help me think of a bumper sticker

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - help me think of a bumper sticker

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:08:53 PM EDT

I want to think of a bumper sticker slogan that will make tail-gaters fear for their lives without drawing the attention of law enforcement? Any ideas? TAILGATERS WILL BE SHOT would probably get me in trouble.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:13:56 PM EDT

[#1]

Just keep a handful of marbles with you and toss them out the window when tailgated...

Works best if you ride a motorcycle.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:15:09 PM EDT

[#2]

I usually just hit the brakes --- I like the marble idea.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:20:53 PM EDT

[#3]

How about: "Road Rage: Let's Play"

the_reject

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:21:35 PM EDT

[#4]

I always like the stickers that kinda went like this: IF YOU CAN READ THIS YOU'VE PUT YOUR LIFE IN PERIL.

Anyway you understand the idea.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:25:51 PM EDT

[#5]

I always liked this one:

[center][size=1]If you get any closer,
I'll flip a booger on your windshield![/size=1][/center]

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:33:26 PM EDT

[#6]

Brake lights work better than bumper stickers!

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:38:11 PM EDT

[#7]

UNLESS YOU ARE A HEMMAROID GET OFF MY ASS !!!!!!!!

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:40:26 PM EDT

[#8]

Yeah, but I'd use the break lights so often that eventually someone will decide to follow me off the highway and have a "discussion". Then I'll be forced to hit someone with the baseball bat I keep on the passenger seat floor.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:41:45 PM EDT

[#9]

Btw, I consider 25 feet to be tailgating at highway speeds.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:45:52 PM EDT

[#10]

This may not get the message across to a tailgater but they may end up laughing so hard that they'll lose control of their vehicle.... I know I almost did.

"I may not be Mr. Right.... but I'll f^ck you until he comes along."

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:47:47 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
This may not get the message across to a tailgater but they may end up laughing so hard that they'll lose control of their vehicle.... I know I almost did.

"I may not be Mr. Right.... but I'll f^ck you until he comes along."

View Quote

BBBBBWWWWWHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!! LMFAO!!!!

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:49:45 PM EDT

[#12]

Nice one. I thought about rigging up a sign in the back window with a hinge and a cord so I could yank on the cord and raise up a sign saying "Back Off Mother Fucker", and then drop i back down again.

Posted: 6/11/2002 3:53:59 PM EDT

[#13]

KEEP HONKING! I'M RELOADING!

GOD..GUNS..AND GUT'S MADE AMERICA FREE!

IF GUNS ARE OUTLAWED...
ONLY OUTLAWS WILL HAVE GUNS!

Posted: 6/11/2002 4:41:31 PM EDT

[#14]

Get a rear window washer.

Fill it with whatever vile stuff you have laying around your shop/kitchen/garbage/outhouse....

Turn the nozzle to spray... backwards.

Really pisses people off.

Of course just using your front window washer for a few seconds will make them back off as well. But the other way is more fun and satisfying.

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:01:17 PM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
Get a rear window washer.

Fill it with whatever vile stuff you have laying around your shop/kitchen/garbage/outhouse....

Turn the nozzle to spray... backwards.

Really pisses people off.

Of course just using your front window washer for a few seconds will make them back off as well. But the other way is more fun and satisfying.

View Quote

This gets my vote for the best idea. I'm heading out to the junkyard this weekend to see if I can scrape together a system. Thank you.
[beer]

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:04:14 PM EDT

[#16]

I just made these two up (at least, I have never seen them before)

This is a two-liner with two different font sizes (noted in parentheses):

If you can read this line (in teeny, tiny letters)
THEN BACK THE HELL OFF (in large bold letters)

or...

You're a Gambler, I'm Bi-Polar.
Well...do you feel lucky punk?

or...

All your base are belong to us!

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:14:24 PM EDT

[#17]

How about:

"Tailgating Is For Fags"

Of course this will only work on guys.

One of my personal favorites is to start hocking lugeys out the window and tossing whatever trash happens to be in your car (Mcdonalds wrappers, empty cans) at them. That usually gets their attention. And if they decide to get uppity about it, just nail their car with your half empty can of beer when they get along side you. They usually get the freakin point. If I had a doller for all the assholes on the road I've almost gone to jail over.......

Ah yes, road rage. It is a fine art.

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:21:19 PM EDT

[#18]

This is a gold mine. I need a bumper sticker, a retractible f-off rear window sign, a rearward facing spray nozzle, a sack of marbles, and a baseball bat. Yee haw. My car is also banged to hell already, so liberal application of the breaks can be the final solution.

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:22:13 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
Just keep a handful of marbles with you and toss them out the window when tailgated...

Works best if you ride a motorcycle.

View Quote

I use ball bearings. [{:)] AB

Posted: 6/11/2002 5:35:41 PM EDT

[#20]

Well,if'n you got a stick on the floor,if you lift the rubber seal, you can usually see the ground,or rusted out floorboards.So you covertly just start unloading crap(rocks,nuts,bolts'nsuch) till they get the idea.

Posted: 6/11/2002 6:10:52 PM EDT

[#21]

This gives me a great idea.

I drive a pickup with a trailer hitch (always attached) for "tailgater defense" purposes.

I need a sign that raises/lowers that says, "BACK OFF BEFORE I STICK A TRAILER HITCH THROUGH YOUR RADIATOR!!!"

Posted: 6/11/2002 6:13:43 PM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
This gives me a great idea.

I drive a pickup with a trailer hitch (always attached) for "tailgater defense" purposes.

I need a sign that raises/lowers that says, "BACK OFF BEFORE I STICK A TRAILER HITCH THROUGH YOUR RADIATOR!!!"

View Quote

Is it a receiver hitch? You could rig up a foot long spike to go in it.

Posted: 6/11/2002 6:39:54 PM EDT

[#23]

Check out the bumper sticker of the '00's.

Dang, that just doesn't look/sound right...the aught's?!?

[url]http://www.gadgets.co.uk/estika.html[/url]

ByteTheBullet (-:

Posted: 6/11/2002 6:44:14 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:

Check out the bumper sticker of the '00's.

Dang, that just doesn't look/sound right...the aught's?!?

[url]http://www.gadgets.co.uk/estika.html[/url]

ByteTheBullet (-:

View Quote

"If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you"

Posted: 6/11/2002 6:55:47 PM EDT

[#25]

Try this one,

IF YOU CAN READ THIS I WILL SHOOT YOU!

Most cops are not that smart so you should be ok[;)]

Posted: 6/11/2002 9:10:11 PM EDT

[#26]

small print "if you can read this your to fucking close"

Posted: 6/12/2002 7:19:28 AM EDT

[#27]

Almost OT:

[img]http://boards.rennlist.com/upload/ferretsmarter.jpg[/img]

Posted: 6/12/2002 7:54:00 AM EDT

[#28]

in not so bold letters,

[size=4]IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE IN RANGE[/size=4]

right next to the

Warning: Driver only carries $20 in ammunition

kinda like this:

[img]http://65.165.2.251/signs/previews/061213450154.jpg[/img]

Posted: 6/12/2002 10:56:44 AM EDT

[#29]

Right next to this one:

[img]http://65.165.2.251/signs/previews/061213471697.jpg[/img]

or one like this

[img]http://65.165.2.251/signs/previews/061213503710.jpg[/img]

Posted: 6/12/2002 11:40:41 AM EDT

[#30]

M1: I REALLY like that one. Shit, man, have it printed up and sell it at the gun shows. The one I have on the rear bumper of my truck reads:
"THE GUN IN THE DRIVER'S HAND IS LARGER THAN IT APPEARS"
On several occasions I've had LEOs creep up close enough behind me to read it while we're sitting in traffic. They never fail to laugh or chuckle. It's kinda nice to live in a state that's not anti-gun whacko. [pistol]

Posted: 6/12/2002 11:59:42 AM EDT

[#31]

"The voices in my head told me to stay home and clean the guns" right next to, "I love nothing"

Posted: 6/12/2002 12:08:41 PM EDT

[#32]

I tailgate anybody thats driving too slow and I'm about ready to pass.

Posted: 6/12/2002 4:01:47 PM EDT

[#33]

Here ya go:
FIREFIGHTERS FIND THEM HOT AND LEAVE EM WET

ah the hell with it....j/k
try this one:
Don't piss me off. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

Posted: 6/12/2002 5:27:05 PM EDT

[#34]

Practice Safe Sex:Go Fuck Yourself.

Posted: 6/12/2002 5:34:09 PM EDT

[#35]

why have a sticker when you can just downshift violenty?

Posted: 6/12/2002 5:45:08 PM EDT

[#36]

How about just moving back to the right and letting the guy pass?
Nothing more aggravating than those left-lane cruisers.
The real bumper sticker needs to be on the front bumper, printed backwards, reminding everyone "Slower Traffic Keep Right".