Alternatively known as SHTF, in more serious forms. Sometimes it is hard to differentiate between an emergency and Spit Hits The Spam. Here are some guidelines so you can tell the difference.
When you think you are about to win the lottery, but get struck by lightning twice while getting bitten by a shark, the spit has hit the spam.
When you wreck your father's brand new expensive sports car, and don't die in the crash, the spit has hit the spam.
When roving packs of zombies are driving automobiles after the end of the world as we know it, in search of fresh flesh to eat, the spit has hit the spam!
When Britney Spears and N'Sync team up for another tour, the spit has hit the spam.
When Graboids have invaded your valley, and the guns and ammo are in the other room, the spit has hit the spam.
When it is discovered that the moonrocks the Apollo Eleven astronauts brought back from the moon were contaiminated with a virus that turns all exposed into aliens, the spit has hit the spam.
If enemy paratroops drop into central Colorado and take out NORAD and disable the lines of communication, the spit has hit the spam.
Those are just a few examples. But how does one go about preparing for Spit Hits The Spam scenarios? The Rule Of Threes applies here. Make you sure have a full chemical protection suit (boots, pants, top, mask and gloves) with you at all times. Make you you have a nuclear protection tarp and a shovel, so you can quickly dig a nuclear protection bunker. Always carry the vaccines to the one hundred most likely experienced diseases. You never know when you will need this equipment, and if you don't have it, you will be among the dead or dying!
Some survival kit essentials include fudge, porn magazine of choice, beer on ice, popcorn, a cellular phone (to dial 911), and a change of underwear.
More indepth preparations will include a Ruger 10/22 in .22LR. (LR is an abbreviation of "Long Rifle".) If it can't be done with ten rounds of .22LR, it can't be done at all! Make sure and go for head shots, when combating the hordes of undead recklessly driving automobiles. Since zombies are nothing more than decaying, soft tissue, use a hollowpoint round for the maximum impact, as it expands and created a wound channel much larger than the caliber as it was fired. Anything more powerful, like .308 or even .223, will go right through them. Full Metal Jacket bullets also will go right through without causing any appreciable damage.
Your survival gear will fit easily into an ALICE pack, and it is comfortable without a pack frame.
Don't be caught short!