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Posted: 6/20/2003 4:36:52 PM EDT
Well I never thought I would wind up in this position but I am considering getting married and was wondering if any one out there has any advice on the process of buying a diamond for an engagment ring? I am thinking at least 1 Karat... I know that is a LOT of gun money she is worth it though. IPSC_GUY (putting off that new STI .40 for a WHILE)
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 4:43:00 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/20/2003 4:44:26 PM EDT by die-tryin]
IMO...do not spend a ton of money on an engagement ring...in this day and age , anything can happen..break-up (dont say it cant happen, cause it can), it could get stolen, lost etc..and if she NEEDS a bigass diamond to prove ya luv her,,time to tell er hit the bricks..on a good note,, get a cheap one now (real diamonds of course ) and later on ya can get a matching set of engagement ring and wedding ring,, in sum cases the woman only wear wedding rings and not the engagement ring..do what ya will,,i jus see it senseless to spend all that money on a rock,,ya atleast could save the money for when ya get married and need stuff then..same goes with overpriced weddings..total waste with the divorce rate in this country (once again, dont say it wont happen, the odds are 50/50 right now that it will)..jus my .02 (from experience, my wife agrees,,waste of money) *edit* been married 9 years so im not a bitter single person talkin here..lol
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 4:44:35 PM EDT
[:(] i just thought about the .50BMG i could have with the money spent on my wifes rock............
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 4:47:03 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/20/2003 4:50:59 PM EDT by SWIRE]
There was a thread about a month and a half ago that detailed almost everything. If you can find it I think it will provide you with all the information you are looking for. That said I agree with die-tryin. Don't spend a ton of money on it just to say you spend XXX dollars on it. You never know what will happen. BTW, I have an engagement ring for sale. The diamond is round, 5/8 carat, D color, VVS2 clarity, and GIA rated with laser inscribed serial number. Let me know if you are interested. Edited it add: I am a single guy but only slightly bitter. Now I'm stuck with a rock when instead of a .50 BMG.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 4:52:20 PM EDT
Here's the thread I was talking about [url]http://www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?b=1&f=5&t=186592&w=searchPop[/url]
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:01:42 PM EDT
i know most of what they were saying on that thread , but still good reading..it seems most agree with my statements and then the other aspect is when ya do get a ring,,look for all the things they discussed,, and there are so many diamond/jewelers out there, ya can get a hella good price ,maybe even on a big ring, OR depending on here taste,,i had an opal ring made for my wife that was using a really fancy old ring setting,,she liked that alot, it was expensive,,but it was the thought that i put the effort to make it very personalised and i know there isnt another one in the world.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:02:27 PM EDT
dont do it.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:04:48 PM EDT
As far as value I think traditionally its supposed to be two months pay.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:07:25 PM EDT
I have two words for you, never forget, always work under all circumstances: Cubic Zirconium
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:11:01 PM EDT
I spent $5500 on my wife's engagement ring back in 1986. The money had been earmarked as a down payment on a Porsche 928 until I met her. The diamond is a little over a carat, and very clear on the color and clarity scale. It was not what she was expecting, and made her feel like a million bucks. She still gets compliments on it from other women. It was the best money that I ever spent.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:26:20 PM EDT
Ask her family, maybe you can do what I did...I got her grandmother's engagement ring stone and had it reset into an engagement ring. Wound up giving her a .75 carat diamond for $145. Then, I got her grandmother's wedding ring and had it welded to the engagement ring as her wedding band (all with my wife's permission, of course). I'm not a tightwad, really, but that ring is one-of-a-kind and means the world to Mrs Limaxray, not only because it's HER ring but also because of the family heritage involved--and it saved me some cash to boot.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:31:24 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Bud: blah, blah Porsche 928 until I met her. blah, blah
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A porsche for a woman... I hope you are happy.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:33:37 PM EDT
don't do it all women are out to use and hurt you
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 5:38:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Bud: I spent $5500 on my wife's engagement ring back in 1986. The money had been earmarked as a down payment on a Porsche 928 until I met her. The diamond is a little over a carat, and very clear on the color and clarity scale. It was not what she was expecting, and made her feel like a million bucks. She still gets compliments on it from other women. It was the best money that I ever spent.
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I regret not spending more on my wifes ring. I went by the "three months salary" rule. At the time I wasn't making much and bought a ring for $2000. I was making about $600/month at the time. Buy her the ring that you KNOW she will treasure the rest of her life because you are going to make vows reflecting that premise. To hell with the people that are saying "go cheap" because you will never know what could happen. Thats a really negative way to look at what could be the most positive thing in your life... I say...start with a good attitude, intentions and a committment to yourself to work as hard as possible to make the relationship work.
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 6:06:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/20/2003 6:17:15 PM EDT by the1_roadrunner]
Originally Posted By Red_Beard: don't do it all women are out to use and hurt you
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Agreed, don't do it dude.... I'm 45, never married and happy as a lark. When I think back of all the girls I ALMOST married? I'm one thankful son of a bitch that luck was with me.... dude, don't do it!!!!! lets see...3 months salary = $20,000 ring...NOT!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 6/20/2003 6:42:42 PM EDT
Check out SWIRE's link. It has a lot of good info in it. My feeling about diamonds, is go for the cut which give the stone a brillance and fire , over carat, clarity, and color. My wife's diamond even hast flashes of light(known in the diamond trade as fire) when we are in darken movie theater. I've been married for 20 years.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 1:15:26 AM EDT
Yeah, cut is the most important aspect. Also, diamonds are priced in size groups. A .90 and .99 carat diamond will cost the same (wholesale, don't know what the retailer may do) and a one carat is a big jump in price. My tip is to look for a well cut .99 carat diamond. Try some of the independent jewelry maker/stores as opposed to the diamond mart types. Good luck. And one more tip. From a married man, never feel you have to get married. But if you are 100% sure, congrats. [:)]
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 2:02:12 AM EDT
I saw a Dr. Phil show about stuff like this. The only time he said it was ok to get a womenz a big diamond ring is after many years of non-divorce threatened marriage.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 2:55:28 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/21/2003 2:58:08 AM EDT by dnra]
Originally Posted By byron2112: As far as value I think traditionally its supposed to be two months pay.
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.....I WILL NEVER understand HOW some suckers get sucked into what other's think is the right traditional/thing [whacko] more than 50% of marriages FAIL and you'll lose your shirt if she plays her cards right.......they'er cheaper to rent and you dont get the same old stuff all the time!
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 3:02:22 AM EDT
Originally Posted By redray: dont do it.
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Ditto size does NOT matter[:O] What he said
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 4:08:16 AM EDT
Originally Posted By TexRdnec: [:(] i just thought about the .50BMG i could have with the money spent on my wifes rock............
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I could have had several M-16's when I bought my wifes rock, today I could have at least one.....
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 4:42:44 AM EDT
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 4:50:23 AM EDT
Originally Posted By IPSC_GUY: Well I never thought I would wind up in this position but I am considering getting married and was wondering if any one out there has any advice on the process of buying a diamond for an engagment ring? I am thinking at least 1 Karat... I know that is a LOT of gun money she is worth it though. IPSC_GUY (putting off that new STI .40 for a WHILE)
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True story... About eight years into our marriage, my wife tells me she would have been JUST as happy with a cubit zirc as the diamond I bought her. She claims its true. But then I'm married to an incredible woman. Lemme put it this way... If somewhere in the back of your mind you think paying BIG $$$ is gonna enhance the marriage in your fiances mind, then I would suggest re-thinking the "who" of this equation. On the other hand, if spending big bucks is simply a way of you telling her you love her, then go for it. HTH
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 4:58:01 AM EDT
Final thought - I cannot for teh LIFE of me imagine spending more than $2g. I spent $800 back in 1990. At the time, ot was my entire savings. And keep in mind, AFTER teh ring, the expense REALLY adds up. Furnitire alone will cost you BIG TIME. Best idea is prolly to get inside you womans head, and figger out if a stupid little rock is her priority, or furniture / house / stuff yer gonna HAVE to have is. Again, a "wrong" answer here may change the "who" of this equation. Not trying to be a downer here, but marriage is serious business. This from a VERY happily married man.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 5:14:28 AM EDT
i don't know what the hell i'd do with a ring..i don't wear any jewelry, never have... so i don't get what the huge deal is with women and their engagement rings...and truthfully, i feel for you men out there who have to deal with it...wish i could give you some advice on the topic, but alas, i seem to be missing that particular gene that makes a woman go out of her mind when it comes to this engagement ring crap... what would i want?? oh where to begin...how about a Kimber .45 ACP, or another tactical rifle...
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 5:25:00 AM EDT
Ratters offers a good compromise. I was "in the business", so to speak, a few years back. Diamonds with a carat weight of .96, .98 are known as "lightweight" 1 carats and are visually indistinguishable from a full 1 carat. As soon as the carat weight hits a full 1.00, the price increases dramatically. I would suggest Round Brilliant cut for diamonds. While not a particularly exotic cut, it seems to maximize the fire & opulence of the stone. Also, let your eyes be the judge. I got a good deal on my wife's stone because it had a fairly large inclusion in it, but man, it really blazed compared even to more expensive stones I viewed.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:41:57 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Lastbscout:
Originally Posted By Bud: I spent $5500 on my wife's engagement ring back in 1986. The money had been earmarked as a down payment on a Porsche 928 until I met her. The diamond is a little over a carat, and very clear on the color and clarity scale. It was not what she was expecting, and made her feel like a million bucks. She still gets compliments on it from other women. It was the best money that I ever spent.
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I regret not spending more on my wifes ring. I went by the "three months salary" rule. At the time I wasn't making much and bought a ring for $2000. I was making about $600/month at the time. Buy her the ring that you KNOW she will treasure the rest of her life because you are going to make vows reflecting that premise. To hell with the people that are saying "go cheap" because you will never know what could happen. Thats a really negative way to look at what could be the most positive thing in your life... I say...start with a good attitude, intentions and a committment to yourself to work as hard as possible to make the relationship work.
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[size=5]pussy whipped[/size=5]
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:45:03 AM EDT
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:47:22 AM EDT
If she wants a big rock, I have one word for you - Moissanite. Moissanite is more brilliant than a diamond and many diamond testing devices even say it's a diamond. It's about 1/10th the price.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:50:27 AM EDT
J/K... MarianLibrarian says, and she's right...it's not about the ring, and not about the wedding. If you have a woman who's impressed by the size of the rock and the size of the wedding, you're headed for trouble from the get-go. We got married on the beach at Grand Cayman. We were in swim gear two hours before the wedding...we went back to our room, cleaned up and got picked up and driven to the wedding site. It was beautiful, low-stress, and totally incomparable. It was about US, not about making the families/bridesmaids/aunts/friends/whosoeverthefuckelse happy or pissed off because they were/weren't in the wedding. We weren't trying to impress anyone, either my friends or hers. Tread lightly....don't get hypnotized by the pussy.....
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:52:45 AM EDT
Remmember, the jerks who came up with this "Two-months salary" bullshit are the ones trying to get their hands into YOUR POCKETS. DeBoers sells ALL diamonds imported into the United States, they have the market CORNERED so they can jack the prices up as far as they want. Ain't that a hoot? Funny how the Federal Trade Commission has a team dedictated to Bill Gates but they ignore DeBoers.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:53:34 AM EDT
Originally Posted By IPSC_GUY: Well I never thought I would wind up in this position but I am considering getting married and was wondering if any one out there has any advice on the process of buying a diamond for an engagment ring? I am thinking at least 1 Karat... I know that is a LOT of gun money she is worth it though. IPSC_GUY (putting off that new STI .40 for a WHILE)
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I hope you wake up tomorrow and realize you've just had a bad dream!! That said: diamonds are tacky. TT [coffee]
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 6:55:43 AM EDT
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 7:16:31 AM EDT
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 7:46:01 AM EDT
All I can say, is that I never knew what great sex was until I was married. Of course now it's too freaking late!!
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 10:36:58 AM EDT
Originally Posted By DoctorJess: i don't know what the hell i'd do with a ring..i don't wear any jewelry, never have... so i don't get what the huge deal is with women and their engagement rings...and truthfully, i feel for you men out there who have to deal with it...wish i could give you some advice on the topic, but alas, i seem to be missing that particular gene that makes a woman go out of her mind when it comes to this engagement ring crap... what would i want?? oh where to begin...how about a Kimber .45 ACP, or another tactical rifle...
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Women feel the same way about us and guns. That's how made my wife understand why I had so many and why I wanted more. Because she feels the same way about jewelry which is something I don't understand. So we just try to accept it in each other. [:)]
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 10:54:58 AM EDT
Originally Posted By TitaniumT: That said: diamonds are tacky. TT [coffee]
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Titanium(T) is a ClassAct! [8D] To respond to the OP, some 33 years ago I arranged thru a jeweler friend to bring my (now) Wife to a diamond merchant (referrals only, buzzed in, trays of bare stones, more trays of settings) in Boston. She picked the stone she liked (>1 ct), the setting, and the ring itself. It was a small fortune at the time, but worth ~3x more than we paid for it at retail. Both of us were college students at the time, and I've never regretted the expense in making her happy. I inherited my Grandmother's diamond (at age 18) and my Mother wanted me to make it into a tie-tack! I told her that I had no use for a ~1 ct diamond and told her to have it made into a ring for herself instead. I'm not into flashy jewelry, but my Wife does like jewelry (but has no interest in that which was my late Mother's), just like she's really not into the guns that I like. Tolerance of each others interests is what makes a relationship work. Good luck to you.
Link Posted: 6/21/2003 12:27:16 PM EDT
I would imagine you know what she wants. I would go with that. If you expect your marriage to fail as a reason for not getting her something she wants then I think it will be a self-fullfilling prophecy. I bought my wife a diamond a little under a carat with the best color quality I could find. The diamond is beautiful to look and with the ring cost almost $10,000. The problem with the stone is you can see a small crack inside with a magnifying glass. Without the crack the diamond alone would be worth almost $20,000. Her friends can't tell though when they look at it. Been 7 years and she is still crazy about her ring. Thats the important part for me.
Link Posted: 6/22/2003 3:40:19 PM EDT
Wow Everyone seems to have lots to say on this one. First let me say that yes I know about the whole bit about De Beers setting up the whole "diamond is a girls best friend" thing and yes they are overpriced. Now I realize that no matter what I get her she will be happy with it. A bit about her. She is not “overly girly" as she puts it. She is a firefighter (driver working on Lt) and is also a fomer Marine. For you ex jugs out there she could do 20 pull ups when she was in and routinely swims 2000 meters for exercise… and continually claims to be out of shape and fat. She is not, even a little. Oh yeah She is BEAUTIFUL. She claims to be a big shoe hound but isn't. I counted 7 pairs in her closet two of which are, a pair of ICBs (infantry Combat boots) for her for work and a pair of running shoes. She does little to excess in her life. We both own our own homes and when we get married we are actually going to have to get rid of furniature to move in together. Also she loves to shoot. When she was here visting last she was blasting away with my M-4 hitting sporting clays at 100 meters and reached up and shut the aimpoint off saying “it was too easy that way I want to see if I can still do it with open sights.” Now having said all of that her one weakness in life is jewlery. Diamonds to be specific, she just likes em sooooo What I was looking for was advice on how to maximize my dollar when it comes to buying a diamond. I know there is a tremedous mark up on these things. What I want to know is how to get through all the middle men. There ya go The IPSC_GUYS delima
Link Posted: 6/22/2003 4:37:20 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/22/2003 4:39:30 PM EDT by gregw45]
Originally Posted By IPSC_GUY: She is a firefighter (driver working on Lt) and is also a fomer Marine.
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Wow. You got a keeper! My vote would be for a simple gold band. Diamond earrings for her diamond fix.
Link Posted: 6/22/2003 6:32:47 PM EDT
Peter, Check out my reply 2 above your last one. Since she's a firefighter, hopefully she might know some reputable jeweler . . . wholesale jeweler is best. Figherfighters and cops seem to know all the business folks in the area, so find someone who is wholesale and can give you what you want ("build your own" like we did) for a good price. Markup on jewelry is typically 3x cost or more, that's why you regularly see 50% off sales! Not being in NC, I can't offer any more specifics to find a supplier for you. Stay away from the retail stores! I agree that she sounds like a "keeper"! You shouldn't have any problems keeping your toys and her desire to shoot with you proves it! Best wishes for a great life together!
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