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Posted: 12/13/2002 11:46:48 AM EDT
When I got home, the first thing I noticed was a satellite TV dish that wasn't there when I left. I went in and wifey told me that Bob had installed it and was waiting for me to get home so I could help him wire it up. Yeah, Right! I called Bob. Seems he got a pair of them out of the dumpster at the Sat TV place and they're broken, but look pretty official. Bob says that they are there so that Larry (The do good three or 4 doors down, next to Bob)will feel left out. The satellite guy just left Larry's house. Larry has been playing 'Keep up with the Jones' for years with Bob, and Bob's fed up. Larry just got satellite, and I'll bet you he signed up for the biggest program they have for about a gazillion year contract. First thing tomorrow, Bob and I are taking our dishes down. He owes me for this one! AT LEAST a dozen Krispy Kremes.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 11:49:23 AM EDT
Now THAT is funny.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 11:50:21 AM EDT
You know that is damn, goddamn funny
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 11:50:36 AM EDT
Heh heh. I like it. I really don't worry too much about keeping up with the Joneses, as long as I'm well ahead of the Schmidts, my next-door-idiot.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 11:59:52 AM EDT
You need to get one of those inflatable HUMVs for the driveway. Watch him shit a brick!!
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:01:44 PM EDT
I love it!
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:05:11 PM EDT
About 4 years ago, Bob rented a new car for a couple weeks. You got it, Larry went out and bought a new car. I laughed myself silly. Another 45K gone from his 401K!
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:05:26 PM EDT
Why don't you mount yours to the safe you snuck into the basement? That way, when the wife finds it, she will really be curious.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:08:39 PM EDT
Originally Posted By MrP: Why don't you mount yours to the safe you snuck into the basement? That way, when the wife finds it, she will really be curious.
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That's a GREAT idea!
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:08:46 PM EDT
Ought to get a super-huge satellite dish for your backyard, and see what he does...
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:14:04 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Energizer: Ought to get a super-huge satellite dish for your backyard, and see what he does...
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Yeah. Go to a surplus dealer and get about a 75 foot diameter dish and all sorts of scrap cable and really get it looking like something out of a sci fi thriller! A couple of huge Tesla Coils spouting sparks, the whole shitaree.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:50:57 PM EDT
Hilarious! If your friend is looking for suggestions: 1) park a new Mercedes or BMW SUV in his driveway - maybe a Humvee would be better 2) next Spring, have an outdoor pool company stop by and mark out the dimensions of the new pool that will be installed some time in the Summer 3) the huge satellite dish is good too 4) have him drop hints about a trip around the world 'next year' - if it works, the jerk'll be out of your friend's hair for a while Please keep us informed.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 12:53:10 PM EDT
Fake a heart attack and see if he drops dead.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 1:20:10 PM EDT
Start with the large satellite dish, and explain to him that you can get so many moer satellites, etc. Once he adds one to his collections, take it down, and tell him you are building a pool. Put a pool sign in the front of your yard-- the kind they use to advertise when they are putting a pool in.
Link Posted: 12/13/2002 1:30:14 PM EDT
ROFLMAO keep up the good work.!!!
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