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Posted: 3/15/2001 5:44:34 PM EDT

Woman shot in head with ar15 and lives...

(the actual AP News headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws,
and while there, she went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries.
Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with
her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.
One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and
walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and
she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied
that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her
brains in for over an hour.
The man called the paramedics, who broke into he car because the doors
were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.
When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough
on the back of her head.
Apparently a Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat,
making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough
hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what
it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially
passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for
over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid. And yes...
Linda is a blonde.

I know a few woman that have dough for brains too... [;)]

realist out
Link Posted: 3/15/2001 6:34:03 PM EDT
I love that story...
One that really happened to me...
My crew was getting off the night shift at Target, and this woman was outside in her new Sports Ute. She asked if we could help her. It seems her 4 wheel drive wasn't working. So we shifted it in and out and finally determined it was in 4X4. She protested that we were wrong, because the other four wheels hadn't dropped.
Some people you cannot believe.
Link Posted: 3/15/2001 6:52:51 PM EDT
Try this one

Woman outside Holiday store Stoped me and asked how much oil her car should take. I told her it should only hold five quarts max. She told me she had already put in twelve and she still couldn't see it up the neck of the valve cover.Yes,she did have 17 quarts in the motor. Yes I did want to wait to watch her hubby arive after she called and
Yes she was BLONDE.

Link Posted: 3/15/2001 11:51:40 PM EDT
And you guys wonder how people could be stupid enough to vote for Al Gore and some of the congress critters they do! The funny one i saw was a talk show where they were interviewing a farmer, The topic was Agricultural subsidies!After the farmer made a statement about the subsidies, a woman stood up and said "well i still don't see why farmers need subsidies, who cares if farmers go out of business!" The commentator asked "well mam' where do you think your food comes from?" and lady's reply was "mine doesn't come from a farm i get it at the supermarket!" to which the farmer said where do you think the supermarket gets it?" the ladys reply was "from the back of the store, where else!" DUHHHHHHHH! I almost fell out of my seat laughing!
Link Posted: 3/16/2001 12:43:51 AM EDT
Hmmm, I guess I got suckered when I bought those Pillsbury loads for the Benelli. The guy claimed they were good. I guess he meant for eatin... yikes

P.s. I guess they won't cycle the auto well.... if so I could spray my opponents with buttermilk and honey goodness. MMMMMM... that might stop ME though

[red]Wait I'M PoppinFresh!!!... It wasn't me!!![/red][smoke]
Link Posted: 3/16/2001 2:25:14 AM EDT
Anti Personnel Biscuits...

You wonder how some people remember to wake up every morning.  
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 11:55:48 AM EDT
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 12:22:58 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 12:35:01 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 1:14:04 PM EDT
The lady holding her brains in story is an urban legend!!!

But this one isn't.  A woman sued a company that makes spemicidal jelly because she got pregnant after she used it, and besides, it tasted awful on toast.
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 4:03:56 PM EDT
Good one realist.  Sounds like one of my neighbors...
Link Posted: 4/15/2001 4:19:38 PM EDT
The story you have heard is true, the names were changed to protect the inocent.
Link Posted: 4/16/2001 7:14:37 AM EDT
some people are so stupid. these are the kind of people that think dougnuts have pecans.
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