Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
Member Login
Site Notices
11/22/2017 10:05:29 PM
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 2
Posted: 10/22/2004 6:09:17 AM EST
Its a re-occuring nightmare:

I go out to a bar. Some girl who's looks would normally put her out of my league, wants me to take her home. She is adamant about going to "HER" place. Which of course I do. We go into her bedroom, which contains a large closet with slat-type doors. We have sex on the bed, which is about 4 feet from the closet. After a few minutes of rest, she wants to handcuff me. I let her cuff one hand to the bed post. I am still naked. At that point, she gets up and beginns getting dressed. So, of course I ask, "where the hell are you going?" Home, she replies. "Come here and uncuff me"--she ignores me and leaves. A few minutes later, I hear movement from inside the closet. This of course is very troubling, because whatever is making the noise was in there the whole time. Then, without warning, the closet doors open, and some guy in a Batman outfit comes out. Of course I start trying to kick him, and hit him with my free hand. But he is much bigger than me, and eventually I am subdued. Batman starts undressing . . . . then I wake up.


WTF??

I've had this nighmare a few times over the last few months. I cannot figure it out. Maybe this is devine punishment for being homophobic . . .

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:10:52 AM EST
Your gay.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:11:04 AM EST
IBTL
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:11:23 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:12:02 AM EST
This is an urban legend. Heard it before in college, except it was Superman.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:12:16 AM EST
thats pretty sick.......maybe you should think about trying to get a gun in your dream.....
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:12:43 AM EST

Originally Posted By JPPJ:
Its a re-occuring nightmare:

I go out to a bar. Some girl who's looks would normally put her out of my league, wants me to take her home. She is adamant about going to "HER" place. Which of course I do. We go into her bedroom, which contains a large closet with slat-type doors. We have sex on the bed, which is about 4 feet from the closet. After a few minutes of rest, she wants to handcuff me. I let her cuff one hand to the bed post. I am still naked. At that point, she gets up and beginns getting dressed. So, of course I ask, "where the hell are you going?" Home, she replies. "Come here and uncuff me"--she ignores me and leaves. A few minutes later, I hear movement from inside the closet. This of course is very troubling, because whatever is making the noise was in there the whole time. Then, without warning, the closet doors open, and some guy in a Batman outfit comes out. Of course I start trying to kick him, and hit him with my free hand. But he is much bigger than me, and eventually I am subdued. Batman starts undressing . . . . then I wake up.


WTF??

I've had this nighmare a few times over the last few months. I cannot figure it out. Maybe this is devine punishment for being homophobic . . .




so, she had teeth?


not a shrink, but that's bad. real bad.

now can anyone explain why my glock keeps malfunctioning in my dreams?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:13:06 AM EST
Did Batman have a camera? If so you know he's going to post pics!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:14:08 AM EST
This story was common knoweledge when I was in the Navy 20 years ago!

(In the version I heard) It took place in Australia, the guy hears, "Nana nana nana BATMAN!" from the closet. His rectum gets split, and he ends up with the ship nick name of "Old Two Stitch".
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:14:22 AM EST

Originally Posted By druncuncas:

not a shrink, but that's bad. real bad.

now can anyone explain why my glock keeps malfunctioning in my dreams?



I have that one too. I think that it is to make up for the lack of Glock's that malfunction in real life.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:14:43 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:17:25 AM EST
Thank you for sharing. Would you mind standing as far away from me as humanly possible? Thanks.

Remember the Alamo, and God Bless Texas...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:19:52 AM EST

Originally Posted By DoubleFeed:

Originally Posted By druncuncas:
Originally Posted By JPPJ:
Its a re-occuring nightmare:


now can anyone explain why my glock keeps malfunctioning in my dreams?

You need to practice more with it. You aren't confident enough that it will work when you need it.



hmm. never had that dream when i was shooting once a week vs twice a year now.

good call!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:21:08 AM EST
Young Robin says -
"Stop denying the inner you!"
"Your here and you're queer"
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:22:06 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:24:19 AM EST
I'm gonna report you to the president. You're obviously one o' them deviated preverts trying to lead a revolution of preverts.

Well...you're not gonna get away with it. Me and this here rifle says so.

We believe in God and America.

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:28:03 AM EST
Yeah sometimes it's batman, sometimes spiderman, sometimes tarzan it's all good baby!! Bare back baby! just like getting a rug burn! Eventually you build up a callous .
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:33:40 AM EST
Me thinks you be hiding in the closet
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:37:47 AM EST
I don't know why I even clicked on this thread.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:47:11 AM EST

Originally Posted By wedge1082:
Your gay.



A most definate +1 to that comment.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 6:58:24 AM EST
I suggest you stay away from the Scary Military Base Stories as I posted this military Urban legend there about a month ago. Its always an LT just out of some training course.

Or your Queer Ass Folk

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:15:03 AM EST
wow, sounds like you just need to get layed

­

b­y a guy

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:28:22 AM EST
you need to listen to the Wesley Willis song "I whooped batman's ass"
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:35:46 AM EST
Which Batman is it? ADAM WEST??

Or Clooney?

Either way, your gay.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:40:23 AM EST
You're a closet "catcher", get used to it.
We see that you're in Tx, stay there please.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:45:29 AM EST

Originally Posted By JPPJ:
Its a re-occuring nightmare:

I go out to a bar. Some girl who's looks would normally put her out of my league, wants me to take her home. She is adamant about going to "HER" place. Which of course I do. We go into her bedroom, which contains a large closet with slat-type doors. We have sex on the bed, which is about 4 feet from the closet. After a few minutes of rest, she wants to handcuff me. I let her cuff one hand to the bed post. I am still naked. At that point, she gets up and beginns getting dressed. So, of course I ask, "where the hell are you going?" Home, she replies. "Come here and uncuff me"--she ignores me and leaves. A few minutes later, I hear movement from inside the closet. This of course is very troubling, because whatever is making the noise was in there the whole time. Then, without warning, the closet doors open, and some guy in a Batman outfit comes out. Of course I start trying to kick him, and hit him with my free hand. But he is much bigger than me, and eventually I am subdued. Batman starts undressing . . . . then I wake up.


WTF??

I've had this nighmare a few times over the last few months. I cannot figure it out. Maybe this is devine punishment for being homophobic . . .




Don't listen to them JPPJ....I have that dream all the time and I'm fine...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:45:51 AM EST
In the last Batman movie they put nipples on the bat suit, which sent hundreds of closet grundle punchers into a downward spiral. You're not alone. I think there is a support group out there for guys like you. Time to look for an apartment in San Francisco there Boy Wonder!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:47:42 AM EST

Originally Posted By wedge1082:
Your gay.





Amazing how two little words can be so accurately descriptive!

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:54:16 AM EST
[Last Edit: 10/22/2004 7:54:36 AM EST by mjohn3006]
What ammo and firearm would be best for fighting an anal raping zombie batman?


Oh that smells like a sig line.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:54:51 AM EST
Batman changed his name.

I didn't read the rest.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:56:37 AM EST
I heard a guy tell a story like that. It actually happened.
Seems she tied him to the bed and then she crawled up and shit on him then started spanking the turd with a tennis raquet.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:57:43 AM EST
It could be worse.

You could have the same dream, except YOU'RE Batman...

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 7:57:49 AM EST

Originally Posted By Hokie:

grundle punchers








Thanks. I think I just sharted.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:00:37 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:01:20 AM EST

Originally Posted By cmjohnson:
www.home.zonnet.nl/sflight/images/batdick.jpg

I don't THINK this is a CC violation....but if it is, someone just let me know and I'll change the content, pronto.

CJ






RUN! RUN AWAY!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:05:46 AM EST
[Last Edit: 10/22/2004 8:07:37 AM EST by mjohn3006]

Originally Posted By cmjohnson:
www.home.zonnet.nl/sflight/images/batdick.jpg

I don't THINK this is a CC violation....but if it is, someone just let me know and I'll change the content, pronto.

CJ



Thats bigger than the ARFCOM penis!!!!

Batdick.jpg Now thats funny I don't care who you are thats funny right there

Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:06:13 AM EST

Originally Posted By rn45:
I'm gonna report you to the president. You're obviously one o' them deviated preverts trying to lead a revolution of preverts.

Well...you're not gonna get away with it. Me and this here rifle says so.

We believe in God and America.

mywebpages.comcast.net/unwind5/prevert.jpg



Now look, Colonel Batguano, if that really is your name...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:09:49 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 8:33:33 AM EST

Originally Posted By brouhaha:
You're gay. Get used to it.

And stay away from me.



Gayness . . . .where's the Eric Estrada pic?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 9:02:17 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 9:08:22 AM EST
[Last Edit: 10/22/2004 9:12:35 AM EST by Cincinnatus]

Originally Posted By JPPJ:
I go out to a bar. Some girl who's looks would normally put her out of my league, wants me to take her home. She is adamant about going to "HER" place. Which of course I do. We go into her bedroom, which contains a large closet with slat-type doors. We have sex on the bed, which is about 4 feet from the closet. After a few minutes of rest, she wants to handcuff me. I let her cuff one hand to the bed post. I am still naked. At that point, she gets up and beginns getting dressed. So, of course I ask, "where the hell are you going?" Home, she replies. "Come here and uncuff me"--she ignores me and leaves. A few minutes later, I hear movement from inside the closet. This of course is very troubling, because whatever is making the noise was in there the whole time. Then, without warning, the closet doors open, and some guy in a Batman outfit comes out. Of course I start trying to kick him, and hit him with my free hand. But he is much bigger than me, and eventually I am subdued. Batman starts undressing . . . . then I wake up.



This is your dream, huh?
All the time, huh?

Hmmmm....


Diagnosis:

Gay.

Here's why...
You see, this is actually an urban myth. Many of us have heard it before. You're not telling the truth.
You posted this PRETENDING that you have this dream of being raped by a guy in a Batman suit.
You didn't actually HAVE this dream, you are just PRETENDING that you did, as an excuse to discuss gay sex.
Which begs the question: why?

Why do you enjoy beginning a discussion about gay sex.
Why lie as a means to begin such a discussion?
I suspect that this lie is mirror in the lie you live every day.
You are gay.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 9:13:00 AM EST

Originally Posted By Dolomite:
This story was common knoweledge when I was in the Navy 20 years ago!

(In the version I heard) It took place in Australia, the guy hears, "Nana nana nana BATMAN!" from the closet. His rectum gets split, and he ends up with the ship nick name of "Old Two Stitch".



Bingo!
That story is still floating around.
Heard it when I was in the Corps about 6 years ago on an op in Australia.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 9:14:59 AM EST
Exactly.
So why pretend that it happened?

It's merely an excuse to initiate a discussion about gay sex.

JPPJ is probably down there in Texas reading this, with his pants around his ankles.
He ain't no "steer", that's for sure.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 10:02:30 AM EST

Originally Posted By Cincinnatus:
Exactly.
So why pretend that it happened?

It's merely an excuse to initiate a discussion about gay sex.

JPPJ is probably down there in Texas reading this, with his pants around his ankles.
He ain't no "steer", that's for sure.




No, actually he is reading this and LOL at the responses. Yes, I did make it up; or, rather I sole the idea from the urban myth you guys spoke of. The anti-JPPJ/you're a fag responses are funny as hell . . . .
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 10:23:31 AM EST

Originally Posted By JPPJ:

The anti-JPPJ/you're a fag responses are funny as hell . . .



No, they're not.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 10:35:06 AM EST
fag



(yes they are)
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 10:49:10 AM EST
[Last Edit: 10/22/2004 10:49:43 AM EST by DK-Prof]

Originally Posted By StonerStudent:

Don't listen to them JPPJ....I have that dream all the time and I'm fine...









Listen to StonerStudent !
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 10:59:59 AM EST
"Holy fucking faggot Batman!"
"Holy gays and fags Batman!"
"Holy Homosexual Batman!"

"You mean!?" "Precisily, Robin...he's gay!"

Pick anyone you want. As much as I hate to say this, have him stuff it in your pooper and post pics! Shit, thats so wrong and I know...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:08:55 AM EST
Seriously, though, why would you ever let someone you don't know handcuff you!?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:29:37 AM EST

Originally Posted By ClayP:
This is an urban legend. Heard it before in college, except it was Superman.



The Man of Steel? Ouch that would be much worse!

Or how about the Hulk?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 12:16:36 PM EST
You have gay rape/domination fantasies...

Go buy a Batman outfit (it's Oct, shouldn't be too hard) and go to your local gay club, I am sure you will be a hit.
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 2
Top Top