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Posted: 8/13/2011 6:09:42 AM EDT
If Arfcom were to do a quality remake iof the much beloved move...with better historical references tot eh actual battle, who would be your "Dream Team"?
(Producer, director actors?)

My one choice: Christian Bale as Color Sergeant Frank Bourne





and as King Cetshwayo.... Mel Gibson...since you know, he hates the English...
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:19:34 AM EDT
IN
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:24:12 AM EDT
Let's not give them any ideas.
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:26:15 AM EDT
JJ Abrams give it a sci-fi twist lots of lens flare. Bring on Michael Bay as a consultant lots of shit exploding for no reason. A cast of hot trendy 20 somethings flirting with their sexuality. Ok I'll stop
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:27:27 AM EDT
every time some dipshit in Hollywood thinks about remaking a classic he should have a cattle prod shoved 3 feet up his ass.


Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:28:08 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/13/2011 6:30:29 AM EDT by SD307]
I HATE BALE. His acting is mediocre at best he has simply chosen outstanding roles.

You should also look into the battle of Blood River (Weenen).

Most of the cast from lock stock and 2 smoking barrels would be my first choice (and they are all British) Russell Brand would make a good fit for the soldier in the hospital who spends the first 25% of the film trying to break into the medicinal Gin.


To do it right it needs to be a two parter with part one being Isandlwana. You could not make the film today to many would cry racist.

Do you really think someone could do better than this?

Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:31:00 AM EDT
Blooming Welshies.

Just kidding, I love them really.


Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:33:15 AM EDT
Regardless of who ever else is in it, it should have Jeff Bridges in a staring role. He's so much better an actor than Michael Caine
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:44:54 AM EDT

Originally Posted By grumpycoconut:
Regardless of who ever else is in it, it should have Jeff Bridges in a staring role. He's so much better an actor than Michael Caine

Hah!

Michael Caine should, at least, have a cameo in it.

I agree, all Brits for the cast. I'd also like to see it be more historically correct. Hook, for example, was not a slimeball.
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:49:13 AM EDT
They would never make a movie today about Europeans fighting natives in Africa without PCing the fuck out of it and demonizing the British Empire.
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 6:53:35 AM EDT
You people are on methamphetamine if you think Hollywood should remake Zulu.

Hollywood back then could make a good movie.

2011 Hollywood would remake Zulu into a story about how a multi-ethnic, multi-lingual group of homosexuals and trans-gendered people got together to play soccer and build a bridge to deliver AIDS relief to a village of single mothers.
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 7:50:07 AM EDT
Just do not change the song:

Men of Harlech stop your dreaming
Can't you see their spear points gleaming
See their warrior pennants streaming
To this battlefield
Men of Harlech stand ye steady
It cannot be ever said ye
For the battle were not ready
Welshmen never yield
From the hills rebounding
Let this song be sounding
Summon all at Cambria's call
The mighty force surrounding
Men of Harlech on to glory
This will ever be your story
Keep these burning words before ye
Welshmen will not yield
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:01:34 AM EDT
Blackhawk Down
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:01:43 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Cromlech:
Blooming Welshies.

Just kidding, I love them really.




Well there is your answer right there!
REmake it, except make it modern and in Afghanistan.
A small FOB near the pakistani border finds itself surrounded by Talibs outnumbered 40 to 1. Help is on the way but they have to hold out for 24 hours.

The Talibans high above the cliffs start singing and taunting them.

"OH wicked Kaffir! WE make Bacha Bazi out of you! we love the hairless pale buttocks of British soldier!"

Two Welch soldiers near the sandbags hear the taunting.........

"You hear that Jonesy? A lot 'o poofters! We're for it now!!"

Jonesy is a rough and ready Chav who had two choices join the army or end up in porridge! He gets mad and jumps on the ramparts.

"OI! Hadji! right 'ere mate! Any wog comes near me gets a leek shoved up his arse boyo! I was on the rugby team at school, I have Iron buttocks, any willies try it and they get broken off when i squeeze! Saavy?"


After the battle Private Jones is de-rated by Nato command because he was culturally insensitive.
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:01:59 AM EDT
Actually:


In the movie, the Zulu warriors encircled the English and stood just beyond rifle range. They started rhythmically pounding their shields with their assegais and chanting, "U-su-thu… U-su-thu…” the name of the Zulu royal house. The effect was electrifying. It was one of the great moments in cinematic history.

and

Monday, April 4, 2011

USUTHU!


More Zulus! I finally finished a whole unit of them! I’ve been back and forth about what size to make these units. It’s going to be 10, 15, or 20 – mostly because I can neatly fit them in rows of 10 in the storage drawers… sad, perhaps, but that’s the way I am. I had toyed with the idea of having the unmarried units (such as these below) in units of 20 and the married warriors in units of 15, but I think I’ve more or less settled on units of 15 (but I guess that could change depending on the scenario – benefits of singly based figures!). Ten seems too few to represent formation of company or battalion size. Twenty would just be WAAAAAY too many toys to paint.

More rambling on the Zulu War shortly…

(Remember: click on the pictures for a bigger version)



These are unmarried warriors from Wargames Foundry. The spears and shields are separate, which makes for a pain in the butt to put together, but also makes form some lively, animated figures!




Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:04:02 AM EDT
Love that movie.

"I'll have my man clean your kit."

Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:21:21 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/13/2011 8:28:39 AM EDT
Do your tunic up. Where do you think you are, man?
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