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10/20/2017 1:01:18 AM
9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 9/28/2005 8:40:01 PM EDT
As I was reminded in another thread I first started realizing my dad was getting older when he needed reading glasses when I was about 12 and he was 40. I remember thinking he looked so weird wearing them.

My dad was always the young, strong, country guy in the army that all the family came to for things. If something needed worked on they called him. If something needed roofed or construction done to it they called him. If someone needed help with a calf birth or anything farm/building related they asked for him. He also took the time to teach me the things he knew. He would hold the heavy stuff and I would turn the wrench.

Then one day when I was 20 he was retiring when I helped him move. It was the first time I ever saw the rough, redman chewing, sun ravaged man suggest that I take the heavy end of the appliances and furnature. The more I got to thinking about it I realized in just the past few months he had needed me for all kinds of stuff. We put a tow package on his pickup and for this job I held the heavy bastard up to the frame and he just bolted it on.

Now when I take leave and go home he even asks me to get on the roof and fix so and so because heights make him dizzy now. When you are a child you never think you will see the day until it creeps up on you and you are the man holding the heavy stuff and he turns the wrenches.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 8:48:16 PM EDT
Yeah, I posted on the other thread too, except its with my father's father.

I idolized him growing up but when I was a late teenager I realized I could carry a 5 gallon bucket or throw a bale of hay easier than he could. Now me and dad clean off his roof and clean out his gutters, instead of me and him.

Just a few weeks ago he asked me to hoist a 5 gallon bucket of fuel up for him to pour, and I almost slung it because there were only about 2 gallons in.

I'll cry a lot when he dies
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 8:57:42 PM EDT
He had polio as a child. So i've always been helping him out. Gald to be able to return the favor. After all, he put up with my shit for 18 years.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 9:09:24 PM EDT
Never had a father around the house to feel that way.

No my grandfather on the other hand....

He took us fishing every sunny Saturday when I was young. He'd come over and we go swimming, play on the forklifts at work, whatever...

I hit me about 5 years ago now he forgets things, and has a hard time getting around to do stuff...

He was a carpenter for many many years before he started his company.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 9:30:10 PM EDT
My grandfather is 86, and he doesn't need help with nothin'.

So he says.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 9:53:22 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/28/2005 9:54:59 PM EDT by Cope]
Dad just turned 60. I used to think 60 was ancient, but now realize that it has seemingly slipped up on us overnight. Back in the mid 70's, I clearly remember creating our new country homestead right out of the Foxfire book. He was so frugal, the Man dug a 40' deep well with a pick and shovel. I emptied the buckets of dirt as he pulled a rope up to me on a pulley. We built our log home from the trees off the property, and basically lived the simple life during my youth. Toughest Man I have ever known, and I love him dearly. He is still strong and very active with work, but I am becoming concerned about his memory. Grandma was conquered by Alzheimer's....

Excellent thread. Solidly put a lump in my throat that will likely be there when I awake in the morning.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 10:36:48 PM EDT
This woman I met had to go get her father, after he drove some distance with "the Club" still attached. She may have had a clue before that.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 10:51:54 PM EDT
My father died when he was 57 so we never got to that point.

Been 14 years and I still miss him every day.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 11:14:55 PM EDT
mine is over 50 years old, and still active duty. he doesn't need my help for nothing. hell, my grandfather is 76, and sometimes i think he's better off then i am. hard work ad staying in shape does wonders for people.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 11:27:31 PM EDT
I wish he was still here, calling me at 10:00pm with problems with his rain gutters or, more often, advising me that he was having problems with a regular bowel movement. Since 1998, when he passed away, I don't think I have gone more than 2 days without thinking of him, or what we had done together in the past. I know I haven't slept without an aclohol or pharmacological assisted sleep since then. I really need to get past this. It is difficult when you realize that you have become the "Older Generation" of the family.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 11:28:25 PM EDT
About the time he broke his leg. Everybody at the hospital said it was the most spectacular break they'd ever seen. Somewhere the photos, x-rays, reports, etc. went into some journal circulated through every hospital in the region.

Ever since, he hasn't been as mobile. Now add that he's gotten overweight, developing a hernia, his surgically-corrected vision is now worse than it was before, and he's just plain slowing down and wearing out. Heck, he actually tore his cornea a little over a month ago and couldn't even sneeze or turn his head quickly without damaging it, much less do anything strenuous.

And despite it all, he just keeps going.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 11:33:08 PM EDT
Alot lately. Hes 65 and his physical shape isn't what it was before. Seems like hes sick (cold & phlu type stuff) alot more lately too. Makes me really sad since I NEVER EVER want to make him feel like he's getting old but I have to at times because he won't fucking see a doctor for shit.
Link Posted: 9/28/2005 11:38:22 PM EDT
He's like what now..........67? Aside from being deaf now he's pretty much all there physically and mentally.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 2:34:04 AM EDT
My old man just turned 60 and he can still outwork me any day of the week.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 3:09:17 AM EDT
My Dad will turn 90 Christmas eve. All his life he has been extrememly healthy and fit. It has only been the past 5 years that he has had any problems. I had taken the Car away from him when he was 86 as his vision was not that good. Over the past 3 years he has declined, had prostate cancer and uses a wheel chair. His mind is razor sharp but he is worn out. He had been living in an assisted living facility but he has reach the point they can no longer help so he's going to go to an extended care facility. It's hard to see him the way he is today. Atleast we can still talk about things, old times, sports, grandchildren.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 3:22:03 AM EDT
just within the last couple of years. he still insists on doing things on his own no matter how hard it is for him but i notice he starts to act so unsure of himself sometimes. it rips my fucking heart out.

one thing i've noticed when we're out in public...our society shows zero respect for the elderly. i'm gonna gutshoot the next piece of shit scumbag punk who acts like he's doing my dad a favor waiting on him.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 8:19:57 AM EDT
Wow, what a melancholy thread.

When my Dad was about 70, I called him to talk, because I was going through a divorce, and I really wanted his advice.
I soon realized he couldn't hear me on the phone unless I yelled.

About 7 years later I went home for a visit, and he was wearing the oxygen tube around his nose.
I realized then that I needed to prepare myself for the time when he wouldn't be around.

He was able to mow his own grass and take care of half of the elderly people in town until he was 77, so he had a good life.

I miss him every day, but I'm looking forward to the time I'll see him again.
Then he'll be young and healthy, no glasses, and breathing just fine.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 8:24:45 AM EDT
Father turned 67 this year. Father in law turned 77 this year. Neither one asks for help based on their age, although I am accutely aware that my time left with either man is probably shorter than I care to admit.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 8:40:49 AM EDT
About two years ago when my dad began to forget little things like: his full glass by the couch that he'd inadvertently replace with another when he got up to get a snack, his wallet on the dresser, where his car keys were.
There was a time when he could keep a golf ball in sight from the clubface to the fairway. As of a year ago, my little brother rides in the cart with him so that he can spot his ball.

He used to be big into his yard and all the work that encompassed (lanscaping, mowing, etc.). Now he's less and less concerned with it (b/c he can't work as hard my mother has said).

At times I feel that old age gave my dad character (older people are characters in the sense that they are familiar with themselves and hence easygoing and easily recognizable); that it is something to be admired (his very humble beginnings), something we can laugh about, a process that's to be expected...

My grandparents were always "old" as long as I could remember so when they passed on, I was saddened, but their mortality was something I think was easier for me to come to terms with because of this.
I find that I'm having a difficult time accepting my father's aging...as my friend it poses as a reminder that i'm getting old myself.
Mostly though, it's because some day all i'm gonna have are memories.
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 8:43:19 AM EDT

Originally Posted By corwin1968:
My old man just turned 60 and he can still outwork me any day of the week.

Makes ya proud to be his son, don't it?
Link Posted: 9/29/2005 8:50:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/29/2005 8:52:18 AM EDT by Admiral_Crunch]
My dad's 62, and he still insists on being the one to really get his hands dirty when we're working on something together. He has some problems with his knees, so he has to be careful about kneeling on a hard surface, and he's worn glasses for about 15 years. Other than that, he's in damn fine shape. I'm very thankful for that, and I hope he's still with us for a very long time. His uncle lived to be 97, so maybe we have good genes. This thread got something stuck in my eye.

I need to lose some weight, or he's going to outlast me.
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