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Posted: 2/1/2006 8:36:52 PM EDT
From an E-Mail I just got:

(On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?


Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"


--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.


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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
--Mariah Carey

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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very
important part of your life,"
--Brooke Shields, during an interview to become
Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.


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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part
of my body,"
--Winston Bennett,
University of Kentucky basketball forward.


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"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the
lowest crime rates in the country,"
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.


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­


"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through
our papers. We are the president."
--Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of
subpoenaed documents.


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"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"
--A congressional candidate in Texas.


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<­BR>"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark


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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's
the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
--Al Gore, Vice President

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"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."

--Dan Quayle

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"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much
clean air do we need?"
--Lee Iacocca

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"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A
genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." -
--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.


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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
--Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

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­

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."

--Bill Clinton, President

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"We are ready for an unforeseen event that
may or may not occur."
--Al Gore, VP

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"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come
from overseas."
--Keppel Enderbery

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"Your food stamps will be stopped effective
March 1992 because we received notice that
you passed away. May God bless you. You may
reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
--Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina


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"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack
in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their
heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
--Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,­,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 8:48:24 PM EDT
We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
--Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

Thats an officer for you .
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 8:57:05 PM EDT
"I'm the commander — see, I don't need to explain — I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president."

—as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 9:03:00 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DScott:
"... I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president."

—as quoted in Bob Woodward's Bush at War



Did anyone notice that they almost used that line verbatim in Battlestar Galactica ?

Link Posted: 2/1/2006 9:05:48 PM EDT
Another fun one:

"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it."

—Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001

Do you think he's suggesting Americans need more target practice?

Boost the CMP!!
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 9:20:18 PM EDT

"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark Baseball Hall of Famer Yogi Berra

Fixed it for you.
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 9:26:04 PM EDT

Originally Posted By GiggleSmith:

"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark Baseball Hall of Famer Yogi Berra

Fixed it for you.



That's what I was thinkin' too...sounded awfully familiar. Hey its a cut'n'paste job from the e-mail bin, what can'ya do.
Link Posted: 2/1/2006 9:54:33 PM EDT

If you wanna feel smarter, go work in a job that deals with the public for a while.
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