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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:21:17 PM EDT
For me, it was that if I did not study and go to college I would be a loser and would likely spend my life living under a bridge. What a crock. What have you got?
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:23:35 PM EDT
That school was NOT uphill both ways back in the day.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:24:10 PM EDT
Santa
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:24:40 PM EDT
If you eat a watermelon seed then a watermelon will grow in your belly......terrified me
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:03 PM EDT
Girls don't like it when you pull their pigtails.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:19 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/14/2013 3:26:15 PM EDT by IcarusY625]
Father Christmas.

eta: dammit, easter bunny then....
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:37 PM EDT
That I would have hair on my palms by now.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:38 PM EDT
If you swallow chewing gum it stays in your stomach for seven years.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:57 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Cholla:
Girls don't like it when you pull their pigtails.


winning
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:13 PM EDT
God
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:17 PM EDT
shit would go on my permanent record
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:41 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Garby0331:
If you eat a watermelon seed then a watermelon will grow in your belly......terrified me


I was going to post this.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:27:21 PM EDT
If you keep jumpin on the heat vents. Monkeys will come out and get you


I hate monkeys to do this day
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:27:23 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/14/2013 3:27:45 PM EDT by Prae]
That the expansion grating on bridges was to let blind people know they are changing states.


Back story: a bridge we always crossed between MS & LA had one and my dad was full of shit. I was 5.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:02 PM EDT
Girls don't fart.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:35 PM EDT
Snipes
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:40 PM EDT
To trust people in authority because they have your best interests in heart!
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:29:13 PM EDT
Coffee is bad for you.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:29:57 PM EDT
Pot=heroin.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:00 PM EDT
I was told that it's OK to be poor. Uh no, it's not. Being poor is terrible. Stupid liberal educators!
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:16 PM EDT
The President is a role model
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:31 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Reload_em:
To trust people in authority because they have your best interests in heart!


This. FBHO
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:37 PM EDT
I was told by both my parents when I was growing up and getting bad grades that both of them were straight A students, come to find out from them not 6 months ago that both of them had lousy grades in school and they still deny ever telling me that they got good grades.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:49 PM EDT
If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:55 PM EDT
Toothfairy
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:17 PM EDT



You need to wait 30 minutes before swimming if you have just eaten.

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:29 PM EDT
The Kennedy's were the greatest family in America.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:34 PM EDT
Originally Posted By cayau:
For me, it was that if I did not study and go to college I would be a loser and would likely spend my life living under a bridge. What a crock. What have you got?


Perfect I don't have to type so much. College=joke

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By CJan_NH:
If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

I did cramp up from eating once in swimming class when I was ten-ish. Sucked.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:11 PM EDT
Always walk backwards when you're in the woods or the Indians will find you and take your hair.

Fuck my dad.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:26 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Johnny_Reno:



You need to wait 30 minutes before swimming if you have just eaten.




That shit was drilled into us

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:43 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Hunter-Killer:
Santa


What ? shut your whore mouth!
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:05 PM EDT
If you keep making that face it will stay that way forever.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:20 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Falcon09:
Snipes


Snipe
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:58 PM EDT
My dick would fall off if I kept touching it
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:00 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Fugitive:
Pot=heroin.


This one big time.

The DARE program we had made it seem like pot was heroin x10.

One smoke and you'd be living on the streets giving handjobs for smack.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:11 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Cossa:
shit would go on my permanent record


Yah, anybody actually hear or see one of those permanent records they
beat us over the head with all through school?

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:45 PM EDT
Mexico is a lovely place to vacation.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:37:31 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/14/2013 3:37:56 PM EDT by Hunter-Killer]
Originally Posted By soldier65:
Originally Posted By Hunter-Killer:
Santa


What ? shut your whore mouth!


Don't blame me....

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:38:05 PM EDT
That liquids were incompressible.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:38:11 PM EDT
Originally Posted By CJan_NH:
If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile


That was mine too.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By The_Rifleman:
Originally Posted By Falcon09:
Snipes


Snipe

That's not the kind of snipe the assholes told me I was hunting when I was 5.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:33 PM EDT
Religion.



Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:45 PM EDT
the tie under Colonel Sanders face on the KFC logo is his arms and legs.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:41:55 PM EDT
Originally Posted By cayau:
For me, it was that if I did not study and go to college I would be a loser and would likely spend my life living under a bridge. What a crock. What have you got?


This. and that crap about I can be whatever I want to be.

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:42:23 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/14/2013 3:44:34 PM EDT by VACaver]
That I could be anything I wanted.

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:42:51 PM EDT
Religious topics foisted on me by hypocrites whose hypocritical personal behaviors only became known to me later in my life.

If you're going to espouse a certain pattern of personal conduct, you shouldn't have a different set of rules for when you're out of town and no one from your church can see you engaging in a certain activity.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:43:02 PM EDT
The reason I never met my older brother, David, is because he didn't mind mom and dad, so they left him by the escalators at the mall.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:43:07 PM EDT
Jackalopes!

Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:44:09 PM EDT
Democrats also love America and have the nation's best interests at heart, they just have different ideas on how to get things done.
Link Posted: 3/14/2013 3:44:38 PM EDT
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