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Posted: 7/19/2002 6:46:38 AM EDT
[#1]
Sorry about your friend, and best wishes for his family. That sucks. I have never seen how anyone could think suicide is a solution to personal problems.
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Posted: 7/19/2002 6:54:14 AM EDT
[#2]
Quoted: Sorry about your friend, and best wishes for his family. That sucks. I have never seen how anyone could think suicide is a solution to personal problems. It's a great solution for personal problems. BANG! You've got not more problems. Unfortunately you didn't eliminate them, you just dumped them on your family and friends.[:(] |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 6:55:05 AM EDT
[#3]
Sorry to hear that, apollojay. Best wishes to the family, particularly his kids.
Quoted: I have never seen how anyone could think suicide is a solution to personal problems. Not to sound condescending, but quite frankly it's because you haven't been there. When you find yourself pushed to the edge of depression, suicide looks and feels like the answer. You and I both know it isn't, but you aren't thinking that way when you are depressed and suicidal. the_reject |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 7:32:24 AM EDT
[#4]
It's sad that he chose a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I've lost two lifelong friends to suicide and know firsthand the pain you and his family suffer. My condolences. |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 7:59:33 AM EDT
[#5]
KB - it is an act borne of desperation.
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Posted: 7/19/2002 8:06:24 AM EDT
[#6]
Sorry to hear about your friend - and I feel very sorry for his kids.
Eric |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 8:21:26 AM EDT
[#7]
Sorry to hear that. Are you mad yet?
In a two year time span two people I knew did it. In each case infant children were left without fathers. I mourned the loss of my friends for only a short time. After that my contempt for what they did to those kids filled me with rage. I think being there for your kids should be reason enough to keep going. Suicide is the single most selfish act a human can perform. Keep your head up. Do what you can for those that were left behind. Sorry DC1 |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 9:57:51 AM EDT
[#8]
thanks everyone. other than that i dont know what to say.
-jay |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 10:15:05 AM EDT
[#9]
the worst part is he leaves behind 2 kids, 10 and 12. Damn selfish bastard.... |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 10:22:03 AM EDT
[#10]
Quoted: the worst part is he leaves behind 2 kids, 10 and 12. Damn selfish bastard.... Ditto!! No concern for those he should and maybe have loved. I know it is hard for you, but move on to helping the family. A good friend of mine did this several years back. Once his wife recovered from the shock, she was mad as hell. She is remarried and her children call someone else father. He rest in her memories, but she and the kids moved on. Do for his family what he could or did not do. |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 10:23:03 AM EDT
[#11]
He wasn't being selfish in his mind. Most likely he saw himself as the root of a problem and didn't see anyway out but to end it. He probably thought his death would actually be a help to those he has left behind.
It makes no logical sense except to those that reach that point. Once you're there, logic takes no part in the decision. Apollojay, you have my sympathy. And the typical feeling in this situation, depending on how close you were to this person, is to somehow blame yourself for not seeing something or not stopping the suicide. Don't do that. It's almost never true and blaming yourself doesn't help anyone. |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 10:33:53 AM EDT
[#12]
He wasn't being selfish in his mind. Most likely he saw himself as the root of a problem and didn't see anyway out but to end it. He probably thought his death would actually be a help to those he has left behind. I disagree....Killing yourself is not the solution. Why the children have to suffer? He can do better by straighten himself out and make amend.... Or at least give time to heal the wound. Give the children chance to grow up and know their father. |
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Posted: 7/19/2002 10:48:22 AM EDT
[#13]
Sorry for your loss. I've been in your shoes and I can tell you that there are always unanswered questions and guilt feelings like you could have done something, and you're always thinking back, looking for signs that this was coming. Don't blame yourself. Sometimes suicidal people show signs, but most of the time they do not.
AR_Rifle, I agree that offing yourself isn't the solution, and causes more problems than it solves, but [i]he[/i] though it was the solution, and I think that was bastiat's point. |
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