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Posted: 5/17/2002 4:56:10 PM EDT
[#1]
1. Women will [b][i]always[/i][/b] screw you over!
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:17:26 PM EDT
[#2]
From one of my favorite relatives...
"Throw a rock into a crowd and you're bound to hit a moron." |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:22:38 PM EDT
[#3]
* You can't have too many guns, but a POS gun is +1 too many.
* AW's! I want more AW's![heavy] * Hi-caps! I want more hi-caps! * An unjust law is an oxymoron. * Gun bans make as much sense as the those who support them.[whacko] * You can't (& shouldn't) be nice to some people. Much less, elect them to office.[pissed] * [blue]AR15.com[/blue] is the best thing since the the internet. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:24:25 PM EDT
[#4]
Any lane you change to in traffic in order to pass some moron automatically slows down, allowing the moron to further torment you.
All people are stupid. Just give them time to prove themselves. Scientists and researchers spend vast sums of money annually in order to re-invent existing products in attempts to make them idiot-proof. In the meantime, the universe is busy building better idiots. the_reject |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:29:15 PM EDT
[#5]
2 wrongs don't make a Right, but 3 Rights do make a Left...
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:44:08 PM EDT
[#6]
Most people are shit.
Most Dogs are not. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 5:57:48 PM EDT
[#7]
Where ever you go, there you are.
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Posted: 5/17/2002 6:04:06 PM EDT
[#8]
We all will die!
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Posted: 5/17/2002 6:06:15 PM EDT
[#9]
Form should follow function.
Never buy (marry) anything just for looks. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 6:34:55 PM EDT
[#10]
You start dying the minute you are born.
Aviator [img]www.milpubs.com/aviator.gif[/img] |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 6:37:42 PM EDT
[#11]
No good deed goes unpunished.
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Posted: 5/17/2002 6:40:35 PM EDT
[#12]
Fall down seven times, Stand up eight.
The best way to avoid responsibility is to say- "I have responsibilities". We teach best that which we most need to learn. On a clear Disk you can search forever... what the catapillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly... |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:01:12 PM EDT
[#13]
1 turn in 7 inches is the best all around rifling twist for use in AR-15 type rifles for the bullet weights most commonly used in these rifles.
You can't push a rope. The lift-curve slope of a three dimensional wing is approximately 0.1/degree. The acceleration due to gravity is 32.174 feet per second, per second. It is also 9.81 meters per second, per second. Calculate the RPM of a bullet at the muzzle from - Bullet RPM = (Muzzle Velocity)*720/(Rifling Twist). Example: MV = 3000 fps, rifling is 1 turn in 10 inches; the RPM = 3000(720)/10 = 216000 rpm. Lights up, sights up. Lights down, sights down. [This refers to the effect ambient light outdoors can have on elevation zeroes and the need to adjust your hold or sight when the light changes.] Pie are round. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:01:30 PM EDT
[#14]
When approaching a multi-lane toll booth never get behind the guy in the Rennault; he's already made the wrong decision.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three do. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:07:29 PM EDT
[#15]
Cotton Balls and Vasaline are the best fire starter know to man.
Except incendary grenades and napalm of course |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:19:41 PM EDT
[#16]
Ok, here is some personal tips I've picked up along the way.
1. Never play cards or pool with a guy who has a Nick name of a city or the Nick name "fats" 2. Any time someone says "trust me" it usually translates into "your fuked" 3. Never tell anyone anything you would not want to see on the front page of the newspaper. 4. Your lawyer still gets paid if you go to jail. 5. After year 5 a President has nothing to lose by pissing you off. 6. The most efficient governments are usually dictatorships. 7. I'd rather be in a stadium full of gunowners than a room full of Trekies. 8. It is better to be judged by 12 than carried by six. 9. It takes the Average time of 4mins to police to arrive to a call, It takes me less that 4secs to draw a handgun. 10. When you can't put a thought in their head, give em' a bullet instead. JerrY |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:21:14 PM EDT
[#17]
The three most hated things in life you will never get away from are death, taxes and liberals[V]
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:28:05 PM EDT
[#18]
Don't stick your finger where you won't stick your face.
A hand in the bush is better than two birds any day. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:34:05 PM EDT
[#19]
When in panic, fear, or doubt, run in circles, scream, and shout.
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:34:05 PM EDT
[#20]
2 quarters are better than a 50-cent piece. [:E]
There isn't a "cent sign key" on your keyboard... [shock] Real breasts are WAY better than silicon jobs; especially if they're big. [bounce] The rubber butt plugs made to fit in your AR's pistol grip should be shoved up the ass of the guy that invented them (...and you should get a refund). [flame] AR15.com is the best place to waste your time on the internet. [8D] In space, no one can hear you scream. [;D] Life is just a game; fly a paper plane, and there is no end... [whacko] [Ringo Starr] |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 7:53:43 PM EDT
[#21]
1)Women turn mean and stupid upon eating wedding cake.
2) Old, but more true every day I age--If a job's worth doing it's worth doing [b]right[/b] the first time. 3) Another oldie, but goodie--The bitterness of poor quality lingers long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten. Quality is worth the price!! 4) I can't comment on the posts of others, so I will repeat, and add, to Marsh's: No good deed goes unpunished, especially if you are AntiUSSA. 5) A scope should cost roughly what the rifle does. A cheap scope is worse than a chapped arsehole. 6) You can get away with much more noise/movement with deer than you can turkeys. 7) Buy land--they ain't makin' any more. 8) A niece or nephew provides more sheer joy than anything else, including firearms, but especially if they are shooting/enjoying firearms. 9) The common bond we have at ARFCOM makes for deep friendships that are easy to establish, as the important stuff is able to be taken for granted. There are simply many, many very honorable men and women here. I value each of you greatly. [:)] 10) Doing the right/honorable thing is especially important when no one else is looking and no one else will ever know. Honor and character count above all else. 11) One quick way to judge a man is by observing the way he treats someone who can do him absolutely nothing of value. Men eagerly change a tire in the rain if you show cleavage and have a slit in your mini skirt. A man worth calling "friend" is the one who will do the same for an elderly person of no obvious wealth. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 8:00:45 PM EDT
[#22]
If a man calls you a horses ass,Its just a matter of opinion.
If three of your friends call you a horses ass,Get some new friends. If every body you know calls you a horses ass,Time to get a saddle! Bob [8D] |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 8:09:06 PM EDT
[#23]
Drink beer the night before a deer hunt. It will dehydrate you and there will be no urge to piss while in the stand. Take water to the stand with you. You will need it because you had beer last night and you are dehydrated. [:)]
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Posted: 5/17/2002 8:10:20 PM EDT
[#24]
On Reloading 9x19mm (via Dean Grennell): The number of berdan-primed cases you will encounter will always exceed your supply of decapping pins by at least one.
On Reloading in general: Published loading data is to be used as a guideline; common sense is to be used above all. If you're getting flat primers 0.5 grain below published maximum -STOP- you've already exceeded your firearm's maximum load. If you are going above published numbers, you're on your own, not that is always a bad thing if you know what you're doing. Ask yourself: Do you? Firearm maintenance: Do not put off cleaning or repairing any firearm you own. They are, by definition, lifesaving tools and should be treated like any other surgical instrument and maintained accordingly. On Woodworking and Metalworking: Measure twice, cut once. Err to large side, you can always adjust and cut it again. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 8:46:45 PM EDT
[#25]
"If it smells too bad to eat, for heaven's sake dont stick your dick in it!"
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Posted: 5/17/2002 9:17:05 PM EDT
[#26]
Once the smell is gone, you know you've got it half licked. [rolleyes]
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Posted: 5/17/2002 9:40:42 PM EDT
[#27]
1. All civilian ownership of guns will be banned in the U.S.
2. ALL governments are destined to fail. |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 10:52:39 PM EDT
[#28]
Never pass up an opportunity to take a piss.
The only thins you gotta do in life are: pay taxes, die, and take a shit once in a while. No-one who is fit for governance will ever get the job - they don't want it. Be suspect of those who actually do... We don't use TP twice - why do we keep re-electing congresscritters? Once they have proven themselves worthless, it is time to dispose of them. Measure with a micrometer. Mark with chalk. Cut with an ax. There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over. After years of careful testing and diligent observation, I have determined that the Universe is composed of precisely two substances, ixed in varying proportions. Those two substances are Magic and Bullshit. Never argue with an idiot. They will simply drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. Don't try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig. Likewise, don't wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig enjoys it! A zygote is a gamete's way of making more gametes. This may be the basic purpose of the Universe. When the wife asks how many cars/guns/whatever a man needs, the proper answer is "one more..." no matter how many you already have. This is why I have three Jeeps in the driveway and so damn many parts in the garage... A successful marriage depends upon two things. They are... unknown to me.... Always listen to experts. They will tell you what can't be done and why. Then go do it anyway. FFZ |
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Posted: 5/17/2002 11:44:17 PM EDT
[#29]
No one forgets where they buried the hatchet.
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Posted: 5/18/2002 3:39:21 AM EDT
[#30]
We make plans and God laughs!
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Posted: 5/18/2002 4:57:26 AM EDT
[#31]
A golf course is a sad misuse of a perfectly good rifle range.
Never eat at a place called Mom's. Nylon holsters suck. Stunningly beautiful women are usually nuts. It's not what you once did, it's what you can do on demand. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 5:25:29 AM EDT
[#32]
Quoted: Where ever you go, there you are. Incorrect. I can never get there, I will always be here. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 5:43:15 AM EDT
[#33]
When life gives you lemons, squirt lemon juice in that rat bastards’ eyes,
edited to add: Con games by mail are most efficient, your $19.95 stamped portrait of Lincoln will always be mailed the minute your credit card is approved. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 5:44:33 AM EDT
[#34]
1)If you cant find time to do it right the first time, how will you find time to do it again?
2) Once the moron powers make a law, that freedom is gone forever. They make new laws everyday, but NEVER repeal any. 3) [b]NEVER[/b] eat anything that gets up and walks away! 4) IF she is attracted to me, she is a psycho mother f*****!!!! And 5, sadly enough was my personal brainchild in 1995 after an office debate with a moron regarding flying safety. It was put on my first webpage shortly thereafter, and I got a dozen calls last fall from people who remembered me saying it over and over and over.... You dont have to be on a plane to go in a plane crash today. [b]IF[/b] its your day, the plane will land on ya... I am sorry I had to see the day this became true forever... One last ode to stupidity... You cant protect stupid people. Wrap them up in bubble wrap, and leave them in their bed..they will just roll face down and suffocate. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 5:50:34 AM EDT
[#35]
Never bet a man at his own game.
Never argue with an idiot, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. Never fuck a cripple. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 6:04:50 AM EDT
[#36]
You won't hear the one that kills you. [B)]
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Posted: 5/18/2002 6:56:53 AM EDT
[#37]
-It's an imperfect world.
-It'll all be different after the revolution. -The meek shall inherit the earth - when we're done with it. -Abortion stops a beating heart. Religion stops a thinking mind. P3[pyro][peep][heavy] |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 7:10:51 AM EDT
[#38]
Everything a man does just goes to shit.
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:01:02 AM EDT
[#39]
This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time.
====================================== Tyler: You know why they have oxygen masks on planes? Narrator: So you can breath. Tyler: Oxygen gets you high. In a catastrophic emergency, your taking giant, panicked breaths. That leads you to become euphoic, docile. You accept our fate. It's all right here. Emergency water landing, 600 miles an hour. Blank faces, calm as Hindu cows. ===================================== |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:33:11 AM EDT
[#40]
Never trust a person that flatters you constantly. That person is a liar and a leach. A liar because you ain't that good and a leach because he/she wants something from you.
When speaking with a leo, in his/her official capacity, always be polite and say as little as possible. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:33:53 AM EDT
[#41]
W.C. Fields: "Tomorrow I will be sober but you sir will still be ugly."
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:38:51 AM EDT
[#42]
You see sores and bad vaginal discharge, stay away. Smell is another clue, No one needs it that bad.
Herpes is forever. Always have a stash of cash that the wife doesnt know about. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:50:01 AM EDT
[#43]
Don't spit/piss into the wind.
Be prepared when TSHTF (hypocritical). Don't get into a relationship to make someone happy. Unless it's yourself. CYA! Pi is exactly three. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 8:53:09 AM EDT
[#44]
Only two things in the world smell like fish and one of them is fish.
Next, click the "Tools" menu. There should be a picture of you there since you are a tool. Remember, the plural of 'moron' is 'focus group'. It can't be stressed enough how important it is to have the shiny side pointing out. Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat. The two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 9:16:33 AM EDT
[#45]
If it's worth doing, it's worth doing well.
If worms had machineguns, birds wouldn't f$ck with 'em. DINSTAAR |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 9:20:04 AM EDT
[#46]
Never trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesnt die.
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Posted: 5/18/2002 10:17:03 AM EDT
[#47]
"The only cure for the presidential bug is embalming fluid."
- Commentator on the likelihood of Gore running again. |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 10:35:30 AM EDT
[#48]
Other than death and taxes there is one more
certainty: If you sleep on the floor, you can't fall out of bed. Gunhamr |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 11:39:22 AM EDT
[#49]
You can't save everybody....
just try not to be living next door when they go off Dennis Miller No matter how gorgeous she is, someone is tired of putting up with her bullshit |
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Posted: 5/18/2002 12:43:18 PM EDT
[#50]
An appreciation of music and a sense of humor are among the things required for a happy life.
Playing a musical instrument greatly incrreases one and does not hurt the other. |
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