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Posted: 9/16/2009 8:05:28 AM EST
Before you read this understand that it is from a dream and being as such the iphone somehow had some magic teleportation ability.

In the dream, I misjudged where I wanted to go and the iphone teleported me directly next to a car with three shady looking guys. As soon as they spotted I was carrying an iphone they were interested in me. The first thing I thought of was my CCW only to realize I wasn't carrying at the time. As a result I started trying to use the phone to get me out of there only to have it start acting up (damn Apple). The driver got out of the car and approached me. He asked me what I was doing there and wanted to know if I could help.

Then (I know... I shouldn't have been standing so close to the car) the passenger got out, hitting me with the door as he exited and knocking me down. He had some sort of stick in his hand. He asked to see my iPhone. A third person was in the car but he did not exit. I did not know if any of them had a gun. Basically the first two guys continued to badger me until I could get the iphone running again and get me out of there.

I know it's silly, mainly considering that the iPhone has no teleportation ability. But I think it raised a valid question.

If I'm in a situation where I am outnumbered and I have no immediate exit, is my only choice to draw and hope for the best if I do have my CCW? What if I don't?
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:10:09 AM EST
First of all...never dream while not carrying.


Second if you are...Mag dump
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:13:10 AM EST
Wipe your ass with the iphone, then start flingin' poo.

Either they kick your ass and take the phone, or they write you off as a 5150.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:15:26 AM EST
You're going to be hit.

Try to keep one guy between you and the others.

Move, a lot.

Play for keeps. Your only hope is to remove one of them from the fight quickly.
This means Eyes, throat, groin, bladder are fair targets.
The fight will probably last about 3 seconds. you will either be dead, severely beaten, or will prevail.

If any of then are armed and you are not, you will more than likely be in serious doo doo.

If any of them has a knife, you will be cut.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:16:02 AM EST
Toss the iPhone at then, while at the same time drawing your CCW. Any sudden movements after that, take your chances. Fuck an iPhone, I would rather live.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:16:50 AM EST
Get naked and shit yourself.


Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:17:43 AM EST
"So they've got us surrounded, good! Now we can fire in any direction, those bastards won't get away this time!"
CHESTY PULLER, USMC
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:20:42 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/16/2009 8:32:22 AM EST by FTAggie]
edited for posterity
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:21:03 AM EST
It's a dream... Conjure up a couple Marines
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:23:03 AM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:23:34 AM EST
Originally Posted By Strykewolf:
It's a dream... Conjure up a couple Marines


BRILLIANT!
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:24:16 AM EST
press 911 on phone.

You should have installed telleport3.1 from the apps store, it automatcaly transports theives to jail when your ipone gets stolen.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:24:38 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/16/2009 8:26:44 AM EST by raysheen]
Yo Homie, is that my Iphone?

Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:25:06 AM EST
Something I learned in Karate (second degree blackbelt)....

Most people are sized and shaped such that the maximum number of people who can attack you from one direction, and actually have enough room to get close enough to hit you, is 4. Number on priority in a situation like this (if not armed) is to make sure you keep all of them in front of you. You will have to be light on your feet to accomplish this, but even a slow semi-fatty like me can do it so I'm sure you can.

Now, fighting four guys at once is tough, but it's not impossible either. You'll have to really be on top of your game and make sure you don't get to grappling with them.

And if you can find a stick or trash can lid, or some other object to wail the crap out of one of them with, do it. Thugs usually are after an easy market. Bust one up a bit and they'll probably look for less dangerous targets.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:25:11 AM EST
Originally Posted By dorobuta:
You're going to be hit.

Try to keep one guy between you and the others.

Move, a lot.

Play for keeps. Your only hope is to remove one of them from the fight quickly.
This means Eyes, throat, groin, bladder are fair targets.
The fight will probably last about 3 seconds. you will either be dead, severely beaten, or will prevail.

If any of then are armed and you are not, you will more than likely be in serious doo doo.

[div]If any of them has a knife, you will be cut.[/div]



This is also likely true if you have a knife in this scenario.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:26:09 AM EST
Originally Posted By FTAggie:
Originally Posted By arowneragain:
"So they've got us surrounded, good! Now we can fire in any direction, those bastards won't get away this time!"
CHESTY PULLER, USMC


Sounds like a porn name...


Chesty Puller was quite possibly the greatest Marine who ever lived.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:26:11 AM EST
or pop your hip mounted claymores.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:26:29 AM EST
Originally Posted By FTAggie:
Originally Posted By arowneragain:
"So they've got us surrounded, good! Now we can fire in any direction, those bastards won't get away this time!"
CHESTY PULLER, USMC


Sounds like a porn name...




When you get your foot back out of your mouth, read here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chesty_Puller


Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:26:57 AM EST
Hop over the car and run.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:28:14 AM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:28:20 AM EST
*Wyatt Earp Voice*
"The rest of you will get me in a rush, but not before I turn this bastard's head into a canoe!"

Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:29:01 AM EST
Immediately drop trou and begin jacking off screaming, "Who wants some! WHO WANTS SOME!?" while waving your unit around wildly.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:31:29 AM EST
Originally Posted By arowneragain:
Originally Posted By FTAggie:
Originally Posted By arowneragain:
"So they've got us surrounded, good! Now we can fire in any direction, those bastards won't get away this time!"
CHESTY PULLER, USMC


Sounds like a porn name...




When you get your foot back out of your mouth, read here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chesty_Puller




I looked it up after I said that. Apologies to the memory of Lt. General Puller.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:40:19 AM EST
In my dreams my iPhone can change itself into a terminator. Maybe that would work for your situation.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:40:59 AM EST
This is silly. Anyone who has ever watched a Kung Fu movie knows that bad guys only attack one at a time while the others patiently wait their turn.

One kick will send the bad guys spinning through the air and you're done.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:42:11 AM EST
Originally Posted By dorobuta:
You're going to be hit.

Try to keep one guy between you and the others.

Move, a lot.

Play for keeps. Your only hope is to remove one of them from the fight quickly.
This means Eyes, throat, groin, bladder are fair targets.
The fight will probably last about 3 seconds. you will either be dead, severely beaten, or will prevail.

If any of then are armed and you are not, you will more than likely be in serious doo doo.

If any of them has a knife, you will be cut.


+1

Stack your opponents, leave yourself room to run.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:51:10 AM EST
Throw a frag at your feet...
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:52:37 AM EST
Something between this...



...and this...
Originally Posted By ftwm:
http://i32.tinypic.com/xqc26p.jpg
...would work out well.

Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:53:12 AM EST
Pick one out and fubar him. Hopefully the others will take off.


If not, your fucked.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 8:58:04 AM EST
Do a barrel roll!
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:00:27 AM EST
I always summon a Dragon or Godzilla.... thats how I always beat my nightmares... But then sometimes... Godzilla is my nightmare and I cant even nuke em from orbit.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:04:04 AM EST


Martyrdom perk might be cheap, but it always works.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:06:13 AM EST
iphone teleport to Freebirds FTW!
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:06:14 AM EST
What to do when you're outnumbered in close proximity?


Yell: "He's got a gun!!!"

Then watch everyone scatter.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:08:59 AM EST
if unarmed either get out of there or go on the offensive and pre-empt their attack. eye gouge, fish hook, kick in the shins and balls, break noses, rip off ears there is no "fair fight"
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:10:18 AM EST
Re-enact the "I need guns, lots of guns" scene from the Matrix.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:13:18 AM EST
When surrounded my multiple opponents, identify the weakest one and devote all attack in the most ruthless fashion towards that one... if possible, break through any ring they have created in doing so.

Trying to dodge around and look for an opportunity takes time, time is on their side, as 3 against one gives better general odds to your enemy... the longer it goes, the more chance they have to overcome your skill and get in a lucky shot. Do not allow them to be comfortable. Absolutely brutalize the weakest one in an attempt to both break the circle and discourage any of the other opponents from approaching you. Do not wait, do not hesitate, let them see the lack of fear in your eyes and let them question whether they really have the advantage or not.

If you wait, the strongest will likely come forth, or the one with the most to prove. By choosing your opponent, you have already taken away their ability to act against you with the strongest.

If you can not escape in any way, after terrorizing the first, go on to the next weakest, or closest, and so on.

This has been a public service announcement paid for by angry paranoid people.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:13:44 AM EST
if you don't have a CCW and no way of escape, you can try to say something that severely disrupts their train of thought. people generally run scripts through their minds and try to predict how a conversation is going to go. we are creatures that operate off of patterns. stray from the victim pattern and some people will get very confused.

Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:20:48 AM EST
Go chimpy on them.

Jump, cling, bite face off.

Repeat as needed.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:22:12 AM EST


He said he didn't have a Glock
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:23:38 AM EST
Carry a claymore with you.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:24:10 AM EST
I always get put in shitty sitautions in my dreams.


But in real life, if it was just hand to hand vs 3 guys, I would try to avoid going to the ground. If you feel you cant escape, then your best bet is to close the distance and use the clinch to your advantage.

It would be harder for all of them to hit you at once in the clinch and hopefully you can take the first one out as fast as possible, thru elbows,knees, or uppercuts. Learn how to use the plum clinch effectively and any normal non-trainer person will have problems getting out, and they would put their head in a position for vicious knees, and if you have to pop them up you can throw a elbow.

You just have to be relentless in that situation.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:25:40 AM EST
What to do when you're outnumbered in close proximity?


Raise your arms up high so the nuts and bolts in your explosive vest won't be obstructed on their way out.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:30:25 AM EST
Hold Down Block and Hit Down Down Left A B B B A UP DOWN and yell "FINISH HIM" at the end.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:38:47 AM EST
You carry a second gun and dual wield.


Would someone please post a picture of that cop dual wielding?
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:40:25 AM EST
SHOOT

TO

SLIDELOCK

Repeat as necessary.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 9:46:11 AM EST
Originally Posted By schizrade:
Toss the iPhone at then, while at the same time drawing your CCW. Any sudden movements after that, take your chances. Fuck an iPhone, I would rather live.


you are forgetting that this iphone has a teleportation system

haha, this thread has potential to turn into a 1911/glock or beans or no beans thread, hell i think we have proven we can argue about anything.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 10:02:19 AM EST

Originally Posted By dawgm:
if you don't have a CCW and no way of escape, you can try to say something that severely disrupts their train of thought. people generally run scripts through their minds and try to predict how a conversation is going to go. we are creatures that operate off of patterns. stray from the victim pattern and some people will get very confused.


MARZIPAN DOORKNOBS!



FLOOKLE WONK WONK WONK!
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 10:04:10 AM EST
Blade @ 45 and draw down.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 10:06:27 AM EST
dream them into naked swedish triplets.

Then start wrasslin.
Link Posted: 9/16/2009 10:06:36 AM EST
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