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Posted: 9/11/2010 6:15:05 PM EDT
take so fucking long to get out of a damn car???

I decided to hit some yard sales this morning. I put the address in the GPS stopped at the first one jumped out of the car...look behind my wife is nowhere to be found. Walk back to the car the wife is putting shit into her pocket book, fixing her hair, adjusting her sunglasses...etc.

Put the next address into the GPS jump out...once again the wife is dragging her ass.

This continued at every garage sale.

WTF?

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:17:59 PM EDT
I hate when I am tring to get into somewhere. There won't be a line at all but we pull up right when 3 or 4 car loads of people do. I hop out thinking we can just head right in. We always end up 20th in the line right behind all the other people that just pulled up.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:32:12 PM EDT
Maybe she didn't want to go to the garage sales and was buying time away from watching people haggle over a $0.25 piece of garbage?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:34:18 PM EDT
She's gotta upstage the other women she might come across.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:35:27 PM EDT
Originally Posted By SGocka:
Maybe she didn't want to go to the garage sales and was buying time away from watching people haggle over a $0.25 piece of garbage?


Perhaps.... the old passive-aggressive delay technique?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:35:58 PM EDT
She is passive-aggreswivel. She maintains control of you by delaying the pace of your activities.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:36:45 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 6:40:36 PM EDT by 40xb-shooter]
IBPJ

In Before Plane Jane
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:40:04 PM EDT
I don't know... but I tell mine that she had better learn to move faster for when the Zombies come, because if she can't unass a vehicle quickly and efficiently under no stress, she'll be fucked with a dozen Zach's coming towards the car.


Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:41:31 PM EDT
because THEY THINK they're worth the wait................
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:45:22 PM EDT
How about we just focus on the nice things they do for us and the shit they put up with to be with us instead of bitching about everything they do thats annoying.......Oh wait ......this is GD......in that case its because they have vaginas...
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:50:37 PM EDT
Originally Posted By nicojh:
How about we just focus on the nice things they do for us and the shit they put up with to be with us instead of bitching about everything they do thats annoying.......Oh wait ......this is GD......in that case its because they have vaginas...


That's a mighty powerful argument.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:57:54 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 40xb-shooter:
IBPJ

In Before Plane Jane

I saw this one when it had three replies, but sometimes even I get tired of beating up idiots.

Jane





Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:58:37 PM EDT
Chill out dude. My wife probably thinks the same thing about me. I typically stop the truck, check that I have two truck keys on me, move my .380 from the console to my pocket, look around see what's going on around us, make sure all windows are closed, and then get out. She is doing the same as you, wondering what is taking me so long. Getting back to the truck from a restaurant or store its the other way around. She is jabbering with strangers, checking makeup, stopping at the restroom, looking at something on the wall, etc. By the time she is in the truck I have it running and cooled down inside. There are many things in life that you just have to tolerate.

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 6:59:36 PM EDT
It don't get any better...twenty years in and, I even have a bad back.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:00:18 PM EDT
Originally Posted By PlaneJane:
Originally Posted By 40xb-shooter:
IBPJ

In Before Plane Jane

I saw this one when it had three replies, but sometimes even I get tired of beating up idiots.

Jane







Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:02:47 PM EDT
I inadvertently lock my wife in the car with my key fob all the time. I tried to explain that she is too slow, but she refuses to own her slowness and insists I'm wrong for locking her in. Occasionally I'll do it on purpose, because, deep down, I'm sure she thinks it's funny.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:05:21 PM EDT
My knee is so fucked up my wife can get out, shop, and get back in the car before I locked the cardoor.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:07:42 PM EDT
My fiance does the same thing when she is driving her car. She stops completely then puts it in park(good on transmission so not complaining), but then turns off the radio, turn off the blower fan, checks her phone or something dumb, then finally gets out. Sometimes I'm already in the store before she gets out.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:11:30 PM EDT
They're all the same!

I pull up and stop. Get out of the car. Go 15 maybe 20 paces and the wife and girls have not even opened the doors. Usually, they are putting on their shoes, combing their hair or who knows what. I've gotten to where I don't even look back most of the time.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:14:37 PM EDT
If you think you have problems now just wait till menopause comes along! I can't believe I survived it but somehow I'm reasonably sane yet.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:18:43 PM EDT
I have more trouble with her getting out of the house.

I can shit, shower, shave, take the dogs out, eat a meal, and solve world hunger before she manages to get her teeth brushed.

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:27:03 PM EDT
All I had to read was the thread title and I knew my response. "I don't know."
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:36:08 PM EDT
I'm just lucky I found an attractive woman who has the patience to put up with my crazy ass.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:41:24 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Averagebear:
She is passive-aggreswivel. She maintains control of you by delaying the pace of your activities.


Is she swivelling??? Or just plain passive-aggressive??? Inquiring minds want to know.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:41:48 PM EDT
If these are the types of things you guys get spun up about, I worry for your collective blood pressures!

OTOH, I'm sure my BF wonders the same thing about me since he is usually trying to get out of the car before it's even in park... (Which I find terribly annoying!) So I guess it's even
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:46:44 PM EDT
My wife fills up the gas tank in her car when the needle is about 1/8 inch below the E.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 7:53:19 PM EDT
we people wonder why the divorce rate is high here.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:00:47 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 1903pa:
If you think you have problems now just wait till menopause comes along! I can't believe I survived it but somehow I'm reasonably sane yet.


so what was the worst part about having menopause?

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:01:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 8:01:55 PM EDT by GlutealCleft]
Just fart right as you come to a stop.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:02:33 PM EDT
Make her ride in the back of the truck. If that's still not fast enough, get a dump bed.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:20:56 PM EDT
Just a bit of advice. Not that it was asked for. hehe. Don't get upset. If you get upset you fail. If you plan for this behavior, and it doesn't bother you, you win. It's truly that simple. Sounds TOO simple I know. If she takes four hours to get ready to go out tell her how great she looks when she's done. If she makes herself pretty before going into a public venue do the same. Don't be a victim. You are a man. You plan ahead and accommodate shit like this. If you are in control of yourself and the activities of daily life she will feel confidence in you. If you get upset and rattled over little shit she will lose faith in your place as a man. This may sound sexist or whatever, but it's true. I think women are absolutely equal to men, but we have different roles. Part of a man's role is to be stable, unaffected by piddly shit, and to plan ahead. She has reasons for her behavior whether you understand them or not. It's good you are talking about your troubles though. Problems like these are fixable. Be a man and plan for this. Don't let little things shake you up. Let her know that you appreciate her looking her best for you. Slap her ass and tell her how sexy she is when she fixes herself up for you! Lol!
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:22:46 PM EDT

Originally Posted By 2IDdoc:
Just a bit of advice. Not that it was asked for. hehe. Don't get upset. If you get upset you fail. If you plan for this behavior, and it doesn't bother you, you win. It's truly that simple. Sounds TOO simple I know. If she takes four hours to get ready to go out tell her how great she looks when she's done. If she makes herself pretty before going into a public venue do the same. Don't be a victim. You are a man. You plan ahead and accommodate shit like this. If you are in control of yourself and the activities of daily life she will feel confidence in you. If you get upset and rattled over little shit she will lose faith in your place as a man. This may sound sexist or whatever, but it's true. I think women are absolutely equal to men, but we have different roles. Part of a man's role is to be stable, unaffected by piddly shit, and to plan ahead. She has reasons for her behavior whether you understand them or not. It's good you are talking about your troubles though. Problems like these are fixable. Be a man and plan for this. Don't let little things shake you up. Let her know that you appreciate her looking her best for you. Slap her ass and tell her how sexy she is when she fixes herself up for you! Lol!

Ditto
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:24:51 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Averagebear:
She is passive-aggreswivel. She maintains control of you by delaying the pace of your activities.

This.

She is passively letting you know who is in control of the pace at which you will visiting these garage sales. Nobody likes to be in control of nothing. She has staked her claim on the pace of your

activities.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 8:26:10 PM EDT
slow down

enjoy life

she is probably sitting in the car wondering why the fuck you are jumping out like Freddy the Fireman everytime you stop
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:16:38 PM EDT
Uh.... any of you gentlemen ever consider opening the car door for the lady? I'm just sayin' ....
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:35:41 PM EDT
Using "why" and "women" in the same sentence = FAIL..

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:36:32 PM EDT
Why do women


No matter what the rest of that sentence is...I dont fucking know.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:54:52 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Tekka:
She's gotta upstage the other women she might come across.


This
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 5:50:54 AM EDT
Originally Posted By flyfishnepa:
Originally Posted By 1903pa:
If you think you have problems now just wait till menopause comes along! I can't believe I survived it but somehow I'm reasonably sane yet.


so what was the worst part about having menopause?



Ha Ha! I wasn't specific about who had it, but when your wife goes through it, its like nuclear radiation, all are affected!
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 5:54:11 AM EDT

Her Majesty will conduct herself at a pace that suits her, not you.

Haven't you figured that out yet?
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 5:54:30 AM EDT
Originally Posted By LungShot:

Originally Posted By 2IDdoc:
Just a bit of advice. Not that it was asked for. hehe. Don't get upset. If you get upset you fail. If you plan for this behavior, and it doesn't bother you, you win. It's truly that simple. Sounds TOO simple I know. If she takes four hours to get ready to go out tell her how great she looks when she's done. If she makes herself pretty before going into a public venue do the same. Don't be a victim. You are a man. You plan ahead and accommodate shit like this. If you are in control of yourself and the activities of daily life she will feel confidence in you. If you get upset and rattled over little shit she will lose faith in your place as a man. This may sound sexist or whatever, but it's true. I think women are absolutely equal to men, but we have different roles. Part of a man's role is to be stable, unaffected by piddly shit, and to plan ahead. She has reasons for her behavior whether you understand them or not. It's good you are talking about your troubles though. Problems like these are fixable. Be a man and plan for this. Don't let little things shake you up. Let her know that you appreciate her looking her best for you. Slap her ass and tell her how sexy she is when she fixes herself up for you! Lol!

Ditto


Uh Oh! We we got not one, but two guys that claim to understand women! Please do elaborate some more guys.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 5:56:17 AM EDT
Originally Posted By leadnbrass:
take so fucking long to get out of a damn car???


For the very same reason that they take so long to get out of the bathroom..........

Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:01:29 AM EDT
They are always slow it drives me freaken nuts. Especially when running errands and trying to get a pile of shit done.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:05:05 AM EDT
The sooner you just accept that they always do this and there is no changing them, the happier you will be.

Sittin' on a bench at West Town Mall
He sat down in his overalls and asked me
''You waitin' on a woman?''
I nodded yeah and said, ''How 'bout you?''
He said, ''Son since nineteen fifty-two I've been
Waitin' on a woman.''

When I picked her up for our first date
I told her I'd be there at eight
And she came down the stairs at eight-thirty
She said, ''I'm sorry that I took so long
Didn't like a thing that I tried on.''
But let me tell you son she sure looked pretty
Yeah, she'll take her time but I don't mind
Waitin' on a woman.

He said, ''The wedding took a year to plan
You talk about an anxious man, I was nervous
Waitin' on a woman.''
And then he nudged my arm like old men do
And said, ''I'll say this about the honeymoon, it was worth it
Waitin' on a woman.''

And I don't guess we've been anywhere
She hasn't made us late I swear
Sometimes she does it just 'cause she can do it
Boy it's just a fact of life
It'll be the same with your young wife
Might as well go on and get used to it
She'll take her time 'cause you don't mind
Waitin' on a woman.

I've read somewhere statistics show
The man's always the first to go
And that makes sense 'cause I know she won't be ready
So when it finally comes my time
And I get to the other side
I'll find myself a bench, if they've got any
I hope she takes her time, 'cause I don't mind
Waitin' on a woman.

Honey, take your time, cause I don't mind
Waitin' on a woman...
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:09:12 AM EDT
Because they forget how to open the car door.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:11:08 AM EDT
You need to explain the process to them. Use small words and short sentences.

Sometimes they need help. When you are getting close to where you are going, tell them.

Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:13:00 AM EDT
Trust me, not all women do this.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:17:40 AM EDT
Originally Posted By 2IDdoc:
Just a bit of advice. Not that it was asked for. hehe. Don't get upset. If you get upset you fail. If you plan for this behavior, and it doesn't bother you, you win. It's truly that simple. Sounds TOO simple I know. If she takes four hours to get ready to go out tell her how great she looks when she's done. If she makes herself pretty before going into a public venue do the same. Don't be a victim. You are a man. You plan ahead and accommodate shit like this. If you are in control of yourself and the activities of daily life she will feel confidence in you. If you get upset and rattled over little shit she will lose faith in your place as a man. This may sound sexist or whatever, but it's true. I think women are absolutely equal to men, but we have different roles. Part of a man's role is to be stable, unaffected by piddly shit, and to plan ahead. She has reasons for her behavior whether you understand them or not. It's good you are talking about your troubles though. Problems like these are fixable. Be a man and plan for this. Don't let little things shake you up. Let her know that you appreciate her looking her best for you. Slap her ass and tell her how sexy she is when she fixes herself up for you! Lol!




THIS is the answer. I'll wait a few extra minutes if it makes her feel better about herself, and if she's willing to make herself look good. No problems with that at all...
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:18:46 AM EDT

Why do women...
Because I prefer it to doing men.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:21:14 AM EDT
Originally Posted By 1903pa:
Originally Posted By LungShot:

Originally Posted By 2IDdoc:
Just a bit of advice. Not that it was asked for. hehe. Don't get upset. If you get upset you fail. If you plan for this behavior, and it doesn't bother you, you win. It's truly that simple. Sounds TOO simple I know. If she takes four hours to get ready to go out tell her how great she looks when she's done. If she makes herself pretty before going into a public venue do the same. Don't be a victim. You are a man. You plan ahead and accommodate shit like this. If you are in control of yourself and the activities of daily life she will feel confidence in you. If you get upset and rattled over little shit she will lose faith in your place as a man. This may sound sexist or whatever, but it's true. I think women are absolutely equal to men, but we have different roles. Part of a man's role is to be stable, unaffected by piddly shit, and to plan ahead. She has reasons for her behavior whether you understand them or not. It's good you are talking about your troubles though. Problems like these are fixable. Be a man and plan for this. Don't let little things shake you up. Let her know that you appreciate her looking her best for you. Slap her ass and tell her how sexy she is when she fixes herself up for you! Lol!

Ditto


Uh Oh! We we got not one, but two guys that claim to understand women! Please do elaborate some more guys.


Your attitude is smug and condescending. I explained what was happening in a situation. I never claimed to understand women. If you have a specific question you want me to try and answer ask it. Otherwise keep the attitude to yourself.
Link Posted: 9/12/2010 6:50:45 AM EDT

Originally Posted By webtaz99:
Using "why" and "women" in the same sentence = FAIL..



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