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11/22/2017 10:05:29 PM
Posted: 10/23/2004 5:57:44 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/24/2004 8:48:04 AM EST by Nugz]
johnkerryads.websiteanimal.com/

Send this to every Democrat you know. Maybe, just maybe, a few of them will GET A CLUE.

If this is a dupe... I dont care!

-Nugz

ETA: Political Jokes have been added, please share yours here.
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:00:20 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:04:09 PM EST
I am glad someone put a face on that .WAV file... Kick Ass!
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:07:24 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/23/2004 6:09:27 PM EST by Nugz]
Here is a joke for those who may have already seen the "ultimate Kerry ad". I got this one in an email.

John Kerry is visiting a primary school and he
visits one of the classes. They are in the middle of
a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asks Kerry if he would like to
lead the discussion of the word "tragedy". So the
Illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a
tragedy.

One little boy stands up and offers: "If my best
friend who lives on a farm is playing in the field and
a runaway tractor comes along and knocks him dead,
that would be a tragedy." "No," says Kerry
"that would be an accident."

A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus
carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing
everyone inside, that would be a tragedy." "I'm
afraid not," explains the exalted leader. "That's
what we would call a great loss."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer.
Joh Kerry searches the room. "Isn't there
someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally at the back of the room, little Johnny raises
his hand. In a quiet voice he says: "If Air Force One carrying you was struck by a missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."

"Fantastic!" exclaims John Kerry"That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?" "Well," says the boy, "because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an accident either."


-Nugz
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:18:51 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:21:37 PM EST
And for you Hitlery lovers...

Hillary and Arnold:

Senator Hillary Clinton was attending a party, when she noticed
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.
She walked over to him, and in a quiet voice said; "If you were
my husband I would poison your drink."
Schwarzenegger smiled, leaned forward, and whispered in herear, "And if you were my wife I would drink it!"


Yeah, I know... I cant believe he signed that .50 cal ban either...but that joke is still funny.
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:30:56 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/23/2004 6:31:35 PM EST by Nugz]
Sheesh, tough crowd.

An airplane was about to crash. There were 5 passengers on board, but only 4 parachutes. The first passenger said, "I am Kobe Bryant, the NBA's best basketball player. I am about to beat a rape charge and make millions in free agency. I can't afford to die." So he took the first pack and left the plane.
The second passenger, Hillary Clinton said, "I am the wife of the former US President, a Senator from New York, and a potential future president. And I am the smartest woman in American history, so America's people don't want me to die." She took the second pack and jumped out of the plane. The third passenger, John Kerry, said, "I am my party's nominee for President. I survived Vietnam and received the Purple Heart. The country needs heroes like me." So he grabbed the pac k next to him and jumped. The fourth passenger, President George W. Bush, said to the fifth passenger, a 10-year-old schoolgirl, "I have lived a full life, and served my country well, I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The girl said, "That's okay. There's a parachute left for you, Mr.President. America's smartest woman took my schoolbag.


-Nugz
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:52:20 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 6:59:18 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 8:58:00 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/23/2004 8:59:36 PM EST by paenutz]
BTT for the factor! Commie bashing NEVER gets Old!

ETA: StemCell Research Pic.

Link Posted: 10/23/2004 9:10:36 PM EST
that about sums it up
Link Posted: 10/23/2004 9:27:09 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/23/2004 9:27:42 PM EST by 2A373]
Smart Bartender

A popular bar had a new robotic bartender installed. It could not only dispense drinks flawlessly, but also -- like any good bartender -- engage in appropriate conversation.

A man enters the bar, orders a drink. The robot serves him a perfectly prepared cocktail, then asks him, "What's your IQ?"

The man replies, "150."

And the robot proceeds to make conversation about Quantum physics, string theory, atomic chemistry, etc. The customer is very impressed and thinks, "This is really cool."

He decides to test the robot. He walks out of the bar, turns around, and comes back in for another drink. Again, the robot serves him the drink and asks him, "What's your IQ?"

The man responds, "100." And immediately the robot starts talking, but this time, about football, baseball, cheerleaders, etc.

Really impressed, the man leaves the bar and decides to give the robot one more test. He goes back in, the robot serves him and asks, "What's your IQ?"

The man replies, "50."

And the robot says, "So, you gonna vote for Kerry? "

John Kerry was going to visit the Catholic National Cathedral outside Washington as part of his campaign. Kerry's campaign manager made a visit to the Cardinal and said to him, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity among Catholics because of Kerry's position on abortion and the like. We'd gladly make a contribution to the church of $100,000 if during your sermon you'd say John Kerry is a saint."

The Cardinal thinks it over for a moment and agrees to do it.
Kerry shows up, and as the Mass progresses the Cardinal begins his homily.


"John Kerry is petty, a self absorbed hypocrite and a nit-wit. He is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. He is the worst example of a Catholic I've ever personally known. But, compared to Ted Kennedy, John Kerry is a saint."

Link Posted: 10/24/2004 8:46:52 AM EST
BTT for the day crew.

Link Posted: 10/24/2004 8:52:00 AM EST

Originally Posted By 2A373:
<snip>
"John Kerry is petty, a self absorbed hypocrite and a nit-wit. He is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. He is the worst example of a Catholic I've ever personally known. But, compared to Ted Kennedy, John Kerry is a saint."




PWNED!

Link Posted: 10/24/2004 8:55:32 AM EST

Originally Posted By paenutz:
BTT for the factor! Commie bashing NEVER gets Old!

ETA: StemCell Research Pic.

tinypic.com/d8xh0



That pumpkin looks like his forehead sideways...

Digital
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 9:38:08 AM EST
tagged for emails..
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 9:52:12 AM EST

Originally Posted By paenutz:
tinypic.com/e0tnn





We want YOUR money.....jesus, why is that so hard to grasp????


Funny ad btw
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 10:14:30 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 11:15:22 AM EST
Is it me or is Bush going everywhere Kerry goes? So far in the past weeks, President Bush has followed John Kerry to Florida; Iowa; New Mexico; Las Vegas; Los Angeles; and he follows him to Portland, Oregon. The only place he never followed John Kerry was Vietnam.
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 11:20:57 AM EST

Originally Posted By paenutz:
tinypic.com/e0tnn



"We want you are money"?
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 11:38:01 AM EST


Nice catch man. I had to go back and look at it. lol.
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 10:13:37 PM EST

Originally Posted By SNorman:

Originally Posted By paenutz:
tinypic.com/e0tnn



"We want you are money"?



LOL, poor paenutz... he is the victim of public education but atleast his HEART is in the right place.

Link Posted: 10/24/2004 10:19:13 PM EST
dude what a flipfloper
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 10:21:45 PM EST
tag
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 10:33:37 PM EST
If it were'nt for that ski-slope nose and being a Democrat the brunette daughter is nailable!!!!! However, I thought she was Pre-Med!!!!! Thought they were all anti-Democrat more specifically anti Edwards, Anti trial lawyer, and anti escalating mal practice insurance??????? Isn't voting Republican good for BUSINESS???????????
Link Posted: 10/24/2004 11:05:40 PM EST
Good post

Have some with Pics but don't know how to post them, anyone want them to post?
Link Posted: 10/25/2004 12:13:44 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/25/2004 4:34:12 AM EST
This is a CLASSIC...wish they could run it every day 'til the election.
Link Posted: 10/25/2004 6:00:01 AM EST
A 2nd grade school teacher is explaining to her class that she is a liberal democrat. She says" If any of you are liberal democrats raise your hand". Now, not really knowing what a liberal democrate is, but wanting to please their teacher, all of the children raised their hands, except one. The teacher than made her way to little Jeffrey, and said,"Don't you want to be a liberal democrate too?" "No." he quickly replied. "Why not ?" the teacher asked. Jeffrey than replied " Both my parents are right wing Libertarians, so, I am too." The teacher than visibly angry at this unexpected response said," Well what if both your parents were morons, then what would you be?" Little Jeffrey thought about it for a second or two, and then said," Well , I guess I would be a liberal democrate."
PS Not long after that, little Jeffrey started getting home schooled.
Based on a true story
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