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Posted: 4/19/2002 12:44:32 PM EDT
According to the American Heart Association, heart disease has killed more Americans every year but one since 1900. Forget guns. Bacon is the real killer.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:45:27 PM EDT
Not Canadian bacon! But its so tasty!
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:47:21 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Scarecrow: Not Canadian bacon! But its so tasty!
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But it's for the children, eh?
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:49:22 PM EDT
Actually eating a lot of meat (ie. protein)isn't bad for you. Eat a lot of meat with a lot of carbs will kill you.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:49:42 PM EDT
Bacon??? Bacon??? Oh God... the humanity...
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:51:30 PM EDT
Do it for the piggies!
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:51:36 PM EDT
I better read that other Catholic thread cause I think it struck a chord in Jarhead_22's existance [:D]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:52:20 PM EDT
Originally Posted By cgwahl: Actually eating a lot of meat (ie. protein)isn't bad for you. Eat a lot of meat with a lot of carbs will kill you.
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Bacon isn't meat, partner. 98 or 99 percent of the calories from bacon are from fat.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:53:26 PM EDT
A timely topic. I'm leaving in about 10 minutes to go get a bacon chilli cheeseburger. Hmmm bacon. If bacon is outlawed, then only outlaws will have bacon. Of course, they'll be fat and happy outlaws.[:)]z
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 12:55:44 PM EDT
The banning of bacon would greatly limit the number of toppings on a baked potato. Breakfast would be forever altered. BLT's would just be LT's. The Bacon Cheeseburger would become just a simple Cheeseburger. Bacon bits would just be bits. We need bacon, it is an essential part of everyday life.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:00:10 PM EDT
Looks like We should stockpile som pre-ban while we can. Especially since we can still get it in those high capacity packages. And we all know that it will eventually lead to them being designated as Heart-Destructive Devices and require a special heart screening test before you can purchase them along with a tax stamp. After the ban we'll be limited to extra-lean bacon in 10 strip packs with warning labels and registration numbers. It won't just be the BATF anymore....it'll be the BPATF - the Bureau of Pork, Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:01:02 PM EDT
I know what we can do with it if it gets banned. Send all the bacon up on C130's and drop them over Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, Iraq and all the other 'pork loving' countries....
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:01:41 PM EDT
You can't ban bacon! The Bacon industry would fail! The pork belly futures market would dry up! The economy would collapse, and the world would be thrown into a neverending depression causing famine and pestilence that would ravage humanity! For the sake of the human race, dont ban bacon! Besides, the stuff is sooo tasty![;)]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:02:30 PM EDT
The liberal bovine lobbiests will not like this. Dont you think such an action would racially discriminate against cows?
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:03:29 PM EDT
I forgot to ask: Is that semi-auto or pump-action bacon???
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:10:50 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Boomholzer: I forgot to ask: Is that semi-auto or pump-action bacon???
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Hey Boom, if you're pumping your bacon, none of the rest of us want to know about it. [:D]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:12:08 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:24:16 PM EDT
Hey, this thread isnt Kosher!
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:27:02 PM EDT
MMMMMmmmmmm...bacon grease. Homer
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:37:22 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Jarhead_22:
Originally Posted By Boomholzer: I forgot to ask: Is that semi-auto or pump-action bacon???
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Hey Boom, if you're pumping your bacon, none of the rest of us want to know about it. [:D]
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LOL The sheep lobbiests would feel ignored.[:D]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:46:49 PM EDT
Theres something not kosher about this thread .
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:49:31 PM EDT
This thread makes me wonder, if all the fat in Rosie O'Doughnut was rendered, would anything else be left?
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:55:50 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 1:59:38 PM EDT
In the immortal words of Emeril Lagasse "Pork Fat Rules!"
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 2:02:07 PM EDT
Elvis used to eat it out of a bowl like popcorn. Hey, if its good enough for the King........
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 2:09:12 PM EDT
You guys have missed the big one. NO MORE [b]PORK RINDS[/b]!!!![shock]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 2:32:36 PM EDT
Why bother, if bacon is banned Goatboy will just let him back in. Oh wait, what were we talking about again?
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 2:39:20 PM EDT
"Seared strips of swine flesh"........[(:|)]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 5:10:59 PM EDT
If bacon is banned, we can blame it on Israel. [:D]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:19:25 PM EDT
In my best dog voice: [size=6][red][b]IT'S BACON!!![/size=6][/red][/b]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:30:36 PM EDT
The Justice Department will have to launch an investigation into Big Bacon.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:34:33 PM EDT
Homer Simpson Sleepwalking: "Unexplained Bacon"
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:35:57 PM EDT
You'll get my bacon when you pry it from my cold dead BLT. [b]Ban Canned Spam!!![/b]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:40:19 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Jarhead_22:
Originally Posted By Boomholzer: I forgot to ask: Is that semi-auto or pump-action bacon???
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Hey Boom, if you're pumping your bacon, none of the rest of us want to know about it. [:D]
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That was a really good one, Jarhead. Thanks for the laugh.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:43:40 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 6:46:46 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/19/2002 6:47:33 PM EDT by toaster]
Me wonders what TheRedGoat will have to say about this. As to the original question? [size=6][red]NO!!![/red][/size=6]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 7:05:08 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 7:14:42 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Scarecrow: Not Canadian bacon! But its so tasty!
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Come on, we all know that Canadian bacon is just a HAM disc! It's a given you guys make great Hockey players, but your bacon sucks! Real, yummy, heart clogging bacon is in long, greasy, fat coated strips!!!! [:D]
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 9:23:00 PM EDT
That's not bacon! [img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/coyote3%2Fcan%5Fbacon%2Ejpg[/img] This is bacon! [img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/coyote3%2Fbacon%2Ejpg[/img] coyote3
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 9:26:05 PM EDT
I agree. We need to ban the works and theories of Bacon. He's a dead white guy, a scientist from the western tradition, and used too much logic. Today's youth would never comprehend it.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 9:49:29 PM EDT
If you eat the milk with the meat, such as cheese on a hamburger, YOU ARE A SYMPATHIZER OF PALESTINIAN TERRORISM.
Link Posted: 4/19/2002 10:05:55 PM EDT
I agree with Cypher214 on this one. But don't worry if bacon gets banned we'll still have those illegal bacon shipments from Mexico and Columbia. I hear that Kalifornistan might be the first to outright ban bacon!!!!!
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 11:39:07 AM EDT
If bacon was banned who would you people have sex with?
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 11:44:42 AM EDT
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 11:51:56 AM EDT
Give me bacon or give me death!!
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 11:52:06 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Tantalus: I hear that Kalifornistan might be the first to outright ban bacon!!!!!
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Nah, Crapifornia is just gonna' tax it. Remember, it's for your own good.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 12:08:39 PM EDT
If the piggie is born before the ban goes into effect, but is not slaughtered until a post ban date, is the bacon legal or the piggie a ham bone only piggie?
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 1:01:16 PM EDT
If bacon is outlawed, only outlaws will have bacon.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 2:14:40 PM EDT
Damn it, I'm confused already. Now do I have this right?.... Pre-ban bacon can have a smoke arrestor, and can be sold in packages with more than 10 slices. Post-ban bacon can only be bought in packages with 10 slices or fewer, otherwise it must be plainly marked "FOR EXECUTIVE BRANCH USE ONLY". You cannot use a bayonet to slice it. Bacon that has two or more conspicuous features, or bacon that resembles certain types of bacon used by the military will require a Class III license. Finally, bacon of any kind may be purchased only after passing a Brady cholesterol check.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 2:52:43 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Imbroglio: If you eat the milk with the meat, such as cheese on a hamburger, YOU ARE A SYMPATHIZER OF PALESTINIAN TERRORISM.
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How does one "Eat" milk? From what I remember, you are supposed to drink the stuff. Just funnin' 'ya Imbrog.. heehee[:)]
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