I'm not making it up!  

She had an electrical contractor over today to install some canned lights in her house - but she had bought these fancy-schmancy 4-inch canned lights herself, with integral transformers (or something like that), that worked really well for the application she need.  Apparently, they were quite unusual, and really cool, and the contractor thought they were awesome.

So, fortunately I did not need to drive 350 miles to kick his ass.  

You know you guys should really move in together.

Quoted: I'm not making it up!   She had an electrical contractor over today to install some canned lights in her house - but she had bought these fancy-schmancy 4-inch canned lights herself, with integral transformers (or something like that), that worked really well for the application she need.  Apparently, they were quite unusual, and really cool, and the contractor thought they were awesome. So, fortunately I did not need to drive 350 miles to kick his ass.

Good thing, I bet an asskicking is hell in those wooden shoes.

Quoted: Quoted: I'm not making it up!   She had an electrical contractor over today to install some canned lights in her house - but she had bought these fancy-schmancy 4-inch canned lights herself, with integral transformers (or something like that), that worked really well for the application she need.  Apparently, they were quite unusual, and really cool, and the contractor thought they were awesome. So, fortunately I did not need to drive 350 miles to kick his ass.   Good thing, I bet an asskicking is hell in those wooden shoes.

Splinters man!

When did you get married?  I guess I don't pay attention too well...

Why shouldn't he love them, don't you?  





Vulcan94

You two don't live with each other?

Quoted: You two don't live with each other?

dude dont ask, i asked the same thing the other day in another one of his wifes other house thing.

Cans....are those above the belly button, or below???

What did he think of her fridge?

Why canned lights when you can have canned sunshine ?

Quoted: Cans....are those above the belly button, or below???

Good point!!!

BTW - just in case you missed it or I forgot, Best Wishes to you both on the marriage!!!

Quoted: What did he think of her fridge?

Careful now....

You used the word cans in (not necessarily) polite conversation.  Congratulations DK_Prof!  You're nolonger Dutch!    Welcome to being an American.  

Quoted: Quoted: What did he think of her fridge? Careful now....

I guess I need to watch more TV or something. All these sexual references are lost on me.  

Quoted: Quoted: I'm not making it up!   She had an electrical contractor over today to install some canned lights in her house - but she had bought these fancy-schmancy 4-inch canned lights herself, with integral transformers (or something like that), that worked really well for the application she need.  Apparently, they were quite unusual, and really cool, and the contractor thought they were awesome. So, fortunately I did not need to drive 350 miles to kick his ass.   Good thing, I bet an asskicking is hell in those wooden shoes.

Plus, you can't sneak worth shit wearing those shoe .... clop, clop, clop.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: I'm not making it up!   She had an electrical contractor over today to install some canned lights in her house - but she had bought these fancy-schmancy 4-inch canned lights herself, with integral transformers (or something like that), that worked really well for the application she need.  Apparently, they were quite unusual, and really cool, and the contractor thought they were awesome. So, fortunately I did not need to drive 350 miles to kick his ass.   Good thing, I bet an asskicking is hell in those wooden shoes. Plus, you can't sneak worth shit wearing those shoe .... clop, clop, clop.

As long as he didnt say he was going to put his bike in her trunk

I told my sister inlaw's sister that I loved her CONES.  How big they were, etc....


She had a basket of pine cones, which she thought I was talking about.


Everyone in the room knew what I was talking about, except her.


She's blond.  

Quoted: I told my sister inlaw's sister that I loved her CONES.  How big they were, etc.... She had a basket of pine cones, which she thought I was talking about. Everyone in the room knew what I was talking about, except her. She's blond.

OK, were needing an English to horn dog translation key here....

Quoted: Quoted: I told my sister inlaw's sister that I loved her CONES.  How big they were, etc.... She had a basket of pine cones, which she thought I was talking about. Everyone in the room knew what I was talking about, except her. She's blond.   OK, were needing an English to horn dog translation key here....

Cones = boobs

never heard that one before?

Some of us electrical contractors have guns too...

The white light you get from low voltage (12volt)"can lights" is great. Very bright when the high beam is on

get your self a good dimmer for the cans for real. Lutron makes good ones for low voltage

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: What did he think of her fridge? Careful now.... I guess I need to watch more TV or something. All these sexual references are lost on me.

You're old. We'll get you through the language until you rot away at your computer though.

Quoted: Cones = boobs never heard that one before?

Not so much....

Yabows, devil pillows, hooters, sweater puppies, zoomers, but not cones.

Cones are found at Baskin Robbins or placed on the side of the road by the DOT.

Quoted: You're old. We'll get you through the language until you rot away at your computer though.

Us old farts are MUCH more direct and unambiguous about our sexual references.

Life's too short to be playin' games.  

Quoted: Plus, you can't sneak worth shit wearing those shoe .... clop, clop, clop.

Well, remember, Denmark used to known as "the Lowlands" because of the at or below sea level elevation of much of the country. So I would guess that they work fine for clandestine ops over there, what with the muddy ground and all.

Quoted: Quoted: Cones = boobs never heard that one before? Not so much.... Yabows, devil pillows, hooters, sweater puppies, zoomers, but not cones. Cones are found at Baskin Robbins or placed on the side of the road by the DOT.

JOE BOB'S CANONICAL "HOOTER" LIST

JOE BOB'S CANONICAL "HOOTER" LIST

The following is the world's most complete list of synonyms
for the female breast. Got one that's not listed here?
Drop an email to Joe Bob at [email protected]
and we'll get it added.
-----------------

A-B-Cs
Abbott and Costello
Airbags
Alaskas
All Day Suckers
Alpha Betas
Alps
Amazons
Ample Supply
Amortisseurs (shock absorbers)
An Bord Bainne (Irish-language; literally, "The Milk Board", The organisation
               which oversees the dairy industry in Ireland)
Angel Cakes
Annette Funicellos
Ant Bites
Appalachians
Apple Dumpling Shops
Apples
Arthritis
Artichokes
Assets
Atom Smashers
Attic
Aurorae Australis
Avant-postes (Outposts)
Avant-scenes (Apron - of stage)
Avanteges -Advantages
Avocados
Awning
B-52's
Babaloos
Backbreakers
Baby Baits
Baby Feeders
Baby's Best Friend
Baby's Dinners
Baby's Public House
Babylons
Back Rubbers
Bag O' Groceries
Baggies
Baggos
Bags
Bagungas
Bait and Lure
Balboas
Balcon - Balcony
Balloons
Baloobas
Banana Squeezers
Bangers
Bangles
Banzis
Baps
Barbeaus
Barnacles
Barnes and Noble
Basketballs
Bassoons
Batons
Baubles
Bazongas
Bazonkers
Bazookas
Bazoomas
Bazooms
Bazoombas
Beacons
Beanbags
Beautiful Eyes
Bebops
Bedtime Beach Balls
Beestings
Begonias
Bejonkers
Ben and Jerry
Bert and Ernie
Berthas
Best Friends
Betty Boops
Bettys
BiBs (bigger is better!)
Big Bazooties
Big Berthasa
Big Boppers
Big Brown Eyes
Big Foot Radials
Big Sacks of Jugs
Bigguns
Bikini Stuffers
Billibongs
Bio Domes
Biscuits
Bits Of Tid
Bizcochos
BJ & the Bear
Blenders
Blimps  
Blinkers
Blockbusters
Blouse Bunnies
Blue Ridges
Bob & Doug
Bob & Ray
Bob & Tom
Bobolas
Bobos
Bodacious Ta-Tas
Boingos
Boites-a-Lait (Milk Bottles)
Bolshy Groodies
Bombastic Mams
Bombers
Bombshells
Bonbons
Bongos
Bonkers
Bonnie and Clyde
Boobage
Boobalicious
Boobers
Boobies
Boobs
Bookends
Bookrests
Boomers
Boom-Boom Rockets
Boons
Boops
Boosters
Bosom Buddies
Bosoms
Boston Wobbelers, The
Bottle
Boulderados
Boulders
Bouncers
Bouncing Beauties
Bouncing Bettys
Boy Bait
Bozos
The Boys
Bra Buddies
Bra Busters
Bra Fight
Bra Stuffers
Brad Pitts
Brail for "Suck me"
Brain Busters
Braunsteins
Breakfast Tray
Breast Friends
Breastages
Breastaurant, The
Breasteses
Breastest Friends
Breasticles
Breasts
Breed Winners
Brisket
Bristol Cities
Bristols
BRitney's Assets (BRAs)
Bronskis
Brown Speckled Pups
Brownies
Brustwarzes
Bubbas
Bubbies
Bubble Cups
Buckets
Buds
Bugs
Bulbs
Bulges
Bullets
Bumper Cars
Bumper Guards
Bumpers
Bumps
Bumps In The Night
Buoys
Bushell-Bubbies
Bust
Busters
Busties
Butter Bags
Butterballs
Buttons
Caboodles
Cachongas
Cadillac Bumpers
Cafe La Mama
Calabazas
Cams
Cannisters
Cannon Balls
Cannons
Cans
Cantaloupes
Capitol Domes
Car Waxers
Carachas
Cargo
Caricatures
Carumbas
Casaba Melons
Casabas
Castinets
Castles in the Air
Cat Heads
Cha-Chas
Chachabingos
Chalky Cliffs
Chalupas
Charlie's Angels
Charlies
Chaw
Cheek Warmers
Cherry Cakes
Cherry Caps
Chest Hams
Chest Meat
Chest Ornaments
Chesterfields
Chesticles
Chestnuts
Chet-Flasted
Chi-Chi's
Chickadees
Chickaroonies
Chihuahuas
Chimichangas
Chimpanzees
Chiquitas
Chock Blocks
Chockey-nips
Choochoos
Chombalonies
Chubs
Chumbawumbas
Chungas
Chopons
Cinch Sacks
Circus Tents
Claire-de-Lunes
Clams
Cleft Udders
Coconuts
Cold Weather Indicators
Combreastables
Commode Cloggers
Concitas
Cones
Congas
Conundrums
Corkers
Countess and The Lady
Cowabungas
Coxcombs
Creamers
Cream Pies
Creampuffs
Cruise Missles
Cubs
Cuddly Dudes
Cuhuangas
Cupcakes
Cup-Runneth-Over Cups
Curves
Cushions
Da-Das
Dactylic Delights
Dagmars
Dairy
Dairy Makers
Dairy Pillows
Dandies
Danglers
Dangling Participles
Danny Devitos
Davey & Goliath
David Duchovneys
Dead Heat in a Zepplin Race
Demigods
Dennis DeYoungs
Desperados
Dessert
Deux Oeufs Sur La Plat
Devil's Dumplings
Diddies
Ding Dongs
Dingers
Dinghies
Dinglebobbers
Dingos
Dinners
Dirigibles
Dirty Pillows
Distributor Caps
Dolly Partons
Domes
Donkey's Ears
Doodads
Doorbells
Doorknobs
Doozers
Doozies
Dopplegangers
Double Dribbles
Double Ds
Double Trouble
Double Whammies
Doudounes
Doughboys
Droopers
Dual Air Bags
Dual Floppies
Duckies
Duece And A Halves
Dueling Banjos
Dugs
Du monde au balcon (French; size-dependant; ; literally, "to have the world on one's balcony")
Dum Dums
Dumbells
Dumplins
Dunes
Durante's
The Dutch Alps
Dynamic Duo
Dynamite
Earmuffs
Eartha Kitts
Eclairs
Eggplants
Eggs
Egos
Eigers
Eisenhowers
El Primo Torpedos
Elephants
Ellby and Arb
Emerson Bigguns
Emmersomes
Empress and the Queen
Enchiladas
Epcots
Epees
Eric and Lyle
Ericas
Everest and Kilimanjaro
Ewers
Exegeses
Explosives
Eyes
Fahrphegnuggens
Fahrvergnugens
Feedbags
First Base
Flapjacks
Flappers
Flat Plains
Flesh Bulbs
Flesh Fillets
Flesh Fujis
Flesh Melons
Floaters
Floats
Flopdoodles
Floppers
Flotation Devices
Flotteurs - Floaters
Flowers of Attitude
Fly Swatters
Fly Tetas
Fog Lights
Footlights
Fred and Ethyl
Fried Eggs
Friends
Front Bum
Front Porch
Frontal Elevation
Frontal Female Water Wings
Frosties
Frybabies
Fujiyamas
Fun Bags
Fun Domes
Funnel Cakes
Gagas
Gajoombas
Garbage Bags
Garbonzas
Garbos
Gazingas
Gazelles
Gazongas
Gazoombas
Geminis
Genaustahagens
George and Gracie
Geraldos
The Girls
Girlie Bumpers
Girlthangs
Glad Bags
The Gland Canyon
Glands
Glandular Endowments
Glass Cutters
Globelets
Globes
Glockenspeils
Gnugens
Gob Stoppers
God's Greatest Creation
God's Milk Bottles
Godzillas
Golden Bozos
Golden Domes
Gongas
Goobers
Good Bits
Goodies
Goodyears
Goombas
Goonas
Grab-Ems
Grand Jeans (French)
Grand Tetons
Grapefruits
Gravity Magnets
Great Galloping Galoogies
Great Wobblin' Wazoobies
Grillwork
Groodies
Groupies
Guavas
Gubiczas
Gumballs
Gumdrops
Gunboats
The Guys
Hakuna Mutatas
Hallelujahs
Hammocks For Two
Handfuls
Handle Bars
Handholds
Handsets
Hand Warmers
Hangers
Hanging Cucumbers
Happy Bags
Happy Pillows
Hat Hangers
Headbangers
Headers
Head Lamps
Headlights
Headphones
Headsets
Heavers
Heavy Duty Honeydews
Hefties
Heifers
Helicopters
Hematomas
Hemispheres
Hercules and Achilles
Hershey Kisses
High Beams
High Pockets
High-Rise Weather Balloons
Hills
Hindenburgs
Hinderbinders
Hippos
Ho Hos
Hobey J's
Hogans
Holmes & Watson
Home Sweet Home
Honey Dews
Honkers
Honorarium
Hood Ornaments
Hoohas
Hoosiers
Hooters
Hoovers
Hoppy and Bob
Horns
Horrorshow Bolshy Groodies
Hot Air Balloons
Hot Commodities
Hotcakes
Hottentots
Hounds, The
House of Lords
How's Your Father's
Howitzers
Howlers
Hubba Bubbas
Hubcaps
Huffies
Hug Bumps
Huge Maguffies
Huggy Bears
Hugh Jooters
Human Tetherballs
Humdingers
Humonganoids
Humpin' Hooters
Hurricane  Lanterns
Hush Puppies
Hypnotizers
ICBMs
Ice Caps
Ice Cubes
Idahos
Igloos
Il y a du beau monde (said of a genreously endowed woman - literally "there are a lot of people there")
Implants
Inflatables
Ios
Ipsedixits
Isaac Newtons
Itty Bits
Itty Bitty Titties
I-Want-Thems
Jackanapes
Jaggers
Jahoobies
Jambalayas
Janet Jacksons
Jawbreakers
Jelly Bells
Jemimas
Jerry-Bilts
Jersey Cities
Jets
Jibs
Jigglies
Jigglers
Jiggly Wigglies
Jobbers
John And Paul
Jordans
Jubblies
Juggernauts
Juggies
Jugglies
Jugs
Jukes
Jumblies
Jumbo Chickpeas
Jumbos
K-12 & Everest
Kabombas
Kabukis
Kagemushas
Kajoobies
Kalamazoos
Kanchenjungas
Karl Marx and Joseph Stalin
Kawangas
Kayaks
Kazongas
Kazoos
Keepers
Kettle Drums
Kiwis
Knicknacks
Knobbers
Knobs
Knockers
Kongas
Kukla, Fran, and Ollie
Kumquats
La Breas
Lactating lungs
Lactic Lobes
Lacto Grenades
Lactoids
Lampoons
Launch Codes
Laurel and Hardy
Lean-To's
Lemons
Lethal Weapons
Leverage
Lewinskis
Lewis and Witties
Lightbulbs
Lindas
Lip Fodder
Little Duckies
Llamas
Load Stones
Loaves
Loaves fo love
Loblollies
Locklears
Long Range Tanks
Lollies
Lollipops
Lollos
Lookers
Lost Sheep
Love Handles
Love Jugs
Love Lumps
Love Melons
Love Muffins
Lovlies
Low Riders
Lucky Charms
Lug 'Ems
Lulas
Lulus
Lung Covers
Lung Hammers
Lung Nuts
Lungwarts
Luscious Lip-smackers
Macaroos
Mackerels
Madonnas
Magnates
Magnets
Magnificent Pontoons of Love
Magookins
Maguppies
Maharanis
Mahatmas
Majestic Mountains
Major Dongs
Major League Mammaries
Major Motion Picture Material
Male-Madness Inducers
Mamacitas
Mambazos
Mammalian Protruberances
Mammarambas
Mammaries
Mammary Lane
Mammies
Mams
Man Magnets
Man Puppets
Mangos
ManNIPulators
Mappemonde (those old fashioned maps showing two hemispheres)
Maracas
Marangos
Maraschinos
Margaritas
Marimbas
Marshmallows
Marx Brothers
Massage Pillows
Matching Headlights
Mau Maus
Mausers
Mazongas
McDLT's
McFloppities
Meatbags
Meatballs
Meat Loaves
Melon Patch
Melones
Melons
Mesmerizers
Mickey and Minnie
Mike and Ike
Milk Bags
Milk Bottles
Milk Cans
Milk Duds
Milk Fountains
Milk Jugs
Milk Makers
Milk Melons
Milk Shakes
Milk Towers
Milk Wagons
Milky Sacks of Calcium
Milky Moos
Minarets
Minesweepers
Minneapolis and St. Paul
Minnebagos
Missles
Mobutus
Mogambas
Mojuba's, The
Mole Hills
Mommas
Mondos
Moneymakers
Monroes
Montezumas
Moo Moos
Moogies
Moon Pies
Moonlight Sonatas
Mosobs
Mosquito Bites
Mother Loads
Mounds
Mounds of Jello
Moutain Peaks
Mountains
Mount Fujies
Mouthwatering Scoops Of Flesh
Moveable Feast
Muchachas
Muffins
Mulligans
Murphies
Mushmelons
Mutt and Jeff
Nancies
National Geographics
Nature's Founts
Nature's Little Thermometers
Naughty Bits
Nay-Nays
Nectarines
Neeners
Nenes
Nevernevers
Nibards
Niblets
Nibs
Nice Pair of thru'pennies
Nice Set Of Hands
Nice-uns
Nichons
Nin-Nins
Ninnies
Ninny Jugs
Ninth and Tenth Wonders of the World
Nippeloons
Nippelos
Nippers
Nipples
Nipple-Caddies
Nipple Sundaes
Nips
Nodes
Nodules
Noochies
Noogies
Norks
Northern Neon-Beamed Headlights
Nortons
Nose Cones
Nubbins
Nuclear Wareheads
Nukes
Num-Nums
Obelisks
Oblations
Oboes
Off-On Volume & the Channel Selector
Omigods
Oompas
Oppenheimers
Oracles
Oranges
Orbs
Ostrich Eggs
Ottomans
Overhang
Overstuffed Cushions
Overstuffed Pillows
Owls
Padding
Paducahs
Pagodas
Pair
Pair of Problems
Palms
Palookas
Pamelas
Pancakes
Papayas
Parabolas
Pare-chocs (bumpers)
Parrots
Part Numbers, The
Party Bags
Party Hats
Party Passes
Pastor Baiters
Pastries
Paw Patties
Peaches
Peacocks
Peakers
Peaks
Pears
Pebbles
Pects
Peepers
Pencil Erasers
Pendulums
Penis Pillows
Perkys
Perpetual Entertainment
Personal Flotation Devices
Pert and Perkies
Pete and Repeat
Pia Zadoras
Pick & Peck
Pies
Pike's Peaks
Pillows
Pimples
Ping Pings
Pink-nosed Puppies
Pinkies
Pinky & Perky
Pips
Pirate's Dream
Planetoids
Pleasant Eminences
Pleasure Mounds
Pleasure Peaks
Plentifuls
Plucktifuls
Plums
Pneumatic Bliss
Pods of Lust
Pointer Sisters
Pointers
Points
Pokers
Polygons
Pom Poms
Ponderosas
Pontoons
Poppinjays
Portable Typewriters
Potatoes
Presidential Pair
Pretty-Pretties
Pride And Joy
Professors
Proof That God Exists
Protuberances
PT Boats
Pumpkin Patch
Pumpkins
Pumps
Puppies
Pushmatahas
Push-Ups
Pyramids
Quakers
Quantities
Quantum Heaps
Quasars
Quit-its
Quonset Huts
Rack
Rackage
Radar Domes
Radials
Ragtag and Bobtail
Raisins
Ralph Waldo Emersons
Rangoons
Raquels
Raspberry Ripples
Reasons To Live
Red Carpets
Rib Balloons
Rib Bumpers
Rib Cushions
Rib Flaps
Rivets
Roberts
Rockets
Rockies
Romans
Roploplos
Rosebuds
Rositas
Rotors
Rotundas Grandes
Roundabouts
Roundies
Roundtrippers
Ruby Reds
Rudolphs
Running Lights
Saggers
Saggies
Salamanders
Saline bags
The Saline Solutions
Salt & Pepper
Sams
Sandbags  
Sapphos
Satellites
Schmeebs on those Nortons
Scones
Scoops
Scud Missles
Scylla & Charybdis
Searchlights
Set
Shabba-dos
Shakers
Shebas
Shelf
Shermans
Sherman Tanks
Shimmies
Shirt Potatoes
Shirt Stuffers
Shivarees
Shlobes
Shmozobs
Shock Absorbers
Shock And Awe
Shoe Buffers
Show Stoppers
Sierra Madres
Sigfried And Roy
Silicone Earmuffs
Silicone Sisters
Silicones
Silicone Suprise Supremes
Silos
Silver Stars
Sir Galahad and King Arthur
Skeeter Bites
Skeeter Chews
Skin Sacks
Ski Slopes to Heaven
Skooners
Slappers
Smart Set
Smith and Wesson
Smoothies
Smuggling Raisins
Snack Rack
Snorbs
Snow Cones
Snow Tires
Snowy Prominences
Snuggle Pups
Sockdollagers
Sopapillas
Space Aliens
Spark Plugs
Specials
Speed Bags
Speed Bumps
Spheres
Spic And Span
Splazoingas
Spongecakes
Spontaneous Combustibles
Spuds
Sqaushers
Squaw Valley
Squeeky Toys
Stacks
Stanley and Livingston
Stash in the Dash
Stocking Stuffers
Strap Hangers
Stratus-spheres
Stress Busters
Stripper's ATMs
Stuff
Stuffing
Stun Grenades
Sturgeons
Sucklebags
Sugar Cubes
Sugar Plums
Super Droopers
Supernauts
Sultanas
Sweater Bumpers
Sweater Kittens
Sweater Meat
Sweater Melons
Sweater Mittens
Sweater Puffs
Sweater Puppets
Sweater Puppies
Sweater Stuffers
Sweat Glands
Sweetrolls
Tahitis
Talents
Tallapoosas
Tamales
Tambourines
Tango & Cash
Tankers
Tartugas
Tassles
Tastykakes
Tatas
Tater Tots
Tats
Tatties
Tattlers
Teacups
Teatolas
Teats
Tee Pees
Teetees
Teeters
Tentacles
Terrible Twos
Terrible Twosome
Tetas
Tetons
Thangs
Thank Yous
Thelma And Louise
Thingamajigs
Thingamajugs
Thingies
Thousand Pities
Thwackers
Ticket Punchers
Ticket Sellers
Tidbits
Tiddly-Winks
Tig Bitties
Tig Ol' Bitties
Time Zones
Tippers
Tishomingos
Titbits
Tits
Titskis
Titter
Titties
TNT's
Tobacco Pouch
Tomatoes
Tom-Toms
Tom & Jerry
Tongue Depressors
Tongue Twisters
Tonsils
Toolbags
Tooters
Tootsie Pops
Top Bollocks (or Top Bollox)
Tora Boras
Torpedoes
Tortillas
Tortugas
Totos
Totties
Towers
Towering Twin Peaks
Town and Cities
Tracts of Land
Tribbles
Turaluras
Twangers
Tweakers
Tweedledee & Tweedledum
Tweekers
Twin Cities
Twin Peaks
The Twins
Two Eggs, Sunny Side Up
Two Puppies in a Burlap Bag
Twofers
Tympanies
Type 2s
Uberalles
U-Boats
Udders
Uhurus
Umbrellas
Umlauts
Upper Karoos
Upper Ten
USDAs
Utopia
Van Dorens
Victrolas
Volcanoes
Volksvanins
Volumes
Volvos
Voos
Wa-wa pedals
Wahwahs
Waldos
Wallace & Grommit
Wally and the Beav
Wally Wispoppers
Walters
Wanna Bs
Warheads
Warts
Water Balloons
Watermelons
Weapons
Wedding Tackle
Whammers
Whapoons
Whatchacallems
Whim Whams
White Rabbits
Whole and 2%
Whoopies
Whoppers
Wibbly Wobbly Wonders
Widebodies
Wigglers
Wigwams
Willie & Waylon
Wilsons
Windbags
Windjammers
Windmills
Windshield Wipers
Winnebagos
Wipers
Wobblers
Womanhood
Wonder Twins
Wonderments
Wongas
Wonkas
Woodymakers
Woofers
Wookies
Wopbopaloobops
Workbench
World Trade Centers
Wows
Wreaths
Xenoliths
X-Rateds
X-Ray  Glasses
Xylophones
Yabbos
Yabos
Yahoos
Yams
Yayas
Yazoos
Yeast Dough
Ying Yangs
Yippie & Yahoo
Yippies
Yolandas
Yomamas
Yowsers
Yubees
Yum-Yums
Yummies
Yugos
Z-bras
Zagger & Evans
Zeppelins
Ziggurats
Ziggys
Zingers
Zippys
Zoom Zooms
Zoombas
Zoomers
Zwiebacks
ZZ Tops

Quoted: Quoted: You're old. We'll get you through the language until you rot away at your computer though. Us old farts are MUCH more direct and unambiguous about our sexual references. Life's too short to be playin' games.

I tried being direct and unambiguous about sex one time.

Still have a loose tooth from that one.

You guys got married, but dont live together?

Huh?

You getting used to saying, "My wife" yet?

Just married joke.V

Conversation overheard in the grocery store between two nubian goddesses.
First goddess, "I hear you got married last week, is it so"?

Second goddess, "Sista, it's so so I can't hardly touch it with a powder puff"!

Quoted: You guys got married, but dont live together? Huh?

+1

What did I miss?

So I guess I was the only one who thought this was about silencers....

"i like her bangs"

Quoted: Quoted: You guys got married, but dont live together? Huh? +1 What did I miss?

It's a career thing. It's not that we don't WANT to live together, it's that not a lot of research universities have two openings in the same department in any given year PLUS we would have to be the two best qualified people in the country.  So we are both going to play out our tenure clocks at our current universities, and see what happens when we both go up for tenure in the next year and a half.  
Either way - it will almost certainly be resolved within the next two years - and then hopefully we'll end up in the same city.  If either of us gets tenure at our respective universities, then we will end up in the same city - we just don't know which city it will be.

But after living in separate cities for seven out of the last nine years, you get used to it.  




Oh - and all you jokers.  You're ALL on my list!  

ETA: And an ass-kicking with clogs WOULD hurt!  

Quoted: It's a career thing. It's not that we don't WANT to live together, it's that not a lot of research universities have two openings in the same department in any given year PLUS we would have to be the two best qualified people in the country.  So we are both going to play out our tenure clocks at our current universities, and see what happens when we both go up for tenure in the next year and a half.   Either way - it will almost certainly be resolved within the next two years - and then hopefully we'll end up in the same city.  If either of us gets tenure at our respective universities, then we will end up in the same city - we just don't know which city it will be. But after living in separate cities for seven out of the last nine years, you get used to it.

Hey, it's always fresh, exciting, and joyous to see each other. There are worse ways to preserve a relationship.

Quoted: Quoted: It's a career thing. It's not that we don't WANT to live together, it's that not a lot of research universities have two openings in the same department in any given year PLUS we would have to be the two best qualified people in the country.  So we are both going to play out our tenure clocks at our current universities, and see what happens when we both go up for tenure in the next year and a half.   Either way - it will almost certainly be resolved within the next two years - and then hopefully we'll end up in the same city.  If either of us gets tenure at our respective universities, then we will end up in the same city - we just don't know which city it will be. But after living in separate cities for seven out of the last nine years, you get used to it.   Hey, it's always fresh, exciting, and joyous to see each other. There are worse ways to preserve a relationship.

It IS getting a little old, but it's also nice (in a way).

We usually get to see each other every three week (for a long weekend), and we hang out for much of the summer in one city or the other, and we go to a lot of conferences (and vacation) together.  Plus, I get to live exactly the way I want, with my house exactly the way I want.  Wake up when I want, eat when and what I want, watch TV all I want, stay up as late as I want, etc.

It's a half-empty, half-full cup kind of deal.  

Quoted: When did you get married?  I guess I don't pay attention too well...

Almost 3 week ago.  Pictures and everything - over in the girley forum:

www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?b=1&f=71&t=378769

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: You guys got married, but dont live together? Huh? +1 What did I miss? It's a career thing. It's not that we don't WANT to live together, it's that not a lot of research universities have two openings in the same department in any given year PLUS we would have to be the two best qualified people in the country.  So we are both going to play out our tenure clocks at our current universities, and see what happens when we both go up for tenure in the next year and a half.   Either way - it will almost certainly be resolved within the next two years - and then hopefully we'll end up in the same city.  If either of us gets tenure at our respective universities, then we will end up in the same city - we just don't know which city it will be. But after living in separate cities for seven out of the last nine years, you get used to it.   Oh - and all you jokers.  You're ALL on my list!   ETA: And an ass-kicking with clogs WOULD hurt!

Oh! I'm soooo scared!  Even I can outrun someone is wooden shoes!  



Vulcan94

Gee...in my line of work I'd have thought headphones.

cans

Quoted: Oh! I'm soooo scared!  Even I can outrun someone is wooden shoes!   Vulcan94

Yeah, but eventually you'll trip over a strategically-placed 200 lb. wheel of Gouda, and then your goose is cooked. I understand that was DK-Prof's granddad's contribution to the war effort during WWII: he was a member of the intrepid "Edamkommando," helping to install Gouda barricades and Schmearcase pits along the "Leidenline" between Venlo and Tegelen on the border with Germany. Rommel is said to have remarked "Auf Maginot, auflachen; auf Leiden erschrecken." (At the Maginot [line], we laugh; at the Leiden [line] we tremble.) Thanks to the efforts of the Edamkommando, Holland's windmills were preserved for the Allies' use in the post-Normandy invasion and occupation of Europe.

Quoted: Quoted: Oh! I'm soooo scared!  Even I can outrun someone is wooden shoes!   Vulcan94 Yeah, but eventually you'll trip over a strategically-placed 200 lb. wheel of Gouda, and then your goose is cooked. I understand that was DK-Prof's granddad's contribution to the war effort during WWII: he was a member of the intrepid "Edamkommando," helping to install Gouda barricades and Schmearcase pits along the "Leidenline" between Venlo and Tegelen on the border with Germany. Rommel is said to have remarked "Auf Maginot, auflachen; auf Leiden erschrecken." (At the Maginot [line], we laugh; at the Leiden [line] we tremble.) Thanks to the efforts of the Edamkommando, Holland's windmills were preserved for the Allies' use in the post-Normandy invasion and occupation of Europe.

Oh, and to add a little more: the ivory tower can be a hard master.  That's where my wife and I are at right now.  She took a "quasi-faculty" position at a community college, and I am still working in a support role in my field, so that we can still live in the same town (we don't *work* in the same town, but that's another story).

I have turned down three excellent positions in the last three years (still kicking myself for two of them) because of this phenomenon.  You would be surprised at how many academic couples don't live in the same town/area, or even state!  It just [almost always] comes with the territory.

Jake.

Quoted: Quoted: When did you get married?  I guess I don't pay attention too well... Almost 3 week ago.  Pictures and everything - over in the girley forum: www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?b=1&f=71&t=378769

"Girley??"""
Who you callin' girly clog boy?

The pics are lovely...as is Mrs Prof...I have no idea about her cans....

Quoted: Quoted: Oh - and all you jokers.  You're ALL on my list!   ETA: And an ass-kicking with clogs WOULD hurt!   Oh! I'm soooo scared!  Even I can outrun someone is wooden shoes!   Vulcan94

Even seen his wooden shoes?