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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 8/25/2005 7:36:18 PM EDT
My wife has been a little "flighty" lately. Well tonight she told me she wanted a divorce again. We went through this back in Feb and she aggreed to see a counselor and was placed on some antidepressants. She stopped seeing the counselor and I don't know about the drugs. I was going to use the summer to setup a "new life" back home, but she seemed to be alright and things were getting back to normal. Yeah right! She's been hiding away money and taking my name off the business accounts. Then she drops this on me the first day of my getting back to work at the school!
She even called the police on me and told them I threatened her. I did tell her that if we divorced she would be in a "world of hurt."(She's diabetic, I carry the insurance, and in a divorce the business would be sold and after the debts were paid we would both end up with nothing. At least I have a job)
Looks like some lawyers are going to make some money!
Hessian-1
Link Posted: 8/25/2005 9:36:47 PM EDT
Your gonna be ok Dave. At some point things must get better eventually. Maybe its for the better, maybe things get worked out but eventually you will be happy again. Lots of people here have been through this and Im sure they'll offer support if you need it.

Cheer up and dont give up on the ultimate goal in life-happiness

youve got my number brother.
Link Posted: 8/25/2005 10:17:05 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/25/2005 10:17:37 PM EDT by Jerret]
Sorry to hear that. I guess it's time to start "losing" some possessions such as guns and other valuable things, to some trusted friends.
Link Posted: 8/25/2005 11:26:43 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Jerret:
Sorry to hear that. I guess it's time to start "losing" some possessions such as guns and other valuable things, to some trusted friends.



A BIG +1

Get all those things out of the house RIGHT NOW. All it takes is one restraining order & an overzealous judge and you'll never see those guns again. There doesn't even have to be any merit to it, just a story and your word which won't mean anything. The legal system favors the woman in this regard and you will be a "psycho with a huge arsenal".

I'm also very sorry to hear about your troubles, and having depression and medication swirled into it just makes things worse. I hope for the best for you.

Try not to let it eat you up, keep your chin up and do what you must when you must. You've always got friends here.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 3:17:04 AM EDT
If she gets a restraining order, you will be served and your firearms will be removed by the Deputy. I will not give any legal advice, but think hard about what the others have said. Remember, I am in Tiffin if it helps.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 3:34:40 AM EDT
Dave, i'm over here in allen county, you can 'sell' me any gun you want and i'll 'sell' it back to you when you get things straightened out. i'm completely honest, i'm just here to help. IM me if you want, or if there is anything else i can do. hang in there, and be strong.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 5:53:50 AM EDT
i had a friend who recently went through a divorce. she claimed to the court that he was a "GUN NUT" and the court demanded that he turn over all of his guns to the court during the proceedings. luckily he was just a bit smarter and had placed 98% of his toys with friends he could trust.

next the wife told the court that he had moved the guns out of the house so the court could not get them. the court demanded that he give them a listing of the guns that he owned. he gave them what he had at the house.

the judge declared that four guns do not make someone a "gun nut"..

Link Posted: 8/26/2005 5:54:29 AM EDT
Dave,

Sorry guy about the news. Keep up the good fight. +1 with all the advice above. If there is anything I can do let me know as well.

Ken
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 6:01:38 AM EDT
Been there, done that Hessian.

Get your stuff to safety ASAP. It's time to protect yourself and your assets as fast as possible, even if she has a change of heart again.

Remember, too, that sometimes it's all about who files the paperwork first. If divorce is inevitable (and from the sounds of her activities of late, it may be) I'd run to an attorney and file first. Then YOU might just get to kick her out, etc. etc. etc.

We're all here........
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 8:47:41 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 9:59:11 AM EDT
Sorry to hear that bud. Just remember, a brighter day will come. There is no doubt about that.


BTW, didn't you say that you took your guns out on the lake with you last weekend, you know, that trip where you realized you had a leak in the boat.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 12:26:42 PM EDT
My condolences on your situation, sir. Now, if she makes you move out of the house, take all the t.p. along with your toys/possessions. If you want/have to play dirty, call all the attorneys you can find in the yellow pages etc. for their "free" consultation. Once this is done you will be "their" client and unable to represent your estranged other due to, "conflict of interest," or so I have been told.

Good luck sir. I'm sure you will come through well in the long run.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 1:23:34 PM EDT
Major bummer.

Hope things work out in your favor.

Time to 'lose' the guns in a boating accident.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 2:19:35 PM EDT
Damn Dave, sorry to hear things aren't going well for you. Enjoyed our conversations at our house, and the Lima gunshow, as well as that "re-enactment" camp.

All I can say for advice, is be the one to take action, instead of being on the reaction side of things. It's better to be in control than to be controlled. MournSword
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 3:39:12 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/26/2005 3:39:47 PM EDT by glimmerman68]
Sorry to hear about your "situation", sounds like a little shooting is in order LD weekend, help take your mind off it for a little while. Time to turn a new leaf and enjoy yourself, do some things you've always wanted to, really helps the depression.
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 4:49:11 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/27/2005 6:19:02 AM EDT by Scooter308]
Dave,

Sorry to hear about your situation also.

If you need anything drop me an email

Scott@Cousinos-Firearms.com

Scott
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 7:48:56 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/26/2005 10:58:12 PM EDT
Hessian, my condolances and best wishes for things to work out.

I don't want to seem unsympathetic here, but this reminds me of the three tell-tale signs of an impending domestic explosion. As a veteran of several harsh guttings, I know when I'm about to be a practice dummy for sepuku when one of these three things happens under suspicious or less than friendly circumstances:

1. She gets a radical hair cut.
2. She suddenly loses weight.
3. She buys new underwear.
Link Posted: 8/27/2005 12:11:54 AM EDT
Thanks for all the support!
Hey you guys aren't half bad for a "bunch of internet idiots"(not my words guess where that came from)

I'm truely blessed to have such good "friends" some of which I have never met but you guys and gals are stepping up and offering help, support, and sometimes just "good words!"

I am trying to move on. It is hard but after long consideration I don't want to be around anyone who doesn't want me. I am confused as the person that I argued with last night was not the person I married. But I can't wish her well, she has cut me to the quick and I will never be able to trust her again. I will love again, just maybe not as deeply, or as easily. I have accepted that I will probably be screwed money wise, but life is just too damn short to put up with the crap that I've been putting up with for the past year or so! I also know that she will probably read this as she has been lurking around for the past few months on the site. If she does maybe she will return my phonecalls! She said that all she wanted was out! Well don't look now but you are pretty much out!
I am going to leave for NC shortly. I don't know if I'm comming back monday to go to work or not. I'm sure that I can find suitable work equal to or probably better than what I'm doing up here. I did not want this, It was forced on me. Now let the chips fall where they may.
Hessian-1(Sad but optimistic!)
Link Posted: 8/27/2005 7:09:57 AM EDT
Dave,

Sorry to hear about your troubles. I would delete this thread, keeping in mind the advice that has been given.

Good luck!

Darren
Link Posted: 8/27/2005 7:17:30 AM EDT
Dave, I don't know the details of your business, employement, property, etc., but if you truly don't plan on being back to Ohio, might want to consider liquidating everything you can (that you aren't taking with you) without losing your butt. You don't know what might happen while you are gone, especially if not everyone is leaving Ohio....

DON'T figure it will be just as it was, and businesses can fall apart quickly. Things to think about I guess. MournSword
Link Posted: 8/27/2005 4:17:04 PM EDT
This sounds wat too close to what I went through and what a friend of mine is currently going through.

The best advice I can give you is to get a lawyer and do everything he tells you to. Just walk away and let hi handle the details. I know it isn't easy, but unless you want to go through this every six months or so, it's the way it has to be.

I never wanted to be divorced, but the constant mental anguish was threatening my job, my future, my health, and my sanity.

It took a while, but I am doing a hell of a lot better than I was then.

Link Posted: 8/27/2005 5:35:59 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Red-Leg:
Dave,

I would delete this thread, keeping in mind the advice that has been given.




All things considered, I'd second that.

Dave,
I don't normally state opinions on other folks personal situations, but I'll offer this:

By posting here, knowing that your wife will be reading, will only "fuel the fire" so to speak.
If indeed the relationship is over, it's best that you and her find a way to end it peacefully and respectfully with each other.
Now , for you and her, it's a time for reflection of the past , what it meant to each of you, consideration what the future holds for both of you, and especially, a time to let bygones be bygones.

If you both insist on parting ways forever, don't destroy each other in the process. The only people that will benefit will be the attorneys, and Old Aunt "somebody", that always sez "I tole ya it woodn't werk out 'tween them two."

Now is a time for "cooler heads to prevail". Both of you need to be that. Just that. Cool headed.
Work on "how to work it all out" rather than "how to get even".
I don't know either of you all that well, but I'm aware of enough to know that both of you have apparently built or worked on a relationship/business/goal/dream together. All that didn't happen all by itself.

Don't let your anger and frustrations with each other now destroy the results your past efforts, or the potential of your individual futures.
Good luck to you both. I wish you the best.

John

<­BR>
Link Posted: 8/29/2005 4:05:07 AM EDT
Dave,

Put name on guns.
Put guns in vehicle.
Drive out of town on 37.
Put in rack in one of my trailers.

Email me for phone number.
Link Posted: 8/29/2005 3:58:25 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JEC:

Originally Posted By Red-Leg:
Dave,

I would delete this thread, keeping in mind the advice that has been given.




All things considered, I'd second that.

Dave,
I don't normally state opinions on other folks personal situations, but I'll offer this:

By posting here, knowing that your wife will be reading, will only "fuel the fire" so to speak.
If indeed the relationship is over, it's best that you and her find a way to end it peacefully and respectfully with each other.
Now , for you and her, it's a time for reflection of the past , what it meant to each of you, consideration what the future holds for both of you, and especially, a time to let bygones be bygones.

If you both insist on parting ways forever, don't destroy each other in the process. The only people that will benefit will be the attorneys, and Old Aunt "somebody", that always sez "I tole ya it woodn't werk out 'tween them two."

Now is a time for "cooler heads to prevail". Both of you need to be that. Just that. Cool headed.
Work on "how to work it all out" rather than "how to get even".
I don't know either of you all that well, but I'm aware of enough to know that both of you have apparently built or worked on a relationship/business/goal/dream together. All that didn't happen all by itself.

Don't let your anger and frustrations with each other now destroy the results your past efforts, or the potential of your individual futures.
Good luck to you both. I wish you the best.

John

Thanks to all! An update.

We are speaking and I am trying to end it civilly. I think it's for the best and I'm looking forward to starting a new life. I really don't want the divorce but "it takes two." I'll be ok. I only hope that she will be. She has helped me a lot over the past 15 years and we have had some good times, as well as some bad. I think "the next time" I'll pay more particular attention to us having more similar likes and values. I am in NC and am trying to rebuild my life. I'll try to make the labor day shoot at least for a day on my way back down south with another load of belongings.
I am, Hessian-1(and I'll be alright!)


Link Posted: 8/29/2005 5:12:34 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Hessian-1:


Thanks to all! An update.

We are speaking and I am trying to end it civilly. I think it's for the best and I'm looking forward to starting a new life. I really don't want the divorce but "it takes two." I'll be ok. I only hope that she will be. She has helped me a lot over the past 15 years and we have had some good times, as well as some bad. I think "the next time" I'll pay more particular attention to us having more similar likes and values. I am in NC and am trying to rebuild my life. I'll try to make the labor day shoot at least for a day on my way back down south with another load of belongings.
I am, Hessian-1(and I'll be alright!)





Im glad the storm subsided. I hope to see you there Dave and I'll be sure to keep some leghumper on the ice just for you
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