Umm...
Okee dokee. So early this morning, a funny triangular shaped thingy appears on the northern horizion at the 30 degree area. It's definitely hovering there, not moving... Glowing. Some people claim there's more than one.
The local Homeland Security folks take notice, Luke Air Force Base gets a call, and the theme song from the X-Files is dusted off and replayed over and over again on every station in the Valley. Yes, this creates what could be termed as a "stir" in the area.
Of course, it turned out to be just a low-flying weather balloon.
As many of you might remember from my Wal-Mart story, I live in a "less" educated, rural area. As is normal for a Friday, I got going to work and stopped at the local AM/PM for gas. Two men were sitting near the coffee machine discussing the day's event. The first man was an older gentleman, dressed in paint-splattered bib overalls and a coffee stained 'wife beater' shirt. What little hair he had was done in a sloppy, greasy "combover." His buddy 'Boomer' had three or four teeth in various stages of decay but was dressed in cleaner overalls but no shirt-- this had the unfortunate effect of showing a relatively hairy chest with grotesque hairy nipples. Entering the store to pay, I heard the following exchange:
Man #1: BOOMER! Didja see that UFO up in ta sky?"
Boomer: "Sure 'nuff did... My brother done says its a "weather balloon." I ain't never heard of no "weather balloon."
Man #1: "Yeah, I heard that on the transciever this morn. Tell ya what, I don't believe it. Ya just can't trust no gub'mint radio to tell ya the truth!"
Store Clerk: I don't trust the SECULAR PRESS no how!"
Boomer and Man #1: (Chorus of "Uh huh, yup, etc.")
Boomer: "I think we got visitors no matter what no radio says."
Man #1: "Tell ya what, Boomer... I got ta thinkin'... If that there object be aliens, that means they're smart enough to build a spaceship to come visit. Why in the hill (Mike's commentary: Yes, he said "hill.") couldn't they be makin' their spaceship to be lookin' like a weather balloon?
Boomer: "Oooh, now THAT'S something-- I done seen some cloakin' dee-vice like that on the TV once..."
.....
The conversation continued on further, but I felt the need to pay up quickly and leave. Can't quite explain why-- must have been the warnings from my tinfoil hat about mind control devices being in use...
...or was that just the microwave beeping from Boomer's burrito?
Maybe moving west into civiliation wasn't such a horrible course of action.....
Mike