Woman calls cops after buying “fake” cocaine

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Woman calls cops after buying “fake” cocaine

Posted: 8/13/2007 11:55:28 AM EDT

Woman calls cops after buying “fake” cocaine

By CINDY BISHOP

[email protected]

ROCHELLE — Do drug dealers issue gift cards if their buyers aren’t satisfied with the product?

Apparently a Rochelle woman thought so when she called the local police to help “get her money back” after she was unhappy with the crack cocaine she had bought Thursday night.

Juanita Marie Jones, 53, of 957 Gordon St. called Rochelle Police late Thursday night after she purchased what she thought was a $20 piece of crack cocaine, she said.

She told officers she broke the rock into three pieces and smoked one, only to discover the rock was “fake.” She told Officer Joel Quinn and Deputy John Shedd of the Wilcox County Sheriff’s Office that she wanted them to get her money back.

Jones took the officers into her kitchen and showed them the alleged “fake” rock at which time they arrested her on charges of possession of cocaine.

She was taken to the Rochelle Police Department where she is awaiting a bond hearing.

http://www.cordeledispatch.com/local/local_story_223195348.html

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:01:06 PM EDT

[#1]

Ya gotta love stupid crooks!

The only thing that would have made it better is if instead of calling the cops, she would have shown up at the jail on her own in handcuffs with the faux-crack in hand and relayed the story there.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:01:50 PM EDT

[#2]

stupid hurts.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:02:16 PM EDT

[#3]

If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:02:34 PM EDT

[#4]

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:07:26 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

You can be arrested for possession of something that looks like drugs, like the "weed" they sell on the internet that looks like weed but isn't weed at all. I think the charge is the same.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:09:53 PM EDT

[#6]

we should legalize fake crack to put all the fake crack dealers out of business

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:11:30 PM EDT

[#7]

"Hey man, this shit won't get a fly high...!"

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:18:30 PM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

Yeah, how can fake cocaine be illegal. Maybe she had some real coke stashed away somewhere.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:20:01 PM EDT

[#9]

Crack doesn't smoke itself people.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:22:13 PM EDT

[#10]

I aint never gonna give that bitch her money back

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:23:15 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

Yeah, how can fake cocaine be illegal. Maybe she had some real coke stashed away somewhere.

How are the officers supposed to know that the crack is fake?

And I think purchasing/selling fake look alike drugs is illegal in a lot of places too

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:24:11 PM EDT

[#12]

woman is stupid in this case

I once heard a nice young man on the witness stand under oath testify that the victim of the assault case being tried, stole "a lid of primo dope" from him prior to the beatdown.

The resulting laughter almost got the courtroom cleared.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:29:40 PM EDT

[#13]

What about the Dealer?

Any charges brought against him?

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:34:14 PM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

Yeah, how can fake cocaine be illegal. Maybe she had some real coke stashed away somewhere.

How are the officers supposed to know that the crack is fake?

And I think purchasing/selling fake look alike drugs is illegal in a lot of places too

See, I think there's where the burden of proof and presumption of innocence over guilty comes in.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:34:18 PM EDT

[#15]

she sound's like a winner

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:48:43 PM EDT

[#16]

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:53:38 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

Yeah, how can fake cocaine be illegal. Maybe she had some real coke stashed away somewhere.

How are the officers supposed to know that the crack is fake?

And I think purchasing/selling fake look alike drugs is illegal in a lot of places too

Field testing kits, maybe?

Maybe it was just heavily cut, and when it had a small trace of it in there, they nabbed her.

In any case, I agree, busting someone for something that looks like dope but isn't is fucking stupid. Why even bother issuing the field test kits if it is permissible to arrest people for that anyway? Just goes to show that the War on Drugs is about control, not saving lives.

Posted: 8/13/2007 12:55:27 PM EDT

[#18]

dammit the chinese are bootlegging cocaine too?! ACOGs were bad enough... now i have to check my blow for authenticity...

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:00:59 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

You can be arrested for possession of something that looks like drugs, like the "weed" they sell on the internet that looks like weed but isn't weed at all. I think the charge is the same.

It's not that simple.

Basically, if it looks like drugs and you say it is, then you can be arrested for intent or conspiracy. That’s how people who deal fake dope still get arrested.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:01:27 PM EDT

[#20]

nevermind - question already answered

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:04:14 PM EDT

[#21]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

You can be arrested for possession of something that looks like drugs, like the "weed" they sell on the internet that looks like weed but isn't weed at all. I think the charge is the same.

It's not that simple.

Basically, if it looks like drugs and you say it is, then you can be arrested for intent or conspiracy. That’s how people who deal fake dope still get arrested.

I read once somewhere

that if you were to take the shavings from a pencil sharpener and sell the stuff as pot, the police can arrest you for selling dope even if the stuff is fake. It was something about criminal intent.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:06:20 PM EDT

[#22]

Yep. In Texas it's called a "simulated substance".

I had someone pull over and flag me down the other night because he was drunk and didn't know where he was..... Needless to say I helped him figure it out.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:07:31 PM EDT

[#23]

Quoted:

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

You can be arrested for possession of something that looks like drugs, like the "weed" they sell on the internet that looks like weed but isn't weed at all. I think the charge is the same.

It's not that simple.

Basically, if it looks like drugs and you say it is, then you can be arrested for intent or conspiracy. That’s how people who deal fake dope still get arrested.

I read once somewhere

that if you were to take the shavings from a pencil sharpener and sell the stuff as pot, the police can arrest you for selling dope even if the stuff is fake. It was something about criminal intent.

Like I said, if your intent is illegal, then it will likely not matter what actualy happens.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:09:35 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
If it was fake, how was she arrested for possession?

Not that she certainly shouldn't be in jail, just something that crossed my mind.

The pipe she used has residue and is a crime to own.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:15:06 PM EDT

[#25]

I wholeheartedly support the selling of fake drugs to dumb junkies. The fake drug dealer should get a pat on the back.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:16:25 PM EDT

[#26]

Anyone ever see the episode of cops where a women flags down a cop because someone took $20 from her and gave her a piece of plaster.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:16:27 PM EDT

[#27]

That's why they call it dope.

Colonel Hurtz

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:19:17 PM EDT

[#28]

There was a story about some local guy who called the cops on a guy for stealing 5 lbs of marijuana and a shotgun.

Oddly enough, they caught the thief, and recovered the stolen shotgun, which had been reported stolen by three different people.

No honor among thieves I guess.

Posted: 8/13/2007 1:22:42 PM EDT

[#29]

this is why abortion should have been an option for her...

Posted: 8/13/2007 2:10:18 PM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
Anyone ever see the episode of cops where a women flags down a cop because someone took $20 from her and gave her a piece of plaster.

Definitely not the first time this kind of thing has happened. You wouldn't believe how often people have actually tried doing this: "I loaned them money (for crack) and they haven't paid me back"BS or also..."I gave that man a TV/VCR/Car stereo/(stolen property) and he gave me this (fake crack). All I want is my property back..."

Sometimes I find myself wishing such acts of stupidity were actually capitol offenses (Boom/Boom!...Boom/Boom/Boom!...and a final boom! just for good measure.). It'd not only strengthen society and discourage other offenders, but save a few tax payer dollars to boot...

Nah...Just Kidding

....ammo's way too expensive these days...No kidding

...Hell half the fun is seeing the look on their faces when you take them in. (That deer in the headlights look...

) It's actually a bonus because not only do you get a (stupid) criminal or two off the street...they (the stupid criminals) usually end up tipping off the (usually not so stupid) sellers as well.

FlDiveCop71

Posted: 8/13/2007 2:11:37 PM EDT

[#31]

Posted: 8/13/2007 2:13:57 PM EDT

[#32]

she needs to be sterilized so she cannot breed.
Just noticed she is 53. Her ovaries are probably shriveled raisins by now

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Woman calls cops after buying “fake” cocaine

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