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Posted: 4/20/2007 6:53:18 AM EDT
So a friend and I were were Bullshitin about what are the ultimate "Manly" must have items:

WD-40
Duct Tape
Chainsaw
Work Boots
1911
Guiness from a Kegerator
Carb Cleaner
An Axe
CB Radio
460cc Driver
Internet Porn
Zippo
Tool Belt
Motor Trend Subscription
Soft Toiler paper.........

please feel free to add yours.......
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 6:56:16 AM EDT
A Plunger
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 6:59:27 AM EDT
fuggin' STOGIE
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:00:26 AM EDT
emery cloth
grindstone
computer (non-Mac)
quality Scotch
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:01:14 AM EDT
sledge hammer
Knife
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:01:28 AM EDT
A woman in your life.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:02:57 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:04:57 AM EDT by andrew]
A hydrant wrench...a hose spanner, a sharp knife. That's all a Manly Man needs

Oh, and a full SCBA bottle
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:03:13 AM EDT
bourbon
m1 garand
flannel shirt
3 day beard
a rwd 4x4 capable vehicle
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:04:49 AM EDT

Originally Posted By thedoctors308:
A woman in your life.


overrated

+2 on the plunger
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:04:58 AM EDT
A man doesn't need porn (unless he's not able to get to his woman).

Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:05:00 AM EDT
A rifle chambered in the single greatest round known to man: the venerable .30-06.

My choice is the M1 Garand.

PS You must also possess a penis and testicles. Preferably your own.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:05:32 AM EDT
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids for resulting cuts
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:07:37 AM EDT

Originally Posted By cruze5:

Originally Posted By thedoctors308:
A woman in your life.


overrated

+2 on the plunger



So, you're saying you use the plunger in place of the woman?
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:10:03 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:11:04 AM EDT by Bubbatheredneck]
Pickup truck
fixed blade knife that is NOT kept in the kitchen

Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:10:40 AM EDT
...a penis...
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:11:03 AM EDT
Good scars, and the stories to go with them.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:12:35 AM EDT
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:14:35 AM EDT
His OWN opinion
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:15:05 AM EDT
What?! No man purse?!

Oakleys or Wile-Xs (good shooting glasses)
Vice Grips
Multitool
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:15:26 AM EDT
My additions:

Flares - Because they are so fucking cool. Extra points if you steal them from a cop's trunk.

Tap Beer, in your house.

Beer glasses, not plastic cups.

Air tools. Impact wrench, ratchet, sander/grinder and a nail gun.

Generator.



Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:16:01 AM EDT

Originally Posted By macman37:
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids for resulting cuts


Dude, real men use duct tape.

Some of the guys in the shop use the 3M hi-tack masking tape.

Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:16:29 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:17:31 AM EDT by SubnetMask]

Originally Posted By nick1983:
So a friend and I were were Bullshitin about what are the ultimate "Manly" must have items:

WD-40
Duct Tape
Chainsaw
Work Boots
1911
Guiness from a Kegerator Real men brew their own.
Carb Cleaner
An Axe
CB Radio
460cc Driver
Internet Porn
Zippo
Tool Belt
Motor Trend Subscription Motor Trend is for pussies that obsess over cup holders. A real man busts his knuckles laying in a puddle of motor oil reading Car Craft.
Soft Toiler paper......... A real man uses whatever's available. Carpet remnants work in a pinch.

please feel free to add yours.......
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:18:29 AM EDT

Originally Posted By nick1983:
A Plunger


A Pre-Ban High Flow toilet.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:19:18 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 338winmag:

Originally Posted By macman37:
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids for resulting cuts


Dude, real men use duct tape.

Some of the guys in the shop use the 3M hi-tack masking tape.



Well I use band-aids. And I'm not turning in my man card.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:20:07 AM EDT

Originally Posted By geeze:

Originally Posted By nick1983:
A Plunger


A Pre-Ban High Flow toilet.


+1. Manly shits require a preban.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:21:57 AM EDT

Originally Posted By macman37:
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids Duct tape for resulting cuts



Fixed.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:22:00 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:24:03 AM EDT by RoyDamnMercer]
According to the OP's guidelines, I'm 8/15th manly man.

(I would drop the Motor Trend and say Girly magazines in the Crapper, that your wife doesn't say shit about!)...that would bump me up a notch.



roy d...hey, that's better than 50%
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:22:26 AM EDT
4x4
Chain (tow strap)(s)
tools(the bigger the better)
speargun(s)
BBQ grill
welder
tac light
Ka-Bar
fuses
power tools
Old BDUs

Invisiblesoul
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:23:43 AM EDT

Originally Posted By brentwal:
His OWN opinion


That's a good one

Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:25:30 AM EDT

Originally Posted By JCKnife:
A man doesn't need porn (unless he's not able to get to his woman).



A real man's wife renews her forgetful husband's Playboy subscription.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:28:37 AM EDT
If you have a woman, you need to make sure that woman doesn't have your balls in a jar that SHE keeps in a drawer that she occasionally lets you look at...Be a MAN.

If you are a man you must have:

a hobby that involves the outdoors: shooting, hunting, fishing, etc. Model Trains does not meet this criteria by itself. only exception is if you are quadrapeligic, then you should at least volunteer to be 3rd base or an out of bounds marker for the local kids.

You need at the very least one firearm that you are very confident with, and that has at the very least 100 rounds of ammo for on hand at any given time. More firearms is not necessarily better if you are teh suck with them. "I dont fear the man that has 10,000 rifles that he has shot once, I fear the man with one rifle that he has shot 10,000 times"

You need to know how to take a punch and how to punch back. To many "men" ascribe to the no violence under any circumstances pussified BS

You need to know that it is ok to let a few people into your heart. You should love someone that loves you. It doesn't make you a wussie to love someone, a daugther or son, father or mother, wife or girlfriend.

You need to be on good terms with your maker. This is important if all else fails.

You have to be willing to stand up for something; your family, your rights, or just a cause like raising money for cancer or something. Do something besides go to work, watch TV, go online, and go shopping.

Their are more, but life beckons.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:29:21 AM EDT
Horse
welder
M1A
Mauser
+++++1000­00000000000000000000 on the Guinness
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:30:32 AM EDT

Originally Posted By chooper:

Originally Posted By cruze5:

Originally Posted By thedoctors308:
A woman in your life.


overrated

+2 on the plunger



So, you're saying you use the plunger in place of the woman?


ok well in that case can i add a vacuum cleaner as well ??
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:31:43 AM EDT

Originally Posted By macman37:

Originally Posted By 338winmag:

Originally Posted By macman37:
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids for resulting cuts


Dude, real men use duct tape.

Some of the guys in the shop use the 3M hi-tack masking tape.



Well I use band-aids. And I'm not turning in my man card.


Is it unmanly to use Spiderman and Sponge bob squarepants band aids?

(I only ask, because I got this friend....)
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:31:44 AM EDT
A Garand
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:32:42 AM EDT
A Hemi.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:32:48 AM EDT
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:33:10 AM EDT
a large mule
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:33:58 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:34:25 AM EDT by SubnetMask]

Originally Posted By Cabezaverde:
A Hemi.


A real man builds up a 440. Hemi's cost too much.

ETA: And a real man knows that the current abortion is NOT a real Hemi.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:34:56 AM EDT
At least one motorcycle
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:35:05 AM EDT

Originally Posted By geeze:

Originally Posted By macman37:

Originally Posted By 338winmag:

Originally Posted By macman37:
Pocketknife/knives

Band-Aids for resulting cuts


Dude, real men use duct tape.

Some of the guys in the shop use the 3M hi-tack masking tape.



Well I use band-aids. And I'm not turning in my man card.


Is it unmanly to use Spiderman and Sponge bob squarepants band aids?

(I only ask, because I got this friend....)


If that's all you have because you

1: hurt yourself doing manly things and

2: only have those band-aids because of a manly deed you did with your wife, resulting in children of an age that would appreciate those characters on the band-aids, you are OK.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:35:37 AM EDT
OH I forgot one: An Arfcom membership.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:37:43 AM EDT
A John Deere hat.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:38:38 AM EDT

Originally Posted By SubnetMask:

Originally Posted By JCKnife:
A man doesn't need porn (unless he's not able to get to his woman).



A real man's wife renews her forgetful husband's Playboy subscription.


Oh, see there is your problem, Playboy isn't porn. It's in the same league as Maxum or FHM...


Man list? A .308 rifle battle or bolt.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:38:45 AM EDT
My list:

35" TV or larger
34 inch waist or larger
33-1/3 records in the man room
Less than 32 teeth
More than 31 pounds heavier than your wife
30 round magazines
29 inch tires on your 4x4
28 ounce Estwing Hammer
27 hairs in shower stall
26 hairs on the toilet rim
25 rifles stuffed in a 20 rifle safe
24 beers in the fridge
23 beer cans in the trash (one in your hand)
22 caliber rifle for your kid
21 years or older



roy d....now I macho cheeze flavored manly man
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:39:00 AM EDT
M44

A real man always has the option to flash fry and skewer his enemy.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:44:33 AM EDT
A melted/cracked/bent internal engine component
A set of good socket wrenches
A stud-finder
A torque wrench
A hydraulic jack
A comfortable arm chair
A (blackened by use) wet stone
An old, well-broken-in baseball glove
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:46:25 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:49:04 AM EDT by gr8outdrsmn]
height=8
Originally Posted By nick1983:
A Plunger


A real man would just use his screw driver, swirl it around, and flush it down, haha.

Just think, now your 10-in-1 screw driver becomes an 11-in-1.
Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:46:49 AM EDT
a sense of humor in the face of adversity.

A digital multimeter.

A compass.

A log splitting maul.

A pee-vee.

A pickaxe.

A first aid kit (To give aid and comfort to large breasted women with rug burns, of course.)



Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:46:53 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/20/2007 7:48:14 AM EDT by Cypher214]
Tactical Tweezers for plucking your eyebrows.

Beard trimmer to keep the pubes nice and neat.

Some boot-cut designer jeans and a casual button-down shirt.

Hair gel.

Fingernail trimmer and file.

Foaming facial cleanser.

Moisturizer.

That is... if you want to get the ladies on the higher end of the hotness scale. Trick is, you have to dress and groom yourself just SLIGHTLY metro... but still have the manly attitude. You have to do shit like hunt, shoot stuff, blow shit up, know about cars, build stuff with wood, fuck like a pro, and ACT like a man's man. All the "manly" stuff in the world won't replace attitude. If you own guns, duct tape, power tools, and porn it won't help you much if you live in mom's basement and act like a pussy.

My daily dress tends to leave me looking similar to this:







Link Posted: 4/20/2007 7:49:30 AM EDT
pool player as well ?


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