Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
Member Login
Site Notices
9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 12/21/2005 11:11:27 AM EDT
if Steven Seagal and Chuck Norris got into a heated argument on who was the better fighter at the local bar, who do you think would win the fight? if both guys were in their prime?

Seagal or Norris?



Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:11:51 AM EDT
Seagal.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:11:53 AM EDT
Chuck would be a dead man.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:13:13 AM EDT
SS, hands down.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:13:29 AM EDT
Have you seen Segal lately? He is a fat fuck trying to sell his worthless country music albums. He cannot even lift his leg to fart let alone try and block a roundhouse kick.

No contest...Chuck kicks his ass hands down.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:13:56 AM EDT
Are you kidding, segal is a real martial arts master.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:14:14 AM EDT
Chuck, easily.

How many times has Seagal actually competed and become World Champion at anything?
He can't even run like a man, and he's using body doubles for everything but walking nowadays.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:14:51 AM EDT
He said "in their prime", not now.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:15:24 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/21/2005 11:15:41 AM EDT by macman37]
The world would be rocked to its very core. Tsunamis like the Dec. 26th one on an hourly basis.

In short,

ARMAGEDDON
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:15:45 AM EDT
Wouldn't want to mess with either of them, but IMHO, Seagal would prevail.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:17:21 AM EDT
What is it that seagal is a master in, Aikido?

Yeah, it takes a special kind of asshole to brag about being humble.

Norris hands down.


BOW TO YOUR SENSEI!

You think anyone wants to take a roundhouse kick when I'm wearing these bad-boys?
Forget about it.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:18:13 AM EDT

Originally Posted By dvr9:
Have you seen Segal lately? He is a fat fuck trying to sell his worthless country music albums. He cannot even lift his leg to fart let alone try and block a roundhouse kick.

No contest...Chuck kicks his ass hands down.



He does that so the pressure can build up and if Chuck Norris tried anything the explosion will kill Chuck and every living thing around him
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:18:24 AM EDT

Originally Posted By dvr9:
Have you seen Segal lately? He is a fat fuck trying to sell his worthless country music albums. He cannot even lift his leg to fart let alone try and block a roundhouse kick.

No contest...Chuck kicks his ass hands down.



Hell Segal would still win...Chuck is a chump. I'm pretty sure I could take him out.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:18:35 AM EDT

Originally Posted By absit:
He said "in their prime", not now.



Regardless, Segal is a movie martial artist. He has skills, but his craft is best practiced on celluloid. Chuck has felt the pain of competition and come out on top, several times.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:18:57 AM EDT
seagal carries a custom .45acp in real life, try taking a roundhouse kick from a 230 gr piece of lead!
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:19:16 AM EDT
Not if Chuck had his Mini-Uzi and his rocket-launching motorcycle...
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:19:23 AM EDT
Chuck would own Seagal!!
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:19:32 AM EDT

Originally Posted By mjohn3006:

Originally Posted By dvr9:
Have you seen Segal lately? He is a fat fuck trying to sell his worthless country music albums. He cannot even lift his leg to fart let alone try and block a roundhouse kick.

No contest...Chuck kicks his ass hands down.



He does that so the pressure can build up and if Chuck Norris tried anything the explosion will kill Chuck and every living thing around him



You musn't tell everybody about the Akido secret moves!
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:20:08 AM EDT
Segal would be pregnant.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:21:50 AM EDT
Now if it was Walker Texas Ranger -vs- Segal, then Chuck might win.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:23:31 AM EDT
This is the Planet.



This is the toughest SOB to ever walk the planet.


Any questions?
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:23:44 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/21/2005 11:27:18 AM EDT by Sukebe]
A member recently related an eye witness account of a meeting between Chuck Norris and Steven Segal. IIRC, it went something like this;

Chuck Norris walked into a bar with an alligator under his arm
The bartender said, You can't bring an alligator in here.
Chuck Norris replied, this is a special alligator
The bartender asked, what's so special about it?
Chuck Norris picked up a bottle off the bar, smashed it over the alligators head, shoves his cock in the alligators mouth and the gator started sucking
About this time, Steven Segal, who had been sitting at the end of the bar walked up and starred in amazment.
Chuck Norris looked at Segal and asked, Do you want to give it a try?
Segal replied, sure, just don't hit me with a bottle.
Norris then called Segal a fag and roundhouse kicked him into orbit.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:26:54 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Sukebe:
A member recently related an eye witness account of a meeting between Chuck Norris and Steven Segal. IIRC, it went something like this;

Chuck Norris walked into a bar with an alligator under his arm
The bartender said, You can't bring an alligator in here.
Chuck Norris replied, this is a special alligator
The bartender asked, what's so special about it?
Chuck Norris picked up a bottle off the bar, smashed it over the alligators head, shoves his cock in the alligators mouth and the gator started sucking
About this time, Steven Segal, who had been sitting at the end of the bar walked up and starred in amazment.
Chuck Norris looked at Segal and asked, Do you want to give it a try?
Segal replied, sure, just don't hit me with a bottle.



Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:28:01 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/21/2005 11:30:21 AM EDT by mjohn3006]
Suddenly an urge to watch Firewalker.

Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:30:35 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/21/2005 11:31:56 AM EDT by AMZ]
Geritol vitamins , and colostamy bags... everywhere.

Niether one, actually , Bruce Willis would win.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:50:56 AM EDT
Chuck Norris, hands down!

-James
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:52:41 AM EDT
chuck was a Marine right?
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:53:28 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1911greg:
chuck was a Marine right?



Not sure, however he rescued a lot of Vietnam POW's.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:56:24 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1911greg:
chuck was a Marine right?



He was Air Force.
That gave him plenty of time to learn and practice MA.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:56:24 AM EDT
win or lose Seagal will still look funny running
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 11:59:41 AM EDT
Chuck hands down.
Link Posted: 12/21/2005 12:02:45 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Stealth:
Segal would be pregnant.





+1

Link Posted: 12/21/2005 12:03:22 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/21/2005 12:03:22 PM EDT by tc6969]
We have already locked over 50 Chuck threads. Lets give it a rest OK?
Top Top