouldn't hurt anyone always liked to listen to DoWop style music. I set him up good. For a month I said "You keep playing that music I'm gonna cut the cord" I just so happened to have the same style cord at home in my junk drawer. I removed his cord one Saturday morning and placed mine that was all cut up. I can only tell you I wish a camera was rolling. The guy was short of murdering somebody.
Rick |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 5:39:57 PM EDT
[#33]
disassembled the handset of my buddys phone and filled the inside with limburger cheese. gave off a wonderful "foot and ass" aroma which lasted for months.
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Posted: 12/7/2003 9:14:18 PM EDT
[#34]
I work for an airline and one time we were fixing something in the aft lav. I told the captain and gate agent we were all done, and they pushed back. Well, I guess my buddy (who was still in the lav) didnt notice right away and it was too late to turn around and come back to the gate by the time he popped out of the lav. So he enjoyed a nice flight to Tucson and back!!!!! It was pretty funny. This was a prank that wasnt supposed to happen....
Rob |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 9:37:18 PM EDT
[#35]
I brought a bag of cheese curds to work after deer hunting back in Wisconsin.
Strted passing them around at break time and then told them they were salted deer brains, from Wisconsin. After the first guy would belive me the rest were no problem. |
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Posted: 12/7/2003 9:55:49 PM EDT
[#36]
Something you have to watch out for if you ever worked at a carwash. This one had the high pressure sprayers for the wheels and hard dirt and it just so happened that a 20 ounce coke bottle fits snug over them. Pretty accurate too. So, buddy of mine just finished vacuuming the car, gets out and walks towards the line. I jump out from behind a wall with my new assualt water gun and nail him square in his chest. He falls back into a pile of mud and water. Not to mention he was soaking wet from the spray already.
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Posted: 12/8/2003 4:44:49 AM EDT
[#37]
Funniest thing I did to this punjabi fellow was I had him call up Mayor Koch of NYC and ask him if he had any airconditioners for sale. It was a hot summer back in 1988 and this guy at my job kept asking me where he could buy an airconditioner "cheap". So I told him to call "Ed's Air-conditioners". I thought the mayors anwsering machine would come on, but low and behold, the Mayor anwsered it and my heart dropped to my bowels....so here's this Indian punjabi fellow asking the mayor for an airconditioner and bullshitting him on the phone not knowing it was the Mayor of NYC he was talking to, I ran out of the office laughing....next day the secret service called our job and the poor guy was scared shitless when he found out that it was the Mayor he was talking to, he couldn't sleep for a week fearing that the secret service would come and get him. So the bitch snitch ran to my boss and told him what I made him do. The boss called me into the office and had me explain the story to him....after I explained, my boss was laughing and said to me that was a good one and had me promise him never to call the mayor again from the office. Luckily my boss has a good sense of humor and I wasn't fired.
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Posted: 12/8/2003 5:03:47 AM EDT
[#38]
MANY years ago I was working on a late 70's Mercedes 4 door in my shop and the owner wanted a new pair of speakers mounted in the rear package tray.
One of the other guys in the shop was a big mouth smart-ass who knew everything (just ask him) and could always do it "better". He wanted to take a crack at the speaker install. He claimed he could do it fater than enyone else there. I told him ok. So he's in the trunk of the Benz with his makita drill/driver and he's running drywall screws up into the bottom of the package tray to fasten the speakers. I go to my bench and break the heads off a few 3/4" drywall screws. Then I put a little putty on the broken part of each screw. I stuck the screws to the inside of the cars package tray over where he was working so the threads and points made it look like the screws were sticking up out of the tray. I yelled at him to make sure the screws he was using weren't too long. He barked back with something about how he's expert at this and I should mind my own business. After he finishes, he gets out of the trunk, looks at the sharp ends of the screws sticking up out of the package tray inside the car and he procedes to have a fit about how screwed he is and how he'll have to order a replacement package tray... Everyone else in the shop was rolling on the floor lauging. It was a good day in the shop... [:D] |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 5:10:56 AM EDT
[#39]
2 weeks after a failed attempt to "hot wire" the seat of my old 78 LTD by my coworker friend, I returned the favor. LOL! watching his head hit the roof of his car when it started up was funny indeed. Vehicles are a real challenge to shut down when you're being jolted by electricity. I'm glad we don't hot wire seats anymore, it just hurts to much.
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Posted: 12/8/2003 5:31:17 AM EDT
[#40]
Quoted: I work in an autoparts store Ever load up a condenser(from an old points type distributor) and toss it to someone? The look of shock on their face is priceless![lol] For those of you that don't know how: Place the condensor on something metal (exhaust manifold) take a wire off of a spark plug, hold it near the wire coming out of the condensor, and have someone crank the motor. Watch the arcs hit the wire a few times. BE CAREFUL! You can pick it up, just don't touch the base and the end of the wire at the same time. When you do, it will dicharge, zapping you with an electrical shaock, that feels like a bee sting! |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 5:35:56 AM EDT
[#41]
Another time I took a black balloon, and put it under a co-workers brake pedal.
I thought he pissed himself, when he stepped in the brake and heard a big POP! |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 5:48:26 AM EDT
[#42]
Guy came to work wearing a pair of [b][red]RED[/b][/red] straw shoes. I paid him $100/shoe to get rid of them but he had to go barefoot (he was wearing a suit) the rest of the day. 5sub |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 6:32:05 AM EDT
[#43]
About 5 years ago we had a real dufuss working for us in the office.
A fellow co-worker and myself went out to our shop and got 2 pieces 6" pipe cut to a specified length. We placed these 2 lengths under this dufuss's truck's rear axle after quickly jacking the truck up. They raised the back end up about a 1/2" off the ground. It was hilarious, he could not figure out why his truck wouldn't back up when he went to leave . He even got out and made sure nothing was behind his tires keeping it from moving and then got back in and tried to back up again. I was literally crying it was so funny. He finally figured it all out after about 15 minutes and got pissed off. Ahh, it was so worth it though. Then we used to have a guy in here that would always poke a hole in peoples' pop cans just under the lip with a very tiny pin point. He got me about 3 times before I learned to check each time before taking a sip. |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 6:41:27 AM EDT
[#44]
I carved a male genital out of a broomstick and glued it to a co workers bumper once. Sticking straight out the back. He didn't see it for a couple of weeks. I almost got punched for that one.
At another job, we had a jackass who was always first in line to get out the door at quitting time. He would start his car and floor it across the parking lot. He took pride in being the first one out everyday. After almost running a couple of us over one day while on his mission, I came up with a plan that needed my supervisor's approval. I got it. After lunch, I snuck outside and glued a wooden block to the backside of his accelerator pedal. After work, when he made his mad dash for the car, we all stood there and watched. He always backed his car into the stall to help in his fast get out. He started his car, threw it into drive, and tried to floor it. You could see his face as he was getting madder and trying to stomp the pedal down. Meanwhile, a few of the other workers calmly walked to their cars and pulled out in front of him. He stopped and got out of his car swearing up a storm, took the block off his pedal and threw it at me and a couple other people standing there. He started threatening us for going into his car, blah, blah, blah...just then, our supervisor (who was watching the whole ordeal) stepped in and said he will not be allowed to back his car into the stalls (employee handbook had a rule about this) he will not exceed 5 mph in the parking lot, and he (employee) will not be filing a complaint against us, or he (our supervisor) himself will file a complaint against the employee for willfully throwing objects at us, and reckless driving in the parking lot. That was the last of the parking lot speeder. He quit a few months later. |
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Posted: 12/8/2003 8:24:01 AM EDT
[#45]
We had one joker who used to put aircraft grease on the inside of the crainial earpiece liner. When it was strapped down tight the grease would leak out and by the time you knew what had happened it was too late.
He did this to the entire shop before I caught him greasing up a couple of crainials again one afternoon. I told the guys in the shop what had happened and they came up with a plan to get back at him. They broke into his bks room and greased up his bed sheets with Moly-B, anti-sieze and aircraft grease. Then they took numbnuts out drinking and got him hammered and dropped him off at his room. The next day when he woke up he was covered with grease from head to toe. |
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