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11/2/2022 4:30:06 PM
Posted: 5/7/2003 4:49:34 AM EST
I got upset last night when on another of my threads, I thought a couple of posters were not very kind. Since then, I have thought about it and decided, it doesn't matter. In the whole scheme of things, it doesn't amount to a hill of beans.

I referred to them as a$$holes, and for that I apologize.

I feel that an explanation is in order, as to why it triggered the response that it did.

I am 38 and I have a wonderful wife (of 7 years now) 2 beautiful girls, ages 5 and 4. I have been a wanderer all of my life, until I met my wife. I had always avoided responsibility, and had never amounted to much.

These last 7 years, I have worked and tried my best, to be stable, and responsible. It took me three years before I was able to really get it together. The last 4 years came together, I was able to find really good paying jobs, and I was taking good care of my family. I got laid off a couple of times, but was able to find a better job each time. Was able to pay off some bills, and even bought a nice modest house.

7 almost 8 months ago, I got laid off from my most recent job. I wasn't real concerned, I had some savings in the bank, got a little severance from the company, and later on if I still wasn't working, I would have unemployment. But it would never get that far, at just paying the basics, I could go for 6 months on what I had available. They tell you to have a six month reserve, and I did, so all  was good.

All was good, until 4 months had gone by and I had only seen 1 interview. Almost a hundred resumes sent out and only 1 interview.

So we started being even more cautious with our funds and managed to get an extra 2 months out of what we had and our tax return.

I am in the IT field, a LAN/WAN administrator with both experience and certifications. But I do not have a degree.

I have been a manager for an auto parts store, owned my own business, remodeled houses, delivered food service products, and other various jobs over the years.

I guess part of it as well, has been the unrest on the site the past couple of weeks as well.

Last night I slept the best I have, in weeks. It was all coming to a head when 3 weeks ago we found out my wife is pregnant with our third child. So I have not slept well.

Last night, I saw the goodness of our brothers on this site, I was ashamed at the time, but now I am not ashamed to admit that I cried a little.

I don't know what the future holds, but I know I have friends.

Thank you all

Dave, Holly, Arianna, Emily, and ?
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 4:54:09 AM EST
Good luck to you and yours.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:08:13 AM EST
Don't worry about it. Some people need to be called assholes and some people just need their ass whipped. That's nothing to apologize for.

Good luck in your job search. I'd see if there's any openings in the company that I work for but the no degree is going to hurt you and they just laid off a few people in the systems/IT group. They even busted one 20 year employee down to a manufacturing line position.

In any case, I hope things work out well for you.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:12:37 AM EST
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:14:32 AM EST
I hope this may help. Go to the following site:


Look for a job under the 2210 series, information technology specialist, you do not require a degree to be a technical specialist. There are currently 11 openings in Colorado. Fill out and submit the online resume for each opening and keep an eye on the site for anything new. Working for the federal government is decent money, job security, and benefits.

If you have questions email or IM me, I will be more than happy to help in any way I can.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:16:31 AM EST
I know it truely sux Dave, white collar crime is porkin all the working class people.

I'm in the same boat (almost)
Most of my savings was 'pissed away' by the ex thru my lawyer fees for divorce (still not final, btw)[rolleyes]
my ~$100,000 stock ownership in the company I got laid off from (they filed for bankruptcy) is now about equal to about $2,100.

my 401k got hit hard too...

but some good will come out of this.. the bitch went for the money and wanted to play games with the divorce... she will now get way less than she would have if she kept it civil.
f*ck her.

I've been unemployed for a month..
1 job interview, which I turned down...(I will not work for a freakin' union, nothing but theifs IMNSHO)

I feel for you and everyone else out there in our situation...

God speed and best wishes!
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:18:27 AM EST
Kind of ironic you have no degree, but have experience and certifications and can't find a job. I have a BS degree in IT, little to no experience and no certifications and can't find a job either.

I feel your pain. I have sent out 100's of resumes also and only had one interview (I didn't get the job).

Keep your chin up. There is something out there for you, and it is part of something bigger (at least that is what I keep telling myself [;)]). Find comfort in knowing you aren't alone and people that are not as strong as you have been there before and came out on top. You sound like someone that tries hard to get what you want. Don't give up, you'll get a job.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:20:11 AM EST
thanks guys,

and thanks for the link Stryker
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:21:59 AM EST
Don't know of any jobs, but I'll help as I can.  Contact me.  I've been there, keep your chin up, things will get better.

Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:38:36 AM EST
If you ever need a hand/help/advice we're here for ya man! Oh, and Congrats!
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 5:54:00 AM EST
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 6:03:17 AM EST

I don't want to sound to preachy, but the Lord will provide.

I got a job 2 weeks before the birth of my first born daughter.  No degree, no experience, just a "paper MCSE".  

Hang in there.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 6:47:12 AM EST
Dave, I looked for your thread, can't find it, did you delete it??
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 7:59:12 AM EST
Dave, I looked for your thread, can't find it, did you delete it??
View Quote

Yes, I requested that it be deleted.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 8:04:57 AM EST
Tough times for sure. Approach looking for work like it's your job. It's not easy at all but it is work and can pay off.

If you've only got one interview after a 100 resumes then you might want to look your resume over again - that ratio just doesn't sound right. I was also taught that each resume needs to be crafted - directed like a laser - at the job the company is looking to hire for.

The IT turn around is coming. Good people with experence and drive are still needed just not in your neighborhood yet.

We're pulling for ya'
View Quote

Not to be making up excuses, but I have been told that they are receiving 900+ resumes for every job posted, if they sort by degree/no degree then I am out on the first sort. I made my choice not to go to college, which appears to be a mistake on my part.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 8:15:21 AM EST
...if they sort by degree/no degree then I am out on the first sort. I made my choice not to go to college, which appears to be a mistake on my part...
View Quote

Most times my fiance sorts her potentials by SKILL possessed.  Like C++ or Unix or Helpdesk or whatever the hiring manager is looking for...

This is her MO......probably others do that too...not all the computer gurus have degrees.  Some of the best IT related I have ever met are still getting their degree @ 40 y.o........

There is hope.  It will fall in your lap most likely.  [:D]

Link Posted: 5/7/2003 8:16:03 AM EST
It's a tough ride to be in your situation. Was there myself not too long ago.

The one thing I kept on my mind was that sooner or later, I was going to be working again. So I had better get started on turning sooner into now.

Ruck up and stand tall, right now there is someone who needs an employee, an employee EXACTALLY like yourself. Figure out a way to meet. [:D]

Tell the wife and kids "Hi" for me, and that things are never as bleak as they seem

My families thoughts and prayers are with you and yours.

Link Posted: 5/7/2003 8:16:53 AM EST
no thedave, college for IT is a waste.

By the time I entered college, I already had been programming for 10 years and contract programming for 3 years. I was working with emerging standards like SQL and my university (considered a progressive engineering school) was teaching VSAM and RPG.

It was a complete and total waste which represented NOTHING in the grand scheme. In-demand job skills are learned in the trench.

Don't sell yourself short. Focus on the cross-collateralization of your skills to leverage something new.

The government IT contracting market is through the ceiling right now. Security is still hot. Disaster recovery is bigger now with the 9/11 gloom. A new, emerging area is outsourced quality assurance and risk management -- particularly with vendor driven solutions. 800mhz is going to continue the wireless push at the government level with funding from Homeland Defense. Database is super hot with XML picking up steam.

Yes, networking is flat. Administration is flat, but get in with some of the tertiery skills you picked up in your career. You touched on a lot of things, now it's a matter of PACKAGING. Don't be afraid to 'wing it'. As an IT pro, that's what we do half the time anyway, RIGHT?

I'd be happy to help you with your resume if you are interested. Email me and I will RE: so you can send me the attachment (hopefully in Word).
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 8:20:33 AM EST
Tell the wife and kids "Hi" for me, and that things are never as bleak as they seem

My families thoughts and prayers are with you and yours.

View Quote

We do have a lot to be thankful for, we have our health, we have groceries, we have each other, and we have a roof over our heads.

Not to mention we have friends, here and every where.

Thank you and everyone else for their prayers.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 9:01:05 AM EST
Glad you're feeling better this morning. I hope I was able to help out some little bit.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 10:11:40 AM EST
Prayers sent fellow techie...
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 10:19:51 AM EST
What you need is a couple of hours of turning the barrel of an ar hot. Best wishes and let us know if we can help.
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 10:26:29 AM EST
Hang in there!!

If God has blessed you with another child he'll bless you with a means to support them!
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 10:37:28 AM EST
Dude...I have an AAS in NEtworking +Cisco, a BS in Computer Science, 6 solid good years of experience.

I  left Texas a few months back and moved to Kalamazoo, MIchigan.

There isnt SH*T unless you move to [email protected]#kin De....troit

Good Luck....You will figure it out in due time...
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 12:01:05 PM EST
Congrats on #3!!!!
If you show more gusto than the other aplicants you will get the job!!!!
You could try little tricks like telling a prospective employer that you will work free for a week to prove your worth that coupled with telling said employer about your family/financal situation should help quite alot But the biggest help of all is the fact I am praying for you  so rest assured the big guy upstairs is in your corner!!!
God Bless
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 12:15:33 PM EST
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 1:56:16 PM EST
you can swear now on this site and its a free country so you should call anyone what you want. years ago I had moderators and trolls saying all kind of junk about me under a different name and nothing was said. now you can swear but you can make fun of anyone
Link Posted: 5/7/2003 2:50:40 PM EST
Hey thedave:

If you need to let off some steam. IM me, type "asshole" and send it.

I'll read it. and know it's thedave kicking the cat.

No problems.

Link Posted: 5/7/2003 7:02:22 PM EST
Link Posted: 5/8/2003 7:52:15 PM EST
Damn, laughing already!

Always a good sign. Take care bro.

Link Posted: 5/8/2003 10:02:44 PM EST

I'm a lawyer in Fort Fun.  My partners are always on my tail about doing more pro bono, but I can't stand working for free for the typical welfare pukes who feel like they can coast on the system.  

On the other hand, I'd be honored to step to the plate and give you a hand if you need anything.  Double honored.  I'm a civil litigator, but becuase I DO so much collection work, I can give you some pointers on dealing with and restructuring debt.

Now, if you haven't done so already, you need to take the first step toward extending your options in the job market and stopping the "flow" of $$ as much as possible.  Sit down and write out a budget of all of your monthly expenditures.  Then start cutting.  Your house, for example, will probably have to go.  Its better to make a "work out" deal with the lender and give a deed in lieu of foreclosure, then to actually have them come in and  pursue an actual forclosure, which will wipe you out of another $10K in their fees and stuff unnecessarily.   Depending on the dollar value left on your loan, you may be able to simply "walk" from that obligation.   If you've got a big enough chunk of equity, you could sell the house and get some cash at closing.  My guess is you haven't had the house long enough to have that kind of equity.  So, see if family or friends can take you and yours in for a short while, until you can find cheaper digs.  One of my very wealth clients went through exactly what you're experience when he was in his thirties.   He moved his wife and three boys into a double-wide for two years, and in the end, it all worked out.  Your pride will hurt, brother, but if you let yourself get forclosed and put into a big hole financially, you're going to have a toughter time crawling out.  Better to swallow that pride now, make the right moves, and then get back into the swing as things come along.  

Are you taking stopgap employment?  In N. Colorado, the builders and roofers are just about to hit their heavy season, and they're always willing to train.  Lets see... landscapers will also be getting busy, and the tire shops (Discount Tire, Big O) will all be hitting their stride this summer.  Also, a lot of places in the college towns (Boulder, Greeley, Ft. Fun) will be losing student employees so you may be able to take advantage there.  Take one of these jobs, and make sure it pays health insurance.  You need to get your wife on an insurance policy ASAP if she's not already.   You need to ask questions, so that you can get a job you can quit and move on and still have COBRA mandated health insurance eligibility.   Try to work 4 weekdays and all weekend if you can.  Spend your extra weekday hitting the street with resumes looking for a job in your "true" calling.  But don't count on that right now.  I've got clients in the IT business up here, and everyone is hungry.  People are being let go, not hired.  So you need to focus on surviving.  Remember, every hour is an opportunity.  Even if you're not "fully employed" during that hour, and are not living up to your highest wage earning potential, getting SOME income for that hour is better than getting no income.  You can never get that hour back once its gone.  Double up and moonlight 2 or 3 nights a week.  Its doable, and the extra couple hundred a week will come in handy.  

I saw on CO-AR15 that you're selling your guns.  That hurts, but remember that in the end its "all just stuff."   Hopefully, your buyers will be gentlemen and offer to sell back to you at cost anything they buy during your fire sale.  I sure would.  

Do you have two cars?   You'd be surprised how easy it is to go down to one.  Half the insurance; half the car payment; half the gas.  You'll have to help each other get from here to there, but if you've been married as long as you say you'll do fine.  

Lets see...  I'm not sure about donating blood these days, as the bloodbanks have been very successful in brainwashing people into thinking that they should give blood for free.  But back when I was in college you could (and I sometimes did) deposit blood twice a week, at $20 a pop.  Something to look into, at least.  

(An alternative to selling your house:   Rent it out, furnished, at approximately 75% of going rate on a 6 month lease.  This will only be cost effective if you get good tenants and if you can secure somewhere to stay for free during the interim.  That won't be easy with a wife and two kids, but it won't be impossible either.  Your girls can and should share a room.   So really, all you need is two bedrooms somewhere.  

Anyway, just some random thoughts.  

But mainly, if you need me to respond to some pissant collection attorney or get someone of your back, I'd be glad to.  For free.  De nada.  We're all part of a group here, and we need to watch each other's backs sometimes. Just IM me.

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