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Posted: 9/16/2004 3:19:15 PM EST
I pulled into my driveway this evening from work and noticed that my New Bush/Cheney yard sign was pulled out of the ground and thrown into my front landscaping. I immediately knew who the culprit was and I was actually a little amused because I fully expected it. He just walked by the house but I did not confront him because he had his 7 year old daughter with him (and I'm a Nice guy) so I just said "Hello" as he walked back and I put the sign back into the ground. I plan to confront him later this evening as he always takes a stroll through our neighborhood alone at about 9:00 P.M. (my other neighbor said that she saw him throwing the sign into my bushes) I plan to voice my displeasure with his action and the malicious nature that most liberals express when it comes to a losing battle. I'm planning to invite him to sit down with a beer and discuss our differences but be very direct that I will not tolerate some hippy dildo fucking around with my property. Any advice you can give would be appreciated and I'll update...

OH GOODY, HE JUST WALKED OUTSIDE......I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:21:24 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:22:05 PM EST
this cant be good, that was pretty f'ed up to throw the sign in the bushes.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:22:22 PM EST
Just pick up another sign and put it in his front yard. Or put a bush bumber sticker on his car where he wont notice it.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:22:35 PM EST
Use a hose on him. Police rarely arrest hosers when it comes to neighbors. Plus, you can have him arrested for trespass and harassment. Maybe throw a bit of disorderly conduct in for good measure!

Hose the fucker like a bad dog!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:23:15 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
I would discreetly decorate the bottom edge of the sign with single-edged razor blades. It's your property, located ON your property--a ruthless response is called for, IMO.




DAMN! That's a good idea


- BG
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:24:27 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
I would discreetly decorate the bottom edge of the sign with single-edged razor blades. It's your property, located ON your property--a ruthless response is called for, IMO.



You can be arrested or sued civily for setting a "trap." That's a big no no and is very "not good" advice.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:24:36 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/16/2004 3:25:16 PM EST by ThunderStick]
+1 Put some Bush stickers on his car

Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:24:56 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
I would discreetly decorate the bottom edge of the sign with single-edged razor blades. It's your property, located ON your property--a ruthless response is called for, IMO.



I hate to say it, but despite how funny that would be at first he would STILL probably be in trouble. Maybe not from a criminal standpoint, but I bet the guy would have a civil lawsuit for sure.

You know how liberals are...SUE SUE SUE!!!! Until I get my way!!!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:25:38 PM EST

Originally Posted By Balzac72:
Use a hose on him. Police rarely arrest hosers when it comes to neighbors. Plus, you can have him arrested for trespass and harassment. Maybe throw a bit of disorderly conduct in for good measure!

Hose the fucker like a bad dog!


+1
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:25:52 PM EST

Originally Posted By BUCC_Guy:

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
I would discreetly decorate the bottom edge of the sign with single-edged razor blades. It's your property, located ON your property--a ruthless response is called for, IMO.




DAMN! That's a good idea


- BG




That could be considered a booby trap. You could lose your house over it. Bad kitty! Stake out, gunpoint, arrest, 911, charge is burglary and trespassing. Get some.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:26:09 PM EST
Set up a video camera and catch him on tape.

Then post it.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:26:29 PM EST
can't wait to hear the reply

[sarcasm on] beat the fuck out of him [sarcasim off]
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:28:11 PM EST
Electrify the sign. Not enough to hurt him, just give a shock. Like the doggie fences.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:28:52 PM EST

Originally Posted By the:
Set up a video camera and catch him on tape.

Then post it.



Better yet, catch him on tape and then mail the tape to all the neighbors on the street and the local news station (not that they'd probably play it, considering most news is left biased).
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:28:57 PM EST
Or, put a shitload of black grease on the bottom of the sign. That stuff is hard to get off and smells bad.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:29:14 PM EST
S, S again!
S
&
SU
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:31:42 PM EST
For the sign: a length of barbed wire, or maybe some good-sized nails point-down protruding from the bottom edge. Or anchor it with 50 lb monofilament to a tree or house so he throws himself face down on the cement when he tries to throw it. You want pain, not injury. That way if you end up in court, the jury is laughing its collective balls off rather than being horrified by the neighbors finger stumps.

For the poster:

hippy dildo


Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:32:32 PM EST

Originally Posted By Q3131A:
Or, put a shitload of black grease on the bottom of the sign. That stuff is hard to get off and smells bad.



outstanding
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:33:30 PM EST
Put him under citizen's arrest. Hold him on your front lawn with your AR and then sue him. *

*Penguin_101, AR15.com but not limited to those are not responsible for the results of doing what is posted above.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:35:27 PM EST
Carefully cut a patch out of your lawn, dig a holl the size of the patch, cement the post in, then cover up the cement with the patch. Videotape / webcam the resulting frustration as he attempts to yank the sign out.

CW
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:35:35 PM EST

Originally Posted By wildearp:

Originally Posted By BUCC_Guy:

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
I would discreetly decorate the bottom edge of the sign with single-edged razor blades. It's your property, located ON your property--a ruthless response is called for, IMO.




DAMN! That's a good idea


- BG




That could be considered a booby trap. You could lose your house over it. Bad kitty! Stake out, gunpoint, arrest, 911, charge is burglary and trespassing. Get some.



That WOULD absolutely be considered a booby trap.

But I know tbk1 was just joking.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:35:51 PM EST
hehe, electric shock WOULD be quite funny


- BG
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:36:12 PM EST

Tagged.

Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:37:02 PM EST
Take the wires that protrude down from the sign and stick them into two coffee cans full of cement. That way it will make it harder to pick up and throw, and you want get into trouble when he tries it again.

"Yes officer, I put cement there because the wind kept blowing it into my front yard."
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:37:51 PM EST
write bush/cheney 2004 with his blood on his house
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:39:24 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/16/2004 3:42:01 PM EST by thebeekeeper1]
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:39:36 PM EST
Put some antifreeze out for him...
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:40:05 PM EST

Originally Posted By peekay:
write bush/cheney 2004 with his blood on his house



LOL
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:40:50 PM EST
I keep some paintballs in the freezer for situations like this. Put a fishing line on a can in your house and wait for the alrt. A frozen paintball is about the worst thing you can "legally" get away with...
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:43:20 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/16/2004 3:43:33 PM EST by Misery]
Smear your feces all over the back and edges of the sign and the posts. No one will touch it! Plus the sign still looks fine from the front and gets your message out
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:43:49 PM EST

Originally Posted By ar50troll:
I keep some paintballs in the freezer for situations like this. Put a fishing line on a can in your house and wait for the alrt. A frozen paintball is about the worst thing you can "legally" get away with...






OUCH
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:44:21 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:45:36 PM EST
Hell, just go to the local Republican headquarters and get all the Bush signs you can, put them on the side of your house that faces his, your car and in the lawn where he has to see them. Then call the local PD and sign out a trespass warrant against him. Simple and legal.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:45:58 PM EST

Originally Posted By peekay:
write bush/cheney 2004 with his blood on his house



I'm thinking that a few well placed "Dog Log Landmines" would be appropriate, after he's done digging dog shit out of the tread on his shoes, he may think twice about sign napping.

"Things that make you say EWWWWW"!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:46:08 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:47:54 PM EST

Originally Posted By Misery:
Smear your feces all over the back and edges of the sign and the posts. No one will touch it! Plus the sign still looks fine from the front and gets your message out hr


Thats got to be the best one I've heard yet.
I might do that myself since mine has beenstolen 2x now
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:47:54 PM EST
If this happens at night, cover your yard with something that will leave a trail.
Oil would be great, but it would obviously kill your lawn.
Maybe you could make some really watery mud and spread it around the sign, as it wouldn't really hurt your lawn.
Maybe ketchup would work, or blueberry syrup or blackberry jelly.
What I envision is some dumbass sneaking up to your sign, then walking home, leaving a trail, and hopefully leaving stains on his carpet, too.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:48:26 PM EST
Wrap a turd in some Kerry/Edwards stickers and toss it in front of his door. Afterall, that's what they are.

Then put up about 20 more Bush/Cheney signs in your front yard. LOL. If you must piss someone off, go all out. Hell, line the entire yard with Bush/Cheney signs, making sure you place as many facing his property as possible. He'd never try to pull them up because we all know that's too much manual labor for a liberal to attempt.
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:49:36 PM EST
Willing to spend a little money to solve the problem?

Secure the tripwire to the sign.

www.stopthecrime.com/prod-ab2000.htm
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:50:04 PM EST

Originally Posted By haloemt:

Originally Posted By Misery:
Smear your feces all over the back and edges of the sign and the posts. No one will touch it! Plus the sign still looks fine from the front and gets your message out



Thats got to be the best one I've heard yet.
I might do that myself since mine has beenstolen 2x now



Just get some decent rubber gloves. It will be nasty, but effective. May have to reapply (rain, ect...).
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:53:22 PM EST
He has been gone for a long time! I wonder if police had to intervene!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:55:11 PM EST
tagged
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:56:23 PM EST

Originally Posted By mr_camera_man:
Willing to spend a little money to solve the problem?

Secure the tripwire to the sign.

www.stopthecrime.com/prod-ab2000.htm



oh I like that! OC the bastard!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:57:22 PM EST
But, But.... Liberals are all about tolerance!......Right?
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:57:42 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:58:09 PM EST
Update?
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:59:53 PM EST
I like the black grease idea.. If he denys it today, definetely do it. Smear it all over that bitch, and go looking for him the next time it moves. Catch him 'black' handed. :]
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 3:59:57 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 4:00:07 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
A booby trap?? Geez, you guys see boobies everywhere. Next you'll be seeing penises (peni?) in the site logo. his

Edit for spelling.

thats what I'm talking about.Sometimes its worth getting in a lil trouble.Hate to even imagine what I would do. For starters put a BIG Bush sign ON your house as a dare to the fucker to touch that!!!
Link Posted: 9/16/2004 4:04:27 PM EST
Yup, fecal matter would work well....even better do this. Take some 1/4 inch PVC and cap the ends. Drill a whole buch of holes along the top and fill it with the nastiest concation you can find. I am thinking maybe a mixture of pepper spray, ink, and fecal matter.

Attach one along the top, and another along the bottom between the posts. It won't spill untill someone pulls it our and tilts it and looks innocent enough, even more innocent looking if you construct the whole frame from PVC.

But once it is pulled up he gets covered in pepper spray and ink and crap!
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