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Posted: 6/3/2008 10:07:12 AM EST
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:08:59 AM EST
Once again, Mr. Darwin kept from having his way.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:09:11 AM EST
WOW!
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:09:39 AM EST
Viva America
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:10:12 AM EST
I know a soldier that got locked inside the cab of an LMTV.

It takes all kinds.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:20:09 AM EST
[Last Edit: 6/3/2008 10:20:44 AM EST by Skibane]

She couldn’t hear the officers instructions through the rolled-up windows


What, she was parked in a "no-shouting zone"? The officers had laryngitis?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:21:08 AM EST
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:21:15 AM EST
Was she blonde?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:21:48 AM EST
Had to be blonde.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:23:01 AM EST
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:24:36 AM EST

Originally Posted By SmilingBandit:
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.


Some cars are really, really hard to break into.

I think it was a 2001 Lexus, but this fucker had some rock-solid windows. Using a sledge hammer, hammer & chisel, and finally a pick axe (which knocked out a tiny chip) the window remained un-cracked, un-scratched and completely brand new looking.

This is with a half dozen firemen and police officers trying to bust out the window for a good hour before a "locksmith" (read: tow truck driver with "i steal cars" kit) was called. Then he couldn't make entry using all his picks and pry tools and slim jims so the car sat there for two days until the Lexus dealership opened on Monday and a "master key" was used to unlock the vehicle.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:25:06 AM EST
some people
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:25:33 AM EST
wow, she is a stupid...
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:27:28 AM EST
I want this woman!
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:28:58 AM EST

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:29:50 AM EST
DAMN!!

I need that Family guy screen shot.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:30:06 AM EST

Originally Posted By Tolip:
Once again, Mr. Darwin kept from having his way.


+1
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:31:45 AM EST
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:32:43 AM EST
The story is probably apocryphal, but I worked AAA road service about 15 years ago and a tow truck driver said he got a call from some woman who was flipping out because couldn't get into her car. Her key fob remote battery had died. He took her key ring, got the key and opened her door the old fashioned way, by putting the key in the lock and turning it.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:33:36 AM EST

Originally Posted By PFC-Demon:

Originally Posted By SmilingBandit:
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.


Some cars are really, really hard to break into.

I think it was a 2001 Lexus, but this fucker had some rock-solid windows. Using a sledge hammer, hammer & chisel, and finally a pick axe (which knocked out a tiny chip) the window remained un-cracked, un-scratched and completely brand new looking.

This is with a half dozen firemen and police officers trying to bust out the window for a good hour before a "locksmith" (read: tow truck driver with "i steal cars" kit) was called. Then he couldn't make entry using all his picks and pry tools and slim jims so the car sat there for two days until the Lexus dealership opened on Monday and a "master key" was used to unlock the vehicle.


Out of curiosity, why were you trying to get into the Lexus?



Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


Yeah, but she could never run away from him. He could just shut the door, tell her it's locked, and she'll never find a way out.

And if he really wants to screw with her, he can put her in a round room and tell her the toilet is in the corner.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:38:13 AM EST

Originally Posted By Hector_X:
The story is probably apocryphal, but I worked AAA road service about 15 years ago and a tow truck driver said he got a call from some woman who was flipping out because couldn't get into her car. Her key fob remote battery had died. He took her key ring, got the key and opened her door the old fashioned way, by putting the key in the lock and turning it.


That'll be $50.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:39:39 AM EST
Reminds me of this. Blondestar

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrt2q6Mpeyc
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:46:56 AM EST

Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:54:28 AM EST

Originally Posted By Only_Hits_Count:

Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....


You would be wrong, Google "electric dildo".

I feel so dirty now!
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:54:39 AM EST
I am beginning to realty loath and despise about 70% of women.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:55:22 AM EST
They should have called the fire department.

Then they would have cut her car apart to remove her from her car.

Placed her in an ambulance and sent her to the most expensive hospital and Doctors around to treat her for her stupidity, I mean her heat exposure for beign trapped in a sealed vehicle all that time.

Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:55:59 AM EST

Originally Posted By Only_Hits_Count:

Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....


The kind that vibrate or come with flashing lights do.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:56:01 AM EST

Originally Posted By Only_Hits_Count:

Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....


Personal experience talking?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 10:56:53 AM EST
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:07:41 AM EST
How the hell did a person like that pass the drivers test in the first place?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:08:52 AM EST

Originally Posted By Neotopia:
How the hell did a person like that pass the drivers test in the first place?


Good tongue control?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:22:06 AM EST

Originally Posted By PFC-Demon:

Originally Posted By SmilingBandit:
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.


Some cars are really, really hard to break into.

I think it was a 2001 Lexus, but this fucker had some rock-solid windows. Using a sledge hammer, hammer & chisel, and finally a pick axe (which knocked out a tiny chip) the window remained un-cracked, un-scratched and completely brand new looking.

This is with a half dozen firemen and police officers trying to bust out the window for a good hour before a "locksmith" (read: tow truck driver with "i steal cars" kit) was called. Then he couldn't make entry using all his picks and pry tools and slim jims so the car sat there for two days until the Lexus dealership opened on Monday and a "master key" was used to unlock the vehicle.


I don't know who this tow truck driver is but a 2001 Lexus is cake.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:26:17 AM EST
[Last Edit: 6/3/2008 11:26:28 AM EST by Schulze]

Originally Posted By PFC-Demon:

Originally Posted By SmilingBandit:
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.


Some cars are really, really hard to break into.

I think it was a 2001 Lexus, but this fucker had some rock-solid windows. Using a sledge hammer, hammer & chisel, and finally a pick axe (which knocked out a tiny chip) the window remained un-cracked, un-scratched and completely brand new looking.


Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:28:03 AM EST
I had a lady that locked her keys in the trunk of her '99 Accord.
When I got there she was sitting in it listening to the radio with the engine running.
I asked her why she didn't call and cancel, she replied "because my keys are in the trunk, and all I have is my valet key". So I reached around her and pulled the trunk release and wrote her a bill for $75.
She was still crying when I left.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:31:20 AM EST

Originally Posted By Swindle1984:

Originally Posted By Only_Hits_Count:
To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....


The kind that vibrate or come with flashing lights do.


Do you use them often?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:31:50 AM EST

Originally Posted By thumper10mm:
I had a lady that locked her keys in the trunk of her '99 Accord.
When I got there she was sitting in it listening to the radio with the engine running.
I asked her why she didn't call and cancel, she replied "because my keys are in the trunk, and all I have is my valet key". So I reached around her and pulled the trunk release and wrote her a bill for $75.
She was still crying when I left.


Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:34:12 AM EST
Simply amazing
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:44:33 AM EST

Originally Posted By thumper10mm:
I had a lady that locked her keys in the trunk of her '99 Accord.
When I got there she was sitting in it listening to the radio with the engine running.
I asked her why she didn't call and cancel, she replied "because my keys are in the trunk, and all I have is my valet key". So I reached around her and pulled the trunk release and wrote her a bill for $75.
She was still crying when I left.


Aww man, thats farking AWESOME!!

$75 bill for hitting the trunk release!!
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 11:46:03 AM EST
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 12:15:29 PM EST

Originally Posted By Vamousegun:

Originally Posted By Only_Hits_Count:

Originally Posted By Dilbert_556:

Originally Posted By Merrell:
I want this woman!


Why? You'd probably have to call her on her cell to tell her how to change batteries in her dildo.


To clarify, I don't believe dildos use batteries....


Personal experience talking?


yeah, the GF's like the dolphin or 'pocket rocket' models- waterproof adds to the showertime fun.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 12:34:16 PM EST
I replaced both headlight bulbs for a neighbor who swore they burned out. Later I felt a little dumb for not checking them first. After the replacements, she got in, twisted the switch, and said "See? They STILL don't work."

I got in, tried, it, and they went on. She had only turned the switch to the first (parking lights) position. Yes, the owners manual was in the glove box. Now she has two spare bulbs. at least.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 12:35:17 PM EST

Originally Posted By Cypher214:
Had to be blonde.


No-- the blonde was the one who locked herself inside the convertible with the top down.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 4:09:59 PM EST
I went on a sprinkler repair call to fix a control box that wouldn't power on. My buddy hit the reset switch on the power outlet and gave the guy a bill for $65.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 4:19:05 PM EST

Originally Posted By Big_Bear: Once officers were able to talk to the woman on the phone, they were able to tell her how to manually operate the slide lock mechanism on the inside door panel to open the door and free herself.
Was she a blonde with a huge rack?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 4:21:06 PM EST

Originally Posted By Skibane:

She couldn’t hear the officers instructions through the rolled-up windows


What, she was parked in a "no-shouting zone"? The officers had laryngitis?


She was talking on her cell phone.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 4:23:10 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/3/2008 4:26:12 PM EST by fxntime]

Originally Posted By PFC-Demon:

Originally Posted By SmilingBandit:
Should have broken out her rear window to more easily pass on the instructions.


Some cars are really, really hard to break into.

I think it was a 2001 Lexus, but this fucker had some rock-solid windows. Using a sledge hammer, hammer & chisel, and finally a pick axe (which knocked out a tiny chip) the window remained un-cracked, un-scratched and completely brand new looking.

This is with a half dozen firemen and police officers trying to bust out the window for a good hour before a "locksmith" (read: tow truck driver with "i steal cars" kit) was called. Then he couldn't make entry using all his picks and pry tools and slim jims so the car sat there for two days until the Lexus dealership opened on Monday and a "master key" was used to unlock the vehicle.


Unless the windows were armored, I CANNOT see that happening. A frikkin PICKAXE? Was Tinkerbell swinging it? If it was "chipped" it would have shattered plain and simple, safety glass is very predictable when it comes to breaking once the surface is compromised.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 4:23:16 PM EST

Originally Posted By thumper10mm:
I had a lady that locked her keys in the trunk of her '99 Accord.
When I got there she was sitting in it listening to the radio with the engine running.
I asked her why she didn't call and cancel, she replied "because my keys are in the trunk, and all I have is my valet key". So I reached around her and pulled the trunk release and wrote her a bill for $75.
She was still crying when I left.


Don't the rear seats fold down......................
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 5:18:08 PM EST
are you kidding me?
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 5:45:22 PM EST

Originally Posted By Hector_X:
The story is probably apocryphal, but I worked AAA road service about 15 years ago and a tow truck driver said he got a call from some woman who was flipping out because couldn't get into her car. Her key fob remote battery had died. He took her key ring, got the key and opened her door the old fashioned way, by putting the key in the lock and turning it.


I had that happen to. Had a customer ask to use the store phone to call someone to pick her up because the battery died. I then asked her if she had just tried using the key to unlock the door. I had to explain it to her twice before she understood.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 5:49:41 PM EST
That is tooo friggin crazy we had the exact same call when I got to work today. She was able to open her hood and got jumped before we got there. How friggin strange is that.
Link Posted: 6/3/2008 5:49:43 PM EST
At least this woman has a head to rest her ankles on.
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