If he is being deployed, he smells like of USCG. That means his P229R-DAK is in .40S&W. The Freeds X-Grips that TG Supply is selling wont help him, because they are for 9mm.
Houge wood grips are very fat, but I wouldnt pay that for my duty gun. Get a set of Houge, rubber grip panels, the ones without finger grooves. In stall them. Then get a Houge Handall, which is a slip over rubber grip that adds finger grooves. This combo should make you P229 extra fatty in the grip dept.
As for length, there's only one thing you can do that I know of. Try and get some SIG Target P229 mag plates. They added a silver finger groove. They are expensive as hell though. You might look to see what Europe has to offer for lengthening your grip. Europe has all kinds of cool shit for SIGs we cant get here. Find out what your overseas postal address is, and if you find something, have it sent there to greet you.
You might even tell you boss the problem you're having, maybe they can scrounge up an old M9, and some mags.