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Posted: 12/25/2012 12:19:31 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 12:23:12 PM EDT by CWO]
Deadspin article: http://deadspin.com/5971049/what-did-we-get-stuck-in-our-rectums-this-year?utm_source=gizmodo.com&utm_medium=recirculation&utm_campaign=recirculation

The Sun Sentinel has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, Gizmodo trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity.



A small part of the list. Links to full list, full database and past years above:


Penis:
SPOON
PLASTIC ZIP TIE
FORKS
ORNAMENT
"PIECE OF TIMBER"
PEN
SODA CAN POP TOP

Vagina:
BEDPOST
"WAS DARED TO PUT A COSMETICS BOTTLE IN VAGINA"
TOY MICROPHONE STAND
SPOON
"COCK RING THAT BECAME DISLODGED"
METAL BAR
2 SPONGES
PIECE OF BASKETBALL SHORTS
SEWING NEEDLES
"PATIENT STATES SHE SLIPPED & FELL ONTO A TOY TRUCK WHILE CLEANING"
HAIRSPRAY CAP
TUB STOPPER
"12YOF GOING THROUGH MOM'S DRAWER, FOUND PENIS SHAPED 'PLEASURE ITEM,' EXPERIMENTING PUTTING IN HER VAGINA, COULDN'T GET OUT"

Rectum:
FRENCH BREAD
HAND WRENCH
CIGARETTE LIGHTER
CRAYON
"STUCK TOY IN RECTUM AND BROKE OFF, SAW MOM INSERT TAMPON AND MIMICKED"
VIAL OF BATH SALTS
ARTIFICIAL CHRISTMAS TREE BRANCH
DRUM STICK
VINEGAR BOTTLE
LOTION BOTTLE
MOUTHWASH BOTTLE
SHAMPOO BOTTLE
BABY BOTTLE
"LOOFA W/SUCTION CUP W/HOOK ATTACHED"


There are some funny examples added in the comments as well.

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:24:57 PM EDT
french bread?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:25:33 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 12:26:17 PM EDT by FrankDrebin]
Slipped and toy truck shot up her twat. Lol.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:25:48 PM EDT



soad can pop top .... no thanks
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:26:24 PM EDT
Thats a hell of a christmas shopping list.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:30:58 PM EDT
Originally Posted By FrankDrebin:
Slipped and toy truck shot up her twat. Lol.


That's never happened to you? Hell I fall on all sorts of things that end up stuck in my ass: vegetables, fruit, toys, cordless phone set to vibrate, etc.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:42:41 PM EDT
Originally Posted By EFB16ACRX:
french bread?


This technique was developed in France.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:45:20 PM EDT
That dude with the cockring was doing it wrong.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:46:11 PM EDT
IN!

I'm not sure that is the proper word to use this instance.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:48:42 PM EDT
Originally Posted By CLICKBANGBANG:
Originally Posted By EFB16ACRX:
french bread?


This technique was developed in France.


Oh yeah, French tickler
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:49:37 PM EDT
We had a lady come in who swallowed a thumb tack. She said she likes to chew on them.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:50:02 PM EDT
Insert here
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:53:10 PM EDT
Was that a real drumstick or a foul drumstick.....no matter....it was foul when they got it out.

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:54:14 PM EDT


FRENCH BREAD??



what in the great blue shit?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 12:54:31 PM EDT
One in a million shot doc, one in a million.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:02:32 PM EDT
Wow.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:02:41 PM EDT
Some people just know how to party.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:04:30 PM EDT
forkS!!!! with an S!
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:07:08 PM EDT
No shotgun shells?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:08:10 PM EDT
Originally Posted By nick89302:
Originally Posted By FrankDrebin:
Slipped and toy truck shot up her twat. Lol.


That's never happened to you? Hell I fall on all sorts of things that end up stuck in my ass: vegetables, fruit, toys, cordless phone set to vibrate, etc.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile


No, and I never managed to get a spoon stuck in my penis, either. I sort of hope it was the narrow end that got stuck, but if it was the other end, it would be fascinating in a horrific train wreck with explosions and dead, burnt bodies sort of way.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:09:46 PM EDT

Originally Posted By sigp226:
Originally Posted By nick89302:
Originally Posted By FrankDrebin:
Slipped and toy truck shot up her twat. Lol.


That's never happened to you? Hell I fall on all sorts of things that end up stuck in my ass: vegetables, fruit, toys, cordless phone set to vibrate, etc.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile


No, and I never managed to get a spoon stuck in my penis, either. I sort of hope it was the narrow end that got stuck, but if it was the other end, it would be fascinating in a horrific train wreck with explosions and dead, burnt bodies sort of way.

O....K.....
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:10:06 PM EDT
Originally Posted By edb66:
No shotgun shells?




ARFCOM still has the best people.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:10:45 PM EDT

Originally Posted By edb66:
No shotgun shells?


With respect to that Arfcom member - he never actually got them stuck.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:21:56 PM EDT

Originally Posted By KalihiJack:
Originally Posted By CLICKBANGBANG:
Originally Posted By EFB16ACRX:
french bread?


This technique was developed in France.


Oh yeah, French tickler
Or maybe it was a French Dip?

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:23:23 PM EDT
Google "concrete enema"

There 's also an x-ray pic online of some guy with a live 50mm shell lodged up his rectum.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:38:23 PM EDT
What brand was the hand wrench?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:41:11 PM EDT

Originally Posted By kcolg30:
What brand was the hand wrench?


Drill Doctor?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 1:42:31 PM EDT
Thread title made me think you were looking for confessions.

I had a list in my head of screennames I knew I would see in here.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:32:28 PM EDT
Healthcare dildo.


Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:34:58 PM EDT
Originally Posted By kcolg30:
What brand was the hand wrench?


SHAT-ON
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:35:13 PM EDT
Needles in vagina WTF????
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:37:28 PM EDT
Originally Posted By CWO:
Deadspin article: http://deadspin.com/5971049/what-did-we-get-stuck-in-our-rectums-this-year?utm_source=gizmodo.com&utm_medium=recirculation&utm_campaign=recirculation

The Sun Sentinel has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, Gizmodo trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity.



A small part of the list. Links to full list, full database and past years above:


Penis:
SPOON
PLASTIC ZIP TIE
FORKS
ORNAMENT
"PIECE OF TIMBER"
PEN
SODA CAN POP TOP

Vagina:
BEDPOST
"WAS DARED TO PUT A COSMETICS BOTTLE IN VAGINA"
TOY MICROPHONE STAND
SPOON
"COCK RING THAT BECAME DISLODGED"
METAL BAR
2 SPONGES
PIECE OF BASKETBALL SHORTS
SEWING NEEDLES
"PATIENT STATES SHE SLIPPED & FELL ONTO A TOY TRUCK WHILE CLEANING"
HAIRSPRAY CAP
TUB STOPPER
"12YOF GOING THROUGH MOM'S DRAWER, FOUND PENIS SHAPED 'PLEASURE ITEM,' EXPERIMENTING PUTTING IN HER VAGINA, COULDN'T GET OUT"

Rectum:
FRENCH BREAD
HAND WRENCH
CIGARETTE LIGHTER
CRAYON
"STUCK TOY IN RECTUM AND BROKE OFF, SAW MOM INSERT TAMPON AND MIMICKED"
VIAL OF BATH SALTS
ARTIFICIAL CHRISTMAS TREE BRANCH
DRUM STICK
VINEGAR BOTTLE
LOTION BOTTLE
MOUTHWASH BOTTLE
SHAMPOO BOTTLE
BABY BOTTLE
"LOOFA W/SUCTION CUP W/HOOK ATTACHED"


There are some funny examples added in the comments as well.



So this is when your x-ray vision comes in handy...
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:40:08 PM EDT


Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:42:16 PM EDT
my buddies GF works in a hospital and she said they see some pretty weird stuff, She said they had one person come it with a light bulb stuck up their rectum and another had fish hooks in their penis.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:42:43 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 2:44:56 PM EDT by Erevis]
ARFCOM is slipping.


VIAL OF BATH SALTS


...in the rectum.


What unholy blasphemy of a zombie will THAT create?

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:45:45 PM EDT
Originally Posted By dubBinSEA:



soad can pop top .... no thanks


You gotta work your way up to it. After several years of docking you should be able to insert a soda can pop top no problem.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 2:45:49 PM EDT

Originally Posted By CWO:

Rectum:

VINEGAR BOTTLE


One man, one jar vinegar bottle?
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:05:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By savageoneseven:

Originally Posted By CWO:

Rectum:

VINEGAR BOTTLE


One man, one jar vinegar bottle?


I suppose you could work your way up to more than one....
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:27:58 PM EDT
Originally Posted By kcolg30:
What brand was the hand wrench?


He was just trying to tighten his nuts and the handle slipped.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:28:42 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 3:29:28 PM EDT by RogueSpear2023]
I knew a girl in HS that was playing with a D cell battery and got it stuck and had to go to the ER to have it removed. She was actually dumb enough to tell people at school so she could be forever known as D cell.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:29:54 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 3:30:10 PM EDT by uglygun]
Originally Posted By KingAirDriver:

Originally Posted By KalihiJack:
Originally Posted By CLICKBANGBANG:
Originally Posted By EFB16ACRX:
french bread?


This technique was developed in France.


Oh yeah, French tickler
Or maybe it was a French Dip?



Yeah, I know where she got the roast beef for it.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:30:59 PM EDT

Originally Posted By nick89302:
Originally Posted By FrankDrebin:
Slipped and toy truck shot up her twat. Lol.


That's never happened to you? Hell I fall on all sorts of things that end up stuck in my ass: vegetables, fruit, toys, cordless phone set to vibrate, etc.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

Funny, I got a whole cordless drill, spare battery and case up my butt hole, by slipping on it
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:35:36 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:41:59 PM EDT
i know a lady who's a xray tech, she says around here it's lightbulbs
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:42:16 PM EDT

Originally Posted By RogueSpear2023:
I knew a girl in HS that was playing with a D cell battery and got it stuck and had to go to the ER to have it removed. She was actually dumb enough to tell people at school so she could be forever known as D cell.


I'm guessing that she misses the Reunions.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:44:30 PM EDT
Originally Posted By CWO:

Originally Posted By RogueSpear2023:
I knew a girl in HS that was playing with a D cell battery and got it stuck and had to go to the ER to have it removed. She was actually dumb enough to tell people at school so she could be forever known as D cell.


I'm guessing that she misses the Reunions.


Her personality is... electric!

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:47:07 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 3:52:02 PM EDT by brucers99]
They're doing it wrong. You have to do it at a medium pace.

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:51:54 PM EDT
Bad bad ideas
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 3:55:07 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/25/2012 3:56:39 PM EDT by ElSupremo]
What?

No Sabre-toothed gerbils?

No umbrellas?

Bowling balls?

Armadillos?

Link Posted: 12/25/2012 5:08:59 PM EDT
I'm guessing those guys putting objects into their penises have got to be either some very sick in the head and highly pain tolerant SOBs. After having two episodes in my life involving hospital visits where I was treated to Foley catheters, I know I'd couldn't do that crap to myself.
Link Posted: 12/25/2012 5:24:08 PM EDT

Originally Posted By ElSupremo:
What?

No Sabre-toothed gerbils?

No umbrellas?

Bowling balls?

Armadillos?


Its a down economy.

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