Posted: 5/19/2005 7:21:41 AM EST
What do you think would happen?
I rather enjoyed Kill Bill Vol 1 and 2.
Would have been better. Cant see how it could have been worse.
Ezikiel 25:17 Mutha Fucka. See My Wallet? Its the one that says bad mother fucker on it.
Do you see a sign in my yard that says dead jedi storage on it? well do you?
Honestly I think they would be much better characters, but for some reason I don't think he could flesh out the environments as well as Lucas.
Lucas directing the action and Tarantino directing the actors would've been the wat to go.
"Say Hut again mutherfuka, I DARE you..."
What role would "The Gimp" have?
Do they speak english in Hut?
Hell, Irvin Kersher should have directed all of them after the great job he did in Empire.
Someone would have gutted Jar Jar slowly and graphically. It would have caused me to watch Episode II.
What ain't no country I ever heard of! Do they speak Bachii in What???
The light saber! When you absolutely, positively gots to chop up every muthafucka in the room!
I can't stand Tarantino... So I'm glad he didn't make Ep. I - III!
I think that Lucas should have stepped aside and let others adapt his stories to the screen... Especially Eps. I and II.
Episode III stands on its own IMHO. It's a very good movie. If Lucas had done Eps. I and II the way he did III, there would be no people whining about him messing up our childhood memories.
(Samual Jackson voice)
"What does Jabba the Hut look like?"
"Does he look like a bitch?"
"Bocce, motherf***er! Do you speak it?"
"That's right, the Force came down and stopped these motherf***in' lasers!"
(Alec Guiness voice)
"You don't need to rob this coffee shop."
(Eric Stoltz voice)
"You've got to stick the light saber into the tauntaun with a stabbing motion."
(John Travolta voice)
"I'm kinda curious about that myself!"
That's all I can think up for now, but this is such a rich gold mine of parody I'm sure I'll be back-
How about a remake of Episode 4
"Like a Virgin" is all about a
girl who digs a guy with a big
dick. The whole song is a
metaphor for big dicks.
No it's not. It's about a girl
who is very vulnerable and she's
been fucked over a few times.
Then she meets some guy who's
--Whoa...whoa...time out Greenbay.
Tell that bullshit to the
(looking through his
Yoda...who the fuck is Yoda?
It's not about a nice girl who
meets a sensitive boy. Now
granted that's what "True Blue" is
about, no argument about that.
Arrrgh (SUBTITLE: Which one is "True Blue?)
You don't remember "True Blue?"
That was a big ass hit for
Madonna. Shit, I don't even
follow this Tops In Pops shit, and
I've at least heard of "True
ARRRGH! ARGH! GURGGLE!
(SUBTITLE: "Look, asshole, I didn't say I
ain't heard of it. All I asked
was how does it go? Excuse me
for not being the world's biggest
I hate Madonna.
(Han Solo blasts Gredo under the table)
I like her early stuff. You know,
"Lucky Star," "Borderline" - but
once she got into her "Papa Don't
Preach" phase, I don't know, I
Hey, fuck all that, I'm
making a point here. You're gonna
make me lose my train
Oh fuck, Yoda's that little green
I found this old datalog in a
robe I ain't worn in a bantha's
age. Yoda what? What the fuck
was his last name?
Where was I?
You said "True Blue" was about a
nice girl who finds a sensitive
fella. But "Like a Virgin" was a
metaphor for big dicks.
Let me tell ya what "Like a
Virgin"'s about. It's about some
twilek who's a regular fuck
I mean all the time, morning, day,
night, afternoon, dick, dick,
dick, dick, dick,
dick, dick, dick, dick, dick,
(SUBTITLE: How many dicks was that?)
(SUBTITLE: A lot.)
Then one day she meets a Mace Windu
motherfucker, and it's
like, whoa baby. This mother
fucker's like Charles Bronson in
"The Great Escape." He's diggin
tunnels. Now she's gettin this
serious dick action, she's feelin
something she ain't felt since
Chew? Yoda Chew? No.
It hurts. It hurts her. It
shouldn't hurt. Her pussy should
be Bubble-Yum by now. But when
this cat fucks her, it hurts. It
hurts like the first time. The
pain is reminding a fuck machine
what is was like to be a virgin.
Hence, "Like a Virgin."
they wouldn't have sucked ass
Yoda: Call a... a... a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris you know?
Mace Windu : They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?
Yoda: Have the metric system they have. A Quarter Pounder they would not know what the fuck is.
Mace Windu : Then what do they call it?
Yoda: A Royale with cheese they call it.
Mace Windu : A Royale with cheese. What do they call a Big Mac?
Yoda: Call it le Big-Mac, still is a Bic Mac it is.
Mace Windu : Le Big-Mac. Ha ha ha ha. What do they call a Whopper?
Yoda: Into the Burger King I did not go.