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Posted: 7/4/2002 12:42:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/4/2002 2:07:52 PM EDT by KnockItOff]
I've been thinking on and off about enlisting. Over a year ago, a recruiter with the Navy had discussed it with me. I didn't take the ASVAB, but on the computerized test that will give an indication of how you will score, I only missed one question. I would almost bet the it was a reading comprehension question... I was distracted by a misspelling that I had found. He thought that I should go nuke. Given the current situation regarding the nuclear power plants and my new state of motherhood, I don't think that's such a good idea. My question really is about what options I would have regarding my son. He's almost 5 months old, and I know that I would probably have to be separated from him while I was in basic training. I could ask a recruiter, but I'm a bit afraid of doing that. I worry that they'll try to give me an answer that I will want to hear because I have a lot to offer - besides only missing one question on the computerized test, I graduated salutatorian from high school; have two associates degrees, graduating from college with a 3.92 GPA, and I accomplished all of that without needing to study. If an acceptable solution is offered for my son, my next question would be in which branch should I consider enlisting and in what field should I pursue an active interest? I'm fascinated by nearly everything, and learn quickly. Thanks, Judi
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:45:00 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/4/2002 12:49:00 PM EDT by redray]
all those intellectual accomplishments and you werent smart enough to have safe sex? im retired Navy and you dont impress me. neither will you impress the Navy establishment when your initial desire is for your son and not your patriotic duties. sorry to be blunt.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:48:00 PM EDT
Do you want to be a Mother first and foremost, or a Military person? To be blunt, a single parent cannot be both and do either well. You will either have to leave the child with friends or family a lot more than you think. Not trying to bust your bubble, just giving you the facts as I have seen them. My step sister has a baby and is in the Navy. In the last year my mother and her father have had the child about 6 months total. They are getting tired of it and she is getting whiney because she does not get to see her kid enough. She is also btw on a shore assignment, not aboard a ship. Aviator [img]www.milpubs.com/aviator.gif[/img]
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:48:41 PM EDT
I think your joining would be a bad idea. You are a single mom, and the military isn't really supposed to be a welfare program with guns, despite what DACOWITS said. Don't go. You will not be enhancing combat readiness, you will be a drain. Go get a job and pay taxes so that some addleheaded male of 17-21 years of age can go play army the way it was intended to be. If you go, you will be seperated from your son if you are in a critical needs MOS and there won't be anything you can do about it. You will also not be paid too much, and be treated like a dog as are all enlisted. Go take care of your son, stay out of the military.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:48:52 PM EDT
I'm book smart, and that's as much intelligence as I'll profess to have. As far as safe sex goes, I was married for almost 5 years and we never conceived. About two months after our divorce was final, his girlfriend announced that she was expecting. Considering that he and I had never used protection, I incorrectly assumed that I couldn't have children.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:52:47 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/4/2002 12:56:10 PM EDT by KnockItOff]
Get a job and pay taxes? I do both, THANK YOU. I'm going to have to delete this thread becuuse it's pissing me off. I'd forgotten how people jump to conclusions and make judgments about people they don't know. As far as thinking the military is a welfare program... I'm not on welfare, either, btw... I don't. I have a lot to offer and happen to think that it's much wasted where I work. There are certainly better uses for the skills that I possess and was merely exploring the alternatives available to me. Redray - I'm not out to impress anyone. I certainly haven't a very good image of myself. My son is my first priority, which is why I posted this here to see what experiences people have had when they've had children while being in the military. At least I'm not being stupid enough to jump into something without having asked people who have firsthand knowledge of what it's like.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 12:53:56 PM EDT
Commit to spending a year with your son before you make any major life change. Give yourself time to weigh all the possibilities of such a decision. Your choices affect him 100%. Remember, whenever you get something you are giving something up.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 1:00:19 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/4/2002 1:00:56 PM EDT by redray]
judi, you asked. we answered. lots of Vets here. and most of them dont pussyfoot around. (me included) be glad to get your responses here instead of after you have signed enlistment papers. sorry for the assumption i made.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 1:07:47 PM EDT
I do appreciate the responses, as well as the honesty. I apologize for the curt and rather snotty reply that I made. I've been through a lot lately, and have become a little short-tempered. It seems this alternative is out for me. Thanks for the input...
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 1:15:33 PM EDT
Judi I can tell you for a fact that the U.S. Marines are out. For you to join you must first give up custody of your child. I know this as a former recruiter and MEPS Liason in Philly from 97-00 and I am almost certain that this applies to all services. Now a good recruiter, who needs a contract, knows how to get around this and get you in. However, when you get to boot camp he or she is not there to help you answer particular questions, that may or may not get you thrown out of the service. My advice to you is don't join the military!
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 1:17:28 PM EDT
Good decision
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 1:30:38 PM EDT
I was in the Airforce and was stationed stateside. Unfortunetly my career field requiered that, they took out the Nuclear missles in Turkey. My job in the Airforce was working on the Minuteman 3 nuclear missle silos while stationed at Malmstrom AFB, in Great Falls Montana. I will be very honest with you, and I hope you do not get offended. The military in my honest opinion is better suited for single people, and single people with no children. The military is a very demanding career. All of your energy and focus will be towards your job in the service and to what branch of service one would choose to enlist in. Everything else will be second. Your child deserves to have the best that you can offer physically,emotionally, and financially, especially since you are a single parent. The military quite frankly is not very flexible with issues such as the one you are in, and rightfully so, they should not be, the military is charged with to protect the united states of america, and to serve the president of the united states, you being a female singel parent will find yourself in conflict naturally with these obligations. You would be more inclined naturally to want to put your child first instead of your service to the military and to the president of the united states. Quite frankly not only yourself, but your child would be misserable, and your child would not get the best from you as its parent! The military requires total dedication, I saw plenty of marriages split up when I was in the service, and I saw plenty of children not likeing the fact that there parent had to be gone from home for days on end. I am glad that I was young and single and had no children while I was in the service, it made things much simpler and easier. I personally respect your desires to want to serve our nation, but I must be frank, dont do it, it will not be a good thing for you and your child.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 2:13:02 PM EDT
Do what is right for your child, be the best mother that you can be... you can not do that while in the military. You have the drive, apply it. You and your child WILL make it.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 2:18:03 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/4/2002 2:34:46 PM EDT by QCMGR]
If you feel the need to serve [s]go into the reserve or guard[/s]. Finish your four year degree and get a good civilian job. It will pay more and a civilian employer will be more flexible. The bottom line: You should be a parent first and have a career second.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 2:27:37 PM EDT
Originally Posted By QCMGR: If you feel the need to serve go into the reserve or guard. Finish your four year degree and get a good civilian job. It will pay more and a civilian employer will be more flexible. The bottom line: You should be a parent first and have a career second.
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Stay the hell out of the guard and reserves as well- my neighbor just returned home from Bosnia--- to her 2 year-old son. And she is in the guard. National Guard my ass- they sent her ass to Bosnia for 8 months.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 2:33:13 PM EDT
Originally Posted By dissipator556:
Originally Posted By QCMGR: If you feel the need to serve go into the reserve or guard. Finish your four year degree and get a good civilian job. It will pay more and a civilian employer will be more flexible. The bottom line: You should be a parent first and have a career second.
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Stay the hell out of the guard and reserves as well- my neighbor just returned home from Bosnia--- to her 2 year-old son. And she is in the guard. National Guard my ass- they sent her ass to Bosnia for 8 months.
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My bad, I forgot it is not like the old days. KnockItOff, Finish school and get a real job.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 2:43:03 PM EDT
My job isn't awful... I make $24,000 a year working for the county government. What I hate about it is that I spend a lot of time doing stupid jobs to waste time. My boss doesn't like that I'm so eager to help everyone else with their work because one of my co-workers is lazy and won't ever help. I guess my boss finds it more acceptable for me to waste time than for the lazy person. The problem with finishing school is that I don't know what I want to study. I have degrees in accounting and business administration. Neither hold much appeal. I'm very good at math, which is why I studied accounting, but I don't have much interest in tax law. Having a four year degree and becoming a CPA is consequently not something that I wish to pursue. I also have a problem with the credits that I earned in college... They don't transfer, so if I go back to college, I would have to start over.
Link Posted: 7/4/2002 3:08:56 PM EDT
Originally Posted By KnockItOff: My job isn't awful... I make $24,000 a year working for the county government. What I hate about it is that I spend a lot of time doing stupid jobs to waste time. My boss doesn't like that I'm so eager to help everyone else with their work because one of my co-workers is lazy and won't ever help. I guess my boss finds it more acceptable for me to waste time than for the lazy person.
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You will never get past this type of politics. The only option is to work for yourself or have a skill that will allow you to change jobs. This is why you need to finish school with a marketable skill.
The problem with finishing school is that I don't know what I want to study. I have degrees in accounting and business administration. Neither hold much appeal. I'm very good at math, which is why I studied accounting, but I don't have much interest in tax law. Having a four year degree and becoming a CPA is consequently not something that I wish to pursue.
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I have an AS in Aviation Maintenance, BS, in Criminology with a minor in Aviation Maintenance and MS in Quality. I still do not know what I want to do. You have a family. You owe it to them to find a high paying skill. I work as a Sr. Corporate Quality Engineer. The work sucks but it pays real well.
I also have a problem with the credits that I earned in college... They don't transfer, so if I go back to college, I would have to start over.
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What school did you go to? In MI if you graduate from an accredited two year program, the state colleges and universities have to take your credits. The last thing you want to be is a 35 year old single mom making next to nothing when you can invest the time now and secure your future.
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